The Forgotten Gods

Chapter 2

Merim sat, bored out of her mind, at the banquet table; yet she appeared enraptured by everything that commanded her attention. It wasn’t she she didn’t enjoy a good conversation; it was just that the company this night spoke with little or no intelligence what so ever. While gossip was fun now and then, she did not want to dine over a room full of mostly made up accusations, bearing little if any resemblance to the truth. Everyone whose company she thoroughly enjoyed was not present this evening. Her parents dinned in her father’s quarters. Steel, her favorite sibling, and Iam, the arms master, were out in the training yards giving tests to greenlings; while Rain, her youngest bother, was out with them giving support. Someone, of the royal family, had to entertain guest that were as constant and different, as every day. This responsibility should fall on the heir, but the only thing Liel could be counted on for, was that he would get good and drunk every dinner. She wondered how it was that he held most the entire court captive. Sure, he was beautiful, but which one of her siblings wasn’t? He always got himself into trouble; he claimed no responsibilities for his actions, and to top it all off he was a lazy self arrogant, drunk. Liel feeling eyes on him, besides those adorning him already, looked Merim in the face, he gave her a charming smile and went back to his tale. Unwillingly, Merim felt the corners of her mouth twitch up into a smile. Why did, she, love him so much? Suddenly Merim found her sight blocked by a pair of hands. “Not this trick, again”
“Oh come on can’t you just play along anyway?” Merim knew that voice perfectly. “Steel, you’ve been doing this since you were like 2, who else would It be?” Steel being found out since the beginning, relented and drew his hands away to restore her vision. “Man I’m starving” He went to grab food off a platter then stopped mid air when he realized how grimy his hands were. “I need a bath”
“Yes, I actually smelled you coming before I saw you” Joked Merim. “I’ll tell you what why don’t you get a bath, and I’ll be up in a few minutes with some food. Then you can tell me how your day went” “Sounds good”

Steel went to his quarters to take a bath. He begun stripping as soon as he entered the room; continuing to do so until, fully naked, he reached the bathing room. The baths were always drawn for him by the time he made his way into his compartments; this time though seemed to be the exception. Sitting on the tile, filling up the tub, was a young boy who wore a startled expression. There eyes met for a moment before the servant quickly looked away in embarrassment. Apparently the sight of naked men embarrassed him. “I’m sorry” He mumbled “I’m new, and I’m falling behind schedule, I’m sorry” The words were spoken so quickly and quietly Steel hardly caught them. Quickly the boy shut off the water and grabbed the bath salts and perfumes and quickly threw them back where they belonged. Steel was about to tell him not to rush and that it was ok, but he wasn’t given a chance as he ran out the door, into the other compartments, as fast as he could. Steel was left in the room alone, with his head turned toward the door. How strange, he thought, why should a boy be embarrassed of a naked anatomy that he himself possessed? Oh well. He stepped into the bath, settling him self into a comfortable position. Within a few minutes Jei, his personal assistant walked in, carrying a basket of soaps, lathers, and fluffy soft towels. “Did you get to see the new chamber boy?” Jei asked while lathering up a washing cloth, since steel preferred to bathe himself. Except for his shoulder length hair, that he liked being washed by someone else. “I did, quite a little beauty, so why did you bring him up” “no reason really, except that he hasn’t gotten used to the schedule yet”
“Of what matter is that, it isn’t unusual to make mistakes when you’re new”
“Well apparently his mistakes have led him to be seen by many noble folk, a handful of folk had already asked lord Mercolis if they might have him for a gift”
“Well a pretty face will do that, what did my father say?”
“That he came here free born none will have him by contract unless he consents”
“Lucky for him, but I guess a lot of people went left empty handed”
“Oh yes, one of them being your brother”
“Liel?”
“That’s right”
“Good, serves him right. I’m sick of that jerk getting everything and everyone he wants. It’s about god damned time he got told no. I want to hear the whole damned thing, I suppose you know it”
“Of course, what good is a servant without ears?”
“That’s why I love you Jei”
“Your brother had overheard, another petitioner for the boy, apparently he already knew of him. So, of course this is something he wanted, had been waiting for, in his mind something he rightfully deserved, especially since he had been made to wait. Liel already had heard the outcome, but you know Liel, thinks he’s better than everyone else. As it turned out, Prince Mercolis would give him no more than anyone else asked for. You should have seen what happened next. Your brother was furious; I’d never seen him that angry before. Just like some spoiled brat, he broke everything on his way back to his high princely chambers.”
Steel laughed at the story, thoroughly enjoying the recapturing of the days earlier events. He was about to motion for Jei to start on his hair when his only sister entered the room, with a trey of food, and a flask of wine. Jei knowing how he liked time alone with his sister respectfully withdrew.

Merim took the lathering soap, and fell in where Jei had left off. She put her feet in the tub, her legs resting on both sides of Steels frame. She ran her ringers though his hair, taking care to be gentle. He had such thick hair, she loved touching it. Steel had closed his eyes, enjoying his sister’s touch. She had strong hands yet a gentle touch. Moans of pleasure escaped his throat as she continued massaging his scalp. Merim giggled at his moans, she remembered when they were little, and still taking baths together. Even then he loved his hair being washed, he would often ask his nanny to do it twice. Of course that meant she had seen his naked, still did, and often at that. Now that they were older and both held responsibilities it seemed this was some of the only time they had to spend together alone. She found it odd though that her brother should be aroused at having his hair washed. Still, she was sure that it was not because of her, it was probably just a reaction to something he loved the feel of. She focused her attention to finishing up the job she had started. “So how was practice with the new recruits?”
“The same as usual, I spend the first half trying to convince them that I am there comrade and not some heartless jerk there to beat there face in”
“Does it work?”
“Oh eventually, they end up coming to me about everything, even after they have moved on to different training masters. I don’t mind really”
“You’re very sweet; you give those boys more then just a lesson. You practically give them your heart”
“I’m not sweet; I only think it’s fair that I try to give them the best life possible, many of them won’t live to a prospering old age”
“I’m sorry”
“No need for apologies I’m not angry with you, just the situation. Many of these boys did not choose to be in this situation. I mean there family gets money when there boys are chosen for the militia. And will continue to do so even after they are dead. They willingly send there sons to death. It just seems the fighting never ends, there will never be peace.”
Merim wondered if he meant for the young recruits or for himself.

Steel pulled himself from the tub, and lay himself down on a towel that Merim had spread out on the floor. Her brothers Stomach down, Merim dried off his back, then drizzled massaging oils unto it and began rubbing her hands into his broad backside. Propped on his elbows he ate some of the food she had brought for him. They were silent while she worked the kinks out of his back, until she motioned from him to flip over so she could get the rest. Next she massaged his legs. He had to concentrate all his will on not becoming excited. It was becoming harder every day to ignore his attraction to her. She looked up at him and smiled. He just wanted to grab her shoulders and taste her mouth. Steel looked away from his older sibling, not wanting her to see the lust in his expression. She moved her hands up to his inner thighs and worked the tense muscles. He bit his lip, and clenched his fist it was just too much, he sat up abruptly “Enough” Startled Merim fell back casing her skirts to ride up and expose leg. Her sweet face mirrored confusion, even this display made a fire burn in his groin. “I am tired, I’m sorry” he turned from his sister, exposing his backside to her.
“Ok” She gathered the near empty tray of food, but when she grabbed for the bottle he told her to leave it. With that said she left him to himself. Alone he opened the flash of wine and took a heavy draught. “This isn’t right” he told himself. Brothers do not love there sisters. It was wrong and beyond that point it was sick. Why did he have to love her, like this anyway? When did this start, and why. Was it because she was the only person in his family that seemed to care for him? Was it her love for life, and her fspirspirit that attracted him? Was it her laugh, those eyes that smile…? “Stop” he yelled at himself “please just stop it” He said again a little more desperately. Even more than the thought of it being wrong that bothered him was that if she had found out she would stop loving him. A brotherly love was better than no love which was why he could not let her find out- ever. He frowned looking down at his erection, how had it gone so wrong.

Merim sat on her bed and hugged her knees to her chest. Why had her brother yelled at her so? She relayed theningning with him over and again in her head. Had she done something to upset him, she couldn’t stand the thought of her brother being mad at her. She would keep his affections, if she had had fallen out of his favor she would find a way to regain it. There were few people whom really mattered to her, and her dearest steel was one of them. Today had ended badly, but tomorrow was another day. Yes, tomorrow she would seek him out and she would fix things.

Lotus listened quietly to the other noises in the room, quiet gossiping, snoring, laughing, kissing… and many others. Lotus thought of the one room apartment his mother and he had shared. He missed it, he missed his mother. He was scarred here, he was alone here. The youth shut his eyes against the oncoming tears, he wanted to go home. But that room was not his home anymore, nor was his mother. This place, this… dark, crowded, smelly, dingy cell, this was his home now. It didn’t feel like it though, wasn’t home somewhere you felt loved and safe? Lotus pulled the sheets over his head as if to shut out the atrocthatthat was his home. He hated this place: he hated the work, he hated the people, he hated being made to feel as is he was worth less than others just because of the womb he was birthed from, and most of all he hated the eyes on him. So many eyes, both male and female, had invaded his body. He hated the way they seemed to be… apprising him. A few of them had been bold enough to lightly touch him. A fleeting touch of his hair, a brief contact of skin when hands passed objects, a finger traced over his shoulder, face, and chest, why did they have to do this? They had no right to touch him. It felt like they were trying to take something that didn’t belong to them. It made him uncomfortable; it took all his reserve not to recoil from the oncoming advancements. For the first time, since the night when he had meet Liel, he thought of the prince. Again just as the first night lotus could picture his face perfectly, in his mind the prince seemed to be smiling just for him alone and those blue eyes threatened to engulf his soul. Upon working at the castle, Lotus had become very familiar of tales about the tall prince. Lotus had of course not known when he had meet Liel that he was a prince. The thought of this made lotus smile, he alone of everyone in this hall had been the only one to look the prince eye to eye. Lotus did not know why this delighted him, but he did not care. There was not much here to make him happy, so what if he had this one thing. He was glad although that Liel was not one of his charges. He enjoyed thinking of the prince, but more than anyone Liel frightened him. All these emotions from just one meeting, how is it that Liel held so much control over his emotions and the prince himself had no idea. The young servant feel asleep dreaming of the crown prince as did half the kingdom.

Andora, better known as the white doe, kept company in one of her lovers’ sitting rooms. Here she sat often, entertaining many a noble guest. Today, though, she sat with her hot headed son Liel; the personal favorite of her boon. She listened calmly while her son complained about the new servant that had been denied to him. “It’s not fair; I am the crown prince for crying out lou ask ask for very little.” “My dearest child” his mother began, whilst pouring tea for the both of them; her long elegant fingers, almost matching the color of the bone china tea pot. “I’m afraid your father is right” As expected, she waited patiently as he expressed his outrage. “He is soon to be king, he could bend the rules if he wanted to, he just chooses not to. He revels in making things as difficult as possible for me.”
“Yes, it is true, as heir he can bend any rule to his fancy; but if he did that he would be breaking the laws that he and his ancestors have put in place to keep order. How can he expect any one to abide by his laws if at every whim and fancy he breaks them himself? He is the model to all others. Do not be angry at your father for this, my love.”
“Then your telling me that there is nothing to be done about this” his vivid eyes searched deploringly into his mothers face.
“He is just a servant, darling”
“Yes, by title, but he is much more to me” Liel’s beautiful face held a tortured look, as he spoke longingly of the boy “I can’t forget him, it’s like he has me captive, which upon our first meeting he attached an invisible line to my heart” His mother cocked an eyebrow, quite comical looking, as she had a strong reserve over her facial expressions. “Are you sure it is your heart, that longs for him and not something else” Liel smiled beautifully at his mother. “I always thought that went hand in hand” Just as fast as it had come, the smile that had played across his features vanished. “Please mother I need him”
“He is not mine to give” they remained silent for a minuet; her large dark eyes, the only emotion that changed on her perfect mask. Only those who knew her very well could decipher her emotions. Liel could see that she was considering something, calculating. He stayed quiet, letting her be the first to speak. “He is freeborn, and not of contract to anyone. Younot not need papers to own him. If you want him no one can give you him except for the boy himself”
“And how am I supposed to do that”
“Like anything else you have ever wanted… take it”
Liel contemplated this for a moment, until he caught on to what his mother suggested.
“Well mother, thank you very much” He got up and kissed her cheek. As he reached the door his mother called out to him.
“Where are you heading to?”
“To take what I want, I’m going to have a talk with that slimy bastard Eric” his mother merely nodded her head, acknowledging comprehension. She smiled as she the tea cup touched her lips, knowing she had one over on Mercolis. He had rejoiced in the fact that he could hide behind legality, to hold back from Liel. In the end though she always won, her baby would have his way.

Lotus woke up as usual, normally raised by the sounds of the other servants getting ready for the day. As with the usual routine he went to relieve himself. The communal bath house was used by all servants and not separated by houses, as were the sleeping quarters. It was still dark as he made his way there. The days were warm, but as early as it was, chill moisture clung to the air. The bath house was two stories, separated by floors for males and females. On the side of the large bleak building were steps that led up to the top floor, it was these he took. The first half of the floor was the baths, large pools of running water. Already there were boys and men of all ages, cleaning up for the start of there day. Often Lotus would scarf down his first meal and run here to bathe, as most of the servants bathed either upon waking or before slumber. He hated to bathe in front of others, hated how he was looked at. The next room was the toilets, these, thankfully, were separated by panels, and the fronts with curtains. Here he relieved him self.
His stomach growled, as he made his way to the store houses. The store house was where all the supplies for the servants were kept. The structure was actually part of the main holding, which would be entered through a series of back doors, as well as one leading to the kitchen. The store house was almost as large as the castle itself, since everything was kept here, from food stores, to clean linens and towels. All servants wore a leather band around there wrist with a colored swatch of fabric that ran through it, which signified which house they belonged to, and what there duties were. As they passed though the large double doors, they would flash there wrist to the guards, allowing them entrance to the holding. This was a sort of security measure, making sure that people denied access to the main holding could not enter. Two lines formed on either side, orderly kept making sure no one snuck in. The lines moved efficiently and quickly as to not delay the servants to keep them from there work. L fac face was already well known and he could pass without flashing his wrist, but he did so anyway as not to draw more attention. He walked by throwing up his wrist to show the leather, with a deep blue intertwined. He heard his name called by the guard and turned his head back to look at him. The guard on duty was Saimeng, he motioned that Lotus should come to him. He wondered if he should heed the gesture, after a moment’s hesitation he decided to walk back through the door to him. Saimeng was, after all one of the only guards that lotus knew that didn’t look after him as he walked by. If he had something to say to him it must be important. “Yes” Asked lotus as he stood in front of the young guard, studying his face as he did so. Saimeng had a pale pinkish sort of skin, his lips and cheeks were a sort of red that Lotus had never seen naturally. The hair that topped his head was an unruly mass of red curls. The first time Lotus had seen him he had thought that his mother most have been a Fire demon. He had an unnatural tallness, his limbs slim and sinewy, a sight that was all together quite frightening. Lotus had been afraid of him at first, but he had taken a liking to him, for his stature put the other guards on there best behavior. This meant that there were no catcalls yelled at to him when he walked by. In fact Lotus found himself looking to see if Saimeng was on duty when he walked though.
Saimeng looked down at the younger boy. “Eric wishes to speak to you before you get to your errands”
“What does he want to see me for?”
The Solider shrugged his shoulders “I’m afraid I wouldn’t know, best to ask him yourself”
Lotus nodded his head. He walked though and store house, and the kitchens. In a hall way outside of the kitchen that led to many other passageways, to where Eric’s office was. He remembered it looking so differently the first time he had walked though here, then again familiarity often changed one’s perception of things. He entered after knocking on the door and hearing Eric’s permission to enter.
“Hello Lotus, I hope to hear everything is going well with you”
“Yes, fine, thank you”
“Good, good, glad to hear it” Hesitation. Neither of them said anything. Lotus noticed a dark bruise on one of Eric’s portly cheeks. Eric must have known he was looking as it, because as he begun to speak he unconsciously rubbed his hand over it.
“I am dropping one of your charges” am I in trouble thought Lotus, had he done something to displease on of his patrons? Would he be punished “Have I done something wrong” He asked, worry tinting his voice.
“What? No, my boy I have another charge you, much more important to be taken care of” Eric waited for him to say something, but apparently he was not going to speak. So he continued.
“Well you have much to do so I will not detain you here any longer. Your new charge is his highness prince Liel. That’s it you are dismissed” lotus stood there wide eyed. Prince Liel. “There must be some mistake”
“No, no mistake”
“…I can’t”
“Don’t be absurd, of course you can, you did fine with all your charges, now run along” when Lotus didn’t move Eric stood up and took him by the shoulders and walked him out. Once he had him outside, Eric walked back into his office and slammed the door behind him.
Slowly Lotus made his way back to the store house to get his suppli
L
Lotus, already behind on his morning work slipped silently into prince Liel’s room, he dared not look at the prince. He walked instead though the chambers, and into the bathing suite. He turned on the faucet, and ran his hands under the water until a comfortable temperature warmed his fingers. As the pool filled, he laid fresh towels down, and removed the soiled ones into a basket. Next he cleaned the ceramic plate that lay next to the bath, which was used to place bath items on. In the corner of the room, as similar with all bathing rooms stood a cabinet, usually made of glass, this one was no different. They were beautifully crafted; pictures and scenes were artistically etched into the smooth panels. They came in clear shades of white, brown, grey and obsidian, this one though held a color unlike any he had ever seen. The glass was a perfect, emerald green, not unlike the color of his eyes. The cabinet blended in naturally with the many live greens that decorated all the noble bathing chambers. He studied the art that adorned the glass. The bottom and top were etched with forest scenes with fei folk scattered about, while the middle was left untouched. As he examined the glass he became aware of his reflection in the glass. He didn’t look in mirrors often, and when he did he was always surprised at the way he looked. Somehow when he pictured himself he always imagined himself as humble, but the self image looking back at him was exquisite. Unconsciously he raised his hand to the glass to touch his own reflected face. “Beautiful isn’t it” Lotus whirled around, heart racing, expecting to find Liel, but no. The intruder gasped upon seeing the boys face, quickly the shock was replaced by a smile. “Well you are Beautiful aren’t you?”
“Excuse me? Who are you anywa
“
“Well, well, well, full of questions aren’t we, and a presumptuous little prick at that. As a personal assistant I am your senior, eyes down, unless I command your attention.” Abashed Lotus did as he was told.
“I suppose you’ll need to know what the prince prefers, for future reference. He walked by Lotus to open the doors to the emerald cabinet. “My name by the way is Jian” He begun pulling bottles and packages from the shelves. “The master likes his water scented, so make sure to put these scented salts into the bath. The soaps and oils as well should be matched by scent.” The scent of all the items wafted his senses; it was a spicy yet sweet smell, like cinnamon and apples. Thinking of Liel, this scent would automatically be linked to him in his head. More objects were laden into his arms, a brush, mirror, perfumes, and other such odds and ends. All of these, he placed on the ceramic plate, in a neat and orderly fashion. Jian poured the salts and perfumes into the water, all the while taking turns in between his job and looking at lotus. “Lotus who are your parents?” Lotus, perplexed, forget his etiquette and looked into Jian’s pondering face. “My mother is Kaila, a common born woman.”
“And your father”
“I don’t have one”
“Deceased?”
Lotus looked away, to turn off the running water, his only response to his senior, was a shrug of the shoulders.
“A love child then, I suppose?
“My mother never spoke of him”
“You never asked; were you never curious?”
Lotus shook his head, no.
Jian stared at him scrutinizing.
“It’s just that… well no, couldn’t be… Then again it’s not impossible”
Lotus began to become impatient; he had much more work to be done “Is that all”
Jian waved him off, obviously still thinking of something. “Yes, whatever” Lotus made his way back through the rooms.
As he walked though the sleeping chamber, he couldn’t help but take a look at the prince. Liel’s long black hair was spread out over the pillows. His one arm draped over his chest, the other was extended out above him, elbow bent at the head board. He was so beautiful. Louts crept out not wanting to give a chance to confrontation. He only wanted to be an observer, he wanted no actual part in his life, or so he thought.

It was early morning, and a chill hung in the air, that would be replaced soon by the warmth of the sun. As Merim walked to the training yards she could hear the din of metal against metal, orders being issued by the arms master, and the hollering and cheering of comrades. Besides the sounds of practice, the morning held aromas of the cooking breakfast that wafted into the air from the kitchens. The Estate was speckled with buildings, stables, gardens that were all placed in the middle of rolling green pastures. Green dense forests lined the lush grasses. All of this was shrouded by the immense walls that made the royal grounds it own safe little city. This was home, Merim smiled to her self as she neared the training yard. Iam leaned on the outer wall to the armory, watching his two best pupils, duke it out, for learning purposes of course. Iam talked the whole time as the two comrades danced the elegant yet dangerous art of swordplay, each one lithely trying for victory. The arms master spoke to the young soldiers, poin out out, stances, moves, body movement, and the occasional mistake. The students of war, stared at there lesson intensively; and why not the older soldiers, moved fluidly and gracefully. One could easily forget they were watching a mock battle of death, and lose themselves in the exotic dance for life. Merim went to stand next to her youngest brother, whom was always there to support his child hood friend, Saimeng. He, like every one else was enraptured. She too watched the sport. Steel and Saimeng moved in circles around one another, they looked like gods. Steel with his blond hair and tan skin looked as a sun god, while Saimeng played the part of a god of destruction threatening to engulf all in fire. He had blood red hair, and his pale skin made his red lips and cheeks all the more bright. There eyes watched each other intently, parrying, thrusting and calculating; Blue eyes of the sun and amber yes of fire. Sadly though the fight did not last much longer, Saimeng was late for a blocking par. This unbalance caused him to become unsteady on his feet, and this one short moment left him open for an attack. Steel wasted no time. He turned swiftly and gracefully kicked, his red headed fd ind in the chest. Saimeng stumbled backward and fell back first onto the ground, adversary’s blade pressed to his throat. Iam’s voice rang out “End”. “Well I never could beat you” said the red head, good naturedly. “And you never will” Steelliedlied, laughing while extending his hand to his fiend.
As the young soldiers fell in to stances for practice, Steel and Saimeng walked towards the royal siblings. Rain, his long snowy hair trailing behind him, met Saimeng halfway. “Oh Sai, you were wonderful, I think you almost beat him this time.” “You think so?” Samisen’s natural blush deepened with the complement. Steel laughed “yes perhaps next time you’ll beat me, with a little luck. Perhaps a kiss from an admirer is just what you need” If possible Sai’s blush colored even deeper, “shut up you jerk, or I swear I’ll ram my sword up your back end” Steel feigned surprise, “I knew your preferences, but really I’m your best friend.” Rain hit his older brothers arm “leave him alone you big bully”. “Oh really and just what are you going to do about it” rain squealed as his brother picked him up by the waist, and spun around with him. “Stop” cried Rain, laughing “you’re making me dizzy”. “Oh alright” Steel put his brother down, and Saimeng had to catch him before he fell over, unsteady from dizziness. Merim took this moment to speak to her brother. “Steel could we take a walk” Steel looked at her for a moment unsure, of what to say, Merim feared he would, decline, but finally after what seemed an eternity he answered. “Yes”
They walked through one of the many gardens in silence, neither one wanting to be the first to speak. Steel stopped as his sister stared at one of the fountains; he remained standing as she sat at its base. “I don’t think you have ever been this quite around me” she laughed nervously. “No I don’t suppose I have” he answered not looking at her, absent mindedly pulling the leaves off of a leafy plant. His eyes widened as she took his hands in hers. “Please then I beseech you tell me why” she looked, deploringly up into his face; her eyes searching his for any readable emotions. It pained her to see his expression so desperate. His hands clenched hers harder, as if seeking solace. “My sister, my sweet Merim I wish I could tell you, it it would ease many an ache, but I fear that if I tell you I would find my self out of your good graces forever, and that I could not bear.” Her features changed to that of comfort. “There is nothing you could tell me that could make me ever think less of you, of this I can promise.”
“So you say, and I believe that you speak truly, but only because you do not know, nor could ever guess of what it is that I would tell you”
“Oh brother I swear, whatever it be, mve fve for you would be no less.” At this he ripped his hands away, and began pacing.
“Merim, I wish at this moment I were anyone but me. My birth should have been to someone else, to anyone else, then I could have a glimmer of hope, at least then it would not be wrong.” He stopped pacing, his back to her. He was surprised when he felt his sister’s arms embrace him, he could hear her slight sniffs, and he knew she was crying. His arms slack he threw his head back to the heavens and closed his eyes. “Why is it you say this hurtful thing? Why wish that you could have been born to another family, do you not love us? Do you not love me?” Steel felt like he too would soon shed tears. He turned around to return her embrace. “No Merim it is in fact my love for you that plagues me.” She looked up at him tears still glimmering wetly upon her face. “I don’t understand”, “it is better that you don’t” he said wiping away her tears. As he did so she leaned into his caress. “I want to, help me to understand” “I cannot, if you only knew what you were asking me you would regret it” “please” she whispered “if I do not know, I may be as consumed by it as you are and never being any the wiser of why.” He leaned his forehead against hers “if you hate me, I will understand” Merim felt as if the world was falling in around her as her brother’s lips met hers. He was right when he had said she could not have guessed what it was that plagued him. She was confused and scared, yet she let the kiss continue. She allowed him the intimacy of the entrance of his tongue. Like a frightened child she pushed more closely to him, digging her nails into his flesh, as he explored the cavern of her mouth. The exchange was gentle yet deep. When it ended and he had released her they stood looking at one another both frightened of what had happened and what was yet to come. “Merim, I love you… I’m sorry” Merim pushed her stray curls behind her ears. “I… we are siblings… I don’t know what to say to do… I’m so confused” “Say no more” Steel croaked out “I know it was wrong, I’m sick… and I’m sorry I shouldn’t have, its just… God Merim… I’m sorry” he stared at his feet. “I’m sorry” he whispered and with that he turned and left. Merim stared after him for some time, then fell to her knees, her face in her hands and she wept. Tears fell, for herself and for her brother and for the hopelessness of it all. “What do I do” she cried to herself. She prayed silently to the brother for guidance, surely incest, would be cause for the father’s punishment. But she loved steel how far was one love from another, where was the boundaries between sibling love, and romantic love. She would do anything for her brother was not that more than some people would do for there lovers. But she was his sister; incest was wrong, but by whose standards? “What will I do, what will become of us?”

Erion stood at the doors of the cathedral, saying farewells to the worshippers as they left the early morning mass. Finally when all the children of the goddess had emptied out, he made his way to help Linis, the head priest and royal advisor, clean up and prepare for the next mass. “Here let me help” Said Erion as he took the heavy mass book from his arms to place it on the shelf. “May the Mother bless ye my boy” replied his senior, as he sat on a chair, all the bones in his body audibly creaking as he did so. Erion gave the advisor a worried look, he was not young any more and every day his health seemed to deteriorate a little bit more. “Now, now” said the old priest “I’ll be just fine all I need is a little rest so you can stop making those faces at me” “I’ am most sorry my Excellency, it’s just that I just don’t know what I would do with out you. And it’s not just me; the kingdom would be at a great loss without your wisdom. I would just like it if you didn’t push yourself so hard.” The old man chuckled “you nor the kingdom have nothing to worry about, if the Mother chooses to take me into her embrace I know that the all would be safe in your hands.”
“You give me far too much credit.”
“And you underestimate your self. I have taught you everything I know. You are as humble as any priest I know. And contrary to many of the other older priests I think that your youth will give the job of first minister the freshness that it has been lacking.”
“I thank you for your faith in me, even if I am undeserving, but I hope for the sake of the kingdom, that there is some truth to your words”
“Have faith my boy, and you will find that everything will work out just fine. You will see.” Erion gave the priest a half smile and shrugged his shoulders there was nothing really that he could say. Still, though, the older man needed a rest before the night’s service.
“You look tired perhaps I could at least beg that I take you to your chambers.
“That, my lad, seems a good idea. I am no longer as I used to be.”
“No” smiled the youth “but in that there is no shame”

Upon returning to the alter room, Erion found the distressed princess waiting for him. At first she didn’t see him. She was sitting on the steps leading up to the alter. Her head was rested upon folded arms, her face hidden by a mass of unruley brown curls. Erion would not have known that there was something a matter had he not seen her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. Without a word he sat beside her and put his hand on her shoulder to let her know he was there. Upon his touch she raised her face to look at him. Her pretty brown eyes were brimming with tears. “Erion” she cried, “I have sinned horribly” The young priest looked at her perplexed, how bad could it be? For it to bring her to tears like this it would have to be big, she was not one to easily upset. She although was one of the most honest people he knew, he doubted it was her fault. “Shhh, now tell me what has got you all upset” he was little surprised when she leaned into his chest to weep. He put his hands though her hair, trying to console her. He did this for what seemed to be hours, before he felt her trembling stop. Finally she looked into his face again. “I… I was kissed by someone.” Erion smiled at her, so this was it? He knew she was a little naïve “I was kissed by Steel.” His smile on his face quickly transformed, his expression was that of startlement.
“Princess is is not your sin, it is steel’s”
“No, I am as much to blame as he is.”
“Hush, listen, you must tell this to no one. This sin is a dark one, for that which the Father would greatly punish you for if you died today. You must repent and ask for strength from the Son. Never shall you let happen again, nor go any further.”
Merim shook her head lightly.
“Oh brother I knew you would give me wise counsel” She spoke the memorized words out of routine of penance; she only hoped that she would heed his advice. Outside the temple the skies turned a stark shade of grey.

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