The one I love

Some times I have hatred towards Miss Swan, or should I dare call her Clare?
I can't understand why a young child like her could stay in my mind 24/7 and never bore me, or yet interest me in the first place. I know I love the expression she had on her face when I first saw her, but after that I don't see what is so special about her.

But I am occupied with her all the time as she race through my mine like a spirit that I am not allowed to touch.
I deny all of my affections I have towards her, but only to make it worse that I end up lusting for her touch by the end of the day.
She pleases me in a way that no one can understand, and she doesn't even know she is doing this to me.

~

That day, I assigned my students an outrageous assignment. I could hear people complaining and whispering to their friends about how "˜unfair' I could be. But in the end I also added that people can work with others, but in times they can come to my office and I can help them out if they needed assistance.

I made the assignment particularly for Miss Swan, for I knew she had no friends in the class room.
But she didn't looked worried at all, because she has me to come towards to for any questions. I prefer to be her lover, but for now I wanted to be anything for her except as a "˜teacher' if she pleased.


~

The office was quite busy that day, as young students came in and out to ask me questions about the assignment. Some even came in pairs so empathize that they came even if they had "˜friends' to do the assignment together, but some came alone.

It was getting late, and I my heart was gloomy as I was giving up all hope for Miss Swan to come to my office.

But I heard a small knock on the door, and a sweet voice called out for me.

"Professor? May I come in?"

I welcome the student, and sure enough, it was Miss Swan. She had a cute ribbon on her head that pulled back her long hair, which made me want to take it off of her so I can tie her up with it so she can never leave me again.

She smiled shyly as she walked in with the book in her hand. As she sat down in front of me I felt a need to reach out and grab her, just to see how she feels.

Miss Swan was a smart child, and spoke in a quiet way, but in a beautiful manner. She wouldn't look at me straight in the eyes but kept on asking me the question.

Though soon I noticed, that she always called me "˜professor,' and nothing more. And by the time she finished asking her question, I soon noticed that she doesn't remember my name.

I knew since class started its only been a month, but I felt that I was slapped in the face with two big bricks coming from opposite directions.

She didn't know me, and I am her teacher.

Miss Swan started to notice that I was acting strangely towards her, and seemed confused by not knowing what to make out of the situation.

I briefly answered her question, but looked at her and smiled as I recovered from my rage.

"So Miss Swan, how do you find the class?"

I asked casually, trying not to sound too friendly.

"I find it quite interesting. I am learning more about how the human mind works, and I think that helps the relationship that we have with other people."

As she spoke, she tangled her hair with her small pale fingers.

If only I had asked her to close the door before she came in, I would of took her right there in my arms. I would of grabbed her, and hold her till midnight in my office, than, I will take her back home with me and lock her up, and make her know who I was.

I was the one who loved her the most out of the entire universe. I worshipped her like a god, and with her existence I would not be maintained.

I surprised my self at how aroused I was with every gesture she made in the office. Even her turning her legs towards left and right was giving me a boner.

I replied as I explained that relationships were not that important when it comes to psychology, because psychology is to do with one self, but nothing more.

She seemed confused, and I knew it would. She was too naive to think to live on her own, with out a relationship. She needed someone, and in my opinion, that someone should be me.


"Clare, the school is closing in 5 minutes, we better get going."

A voice stopped our conversation, and I saw a boy standing at the door with his hand in the air showing his watch. The boy was young, probably her age, with acne on his face with ginger hair. He wasn't ugly, but certainly not attractive.

"Thank you Professor for your help. See you in class."

Miss Swan walked out as she apologized to the boy about her lateness.

I sat there in the office, pondering if I should assume that boy was her boy friend. I looked out the open door and noticed all of the other professors has already retired from their seats.

I looked at the watch and noticed that I been sitting there for 10 minutes after the couple left.

"My name is not professor...," I said to my face as I took my coat off of the coat hanger. "My name is Daniel Mcferran."

I was talking to my self, but it felt better than talking to some one who didn't even know your name when you loved them.