Hell Found Me
Hell Found Me
Hell found me.
He found me the day I was born. He lurked there, in the shadows beneath the hospital bed. He slithered up in the rush of blood to enter my newborn body. Hell mated with my virgin self and made me enter the world unclean. While they all laughed and cried for mirth, my body was tortured into howling screams by Hell’s rape. Hell filled me, chasing and devouring any bit of Heaven in me. He devoured good and righteousness. He devoured my soul.
I mourn and wear black for the loss of my soul. It is replaced with the insinuating blackness of Hell. Many think that Hell is fiery, blazing wrath, with demons cackling everywhere you look, and endless pain and suffering. As the one with Hell inside, I can tell you that only the last bit is true. There are no flames, wrath, or demons. But the blackness that replaced my soul is haunted by endless screams, moans of despair, cries of lonely sorrow. Hell is naught but despicable, infinite loneliness.
At my young age, I have born Hell’s children. Hell has lain inside my body many times, and through painful and torturing labor have I come, to bring the Demons of Hell into the world. I have no protection from Hell.
He hovers over my shoulder even now, reading my words. I tell him this is naught but a story, prompted by only words. Hell does not feel mercy. He will be ruthless if I displease him. I cannot break away from him. He will twist his dead fingers deep into my hair and drag me back to make harsh love to me again.
I use the term “make love” only because it is simple. Hell is not a simple being. I lie beneath his shadow body every night and writhe in the pain he gives me. He penetrates deep, ignoring my mortal limits, until he spears my heart. I cry out his name, and not in pleasure. I beg him to stop, but as I said, I am mortal. A being such as Hell commands power far more than a mortal might ever dream.
He fastens me tight with black chains that burn my naked skin. He turns any bed into hard, cold stone and forces me against it. His body crushes me, and every night I bleed as though I were a virgin once more. His lips leave scorched red marks on my skin. My own lips are swollen and red because of the intensity of his torturing kiss.
I ask him why. He tells me, very coolly and nonchalantly, that I am Hell’s whore, and will never cease to be so as long as I live. I ask him if he will kill me soon. He tells me no, that he enjoys me too much. He tells me that he may even make me stay with him for an eternity. I cry in my sleep and he sees, for the being Hell needs no rest. He makes no comfort. He delights in my pain, and causes more to me every day, even when we are not in bed. I walk about scarred, with him always beside me.
Will I ever be rid of Hell? I do not know. But although his demons are born from my body, it was not my decision. Hell found me.
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