Calming Coffee

Thanks for the reviews again!! Lisa, thanks for pointing out the mistake I made, I went back and changed it.
This chapter isn't the most exciting, but I deemed it necessary in helping the characters develop. Don't worry, it'll get going very soon!






Waking up on the floor is highly unpleasant. I do not recommend it. I guess some time during my freak out I must have fallen asleep. I don't know how that happened, but I'm glad it did. Maybe now I can function enough to take care of myself today. I got in the shower, thankful of my personal bathroom, got dressed, and prepared myself to meet my doom. Also known as Adam. Well, not my doom exactly, more like the guy I would have loved to date if I weren't so terrible.

I opened my door, saw that Casey's room was open and vacant, and made my way downstairs. No voices, where could they be? As I entered the kitchen I saw Casey sitting by himself. He handed me my coffee, waited for me to drink some, and then started in with the questions.

“Why did you do that? Adam told me the gist of what happened, and we were both so confused.” Of course they would discuss it. That's what I get for kissing my nephew's best friend.

“It was an accident. It shouldn't have happened. He deserves better.” Honesty, that's a good choice right?
Casey looked at me for a few moments, shook his head, sighed and said, “Better? He deserves better than you? Why? What do you think is wrong with you that you don't deserve a great guy like him? I know for a fact that you are kind, caring, attractive, and selfless.” At this point I burst out laughing, not realizing how broken it sounded.

“Selfless? Selfless. You don't even know! You don't even know what a selfish bitch I am! I can't do that to Adam, I can't! He deserves bett...” I stopped as Casey hugged me. So much hugging lately, do I seem that needy?

“James, listen to me. You aren't that person. You aren't the person they said you are. You are a good person. You are my Uncle James. You took me in when no one else would. My mom loved you so much. Would she love someone inherently terrible? If you were a 'selfish bitch' would you have been able to raise me and take care of me as well as you have? You gave up so much for me, so don't ever call yourself those names. Don't ever belittle yourself. You're so much more than that. Yeah, you had a really shitty time for a few years, but it's time for you to get over it.

"I think Adam would be good for you, and I know he likes you, and he is honestly concerned about you. I only got him to leave this morning so I could talk to you by asking him to get some things at the grocery store so you would have something to eat. So don't let the names those assholes called you become the reason you can't be with Adam. If you have a real reason, fine, let me hear it. Otherwise, give it a shot. I don't care that he's my best friend, and you're my uncle. You were always more of a brother anyway, so it's all cool. Ok?”

Wow. I didn't realize, never knew, that he thought all of that about me. I didn't realize how much I was letting Jason continue to affect my life. I know he tried to brainwash me, make me into his little toy, but I didn't realize how successful he's been. Casey's right, I need to be myself again.

“Casey, I don't know what to say. Thank you, I guess. You're right. I do need to try harder. It's hard though, the way I was treated, hearing people call you the same things all the time for years. It's hard to get over that. And all this time I've been calling myself those names too. I'm not,” I choked a little here, damn this is hard, “I'm not a dirty, slutty bitch. I'm not! I didn't want what they did!”

“I know you didn't. It's going to be better now. You need to be more confident in yourself. You were never those names they called you.” Casey said while holding back tears.

“Adam, he's so good. I just don't understand what he sees in me,” I held my hand up as I saw him about to interfere, “No, don't tell me, I get that he likes me, but I truly can't comprehend it. But he likes me, for whatever reason, and I like him. So, maybe I should try harder?”

Casey gave me a huge smile, “Yeah, just try. That's all anyone can ask.” He gave me a pat on the back, stood, and asked me my favorite question of all time, “What do you want for breakfast?”

As he was making french toast, Adam came back. I helped him bring in the grocery bags, after a slightly awkward greeting, and then set about putting everything away, missing the meaningful look Casey and Adam sent each other behind my back. We had a nice breakfast, with simple small talk and a feeling of normalcy that I had desperately needed. After breakfast Casey announced that he had to get going to work, and Adam assured him that he would stay with me as I pretended I couldn't hear them.

After Casey left, Adam came to sit down at the table again. I made the mess of everything last night, so I guess it's only fair if I start. I took a deep, cleansing breath, “I'm sorry that I reacted like that. In my past, I had some horrible things said to me, some horrible ideas about me placed in my head. It made me think that I wasn't any good for you. But, after talking to Casey, I realized that I wasn't being fair to you. If you think I'm good enough, then why should I decide differently for you? I like you. I do, but honestly I'm scared. If you want to start anything, know that it won't be easy. I'll probably panic, I might act irrational, but I will try my best.” Adam reached out with his left hand and placed it warmly over mine, and with his other hand on my chin, gently turned me to face him.

“I do want this. I'm sorry if I pushed to fast, but I like you, a lot. Can we give this, whatever this is, a chance?” I grinned, and daringly leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the lips as a response, before darting back in my chair. He laughed, “I'll take that as a yes!” and pulled me forward to kiss me properly.

Like before it was beautifully gentle, but more assured than last time. I immediately responded and played with his tongue as it danced in my mouth. He pulled me onto his lap, so I was straddling him on the chair, as we unhurriedly kissed with the passion of a new relationship. He ran his hand up and down my back, soothingly, going slightly lower each time until he reached the curve of my ass, where he rested his hands. I ran my hands through that silky black hair of his as he swallowed each moan that tried to pass through my lips.

Finally, I pulled back with a smile. “We better stop now before we go any further,” I said apologetically. He put a finger on my lips to stop me, “It's ok, I can wait until you're ready.”
I smiled again and rested my head on his shoulder. I whispered in his ear, surprised by the shiver he gave, “Do you want to go on a date?”
He pushed me back so we could look eye to eye. “I would love to go on a date with you. Anywhere in particular?”
I blushed and looked down, hoping he wouldn't think I was incredibly lame, “I just want to know you better. Maybe we can go to a park or something? Somewhere we can talk and relax? And maybe stop by Casey's work to get some lattes so he can see everything is fine.”
He smiled at me. My god, he has a fantastic smile. So tender, and sexy at the same time. “That's a lovely idea. Although, unfortunately that means you'll have to get up, even though this is so very, very comfy,” he gave my hips a light squeeze to emphasize, and I immediately jumped up.

After locking up the house we left to walk to the park down the street. It's a good thing it's a nice day! A slight chill, but no snow yet. We didn't talk much at first. It was enough to just be next to each other, with our hands brushing, enjoying the nice day. Not too many other people were out, what with it being December and all, but walking kept us warm. Not to mention all the blushing whenever I looked over at Adam and remembered our kiss!

As we walked, we started off with small observations on what was around us, and eventually started talking more about our interest. We have a lot in common, and a lot of differences too. Every once in a while he would be telling me a story about a computer repair and look at me, stop, and say, “I completely just lost you again, didn't I? Do you have any idea what I'm talking about?” And I would just laugh and tell him to finish his story.


It feels good to laugh and joke around with someone other than Casey. It makes me feel normal again. We told each other stories about our childhood, about work, friends, family, anything really that came to mind. I learned so much about his two older sisters that I felt as if they were already a part of my life. I told him a little about my sister, Casey's mom, and for once I was able to talk about my memories with fondness instead of sadness. She was a lot older than me, but she was still a big part of my life. Our mom died shortly after giving birth to me, so she was kind of like a mother to me growing up. It was nice to share those memories with Adam, and it made me realize that I'm ready to start sharing them with Casey too.

After a couple hours it started getting too chilly for me, so we hopped on a bus and went to Casey's work: “Lotta Latte.” Lame name, I know, but if you know that the owners name is Carlotta then it does actually sound a little better!

As we entered, I spotted Casey wiping down the milk and sugar area, so after giving Adam a conspiratorial smirk, I walked up behind Casey and said in a deep voice, “Sir, I think you missed a spot!” He whipped around with a glare, that quickly turned into a sigh. “James! Geez, don't do that. I thought you were an asshole customer,” he noticed a customer standing next to him waiting for the milk, “Not you of course ma'am, but it does happen!” She huffed angrily, poured milk into her coffee, and stormed out, as we all tried to contain our laughter.

“So I guess this means you guys worked some stuff out, right?” he continued cleaning nonchalantly, but I could tell he was dying for an answer.
“We're working on it still, but I'm sure a couple of free, warm, delicious beverages on this cold winter day would help us be a bit more friendly to each other. You wouldn't want the cold to seep into our hearts, would you?” Adam asked with the most adorable puppy dog look in his eyes.
“Shut up man,” Casey hit his arm, “You know we never charge you. Go up and order with Rachel and leave me to my cleaning! I'll join you on my break.”

We went up and ordered our drinks, but since Adam and Rachel were busy catching up, I went to get a table for us. Mmmmmm warm, chocolaty latte goodness. I was so into my drink that I startled a bit when a pastry dropped in front of me. I looked up at Adam as he pulled out his chair to sit.

“Sorry I took so long with Rachel, but I did convince her to give a danish since she caused you to sit all by your lonesome!” I laughed, “Yeah yeah, more like you convinced her to give you one because you're starving, and I'm just an excuse!”
At that he shrugged, “You see right through me! But are you going to complain? I am being a gentleman and sharing it with you.”

I took a piece of it, looked him straight in the eyes as I ate it, and moaned as obscenely as I could as I tasted the sweet flavors. His jaw dropped as I slowly licked my fingers. “Mmmm, yeaaah, that is so good. I think I need more, although it is a little messy. Do you mind if I get dirty?” I asked while slowly licking some frosting off my lips.
He blinked at me, “James, you...I...you...um...” he shook his head as though shaking his thoughts, “Wow, I think danishes are my new favorite pastry.”

At that point Casey joined us, giving me a pointed look, “I am not sharing my coffee cake with you!”







So there you have it! This chapter was mostly to show that they have an actual relationship outside of just crying and hugging and angst. But now the fun can start! Mwahahahaa...