Best Friends Means you Pull the Trigger

Fourteen

Michael took a quick shower after practice, and ignoring his teammates, he hurried to his car. He missed Gerald, he had only seen him in the morning, shared that small smile with him, and now all he wanted was to have Gerald in his arms. He wanted a kiss, he needed a kiss. Just thinking about Gerald smiling against his lips, softly melting into his arms, made him press on the accelerator a little bit more.

He hurried into the coffee shop, happy to see it was empty. Gerald was cleaning behind the counter, and Michael ran towards him jumping right over the counter startling Gerald, who dropped the broom in his hands.

Gerald didn’t have time for more than a gasp, because Michael’s arms were around him and he was lost in a kiss. Michael’s arms moved up Gerald’s back holding him against his chest and when the kiss ended Michael didn’t let go, he straightened his back bringing Gerald up with him. Gerald laughed, feeling how Michael was lifting him and hid his face against Michael’s neck.

“You’re insane,” he whispered, setting a few kisses on the warm skin.

“I’m in love,” Michael whispered back. He set Gerald back down on his feet, and gave him one last kiss before stepping away from Gerald’s personal space. “I missed you so much.” Gerald never cared much for personal space when it came to Michael and made a quick job of reclaiming his spot against his boyfriend’s warm skin. His boyfriend, he couldn’t help but let the word whisper out, like a breath. Like a breath he’d be holding in too long.

Michael sighed holding Gerald tight against himself.

“What time do you close up?” Gerald picked up his broom, putting it away before coming back to answer. He poured Michael some coffee and grabbed a banana nut muffin setting it all in front of Michael, who had retreat back to the customer side of the counter.

“I should be done around 8:30.” He fed a piece of muffin to Michael with his fingers. “Ray said he’d stop by, I haven’t seen him in awhile so we’re going to hang out for a bit.”

Michael took a large gulp of coffee trying to calm down before talking. The coffee was too hot and it burned not only his tongue, but left his stomach burning.

“Are you ok?” Gerald panicked; he knew the coffee was too hot. He could see in Michael’s face that he was hurting. Gerald hurried towards the fridge to pull out a cold bottle of water. “Here drink some. That coffee was really hot. Are you ok?”

Michael nodded. He took a large sip of the water offered before talking.

“Doesn’t Ray have any friends his age? It’s a bit weird for someone his age to be hanging out with teenagers.” He picked a small piece of the muffin and fed it with a smile to Gerald.

“He isn’t that much older.” Gerald said opening his mouth for the muffin.

“Well I wanted you to spend some time with me. I missed you so much today and I thought we could go to the beach together, a sleepover, and early tomorrow morning some surfing.” He pulled Gerald close by his green apron and kissed him, “We haven’t surfed together in a really,” He stole a second kiss before he continued talking, “really long time. Call him, tell him something came up; you’ll meet him another day.”

Gerald was about to protest, say that he’s been putting Ray off for almost a week, but then Michael kissed him again and placed the cell phone in his hands.

“Please?” Michael pouted. Michael pouted for Gerald and how could you ever expect Gerald to say no to that?


-


They were at the beach; the stars over them and sand and water beneath. It was a windy night and they hadn’t removed their shirts. Gerald sat near the water watching the waves come in and out of the shore. They played with the sand; Gerald accidentally let some sand fly out of his hand, hitting Michael on the face with it. Michael tackled him to the ground, he tickled him and Gerald tried to get away, without really wanting to. They rolled in the sand, eventually feeling the cold water hit their bodies.

Gerald froze beneath Michael as the wave washed over him; his white shirt soaked the salty liquid, sticking to his form. Michael looked down at Gerald. It was the first time he was looking at Gerald as more than a friend, he was looking at him with lover’s eyes, with lust. He looked at Gerald as his boyfriend, as the beautiful person he loved. His lips lowered to Gerald’s and his hands slithered over Gerald’s body.

Gerald’s nipples were stiff from the cold water and Michael’s ministration. Michael felt the bumps under his palms. Curious, he broke the kiss and looked down. Gerald stayed quiet watching how Michael inspected his body. Afraid that the blue eyes would find something wrong, would notice something lacking or worse something extra.

Gerald felt self-conscious, wishing he could somehow hide himself. He shifted, trying to stand, but with Michael hovering over him it was impossible. Michael looked up.

He watched how Gerald’s hair had darkened with the water, how it stuck awkwardly to his forehead. He looked into Gerald’s brown eyes, how they always seemed to look sad, no matter how happy he really was. Happiness didn’t show in Gerald’s eyes, it just seemed to shine from behind the permanent sadness. He looked at Gerald’s small nose, how the tip was pink from the cold and couldn’t resist bending down to kiss it. He continued to look at Gerald. His neck, how long it was, how his Adam apple was barely noticeable and how it bobbed up and down when Gerald swallowed.

Michael looked down at the protruding clavicles, he wondered if there was a name for the small hollow that existed between the bones. He followed the bone up to the shoulder, his hand reaching to cup it; he could feel the smallness, the sharpness. Gerald’s arms were long, thin covered by defined muscle, his fingers long and graceful.

His eyes trained back on Gerald’s nipples; he remembered the feeling of them against his palm, the white shirt had shifted with Gerald’s nervous squirming. A sliver of tan skin peeked at him. Michael’s trained hands moved; they knew very well what to do. They tickled and touched the offered skin and slowly moved the shirt to uncover more.

Michael’s hands traveled over Gerald’s body, he could feel how the boy trembled as the shirt was slowly removed, he stopped when his hands reached the armpits.

“Are you cold?” Michael whispered against Gerald’s lips. Gerald shook his head, a blush staining his cheeks, because yes he was trembling, but it wasn’t because of the weather. He was trembling because Michael’s hands were traveling over his naked skin. The slight temperature difference gave him goose bumps; it warmed him up with desire.

Michael’s hand left the shirt bundled under the armpits. The tip of his finger ghosting over barely there muscles; tracing the lines of Gerald’s abdomen, silently comparing the straight lines to the curves he had memorized.

Gerald allowed him to remove his shirt. He wanted to wrap his arms around himself, hide his chest from Michael’s eyes. Blond lashes closed, covering the hypnotizing blue. Lips landed over Gerald’s shoulders and strong hands moved his back onto the sand. Blue eyes blinked back.

Michael’s hand moved from the angle of Gerald’s shoulder down the flatness of his chest to play with the dip of his navel. He circled and caressed the slightly chilled skin as another wave hit the side of Gerald’s body. Michael’s pink tongue slipped over his lips, his eyes trained on Gerald’s flat chest. Michael thought about the differences. His hand flat against Gerald’s skin moved over the brown nipple. His flat hand rested over Gerald, familiarizing himself with the feeling.

It was the first time Michael’s caresses traveled beyond Gerald’s waist. Gerald sucked in a breath as the chilled water hit his body again. A few drops of water landing over his torso. Michaels hand moved down from the puckered nipple, straight over to the narrow hips resting under Gerald’s drenched pants.

Gerald closed his eyes, his head tilting back to the skies. Long expanse of sensitive skin exposed. Michael’s attention was drawn back, his lips rested against Gerald’s neck, tasting what he had come to recognize as Gerald. His knee asking for room between Gerald’s legs and his body resting over Gerald’s as he explored with his mouth what a minute ago his eyes had. Gerald’s arms pulled him close, begging for warmness as the waves continue to land against him.

They kissed, panting, as their heartbeats quickened. They kissed as hands grew bold, as tongues licked and teeth nipped. They kissed and hips lowered and groins met. Michael froze, unused to the hardness. He pulled away, curiosity getting the best of him.

Gerald froze for the first time, feeling ashamed of his own anatomy. He pushed Michael away, wishing nothing more than to disappear. He covered his flat chest, remembering the way Michael’s hands had traveled over them, wishing he could somehow compete with the curve filled bodies of Michael’s ex’s.

Gerald pulled his shirt over, draping the wet material over himself, trying to hide his shame as tears prickled out of his eyes. He couldn’t believe this. It had been just too good to be true. His best friend, his good looking, jock, straight best friend, suddenly gay for him. For him, nobody him, nerd, fag wannabe artist, him.

He angrily wiped away his tears, the sand stuck on his hand scratching his face.

“Stupid.” He whispered, “Stupid, stupid, stupid.” Michael’s hands fell over his shoulders, a desperate attempt to understand what is happening. He shrugs the hands off standing with his back towards Michael, too ashamed to look at him, because it doesn’t matter how much he has changed, he will never be what Michael wants.

“I don’t know why Michael wastes his time with trash like you.”

Gerald pulled the shirt over his head, the wet clothes sticking to his body, making his haste to cover his body more difficult. He wants to run and hide, because damn it, why?

“Gee?” It’s his friend’s hesitant voice, because all Michael wants to do is feel Gerald close to him again, all he wants to do is rest his fingers over the chilled skin, but he can see Gerald’s hesitance. He can feel his friend’s distress and distance and he just doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t know what went wrong. Did he touch him the wrong way? Did he go too fast, did he go too far?

Why won’t he look at him? Why won’t he turn around and yell at him, tell him what he did wrong? Slap him, anything but his back, his trembling back, his quiet sobs and distance.

Strong arms round his chest and Gerald tried to push away; he tried to break free, because he doesn’t want… he doesn’t want Michael to force himself.

“You don’t have to,” he mumbles, trying to break free. Michael takes him by the shoulders forcing brown eyes into blue.

He sees the tears, and knows he caused them, not how, not why, but he knows it was him. His heart drops, wanting to pull and console Gerald, but if his touch did it how can he force him into more?

Michael can’t stand to look as the tear-streaked wet face. He dropped his arms in a sign of surrender; wiping his own tears before they fall, and stepped away.
*****

Thanks to Lisa for being a wonderful beta. Thanks to everyone who reads, and even more thanks and cookies to those who review.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!