Mr.Sandman

(11) To Call My Own

Tracy…not that…
I nodded to myself and sat up, rolling off him and drawing the covers around me.
My face went numb, hopefully expressionless. All I needed was to wake up in my bed alone, then, I’d really be open for project suicide. How morbid…
I shuddered and began to rummage on the floor for my underwear.
I felt his warm gaze on me, the hesitation to say something but not wanting to imply anything more. I ignored it.
I found my bra under the chair of his computer desk and my panties on a coat rack behind the door. Finding a clean t-shirt of his on the ground, I pulled it on and had the hem reach me mid thigh.
“Are you hungry?” I asked curtly, picking up my clothing and dumping them in his empty hamper at the far end of the room.
He made a short “Mnm” sound, so I quickly left the room.
The house was smaller than mine, the kitchen, easy to find. I looked in the pantry and cabinets, frowning.
“What?”
I jumped up and screamed, “Holy shit!”
Raine chuckled. “Sorry.”
I huffed and turned to stab him with my glare. He was less modest, having only pulled on his boxers before leaving the room, my daggers faltered.
His grin was proud and hopeful. “What?”
“You don’t own anything edible.” I muttered, turning back to the open cabinet.
“Cheeto’s are edible.” He reached over me and pulled out an open bag that no one had bothered to tuck closed.
I sighed. “They are if your goal is a heart attack in T minus 2 seconds. Besides, that bag was open too long, ants might-” I stopped abruptly as he pressed his entire body against my back, resting his head on my shoulder and his every curve distracting.
“Mmm…protein.” He said throatily and nipped my earlobe.
I was unaccustomed to his playing and froze with distraught. How was I supposed to respond?
His thumbs made a quick caress on my forearms and he pulled away abruptly. “Alright, I’ll throw the bag away.”
I moved slowly to the fridge and heard him closing the lid of the trash.
The shelves had a carton of orange juice with a missing cap, Chinese food containers, a McDonalds bag with who knows what inside and two cans of coke. On the door there were empty packages of condiments and a half stick of butter.
“You really do want that heart attack.”
He laughed, “What do you want to drink? I got some warm beer out back and Rum hidden somewhere by Albert.”
“Water, please. I don’t like alcohol and you don’t seem to have milk.” I opened the freezer door.
Popsicles of grape flavor, Poptarts and a tray of ice with two cubes missing of six.
He sniffed. “Hope you don’t mind tap water.” I sighed again and pulled out the small tray of ice.
“Who buys the food?” I asked curiously, searching for a glass.
“Umm, well, it was my turn to go grocery shopping this week, but uh…” He cut himself short looking at my glass. “Tracy, that one’s dirty.”
I looked at it closer and almost dropped it with disgust.
It had a green stain at the bottom. It may have been my imagination, but it looked slightly furry.
“Want me to order a pizza?” He offered bashfully.
I was indecisive. If we got dressed and went out to buy real food, it would mean our day was over, if we remained as we were, we’d have to eat pizza.
Heart attack or Raine?
I slumped forward. “Fine, but order it from Papa John’s and don’t put anything that’ll leave a taste even after I pick it out.”
He gave me one of those steamy looks that made my goose-bumps kick in.
“What if we try something out? Have you every tried to focus on anything when being fucked?”
My eyes widened. “Raine!”
He wiggled an eyebrow. “I’m thoroughly interested in seeing what kind of pizza you’d order.”
“Ugh! That’s disgusting!” I gagged trying to leave the kitchen.
“Alright! Alright, I’m kidding!” he growled holding his arm out to keep me from leaving. “Let’s compromise, what toppings do you like?”
“Uhh.. Hawaiian and um…BBQ.” I shifted uncomfortably.
“Ok, so I’ll mount the dishwasher and you order the BBQ pizza. Oh… damn, I was going to ask you to order a stuffed crust but that’s only at Pizza Hut.”
“I can ask to see what they have?”
He gazed down at me, surprised. He didn’t smile but leaned forward and wrapped me in an embrace. “On second thought, forget the pizza.” He murmured and kissed my neck.
I giggled and pushed at him. “Come on, Raine. You clean and I’ll order.”
He paused before letting go. “If you don’t put pants on, I’m not opening that door to anyone.”
Truth was, if he’d fought me to hold on, I’d give in and forget the pizza.
Somehow, it wasn’t a bad idea.
I grinned. “What if it’s a teenage girl, delivering?”
He shrugged, now pouting. “That’s different.”
My jaw clicked. “Really?”
He looked at my face and rolled his eyes. “I’d get punished wouldn’t I?”
“You’re a quick learner!” I gripped his cheeks and shook them till he fought me off and stormed to the dishwasher with a swollen face.
I was still smiling while I told a Papa John’s employee on the phone my order.
________________________________________ ______________________
The delivery boy was a man in his late fifties with bifocal glasses that almost tipped over when he spoke.
Raine had sent me to hide in the room till the guy left, but he’d seen me when Raine opened the door and seemed to continue looking for me while handing over the pizza.
Raine’s face was tranquil, even as he tipped the man with a paper bag with 2 dollars worth in pennies.
I was overflowing with warmth and happiness.
I felt so light next to him, like I stood on clouds and my body weighed less than a paper clip, my mind fuzzy and free.
He found a sealed packet of paper plates in the garage and served me a slice. I brought him a beer, two clean glasses, one filled with ice and water for me. I filled the ice tray and shoved it back in the freezer.
We sat in a living room with thick flowered curtains and stuffy plastic couches.
“Thrift Store.” Was his comment as I sat down and sank 4 inches into the vanilla couch.
We ate the entire pizza and were still a hungry, but we didn’t make it to the bedroom before he ripped his t-shirt off me. On the wooden counter top of the kitchen we went at each other hard and fast.
I was still seeing stars when he picked me up and laid us both on his bed. It took me some time to realize he was shaking.
I wrapped my arms around him in fear. “What’s wrong??”
“I-I’m still not accustomed to your actually being here…after shock, probably.” His lips trembled.
I sighed raggedly and held him closer. “Raine, my beautiful precious Raine…”
He sniffed my neck. “I like this perfume.”
I smiled hazily. “Of course you do. It’s the smell of us.”
He closed his eyes. “Us. We’re actually together.”
I nodded.
“I wonder how the dreams began anyway.”
My finger curled around a lock of his hair. “The ‘Accident’ may have triggered it.”
His shoulders clenched.
I didn’t let him pull away or make me regret saying it.
I wouldn’t…couldn’t.
“Why do you have to stick your nose in what isn’t your business?” he hissed angrily, limp.
My eyes narrowed. “I thought I might be deserving of trust. That’s how relationships work.”
“Interesting theory, considering your fucking single!”
I pulled my arms away.
I closed my eyes to not see his face. “Why are you trying to hurt me instead of answering? Is it worth hiding from me so much that your willing to make me cry?” I sniffed.
I heard nothing.
We were like that for who knows how long.
It could have been minutes just as it could have been days.
“My stepbrother Nick is six and a half years old.” He spoke quietly to the night that had discretely befallen us. “My father remarried some plastic bimbo when I was 12 and they had Nick. They treasured Nick, it was always pretty clear. I won trophies at spelling bee’s and swim meets while Nick got dressed in expensive clothing and thought he knew better than everyone else.”
The moon peered out from behind the trees and shared the glow of his animosity towards the boy. “I had to take care of the squirt one day, and dragged him along with me to the beach. I had to practice a new stroke coach taught us for the meet the next day. I hadn’t practiced all week so I took my chance when available. Nick knew the rules. They were the same as the other billion times we’ve gone to the beach.”
He went quiet for a moment and closed his eyes when my cool hand cupped his cheek. “He disappeared when I wasn’t looking. I got four life guards and searched for him everywhere. By the time we found him, he was practically past the point of resuscitation. He was lucky to wake up at all, the little prick. He went at the hospital and I got my fair share of screaming from his mom and my dad. But Nick was fine. He would be.
“The next day I went to the school’s swim meet and brought home a trophy and a medal. I was levitating with happiness.” He chuckled, opening his eyes again. “Well, at least until I found the entrance to the driveway filled with trash bags that held my room; my trophies, clothing and computer. I was kicked out of my house. No explanations. Not even an answer when I knocked the door or called them. Nothing.”
Tears were heavily sinking my eyes and I breathed his pain with every painful intake.
“I lived in my car for three weeks. Two months ago, or approximately, was when it happened. Albert offered me a room at his house and a job. I owe him everything, but I think things got worse for me when I started to dream of you Tracy.”
I chocked on my own words and threw myself at him. He rested his head on mine. “Sshh...don’t cry luv.”
“I wanna (sniff) kick (sniff) your dad’s (choke) ass!”
From somewhere deep within him, he mustered up a smile and kissed me.
I was blaring with anger and seeping with sadness. “But…you were his little boy, that bastard!”
His nose rubbed mine. “Seems like I’m not anymore; Tracy, do you still live with your parents?”
I was about to nod when my eyes almost popped out of their sockets as I ran to the hamper to retrieve my pants. “My mom! She’ll be worried and bitch me to death, fuck!! Where the hell is that damn cell phone??”
“Tracy, use mine, it’s on the nightstand over there.” He said weakly.
I reached for it and as I waited for the ringtone, I looked down at his form, worn away from exhaustion and moonlight reflections. “Hey, Raine?”
“Mmm?”
“Tomorrow, let’s go buy some real groceries, and then, come home with me. I want you to meet my parents.”
He shifted and looked at me for a long while. My mom picked up and I began to explain to her what she wouldn’t understand through her screaming.
Raine smiled. “I’d like that.”

--- End ---
- I've been having difficulties to kick off the sequel to this, Because there is you. There are still some things left unsolved, like Raine's older brother and how their relationship will manage. Here's a drawing i did of Tracy and Raine. http://storytellersdaughter.deviantart.com/art/Chocolate-62429526 -