What if?

A/N; Hugs for everyone who reviewed! Answers at the bottom.

Sorry for taking so long, my muse has been kind of...er... dead? lately... But here it finally is!

And once again I wanna thank teeta, who so kindly betaed my chapter!

OH and I do not own Frank Sinatra, nor his songs. Surprising, huh? ;)

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Chapter 3

Friday morning, the one morning he had waited for weeks, for months, for years? And he woke feeling absolutely terrible; his throat was sore, so sore that it actually hurt to swallow. ‘Not today,’ He thought, as he got up from the bed and got dressed, ignoring the weary, sick feeling that he had. He walked downstairs, feeling like he could faint any minute, but he was determined not to give into it. He had plans, Tony and he had plans, he’d be damned to give them up.

He could feel his mother’s eyes on him as he sat down in front of the kitchen table, opposite to his father. He didn’t say a word, no one did. Silence, just like it had been for weeks now.

His mother poured tea into his cup and when Michael glanced up he could see the worried frown on her face. The same kind of look that she had had on the night she had first seen the bruise on his face. He still wasn’t sure if they had truly believed his story of it’s origin.
“You look very pale,” she spoke, breaking the far too long lasting silence.
“I…” He tried to speak, hardly finding his voice, he had to cough… “I’m fine,” He whispered.

Evelyn shook her head, putting the kettle down. She walked back to him and placed her hand on his forehead.
“Oh my, you are burning up dear,” She gasped. Dear? She hadn’t called him that in days, Michael took note. “We need to get you back in bed,” She said firmly.
“It’s nothing, mom,” He tried to fight her, even when the room was shifting in front of his eyes. He didn’t want to be sick now, why now? Of all days?
“Henry, look at him, you tell him that he has to stay at home.” Evelyn looked towards her husband who slowly lowered the newspaper down in order to take a look of his son. He was pale, his eyes watery, he was even shivering slightly.
“Your mother is right, back to bed.” He nodded his head and continued reading the paper.

OK, and now his father was speaking to him as well? Did they not hate him after all? He wondered, feeling confused.

He didn’t have the energy to fight and with her help, he walked back upstairs, where she gently guided him to lie down.

Evelyn checked his temperature.
“103 F,” She gasped and wrapped him in blankets. “Stay in bed, sleep, you need to rest.” She said, stroking his forehead gently. It felt oddly calming, having her there, seeing how gently and lovingly she looked at him, she hadn’t looked at him like that… not since… Michael blinked, he opened his mouth slightly as to tell her that… what? That he could go to school? That he could spend the weekend with Tony? He thought about it, he really did feel ill and he knew he couldn’t do either of those things, no matter how much he wanted.

He fell back to sleep before he knew it.

**^^**^^**^^**

“Should we call a doctor, Henry? He has really high temperature, it’s only climbing up, I’m worried.” Evelyn looked at her husband nervously, who was getting ready for work. He sighed.
“It’s just flu, Evelyn, he’s a 17 year old with flu, nothing to get yourself all worked up for.” He tried to reason with her.
“Flue with almost 104 fever!” She shrieked.
“We’ll be both late for work.” He muttered while getting upstairs to his son’s bedroom, his wife following close behind.

He looked at the pale, shivering form of his son, whose eyes were closed tightly. He walked closer to touch his forehead.
“You are right, he is really burning up.” He whispered. They could take him to see a doctor, but… he really did seem too sick to be moved and… he couldn’t feel the same contempt he had before, gay or not, this was his son, the son who at the moment was quite helpless and sick.
“I can’t leave him alone like this Henry, 17 or not.”
“I’ll call the doctor,” He agreed then.

**^^**^^**^^**^^**

Tony, after getting home from school, went straight to Michael’s house. He had been worried all day, Michael seemed fine the other day and now he was sick? Tony couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed, he had waited this weekend just as much as Michael had.

“The doctor confirmed that he has influenza.” Evelyn told him once he got in.
“Can I go see him?” Tony asked.
“Sure, he was awake just moments ago.”

Tony climbed up the stairs and got into Michael’s room.
“Hi,” He whispered. Michael was laying on the bed and he really did look sick, he was so pale.
“Hi,” Michael whispered with a hoarse voice, not having the strength to lift his head up.
Tony walked closer and pulled a chair next to the bed.
“I was worried,” He told him, touching gently at his still burning cheek.
“I’m sorry…”
“Sorry? There is no reason.”
“We had plans… Now I ruined them.” Tony rolled his eyes at this.
“You are sick Michael and besides, there is no rush, when you’ve healed properly we have all the time in the world. Next weekend, I’m sure you’ll be up by then and if not, then we’ll just wait a little while longer… I can wait… we’ve waited our whole lives already, right?” He chuckled while stroking his damp hair. Michael nodded his head.
“I… had waited, I wanted… not fair…” He close his eyes.
“You just rest and get better, I promise that the waiting will be worth it, I want to make it special for you.” Tony whispered and kissed his hot skin, there was a small smile on Michael’s lips and he opened his eyes wearily.
“Thank you…” Tony looked affectionately at him, knowing that asking Michael to stay had been the best decision he could have ever made.


**^^**^^**^^**^^**

That weekend Tony spend with his older brother, but his thoughts were constantly with Michael.
“How far have you two gone?” William asked while sipping his beer in front of the TV.
“Excuse me?” Tony looked at him with a puzzled expression.
“You and little Mikey,”
“Little Mikey??”
“Aye, well he is little compared to my friend Michael, that guy is almost three times his size, so that’s why; little Mikey.” Tony stared at his brother with his mouth open.
“Ah don’t you go looking at me like that Tony, I know it’s more than friendship now. So spill it; how far?”
“I am not talking about this with you.”
“Come on Tony, I’ll keep bugging you about it until I get an answer.” Tony just glared at him. “Tell me,” William encouraged.
“He’s… we haven’t…” Tony took a sip of his own beer, it just felt so odd.
“You can bring him here, next Saturday if you’d like, I know how it’s at home, the almost non-existent amount of privacy. I can go and see one of my friend and stay at his house then.” William nodded his head, concentrating back on the TV screen.
“How can you be so natural about this?” Tony wondered out loud.
“If my brother wants to…” William glanced at him, “…be with some guy, then Michael is the best choice. “ He simply nodded.
“He’s the only one… I’ve ever… thought that way Will, only guy that is... what does that make me?”
“Don’t think so much, just go with it, if it feels right, it feels right. You have plenty of time to worry about the future later. And Tony … You are not the first man who’s seen him in that light, so just… remember that OK?”
Tony nodded his head, he knew very well that he wasn’t.

**^^**^^**^^**


It was Saturday, a week later when Tony came to pick up his friend.
“Dress warmly,” he advised him. “You’re still recovering,” Michael nodded, collecting his things together. Finally, this was the day; he had never felt quite so excited and nervous at the same time.
“Where are we going?” He asked, Tony had only told him to pack his toothbrush and whatever he needed to spend the night with. “To your place?”
“Nah, to Will’s….” Tony told him. “He won’t be home this evening…or night.” He grinned and Michael gave him a wide grin back, nodding his head. Everything was going so much better than just two weeks ago. Since his illness, he had come to realise that his mother still cared for him, and that his father didn’t hate him either, they just worried and though there was still some tension on some subjects, mainly his gayness, but nevertheless, they were still going in the right direction.

William was waiting for them outside, in his car. They got in.
“Hey Michael, all better now? I heard you had a quite nasty case of influenza.”
“Yes, I’m much better now, thank you.” He smiled.
“That is good,” Will smiled and started the engine.

**^^**^^**

“Now, I’ve hidden all the tequila, as I don’t want to find you too all wasted and throwing up all over the place, when I come back tomorrow, so no use even trying to search for it.” William grinned as he led them in. “You can have wine though, and hm… do I have anything else to tell you? Hm…well I guess not… have fun you two, I’ll make my leave.” He grinned again.
“Have fun Will, and thanks for this!” Michael smiled at the older boy.
“No problem…” He replied. “Oh and Tony, a quick word with you.” He added with a lower tone of voice. Tony stepped closer, they were still in the hall.

“Use condoms, and use lube; plenty of lube. Here I got these for you,” William handed him the small bag .Tony looked in to see the items that Will had just mentioned and blushed, it seemed terribly wrong that his brother knew of the plans he and Michael had. Before he could say anything, Will already made his leave. And with a quickly spoken bye he was gone.

“What did he give you?” Michael asked coming closer, but Tony quickly hid the bag behind his back. “It’s a surprise,” he told him and smiled. Michael raised his eyebrow with curiosity, but decided to let Tony keep his surprise.

“Are you hungry?” Tony asked.
“Yes, in fact I am.”
“I thought we could cook something.” Michael nodded and followed Tony into the kitchen. “Pasta Bolognese?” He asked, already taking out the necessary ingredients.
“Sounds good to me,” Michael nodded. “Let me make the sauce, you know how I love cooking?” He walked closer to Tony, who smiled and gave him a small kiss on his cheek.
“I can cut the onions,” he offered.

They both felt the slight tension in the air, the tension now formed between them, as their relationship had taken the step to a new and still unfamiliar territory. They found it amusing, here they were, after all this time, after all these years, suddenly feeling like… a couple on a first date. Michael glanced at Tony, saw him looking back at him and smiled.
“Here, taste it…” Michael took some sauce on a spoon and brought it closer to Tony’s mouth, who gently blew on it before taking the spoon inside his mouth. He close his eyes, tasting it.
“Mmm….” It was the only thing he could say then, completed with a blissful expression that made Michael snicker.
“I bet I can get that same moan form from your lips later too, but with even greater passion and with even greater pleasure.” Tony opened his eyes to look at him,
“Confident, aren’t we?” He grinned.
“Shouldn't I be?” Michael asked in a playful manner, Tony smiled and pulled him closer then, his hands on his waist, he laid his forehead against his and sighed, locking his eyes with his. Michael brought his lips carefully closer to kiss him, his eyes closing, his hands traveling on Tony’s strong back.
“Am I just dreaming, Tony? Is this real…” He whispered.
“Aye, it’s real, though it seems like a dream, but it’s real, you feel real, smell and taste real and my heart is beating so fast that I fear that it will soon run out of order.” Michael chuckled, kissed him once more before he willed himself to let go of Tony.
“It’s almost ready, you could set the table.” He told him. Tony sighed, nodded his head and went to fulfill his task.

They sat in front of the table, opposite to each others, with the pasta on the plates and some red wine in their glasses.
“So…” Michael started, playing with his food and glancing at Tony quickly. Suddenly it was hard to think of anything to talk about, this was all so formal, the dinner, the wine, the candle on the table.
“So…” Tony repeated, looking at the setting and his friend. “Should I turn on some music?” He asked.
“Yes, music, that sounds good.” Michael nodded, taking a sip of the wine. Tony got up and walked over to the CD player and switched it on, it was Will who had picked the music, saying he knew just what one should listen to in such occasions.

When he sat back down, it was when the first song started to play, it was Frank Sinatra; Strangers in the night. They looked at each others and started to laugh uncontrollably.
“I swear, I didn’t pick this… It was Will…” Tony tried to get some air between his laughter, Michael wiped the tears from his eyes. Then he looked at Tony seriously, taking a deep breath and taking his hand in his. He started to sing along, his other hand on his chest;

“Strangers in the night, two lonely people
We were strangers in the night
Up to the moment
When we said our first hello.
Little did we know
Love was just a glance away,
A warm embracing dance away and.

Ever since that night we've been together.
Lovers at first sight, in love forever.
It turned out so right,
For strangers in the night…”


“Oh God, stop, Michael, you’re killing me with this… I can’t… I can’t breathe…” Tony fell off his chair. Michael started laughing again.

The song changed; Fly me to the moon, and they were both still laughing.

Finally they managed to somehow control themselves back together. Tony stood up.
“My dear, shall we dance?” He asked in a very gentleman like manner and reached with his hand for him, which Michael took.
“Why, thank you sir,” They started to dance slowly, holding up small giggles.
“Your dancing is heavenly!”
“I know; I will take you to heaven my dear! You won’t be able to resist me.”
“My, my, are you just trying to get into my pants, dear sir?”
“Oh no, this is all perfectly decent, and I am a perfect gentleman, I only ask a permission to court you, my dear.”
“You will have to ask my father, if you may court me, sir.”
“Ah and I shall charm your father as well! And soon we’ll be dancing at our wedding!”

Another song; The way you look tonight.

Tony took him back to sit in front of the table, where they both took another look of the romantic setting.
“This really isn’t us Tony.” Michael said finally.
“I know,” Tony agreed.
“I wonder...” he snickered then, “please don’t tell me that the bed is covered with rose petals or something equally corny?” He looked at Tony questionably.
“Shit, wait here,” he stood up and Michael looked at him with his mouth open; did he really? But after only few steps Tony turned back and sat down laughing.
“Got you, didn’t I? Haha, you should see the look on your face.” He grinned. “Don’t worry, no rose petals.”
“Smartass,” Michael snorted, with a smile.
“Okay, let’s end this silly show?” Tony stood up again and blew the candle out. “Let’s do this our way, take your plate and your glass, we’re eating in the living room in front of the TV like couple of … well… like we would normally.” Michael nodded and collected the plate and his wine glass to follow Tony into the living room, they turned the music off and turned the TV on.

“Much better,” Michael nodded as they had their picnic on the floor. Tony looked at him and nodded his head.
“I guess I was just trying too hard, wanting to make it special.” He said.
“It is special, it will be special, our way.”

Later, after wine and dine and a movie, Tony turned on different music, romantic music, but music that he knew Michael would like as well as himself.

He took Michael’s hand and led him to the bedroom. Standing in front of it, facing each other, Tony started to take off Michael’s shirt. He brought it up slowly, kissing Michael, before he lifted the shirt up from over his head, undressing it completely with Michael’s help. He threw the piece of clothing onto the floor, where his own shirt landed soon after. He traced his fingers on Michael’s collarbone, down on his chest to his nipples.
“You are beautiful,” He breathed out and kissed his neck lovingly.
“As are you Tony,” Michael whispered, caressing his back, running his fingers up and down his spine. Tony sighed, looking deep into Michael’s eyes, before bringing his hands in front of his jeans to open them.
“Are you sure?” He asked.
“Never been surer in my life,” Michael whispered, smiled and brought his own hands to unzip Tony’s pants, this was exactly what he wanted. Tony knelled down, pulling Michael's pants down, urging him to step out of them, which he did.

Michael took a deep breath, there he was; standing naked and aroused in front of Tony, who knelled down before him, looking at him in away he had never looked at him before. And when Tony touched the tip of his erected member, he shivered and moaned from the pleasure that he felt. Tony looked up and smiled, becoming more bolder, he took Michael's cock between his lips and sucked, stroking and squeezing Michael’s buttocks at the same time. He took a moment to spit on his hand, before taking him in his mouth once more, he rubbed the spit between Michael’s buttocks, before finally; slowly and carefully, he pushed his first digit in; gods it was tight, he felt how Michael shivered at the intrusion, heard the moan that spilled from his lips. Tony looked up, seeing Michael looking back, his face flushed and beautiful, even more beautiful than before.

Michael had never felt anything that could compare to the pleasure that Tony was giving him, it felt so good that it almost hurt and a part of him wanted to ask Tony to stop because he was afraid of it in some strange way. But he let it continue, even more he wanted it to continue and then… he didn’t want it to end so soon, he was already so close, it was such a new sensation to his young body. He urged Tony to stand up and move onto the bed with him.

“Is this your first time?” Tony asked with a whisper as he gently prepared him with the lube, making sure to use plenty of it, Michael’s entrance felt so tight to him and he wondered how he’d get himself in.
“Aye, it is.” He confirmed. Tony brought his other hand on his cheek and kissed him deeply, continuing to finger him.
“Don’t worry… I’ll go slow…” He assured, sensing the slight nervousness in Michael.
“I trust you,” He whispered, they kissed again. “OK, try it,” Michael whispered finally. Tony reached for a condom and quickly slipped it on.

“How should we…” Tony started, wondering about the position. Michael lay down on his back, spreading his legs and allowing Tony to settle between them. Again he felt nervous when Toy’s erected cock nudged against his opening.
“It’s okay… relax…” Tony whispered, kissing his face lovingly as he tried to push in. He didn’t succeed, Michael was tight and Tony was afraid to hurt him, maybe it just wouldn’t fit? He wondered after some trying. He needed to make Michael relax more.

“Let’s try something different,” He suggested. Michael nodded and allowed Tony to guide him to another position, this time they lay on their sides, Michael’s back turned against Tony’s chest, Tony’s cock slowly massaging between his butt cheeks, while Tony’s hand slowly moved up and down on his shaft. Michael moaned loudly, really starting to lose himself in the sensations. He turned his head back to kiss him. Tony moved his other hand between their bodies and once again he guided his cock against the tight opening. He wrapped his arm around Michael and pulled him closer to himself, while at the same time, pushing in, and this time, his cock slid in.

Michael gasped, trembled, a small sound of pain escaped from his lips and Tony kissed his shoulder waiting patiently for Michael to get used to him, holding him, while his heart was beating fast against his ribs from the pleasure that he was in, he wanted to move, but knew that for Michael’s sake, he needed to wait.
“Are you OK?” He asked.
“Yes… It’s just… new…” Michael panted.
“If you want me to stop then tell me, OK?”
“Don’t want you to stop,” Michael assured, they kissed again, deeply, long, and slowly Tony began to move.

It felt surreal, it felt perfect, it felt… Their naked bodies wrapped closely together and all Tony could think of was that he was inside Michael, that he was making love to Michael, that he was the first to make love to Michael. He was so beautiful, every little sound he made, the way he kissed, the way he… Tony brought his hand again to stroke him, wanting to bring Michael to the same level where he was at, to the heaven that he was in.

When Michael came, when his muscles tightened around him, it was all that Tony could take and he reached his own climax. He stayed inside of Michael, trying to catch his breath, wondering what this all would mean now? There was no turning back, not after this.

Finally he pulled out, took the condom off and threw it in the nearby garbage bin, They laid side by side on the bed, Tony caressed Michael’s arm with his fingers and stared at the ceiling.
“Do you regret it?” Michael asked quietly, which took him by surprise.
“Regret it? No, heavens no, Michael… Do you?” He looked at him.
“No… It was… everything I always dreamt it to be.” Michael whispered.
“Now, why didn’t we think of this sooner?” Tony joked.
“I’m glad you came around in the end. We have lots of catching up to do.”
“Aye, we have,” Tony nodded, stroking Michael’s hair. He couldn’t help but feel the slight worry inside of him, if something was to come between them now, could they ever return to be just friends? And what about the future? As he looked at Michael, he knew he loved him, it felt right, but… To come out? To have a boyfriend? To tell his family and everyone who knew him? He wasn’t sure if he was ready for it.
“I love you, Tony,” Michael whispered, his head resting against his chest, his eyes closed.
“I love you too, Michael…” Tony answered quietly, slowly continuing to caress his naked back. He did love Michael, but was he ready, truly ready for all that it would bring?


TBC.

Review responses;

Laaerie; Thank you for listening for my ramblings earlier, I needed that, hihi *hugs*

Saminada: I’m glad you like this version! Hm, and Ricky would deserve to disappear from the face of the earth completely, sadly such persons exist…. Hope this chapter pleased you.

Madlodger; you have a bad feeling because you know my usual way all too well *grins* and knowing myself… well… *cough* Too much fluff; I’ve said it before and I say it again: eww… hihi but sometimes fluff is nice to write, this time I don’t think that I did a very good job in it, but…

Womo; Yay more sex, Michael’s cherry is gone, this time, in a nice way. And little brothers can be funny… I guess, I’ve never had one so, haha

Pyromaniacs Anonymous: Hihi, me glad you like ^_^

Teeta; This version will be better for your taste and I do hope you continue to like it! But yes you can always tell me the truth and I wouldn’t go all weird even if you’d say that you couldn’t continue reading. About William being straight or gay, hm… I shall leave that one in the dark for now, you might get to know later…hihi

Scribbles05; Hope you liked their weekend! And yes, you spelled the name correctly ^.^

SilentTears; Many seem to love William, so maybe I’ll give you more of him, we shall see. And yes, being Michael, it’s not easy…

Gothikah: Sorry to keep you waiting, I am hoping that I get my muse back in full power, he’s been tired lately, hehe. And Jamie… this time he didn’t get to ruin the mood!

Mathea; hehe glad to see you reading and as for the idea…hmm… You never know ;)