Playing With Fire

Chapter 4

Brevin had held Talia’s hand all the way to the chapel building. This was something to add to her growing list of ‘firsts’ when it came to the opposite sex. Not the first time she’d held a boys hand, she wasn’t *that* pathetic, but certainly the first time she’d been held so close and for so long and by someone like Brevin whose casual grip around her palm sent butterflies to her stomach.

Elise had seen. She flopped down next to Talia and poked her in the side.

“What was that?”

“What do you mean?”

Elise cleared her throat. “Why was Brevin fondling your little hand when you walked in?”

“He wasn’t fondling, he was just holding it.” But Talia was grinning foolishly. Why *had* Brevin taken her hand? There was only one conclusion in her mind and apparently it was the same one Elise had come to.

“Well looks like you finally got him interested. Only took two years.”

Talia’s smile fell. Elise always knew the perfect words to say that would ruin a great moment.

At the front of the chapel Brevin sat with his mother and younger brother, his head bowed. Elise sighed next to Talia, studying him with her until Brevin’s eyes darted in their direction. Talia saw him begin a smile but he hesitated and looked away again.

“I don’t know what you see in him.” Elise whispered after a long silence then opened her prayer book and began reading the pieces of Cosmo she’d cut out earlier.

xxx


Brevin had told her to meet him at the corner of Market and Hodson at quarter after five. The words were engrained upon her brain. But that wasn’t the reason she kept checking the clock as the end of her shift drew near, or found herself glancing out the window to look for a green pick up truck.

She and Jack had never made any verbal contract to meet every afternoon. It was just a sort of unspoken agreement that she’d find him there after her shift. What would he do if she just…didn’t show up? Easy answer, she told herself. He’d find some other girl to fool around with, if he wasn’t already. Still, she nervously wiped the counter down as the clocked ticked away.

There was something Talia didn’t want to admit about her indecision that day. Something that had more to do with deciding *if* she wanted to break off her meetings with Jack rather than *how*. There was no denying it was a hell of a lot of fun and she wondered for more than a moment if she could find a way to satisfy both wants.

Wrestling this inner war was the way she entered the alley behind Blazier’s store and saw Jack leaning against the wall, smoking. His gaze shot up to hers and he tossed the cigarette away irritably.

“There you are. Another minute and I was gonna take off.”

He trudged toward her, rain water from earlier that morning sloshing up against his dirty cargo pants. Brevin had a swagger. Jack had a stroll. Slow and easy as though he didn’t have a care in the world was the way Jack walked. He reached for her waist when Talia stepped back.

“I can’t stay today.” Today? Why had she tacked that on? She didn’t correct it though. “Something came up and I have to go right away.”

Jack sighed. His dark eyes rolled with annoyance. “You couldn’t have told me this earlier?”

“I only just found out.” She lied and threw her hands on her hips.

An action like that simply drew a grin across Jack’s mouth. He cast his eyes mockingly down and then up her body. Damn him and the way he made her knees quiver with those glances. Talia imagined what kind of an afternoon she was giving up. Looking cocky and only slightly disappointed he inched closer until he could slip his fingers through her belt loops and pull her hips against him.

“Don’t get your panties in a twist, kid, unless you want me to untangle them.” He tapped his lips against hers. “Its fine. I have things I have to take care anyway.

“Good.” She sighed. Her hands were comfortably around his back and she kissed him again, a little longer than she’d meant to until finally Jack was the one parting their embrace and laughing as he did.

“You staying or going? Because I have a ride to catch if you’re out of here.”

“I’m going.” She grunted, pushing him away from her.

“Right. See you tomorrow then.” He chuckled.

Talia didn’t say a word otherwise as she skipped up the alley back to the street.


xxx


What a difference it was to go from the tight, controlling embrace of Jack to Brevin’s standoffish manner. She was almost late arriving out of breath with flushed cheeks. Brevin had eyed her briefly, nodded hello, then handed her half a stack of flyers and an old stapler. What a greeting. She almost wished she’d stayed with Jack.

“Not much today.” He said, pulling his jacket closer around his neck as the wind hissed. “Why don’t you start here, I’ll take the other side and we can meet at the corner.”

Wonderful. She was cold and hungry and hanging up flyers that said things like ‘Trust in the Lord’ and ‘Let the Savior be your shepherd’. It wouldn’t have been so bad if she wasn’t doing it alone. *Not alone*, she told herself. Across the street Brevin wielded his stapler and every now and then she was able to catch his eye where he’d smile and send her one of his fleeting nods.

Just about every lamp post was covered in little torn papers like the ones she was putting up. They twisted in the wind, urgent to break free of the tiny clasps that held them prisoner until Talia came along to securely staple over the Nude Girls! ad with her black and white photocopy of Jesus. It’d be gone by tomorrow. Pastor Merritt’s little messages never lasted long.

“Ah, the bible thumpers.” A guttural voice laughed from somewhere near.

Talia glanced around to find a small unshaven man huddled against one of the shop windows expecting rain at any moment. He smiled when she met his gaze revealing a long row of yellow teeth.

“Messengers actually.” Talia grinned.

“Messengers of God.” He quickly darted his eyes back and forth, eyeing the people passing between them on the side walk. “You won’t find no use for those papers here.”

“Men have use for God everywhere.” She shrugged. Words of her father. They came so naturally to her lips.

“Not any more.” He pushed closer to the wall. “There’s only one God in this city. His name is Barris.”

“If that’s what you’d like to believe.”

“It’s the truth. More truthful than-“ he coughed into his shoulder. “Than your…echh…your messages.”

The old man suddenly threw into a fit of coughing so violent that Talia found herself at his side holding his back until it subsided again.

“You’re sick. You should drink some hot tea.”

“Tea won’t do me any good now.” He breathed rubbing at his chest. “I’m dead anyway.”

Talia wanted to laugh at his dramatic conclusion. “Nonsense. There’s a market just there, I can get you a packet if you like?”

He shoved her away violently. “I don’t need any tea. Not now. You can pray for me. Pray that he’ll let me live.”

“Who?”

“God.” He whispered and then began coughing again.

She didn’t reach for him this time. Talia brought her arms across her chest as the wind suddenly picked up again, a degree or two chillier. Watching the old man and considering his last word she felt small wet drops dampen the crown of her head and fall along her cheeks, the chill reaching her bones.

“Talia!”

Talia spun around as Brevin reached her. He was holding his jacket tight by the collar, his flyers sticking out of his pocket where they were stuffed along with the small stapler. Little drops of rain sprinkled his shoulders and brow.

“I was hoping we’d finish before it started raining again but…”

Rain fell across her forehead and Talia used her handful of flyers to shield the water that was beginning to come steadily now. “Does this mean we’re done?” she asked, blinking away the water and feeling disappointed despite herself.

“For now I guess. You hungry?”

She hadn't expected that. “Yes, as a matter of fact.”

“Alright, come on.”

Brevin slipped his hand into hers, to Talia’s delight, and together they ran to the small market Talia had pointed out to the old man. Once inside the glass doors the two of them shook their jackets of water with relief. It was a Latin market and had a strong scent of grilled peppers that Talia liked.

“You ever been here?”

“Once with Elise.” Talia nodded.

“Oh that’s right.” If she didn’t know better, she thought Brevin might have flushed just a bit. He looked about the room as though flustered and trying to find his bearings again. “She loves this kind of stuff doesn’t she?”

“Spicy is the only way Elise takes her food.” And men, as Talia was fairly sure Elise had been seeing one of the boys that worked there. But like Talia, Elise was always closed lipped when it came to that sort of thing. “The burritos are pretty good.”

Brevin grinned and soon she felt his warm hand nestled in hers again. This was something she could get used to.

“Yeah but the tamales are even better.” And he guided her to the counter where he ordered for the both of them.

The rain seemed to have warmed his mood or at least taken his mind off the job.

Talia hardly ever carried money on her person since she started working in the East sector so she was grateful to know then that she'd left a handful of change in her jacket pocket the day before. She clinked them into the palm of her hand at the register but Brevin pushed it away.

"I'll take care of it." he insisted.

"I can pay for myself Brevin."

"But I don't want you to. Just call this my treat."

There was nothing for her to do because he'd already stuffed a couple dollars into the clerk's hand and was presenting her with a small, warm tamale. Talia felt as though her cheeks would burst from smiling.

Together they stood under the canopy outside the market with half a dozen others while they waited for the rain to stop and ate their tamales in the cold. Brevin kept close to Talia’s side, close enough that when more people strove to get out of the rain Talia found herself pushed against his chest. Tucked so intimately, Talia immediately thought of Jack and their first encounter in the bathroom. Brevin didn’t make a move however, to her secret disappointment. In fact he seemed embarrassed at their close proximity and spent a good minute trying to decide if he should rest his hand on her shoulder, waist or arm. In the end Talia had made the decision for him by squeezing to stand against the market window.

The beating rain finally subsided to a tolerable drizzle and Brevin was leading them back into the street.

“I think next paycheck I’ll invest in an umbrella.”

Brevin chuckled lightly. “If you find one for sale let me know. Its amazing what’s suddenly become high commodity these days.”

“Oh I’m sure I can. One of the girls I work with has a nose for the rare and unattainable.” She said thinking of Jessica.

“Really? I guess that’s the benefit of working in the East side.”

“I guess so.”

She felt him watching her from the corner of his eye as they strolled. “You really like it don’t you?”

She shrugged. “I have to. I spend most of my day there.”

“Some people are worried about that.” He said with a mischievous grin almost like Jacks.

Talia’s feet hesitated. “What do you mean ‘worried about that’?” she said, more snappy than she wanted to be around Brevin.

“Well, even the best of us quaver in the face of temptation right?”

She knew he was just teasing her but Talia’s cheeks flushed with heat. If he only knew how those words stabbed guiltily at her conscience he might have understood why she didn’t smile with him.

Brevin cleared his throat, almost irritably. “I’m only joking Talia. Who wouldn’t trust *you*. I mean, that’s why your Aunt sent you instead of Elise right? Still, it’s a dangerous area. You should be careful stuff happens there.”

He seemed to tack the last part on awkwardly.

“Stuff happens everywhere. You only need to remember the Lord is always with you.” Oh, she hated saying the words she only half believed and she knew they sprang from her lips merely to grab his attention, his admiration.

“Too true, as always.” He turned a warm smile in her direction. “That’s why everyone loves you, Talia.”

The words felt more like a sting than a compliment and not just because of the fork tongue she’d adopted but of the way Brevin had said it, almost mockingly. These feelings were forgotten when Brevin gently took her hand into his.

“I’m glad you decided to come out here with me.” He said. “Its nice to have the company after sitting alone in my Dad’s office all day.”

The tingle in her fingers at his touch spread through her limbs with his words. “Anything to be of use for the church.” She shrugged.

They arrived at the chapel building once again hand in hand but this time Brevin dropped it when they reached the front doors. He peered through the glass that still said “The People’s Bank” in white letters.

“Um, I have something I have take care of tomorrow but why don’t we meet in the same place Tuesday? Maybe the rain will have let up and we’ll get a little more done.”

“That’s perfect.” Talia said, thinking of Jack and how to explain that their play time would have to come to an immediate halt after tomorrow. She wasn’t about to give up Brevin’s hand or the friendly smile he cast her as he held the door open for her.

“Okay. Tuesday then.” He whispered as they parted to their separate pews. He stopped, faltered a little on the first words but got them out just the same. “It was fun today, Talia. Thanks.”


xxx


“You know I really thought you had more sense Talia.” Elise whispered in the dark of their shared room. “I mean, Brevin? *I’m* supposed to be the shallow one here.”

“Why are you getting so upset? Its not like we’re dating or anything. All he did was buy me a tamale.”

“He dished out money little sis, that means he’s got his sights set. And won’t his daddy be pleased to know he’s taking out the star pupil.”

Talia tossed in her bed until she was on her back. “And what’s wrong with that?”

“Whats wrong with that? Honey have you listened to a word I’ve been saying?”

“Yeah. You’re saying I should stop wanting to see someone because he happens to be the type of person you can’t stand. Someone with morals and integrity.”

Elise laughed. “You mean a hypocrite?”

“Oh sure. And aren’t you one to talk? Going to meeting every day only because you’re being forced by Aunt Alice.” Talia spat, knowing she was just the same. “I don’t know why I’m talking to you about this. Of course you’d hate the idea. We haven’t shared the same opinion for years.”

“That’s because we’re not the same people anymore.”

Talia heard Elise’s breath come in short, like a sob and the next second she was throwing away her covers and pulling her boots on.

“You’re going out again?”

“What does it look like?” Her eyes were scowling. “And you know Talia dearie, I may walk into that building with my arm twisted everyday but at least I’m honest with *myself*. Half the people in there are pretending to be someone else and believe me, your boy Brevin is one of them.”

Elise threw open the window and climbed out before Talia could say a word