"Jack" Series, Part 3: Jack Accepts

Thanks to Arya_Arsay and Catana for the reviews! Sorry for the delayed update. I'm out of town for a bit so probably won't be posting regularly for a while ... But the story IS finished and I will get all chapters up.

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5. Turn-About

So I stayed, and went back to work. Of course things weren’t exactly the same after that, though they weren’t quite as different as you might imagine either.

I’d made some concessions during my discussion with Rocky, and I couldn’t take them back now. I did believe that Rocky had Tiran’s best interests at heart, that the boys had asked for me originally, and that they all wanted me to stay. The boys might have some ulterior motives for all I knew, but getting rid of me wasn’t one of them. Perhaps I’d known or suspected these things for a while, but now I accepted them openly.

One thing I wasn’t admitting to was my newfound knowledge that Rocky and I were more alike than I once thought. I might have been persuaded that Tiran hired me for my discipline skills, but only after I’d spent a full day wondering about it. I couldn’t quite forget the facts I’d faced then.

None of it made me go any easier on the boys, of course. If anything, I was more committed to my job than ever. I understood my mission, and intended to fulfill it.

But first, I challenged Tiran on his attitude. We had a long, frank discussion and this time I believed most of what he told me. He conceded that he didn’t always show his appreciation of my efforts openly enough, and cited many of the same reasons that Rocky had given me. But he also suggested something I hadn’t thought of earlier.

"It could be," he said slowly, after many admissions and apologies, "That I don’t seem to take your work seriously because I feel like your goals aren’t exactly the same as mine."

I looked at him in surprise. "What do you mean? We both want the same thing – for your boys to be well-behaved, respectful, obedient …" I trailed off, suddenly.

Tiran saw the dawning light in my expression and nodded at me. "I want that sometimes, Jackie. There are definitely times when I want them to just shut up and do what they’re told. And you’re great at getting that."

"But …" I added, with growing comprehension. "You don’t always want them to be good little subs."

Tiran looked at me almost guiltily. "You have certain expectations for subs, Jack. A standard of behaviour that you expect them to meet. And you hold my boys to that standard … "

"Even when yours might be ... different."

Tiran sighed faintly. "It’s tricky. I know it seems odd, but the boys are my friends as well as my slaves ... at different times. I want to keep that balance, I don’t want them broken completely."

I grimaced a little. I still thought some of them could use a little breaking. But I got what Tiran was telling me. It wasn’t so different from what Rocky had said.

"Remember that time in the car …" Tiran went on. "When I made Rocky ride in the back and he told me I was being mean to him for no good reason? I was being an asshole that day. I was glad he called me on it. Rocky is good to me, most of the time. I don’t want to abuse him too often." He looked at me seriously. "It would be too easy for me."

"I punished him for speaking to you that way," I told Tiran, thinking back. "Just like I’ve punished Gabe for flirting with Ric, even if he was following your orders."

Tiran shook his head firmly. "I’m not telling you – I’m not saying don’t punish them when you think they need it. I’m not telling you how to do your job at all. I just … "

I understood. I’d been all too quick to blame Tiran for not valuing my work, but how much effort had I made to understand what he needed? "I could probably spend a little more time thinking about what you want from me, Ti."

"Yeah." Tiran looked at me and I felt like we were on the same page for the first time. "Sometimes I think you’re training them to meet your standards of behaviour, instead of mine."

I wasn’t sure I’d been training them at all – I’d never really taken the boys that seriously. Maybe it was time to start. "You’re the one who’s paying me," I agreed. "You should be able to set the terms."

And I did take Tiran’s preferences more seriously after that. But maybe more importantly, the conversation made me realize it was time to stop considering myself the victim in every case. Maybe Tiran and I both had some adjusting to do.


**********


As for Rocky, he was a little bolder after our mini-bonding session, no question. He spoke up a bit now, sometimes without being spoken to first, and his words weren’t always quite as careful as they used to be. But if he was more forward than he used to be, almost brazen sometimes, still he always managed to maintain a tone of proper respect, so it didn’t bother me too much. I could shut him down with a word or a look when I wanted to, but I have to admit it was sometimes fun to let out the leash a little.

Rocky also seemed to be making it his mission to look after my personal needs – serve me, you might say. He was at my place almost every day now, doing the cleaning or some other chore – much more often than Gabe. I asked about it once and Gabe said something vague about Tiran keeping him busy, so I guess Rocky was picking up the extra work. The upshot was, between his work at my place and the punishments I supervised, I seemed to be spending a lot of time with Rocky.

At least this new familiarity made it easier for me to get information these days. Now, when I was curious about something, I just asked Rocky.

"What’s the deal with your family anyway, Van?" I asked him once, when he was cleaning at up my place.

He didn’t stop working. "Which family, sir?"

"Your wife and kids. What’s up with that?"

Rocky hesitated slightly, as though he needed to formulate his response. "Celeste is an old friend of mine," he said after a minute. "From college. We’ve always been, you know, simpatico."

"Were you in love with her?" I interrupted.

He shrugged a little. "No, sir. I wouldn’t say that."

"But you had to go get married and have kids? What were you trying to do, play the good straight boy?"

Rocky looked at me with the little smile he used when he was about to say something impudent. "If my lord would allow me to finish my story …" he said demurely.

I laughed. "Go ahead."

He put his head to the side and looked at me. "I wasn’t play-acting with Celeste. The real reason I moved in with her was … to get away from Tiran for a while."

I stared at him and started to speak, but he went on quickly, going back to his work. "It’s not what you think, sir. I never loved Tiran any less. But after that – that whole thing with Gabe, Tiran and I went through a really … a very intense period. I was feeling a lot of, you know, guilt and gratitude and all of that. It was okay for a while, but I realized – it wasn’t what he wanted. Needed. What he needed was a friend he could count on, someone who could help him keep perspective while his own world was getting a little out of control. And I figured I wouldn’t be able to give him that perspective if I was right there in the whirlwind with him. So I thought it was time to get out of it for a while – put some distance between us. Not because I didn’t want to be with him, but so I could be a better – a more useful friend to him."

I looked at him a little skeptically. "How’d that go over with Tiran?"

Rocky smiled, but it was a sad smile. "You can imagine. He wasn’t happy. It was a lot of work to persuade him to let me go. And I don’t think he ever believed I did it for his sake. If anything, it added to his insecurity – he saw it as me leaving him. Again. So … I don’t know. I still don’t know if I did the right thing."

"Not to mention using Celeste," I added acerbically.

He looked at me sharply. "No, sir. I never did that. She had no illusions. We had the same goals – we wanted to adopt kids and create a safe environment for them. She had – has – her own relationships … I’ve never expected anything else from her. We had a mutual goal, and a good agreement on how to go about it. We made a good team. That’s all, sir."

I nodded, slowly. "And now … ?"

"Now the kids are almost grown up. They don’t need me there every day any more. Tiran told me a while ago that he’d waited for me long enough, and he’s right, I guess. So I’m here most of the time and I just go back when they need me, or when I miss them."

"Did he pay you an allowance all of the time you were living with Celeste?"

"Tiran’s always helped me out financially – whenever I’ve needed it, no strings attached. But no, he didn’t give me a formal allowance most of that time. I worked. That’s one of the things that always annoyed him – I needed to keep my job, so I couldn’t just be available to him whenever he wanted me. He finally made me quit the job, and that’s when he started the allowance."

I went on to ask the other question I was curious about. "So – straight or what, Rocky?"

He laughed out loud, and lifted his hands a little helplessly. "Who knows, sir? I … I guess I’ve usually gravitated more to women. But you know what they say … it just depends on the person." His eyes sparkled a little as he looked at me.

I wasn’t as amused. "So sex with Tiran is an order or ... ?"

"It’s a pleasure, sir," he responded firmly.

I was still considering that when Rocky spoke again, more gently this time. "My turn now?"

I gave him a puzzled look, and he added, "May I ask you a question, sir?"

He still didn’t get it, I thought. I shook my head a little, rolling my eyes. "Turn, Van? Do you think we’re equals, to take turns?"

He dropped his eyes, trying to look abashed. "Sorry sir," he said. "That was a poor choice of words. I only meant that I’m ... honoured by your interest in me. And I … was hoping for a chance to return the interest."

His words were better this time, but I heard the faint challenge behind them. And I guess I’m never one to resist a challenge.

"What do you want to know?"

He hesitated. "I was just wondering where you grew up, sir. What your background is. We know where Tiran met you but other than that ... none of us knows anything about you."

I smiled a little. True enough, and that was how I liked it. "I grew up in the mid-west," I told him shortly. "Working class family, just like you. But I knew where I fit in, and that’s where I went as soon as I was old enough." I stood up to leave, giving his ass a good slap as I went by. "And that’s about enough out of you for one day."

I heard Rocky’s resigned laugh as I left the room.


**********


Not long after the dust settled, Tiran asked when I was going back home next. Of course I’d already thought about setting the record straight with my old friends, as I should have done long ago. I told Ti I planned to make the trip within a couple of weeks, and he asked if he could join me. He wanted to see my old friends again, he said.

"Fine with me," I told him, and we agreed to go the next week.

We were sitting in the back room, Tiran with Gabe at his feet. Paul had breezed in after work, and Rocky was doing something in the big open kitchen that overlooked the back room.

"It’ll be good to see everyone," Tiran mused. "All those doms you hang out with ... it’s like a convention every time we go out."

Paul laughed sardonically. "Sure, Marxie. It’s not the tops you wanna see, it’s all those pretty subs they bring with them."

I knew that none of this was the real reason Tiran was joining me for the trip, but I appreciated the gesture so I kept my mouth shut.

Tiran looked a little sheepish. "I just take a collegial interest," he said with dignity.

Paul and Gabe laughed at that, and I could hear Rocky chuckle a little in the kitchen.

"You’d do better with one of those subs anyway," I told Tiran wryly. "At least they’re well-trained." I gave Gabe a playful look. He was doing well these days.

"Why don’t you go for the young sub type anyway, Ti?" Paul asked curiously. "Wouldn’t you have better luck with them?"

Tiran was famous for his short but passionate attachments to a particular breed of trick. They were always young and beautiful but high-strung, spoiled, overly dramatic. They kept Tiran’s interest for short periods by being temperamental and difficult, putting up some kind of resistance or challenge. Tiran would succeed with them eventually and enjoy a few days or weeks of bliss before getting bored and moving on. The pattern was obvious to everyone, except, apparently, Tiran.

Rocky laughed at Paul’s suggestion and called out, "That would be way too easy, Army! A well-trained sub wouldn’t keep him entertained. Besides ... " he added sardonically, "Ti’s got all the slaves he could possibly want at home."

"Not as many as he thinks he does," I retorted, pointedly. Rocky was no sub, whatever he might like to pretend.

"And not young ones anymore either," Paul added, a little under his breath.

I looked at Gabe again, sympathetically. I knew he was sensitive to his advancing years. "Don’t rub it in, Paulie ... "

Paul glanced down guiltily. "Oh, sorry, Sol. I meant Rocky."

"I’m however young Tiran is," Rocky countered dryly.

Then Gabe spoke up quietly. "Jack’s still young. He’ll always be young."

There was a sudden quiet in the room. I looked around, puzzled. I’m a couple of years older than Tiran. What was Gabe talking about? And why had everyone gone silent?

After a moment Paul nodded. "You’re right, honey," he said gently. "He’ll always be young now."

I guess Tiran noticed my confusion. "Not you, Jackie," he told me. "They’re talking about Jack Van Valkenburg. Rocky’s brother."

I glanced into the kitchen, and saw that Rocky had stopped moving; he was standing still by the counter, his back to us. "What do you mean, he’ll always be young?" I asked, and realized the answer even as I spoke.

"He died," Paul said. "A while ago."

Gabe nodded. "More than ten years ago. He was younger than I am now," he added reflectively.

I looked from one to the other. Jack would have been Rocky and Pat’s brother, Gabe’s father, the others’ friend. "I’m sorry," I said. "I don’t think I’d heard that. What ... happened?"

"Coke," Tiran answered bluntly. He was looking away, and I realized he was watching Rocky. "The high life. Russian roulette."

Paul shrugged a little. "He was pretty renowned, in certain circles. Worked in special effects, lots of big movies. I guess he just ... couldn’t handle it."

I didn’t know what to say to that, so for a moment I was silent. Then Gabe looked up, a little timorously. I guess maybe he felt guilty for bringing everyone down. "Anyway," he said, his voice a bit forced. "Look at Mr. Obernikoch, master. He keeps himself entertained with subs."

Gabe gave me an appealing look, and I understood. "Give me a well-trained sub over one of Ti’s drama queen brats any day," I said amiably, happy to help move the conversation back to something lighter.

Paul’s response took me aback. "Yeah, but do you ever have relationships with them?" he asked pointedly.

That was a personal question. "What?" I said, disbelievingly.

Tiran looked a little amused at my discomfort, though he still seemed slightly distracted. "It’s all very well to pick up a slave for a little R&R," he said, turning to me briefly. "But what do you do when you want some kind of ongoing ... connection to someone?"

"I have my regulars," I answered, a bit stiffly. When did this get to be about me?

Paul’s not afraid of me like the others are, so I guess my warning look didn’t work on him. "Regulars meaning you see them more than once," he said, almost challengingly. "It’s not like you have a relationship with them."

I frowned. "Of course not." Time to turn this around again. "What about you, Paul? How many subs do you have a relationship with?"

"Just one," he said mildly. "That’s enough for me."

Tiran had stopped paying attention to our conversation. I saw him go into the kitchen where Rocky still stood unmoving beside the counter; Tiran slid an arm around his waist and Rocky glanced up with a faint smile.

Meanwhile, Paul was still harassing me. "So do you, Jack? Have … you know, ongoing relationships?" he pursued.

"Of course I do, sometimes," I answered, trying not to show my annoyance. "I’m dominant, not emotionally stunted."

Gabe spoke up quietly, from the floor in front of the couch Tiran had just vacated. "Have you ever had a ... have you ever lived with someone, Mr. Obernikoch?"

I stared at him, and he blanched a little but didn’t look away. I would have shut him down, but I felt the others watching me curiously. I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of seeing me retreat.

"Once," I said finally. "For a while."

There was a pause, then Gabe asked softly, "What happened, sir?"

I felt my jaw tighten slightly. "Nothing," I answered sharply. "I just realized I ... didn’t have much to say to him."

Gabe looked down, and Paul nodded. "Maybe," Paul suggested, a bit mischievously, "You need someone a little more … challenging."

"Maybe you should worry about your own relationships, Armstrong," I said irritably. "And let me worry about mine."

Paul smiled again. "I don’t worry about mine. Speaking of Tom," he added, and raised his voice a little, "How are those cooking lessons going, Rocky?"

I glanced into the kitchen. Rocky had just turned away from Tiran and returned to whatever he was doing at the counter. "Fine, thanks, Paulie," he answered evenly. "Thanks for the loan."

"Rocky’s taking cooking lessons from Tom?" I asked.

Paul nodded. "I’m not sure why the sudden interest," he said.

In the kitchen, I caught Tiran giving Rocky a knowing, mischievous grin. "Oh – " he began, but Rocky suddenly turned to him with a raw, beseeching look, as though he knew exactly what Tiran was capable of and was begging him not to. For a moment Tiran seemed poised, watching Rocky; then he laughed and walked back over to us without saying anything else.

"Just one of those things I’ve never learned," Rocky responded composedly, once he seemed sure of Tiran’s restraint. "Always figured I should."

Tiran came back to the sofa and sat down, prodding Gabe a little. "And you’re next, Solly. You could stand to learn a few things from Tom. Paul’s lucky."

Gabe looked abashed and Paul a little smug.

"So," Tiran said, to me. "When are we leaving again?"

The conversation went on, and I didn’t get any more intrusive questions. Between Rocky and Gabe, I’d had just about as much of that as I was willing to take.


**********


And what about Sal? You might be wondering what happened to him. Well, the next time I saw him he had a few nasty looking bruises, but I never asked where they came from. And the truth was, I didn’t see him around so much any more. I don’t think Tiran cut him off entirely – we still bumped into him when we were out sometimes, and it was always very civil – but he stopped coming by the estate.

As for my friends back home, I made sure they knew exactly what I did for a living now. Tiran and I drove up together the next week, and after that, I never worried again about what the folks back home might think of me.