Best Friends Means you Pull the Trigger

Thirteen

(Written partly to Teenagers by MCR)

Nina had liver cirrhosis; all the signs were there and a biopsy confirmed it. The news was devastating for Gerald. His knees grew weak and his breath short. However, strong arms held him together, and he had never been so grateful.

Their friendship had gone back to square one, where they were always together, always laughing and telling each other, for the very first time, absolutely everything.

After Nina had been discharged from the hospital, the sleepovers from their childhood were transferred to Gerald’s apartment. They both took care of Nina, making sure she took her medicine and stayed away from alcohol. It was hard at times; they had to keep a close watch on her.

When she finally fell asleep, the boys would sneak into Gerald’s room. They lay in bed kissing each other, exploring and tasting the others' skin. Michael’s experience helped him discover every sensitive spot on Gerald’s body, bringing the boy to the brink of insanity, but nothing more than over-the-clothes touching happened.

They didn’t only kiss; they also talked. They talked about the past, Gerald told Michael about his mother, about the crazy things she would do to ‘make up’ for disappearing or forgetting special dates like birthdays.
Michael would confess of all his jealousy driven stupidities, would tell him funny anecdotes about football practice and embarrassing things that had happened with girlfriends.

Gerald’s whole world once more was Michael. He didn’t have time for art or his friends. Michael wasn’t ready to come out to everyone, still trying to come to terms with the fact that he was in love, and very, very attracted to another male. Gerald completely understood, and never dreamed of forcing Michael to come out, he knew how hard it was. And so, all his free time was dedicated to waiting for Michael to have time for him.
Michael bought him a cell phone, the whole paranoia thing with his mom would have been avoided if there were an easy way to contact him. It was a prepaid phone, but still…it was incredible to Gerald.

The cell phone became a nightmare, something Gerald’s friends grew to hate. Michael called Gerald every ten minutes, to make sure he was ok, if he needed something, who he was with, where he was. They weren’t short calls either; Michael liked to keep Gerald on the phone for at least ten minutes, he didn’t care what Gerald was doing. He wanted to hear the boy’s voice, to feel that he was just as important to him as Gerald was to him.
The first to know about Gerald and Michael was Sean. Michael left Gerald with his mom at the hospital and went home to sleep and go to school the next day. He was also to talk to Gerald’s guidance counselor at school and explain his absences.

Michael arrived home with a wide smile. He couldn’t hide how happy he was. Sean was sitting in the family room playing a video game. He saw his brother enter from the corner of his eye, but did no motion to imply he had noticed him. Michael stood by the door watching Sean; a large smile on his face.

He sat next to Sean and stole the remote right out of his hands. Sean didn’t know how Michael did that; he never saw it coming and it didn’t matter how tight he held the damn thing. The channel was switched and Sean, instead of bickering with Michael over it, simply growled lowly and moved out of the room.
“I’m his boyfriend.” Michael slowly moved his eyes from the TV towards Sean’s frozen frame by the door. “Not only is he my best friend, I am also his boyfriend.”

Sean turned, narrowing his eyes at Michael. He tried to read his brother's expression, but all he could see was smugness.

“Liar.”

Michael smiled, turning the TV off, before standing up and moving towards Sean.

“Nope, and my boyfriend asked me to apologize for that bruise.” Michael pushed against Sean’s sore chin. “I’m sorry,” sarcasm dripped from the words.

“What are you playing at? Haven’t you hurt him enough?” Sean felt an immense sadness, he wanted Gerald to be happy, he wanted him to have anything he wanted, even his brother if that was what would make him happy, but something felt off. “Don’t hurt him anymore Michael, he’s gone through enough.”

Michael turned serious, somehow not expecting that reaction from his brother. He was expecting jealousy, screams. Not this acceptance.

“I won’t hurt him. I want to protect him. Sean, Gerald is mine now and I’m going to take care of him. I love him.” Michael smiled down at his brother, a genuine smile. “I really am sorry for hitting you.” There was no sarcasm in the words this time.

“Eh,” Sean shrugged. “I’m glad to hear you love him; I know he loves you too.” They both smiled, a small understanding between brothers. "Michael, just be careful with him. You’re my brother, but I will kill you if you hurt him; he’s my friend.”

“He doesn’t need your protection anymore. He has me now. So, no more hugs to comfort him, no more trips to your room…nothing more Sean. You are my brother but I will kill you if you touch him; he is mine.”
Sean shook his head but didn’t say anything. His brother wasn’t a bad guy, he was just a little screwed up.
‘He’ll eventually figure it out...’ Sean thought, moving into his bedroom. ‘I hope so.’

-

Gerald missed several days of school to stay home with his mom. Ray was kind enough to find her an AA group to join, and Mrs. Harrison helped keep an eye on her while Gerald was in school.

Nina promised her son she would quit drinking this time, but Gerald wasn’t naïve; he could seem it, but he knew his mom could easily fall back. He knew that after so many years of abuse it would be almost impossible for her, but he still hoped.

On his first day back Gerald walked directly towards Sean’s locker. Michael wasn’t coming out to anyone and Gerald didn’t want to put him on the spot. Sean and Trent, as expected, were putting up a little show by the open locker. Gerald cleared his throat.

Trent had a wide smile and took Gerald into a hug. Gerald was surprised, looking towards Sean for an explanation, Sean just shrugged.

“Congrats,” Trent said letting go, “it was about time.”

Gerald didn’t know what he was talking about, and it took him a few minutes for everything to click together. Sean informed Gerald that Michael had told him, and he had shared the information with Trent.

Gerald smiled, not hiding even in the slightest the fact, that he truly was happy. He thanked Trent with a kiss on the cheek, and asked them not to say anything, because he didn’t want Michael to be outed, or to feel pressured into coming out.

Michael walked by his brother’s locker and smiled at all three boys. He didn’t look the other way, he looked at them. He didn’t say hello, but at least he smiled and gave Gerald a little wink.

Frank was standing by the bathrooms surrounded by his little group of friends, and called Michael over.

“We need to talk.” He moved before the blond could answer. He led him down the hall, and out to the back of the school. Frank and Michael were the co-captains of the football team. Frank lit a cigarette and took several drags, before turning towards Michael.

“There has been talk around school.” Another drag, “You were absent several days last week…as well …as…” He cleared his throat, before dropping the cigarette and putting it out with the tip of his dark blue sneakers. Michael stood beside him, his hands in his pockets, and eyes on the sky; the light blue sky.

“You have a position in this school,” Frank continued. “The football team has an image, and we as captains are expected to uphold it.”

Michael couldn’t help scoffing. An image, what image was Frank talking about, sexist pigs, cavemen, drunks?

Frank looked at Michael but didn’t say anything about the noise.

“Heard you broke up with your girlfriend; my cousin still wants you.”

“I’m not interested Frank.” Michael rested his back against the wall. He kept his eyes on the sky and his mind on Gerald. He would take Gerald to the beach tonight to watch the sun set together, maybe take a swim. He smiled bit, thinking about how Gerald would laugh when the first cold wave of water hit his warm skin.

“Dude, this last week or so you’ve pulled away from the team. Don’t fuck around, we need to stay together and we need you to stay strong. We’ve been doing good this season, and I want to fucking win this year. It’s our last and you know scouts will be here to see us. Don’t fuck this up.”

“My personal life will not interfere with football.” Michael turned around, deciding he’d had enough of Frank.

“Don’t fuck up,” Frank yelled behind him. He didn’t like this; he didn’t like this at all. Frank knew that a lot of his popularity depended on Michael; he would never admit to this, but he knew Michael was better looking. Most of his girlfriends were thanks to Michael, friends of Michael’s girlfriends. Frank was seen as an extension of Michael, and no chance in hell Frank was going to let his friend ruin their reputation.

-

Gerald’s smile didn’t go unnoticed by anyone. Everyone asked him about it; he would blush and avoid the question, but everyone knew someone special had entered his life.

Art class was his second to last period. He was humming while he broke up some blue glass he had found. He had a sketch of what he wanted to create, but he knew that no matter how much he planned a picture, it would always take a life of its own. The bell rang and he didn’t move, lost in his thoughts as he separated the too large pieces from the too small. The classroom emptied, Sandra said bye to Gerald, but he didn’t hear anything at all.

The teacher came up to him, startling Gerald when he touched his shoulder. He looked around and blushed at the empty classroom. Mr. McCracken smiled and offered Gerald a pass for the next class, but first he wanted to talk to him.

“What are your plans for after high school?”

Plans for after high school? Gerald didn’t have plans for after high school; he didn’t have time to be thinking about after high school. College never even crossed his mind. How would he pay for it? The only thing he knew, is that from part-time in the coffee shop he would go to full-time, and hopefully get some benefits.

The teacher handed him some brochures.

“You have talent, and I would hate to see it go to waste. There is an art show in four months; the winner gets a scholarship in to The Art College. I want you to enter it. I’ve already filled out the entry form. I need your signature, and for you to start working on something, or maybe even choose one of your pictures.”

Gerald stared at his teacher; he couldn’t utter a single word. A scholarship, college, talent, had he entered some parallel dimension?

The Art College was one of the most prestigious schools in the country, but it was on the west coast.

“I can’t,” Gerald said, dropping the pamphlets. He couldn’t move across the country; what about his mom? What about Michael? He didn’t know what Michael had planned for the future, but he doubt he would move away.

The teacher took everything and placed it back into the boy’s hands, “Read it, think about it. Even if you don’t take the scholarship winning this contest, even if it isn’t first place, it would look great in your portfolio; it would put your name on the map. Don’t let your talent go to waste.”

Gerald thanked the teacher and walked out with the papers. Not only had this conversation put college in Gerald’s mind, but had also put the idea of making art his profession. Could he do it? Did he really have the talent for it?

Gerald had won several contests held by the school, but this was different. He wouldn’t be competing against his classmates; he’d be competing with thousands of artist from around the country; kids who had dedicated their life to art; kids who attended specialized schools.

a/n: I know I take for ever to update, but thanks for sticking around, and reviewing. I love hearing for you guys and your reviews always remind me I need to update, so please keep them coming.

Thanks Lisa like always for beta reading.