Aviary

I didn't know what to do after this. I didn't know if I should keep the boy close or not. He was going to change my life, I was sure of that. But would it be for the better? Would my family suffer from it? My kids still come first of course.
But at least I know more about him now and I could imagine. He was lonely. He only found sanctuary with the birds and I didn't want to take that away from him. I would be a heartless bastard if I did that!
And I was still puzzled as to why he had accepted the fact that I'd raped him. Why was he okay with it? I really wondered if he was afraid of me, even after I had held him like that on his bed.
I didn't know what my feelings were towards him. He aroused me. Every time I had looked at him I had felt a knot in my chest which almost could be described as butterflies.
I hadn't thought there would be another encounter like that in the aviary, but I was wrong.
I had gone for the bottle of scotch again when there was a knock on the back door. I knew at once who it was so I dreaded answering the door. I hesitated, and drained my glass when he knocked for the second time. I couldn't ignore him could I? What if he needed something for the birds? So, I went to open the door.

As I approached the door, I could see him looking at me through the window. His eyes were fixed on me and he had an expression on his face that I couldn't place. I dreaded to open the door, but I had to.

So I did, and there was a short silence in which we looked at each other. But suddenly, Matthew stepped closer and we were almost face to face when he breathed: 'I want more.'

'What?' I asked him with surprise and noticed his pupils were fully dilated. Was he aroused?

'More - I want more,' he said as he seized my head and slammed his lips against mine for the first time. He kissed me and I kissed hungrily back. I knew it was stupid to kiss a boy his age but I figured I didn’t care. I needed that boy and I could feel how desperate he was. He needed me as well.

‘Are you - ,’ I said between kisses, ‘- sure about this?’

‘Yes,’ he breathed between kisses and he pushed me into the direction of the settee. He pushed me down in a sitting position and sat down, straddling my lap.

We kissed until we were both out of breath, inhaling air through our mouths as we broke up. I looked into his eyes and for the first time, I felt a connection form between us right away. We were so close and for the first time, he was looking at me without averting his eyes. I felt I was never going to let go of this lad.

He started to unbutton my shirt but already at the first button, I grew impatient so I pulled my shirt over my head, knocking my glasses off my head. They fell on the floor and I left them where they were. I felt lucky that I was near-sighted because I could still see him clearly. I pushed his coat down off his shoulders and pulled his woolen sweater over his head, together with the t-shirt he wore underneath.

I was a bit shocked by how skinny he was. I could see his ribs through his skin and his waist was so slim. But his arms looked strong and so did his shoulders and chest. But he didn’t give me a chance to ask because he continued to kiss me again.

‘When are your kids coming home?’ he asked me as he started to run his hands through my hair.

‘I pick them up at three,’ I breathed. That would mean we still had an hour! And I knew a lot of things could happen in an hour.

He ran his hands over my chest and I shuddered, my hands sliding up his back. He started to kiss my throat and neck and I let out a suppressed moan. I hadn't felt someone's lips on my skin for quite some time now and it felt wonderful!

I did think of Valerie, but I didn't feel I was betraying her. I knew I had to move on and maybe this was my chance. Next to that, I was desperate for sex.

He began to tug my belt and I managed to lower my trousers down to my ankles in a record time. I wanted to do the same to his trousers, but he had grabbed the rim of my pants and pulled them down as well, lowering himself off the settee and onto his knees. Before I realized what was to come, he had taken my cock into his mouth. I gasped with surprise and threw my head back. I hadn't received a blowjob in years! Valerie wasn't keen on oral at all, which had disappointed me in the beginning. But I had accepted it because I had loved her.

I did notice he wasn't experienced, but what he did, he did well. I could feel how he ran his wet tongue over my shaft, taking my length into his warm mouth and tightening his lips around it. I wondered what had him do this all of a sudden, because I really hadn't expected him to be as passionate as this!

He suddenly took my cock out of his mouth and I finally opened my eyes again, feeling rather disappointed. But he began to take of his trousers and I felt a grin appear on my face.

I looked at the coffee table and opened a drawer. There was a little jar of Vaseline in it. Val always had rather dry lips and she used to use it and I secretly thanked her for keeping it so close all the time.

As soon as Matthew had taken off his trousers and pants, he crawled back on top of me. I opened the jar and took a bit of Vaseline on my finger. I threw the jar carelessly away and rubbed some of the Vaseline around his anus, forcing my finger into him. He exhaled sharply as I wiggled my finger around, greasing his entrance as good as I could. I inserted a second finger and a third when I was sure he could handle it. I caressed his insides with my fingers, scraping my fingertips over the little swollen lump which made Matthew whimper and moan even more. I took my fingers out of him and he moved closer. I took my own cock in my hand and pressed it against his anus while he gently lowered himself down onto it. I was eager to be inside him but knew I have to do this slowly or else it would hurt him too much. I was experienced with anal sex, and especially with men so I knew what had to be done before we could do this.

He whimpered in pain and cringed. I, in return, gasped as a rush of excitement soared through my stomach. I wanted to start ramming into him at once but I know that would make it too painful for him. So I let him rock his hips for a few times until his entrance was smoothed enough so I could thrust harder.

I didn’t want to hold back at all, but I didn’t want to leave him unsatisfied, so I closed my hand around his cock, and started to stroke him rapidly. For a moment, he was unable to move and he whimpered because I was stimulating both his cock and his prostate. So it didn’t take long before he came in my hand, spilling his warm thick seed over my chest and stomach. I forced my soaked fingers into his mouth and he took it all in. I removed my fingers so I could kiss him, hungry to feel his wet lips against mine. His nails scraped over my chest and that was when I came, my cock pulsing with every rush of my release.

I slumped back into the pillow of the settee, catching my breath and enjoying the brief feeling of my orgasm. I had my eyes closed for a minute before I opened them again, finding Matthew breathing heavily as well. But a weak smile appeared on his face and I returned that smile. God this boy was good!

We both chuckled nervously and he leaned down on top of my chest, resting his head against my shoulder. I stroked his hair for a while, letting him catch his breath. After a while, he talked, but he didn’t look at me.

‘I want to stay with you.’

‘What?’ I asked, surprised by his sudden question. ‘You want – what?’

‘Stay – with you,’ he muttered as if he was too embarrassed to look at me.

‘What do you mean by – ‘stay’?’

‘Forever,’ he answered quietly.

I slowly started to realize what was going on. Was he saying he wanted to be with me from now on? He couldn’t be serious about that!

‘Matthew, my wife just died. I --’

‘I’m alone,’ he suddenly interrupted me.

I couldn’t reply. I didn’t know what to say.

‘So am I, Matthew,’ I answered truthfully. ‘But – I don’t know if I’m ready for this yet, especially with someone like you.’

‘Because I’m a boy?’ he asked and I could hear he sounded offended.

‘No – that’s not the problem,’ I admitted. I had been with men before and my parents knew about my preferences. I just hadn’t been with a man since I had married Val. I might be bisexual, but I had been loyal to my wife. ‘It’s – you’re so young and --‘

‘That’s not an excuse anymore,’ Matthew said as he sat up, looking at me for the first time. ‘You started it.’

‘Yes – but I’m the Head of St. Mary’s.’

Matthew went silent as he looked at me. I hoped he understood what I thought the problem was.

‘And that means you can’t be with me?’

‘It – can cause quite an uproar,’ I replied, nodding once. ‘Especially because you’re young.’

‘I’m not even a minor!’ he said as he threw his head back with annoyance.

‘No, but – parents might think –‘

‘Do you really care?’

‘I don’t, but the school board will.’

He didn’t answer me, and I knew I had made my point clear to him.

‘I can lose my job,’ I added.

‘I see,’ Matthew said as he slipped off me and started to gather his clothes. ‘I understand,’ he muttered as he dressed. He went into the kitchen and threw me a tea cloth so I could clean myself. I pulled my trousers over my hips as he sank down in the armchair, not looking at me.

‘I’m really sorry, Matthew,’ said after a while as I pulled my shirt over my head. ‘I – I can’t.’

‘Why did you start this anyway?’ Matthew snapped at me, making annoyed hand gestures. ‘If you knew it couldn’t become anything.’

I sank down on the sofa and looked at him for a while, thinking about what would be wise to tell him.

‘I – I lost control.’

‘Yeah? But why me?!’

‘I – don’t know.’

He turned his head away from me, leaning his elbow on the armrest and supporting his chin on his palm. I felt sorry for him and how I had used him for my needs. Before my marriage, I was used to one night stands and relations like that – but this was the first time I felt bad for the other person. Did I care enough for this boy to be worried about him?

I looked at my watch and saw it was nearly time to pick up my kids, so I told him: ‘I have to go.’

He nodded, and still didn’t look at me. I got up from the sofa and walked past him. I stopped when I had reached his side, hesitated, but placed my hand on his shoulder and squeezed it tenderly. He didn’t even turn to look at me, so I withdrew my hand, picked up my car keys and left the house.