Love, Lose, Live
folder
Original - Misc › -Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
20
Views:
2,854
Reviews:
16
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Original - Misc › -Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
20
Views:
2,854
Reviews:
16
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
If this resembles anyone, dead, alive or otherwise, it is purely coincidental.This is a work of fiction. I, the author, hold exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited
Chapter Seventeen
Been awhile since I've written anything but here you go!!
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I get up feeling rested for the first time in a very long time. I go downstairs and decide to cook breakfast for the first time in a while. I look in the fridge what ingredients I have and realize I can make omelets and bacon. Sounds like a plan. I go over to the stove and start it up ready for the delicious food to come. I think James likes omelets but I really don’t know. Oh well, more for later if he doesn’t. After placing a skillet on the stovetop, I go back to the fridge and grab eggs, peppers, onions and the bacon. After a moment over trying to figure out how in God’s name I’m going to chop these ingredients I remember that Brian got one of those food processor things. It takes me a moment to find it but once I do, the task is done incredibly fast. I crack the eggs into the skillet and then drop the onions and peppers on top. I get another skillet going and start the bacon. It takes maybe another five minutes to finish off both the omelets and the bacon. I’m starting the coffee and plating the food when James wanders into the kitchen rubbing grit out of his eyes.
“You made breakfast?”
“Yeah. Omelets with onions and peppers and you can get some cheese out of the fridge. There’s bacon too and the coffee is almost done.”
“This may have just made my year. I’ve tried to cook breakfast foods but like baking, I’m just not good at it.” James walks over and sits down.
“Creamer and sugar?” James nods and after I mix in both the cream and sugar, I bring him his coffee and sit down to my food. I feel good. I missed doing this with Brian and I’m glad that James and I can share a meal. When I’m finished eating, I get up and start on the dishes from today and last night. James finishes and puts his dishes in the dishwasher and starts it up. Together, we wash, dry and put the dishes away. “I’m gonna go upstairs and paint. Do you wanna come see where I paint?” I ask somewhat nervously. The only person who’d ever been up there with me was Brian.
“Sure. I’d love to.” James gives me a big smile and I lead him up the stairs.
“I actually paint in that little observatory on top of the house. It gets the most natural light for the longest amount of time.” I get to the door of my painting area and I hesitate for a second before I open it and lead James inside. I haven’t been inside since Brian died and I forgot how packed the place is. I have paintings, paints, canvases, brushes and a plethora of other art supplies everywhere. I have a half finished painting up on the easel and just seeing it almost makes me cry. “I was working on that picture of Brian when he passed. I plan on finishing it. Today hopefully.”
“I thought I did a lot of work with my photography but you have so much work in here.”
“Yeah. I’ve sold a lot or give it away too. I ran out of room a few years ago and the walls couldn’t take any more so I started selling pieces. I have one of you in here. I mean, you’re in a couple of them but there is one of just you. Let me see if I can find it.” I start to filter through all the paintings I have laying around. I finally find the painting of James. “You were teasing Brian when I committed this to memory. You looked genuinely and completely happy and I wanted to paint it so that it would last forever.”
James takes the painting, “this is amazing Lucas. It really is. I didn’t know I could look like this.”
“Well you did. At least, that’s what you look like to me.” He hands me back the painting and I put it away. “I’m gonna work on the Brian painting. You can stay if you want.”
“I’ll be right back with a book in tow and then I’ll stay up here with you.” I smile at James before he walks off. I then get my paints together to continue with my painting. I sit down and hear James walk back in. He sits off to my left and I start to paint. It feels good. It feels good to paint again and I feel my heart ease some as I paint in Brian’s eyes. Some of my sadness has melted away when I finish the painting two hours later. I look over at James and see he’s asleep.
I wake him up saying “the painting is finished if you want to see it.”
“Yeah. Let me get up.” James rises and stares at my painting.
His staring is starting to make me nervous. “Do you like it?”
“It looks just like him. It really does. Is this how he looked at you?”
“Yeah. This is the look that made me happy. The one that made me feel like I was the center of the universe. I knew without a doubt that he loved me because of these looks.” I’m smiling now even as tears slide down my face. “I miss him. I miss these looks.”
“I miss him too Lucas but you’ll never forget these looks. Even if you didn’t have this painting, you’d have the memory.” We smile at each other and then turn back to the painting, remembering our dear friend.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I get up feeling rested for the first time in a very long time. I go downstairs and decide to cook breakfast for the first time in a while. I look in the fridge what ingredients I have and realize I can make omelets and bacon. Sounds like a plan. I go over to the stove and start it up ready for the delicious food to come. I think James likes omelets but I really don’t know. Oh well, more for later if he doesn’t. After placing a skillet on the stovetop, I go back to the fridge and grab eggs, peppers, onions and the bacon. After a moment over trying to figure out how in God’s name I’m going to chop these ingredients I remember that Brian got one of those food processor things. It takes me a moment to find it but once I do, the task is done incredibly fast. I crack the eggs into the skillet and then drop the onions and peppers on top. I get another skillet going and start the bacon. It takes maybe another five minutes to finish off both the omelets and the bacon. I’m starting the coffee and plating the food when James wanders into the kitchen rubbing grit out of his eyes.
“You made breakfast?”
“Yeah. Omelets with onions and peppers and you can get some cheese out of the fridge. There’s bacon too and the coffee is almost done.”
“This may have just made my year. I’ve tried to cook breakfast foods but like baking, I’m just not good at it.” James walks over and sits down.
“Creamer and sugar?” James nods and after I mix in both the cream and sugar, I bring him his coffee and sit down to my food. I feel good. I missed doing this with Brian and I’m glad that James and I can share a meal. When I’m finished eating, I get up and start on the dishes from today and last night. James finishes and puts his dishes in the dishwasher and starts it up. Together, we wash, dry and put the dishes away. “I’m gonna go upstairs and paint. Do you wanna come see where I paint?” I ask somewhat nervously. The only person who’d ever been up there with me was Brian.
“Sure. I’d love to.” James gives me a big smile and I lead him up the stairs.
“I actually paint in that little observatory on top of the house. It gets the most natural light for the longest amount of time.” I get to the door of my painting area and I hesitate for a second before I open it and lead James inside. I haven’t been inside since Brian died and I forgot how packed the place is. I have paintings, paints, canvases, brushes and a plethora of other art supplies everywhere. I have a half finished painting up on the easel and just seeing it almost makes me cry. “I was working on that picture of Brian when he passed. I plan on finishing it. Today hopefully.”
“I thought I did a lot of work with my photography but you have so much work in here.”
“Yeah. I’ve sold a lot or give it away too. I ran out of room a few years ago and the walls couldn’t take any more so I started selling pieces. I have one of you in here. I mean, you’re in a couple of them but there is one of just you. Let me see if I can find it.” I start to filter through all the paintings I have laying around. I finally find the painting of James. “You were teasing Brian when I committed this to memory. You looked genuinely and completely happy and I wanted to paint it so that it would last forever.”
James takes the painting, “this is amazing Lucas. It really is. I didn’t know I could look like this.”
“Well you did. At least, that’s what you look like to me.” He hands me back the painting and I put it away. “I’m gonna work on the Brian painting. You can stay if you want.”
“I’ll be right back with a book in tow and then I’ll stay up here with you.” I smile at James before he walks off. I then get my paints together to continue with my painting. I sit down and hear James walk back in. He sits off to my left and I start to paint. It feels good. It feels good to paint again and I feel my heart ease some as I paint in Brian’s eyes. Some of my sadness has melted away when I finish the painting two hours later. I look over at James and see he’s asleep.
I wake him up saying “the painting is finished if you want to see it.”
“Yeah. Let me get up.” James rises and stares at my painting.
His staring is starting to make me nervous. “Do you like it?”
“It looks just like him. It really does. Is this how he looked at you?”
“Yeah. This is the look that made me happy. The one that made me feel like I was the center of the universe. I knew without a doubt that he loved me because of these looks.” I’m smiling now even as tears slide down my face. “I miss him. I miss these looks.”
“I miss him too Lucas but you’ll never forget these looks. Even if you didn’t have this painting, you’d have the memory.” We smile at each other and then turn back to the painting, remembering our dear friend.