Starfire

Chapter edited to reflect changes in latter chapters within the character of Lt. Tel Livindian

Nov. 11

((Another chapter for y\'all! Sorry it\'s taking so long, guys! We love you all for being patient with us... Life is getting very, very busy but we will never forget you beautiful readers!!

Susuc: I\'m so completely proud that you like this and all the periods is actually my fault... See there? Force of habit... :P But I\'m working at getting better with it... D\'oh! I did it again!! No seriously, I\'m working on being more punctual, but thank you so much for reading!

CrystalFireWings: You so rock! Anyone who uses CAPS lock to plead for more chapters is a-ok in my book! There\'s a WHOLE lot more where these lovely chapters came from so keep checking back, okay? :huggle:

V: Yes, we are such cruel, cruel girls! We have to get you addicted, you know! But I\'m so glad you love our story so much and want more! We\'re definitely working on it!

Shannon: ::beams:: You have no clue how good this makes us feel! I\'m just like dancing in my chair with happiness! Thank you so much!

Kikvws: You know, I had no clue which way this story was going to go, but I tell you, writing with Memme is like riding the hugest roller coaster in existence... The twists and turns work out so perfectly and we just work so well together... It\'s bliss and we hope it shows! Thank you for enjoying our journey with us!

Turtledonkey: Oh man, if someone picked this story up and made it an anime, that would be SO GOOD!! I\'d probably wear the dvd out... ::laughs:: But yes, it is tough to be so mean to our boys and I kind of identify with Tyrin because my self esteem isn\'t quite up there either so I\'m good at taking things the wrong way... But yes, tension in a story is a must... It just makes it more interesting, just like an argument that leads to making up... :D But thank you so much for enjoying our story and we promise to get you more when we can!

Okay, nuff chatterin\'!!! Here we go again!!))

Chapter Eleven: Losing Faith

How long has it been now? Since Tyrin closed his eyes after staring at the bolts holding the chains to the wall? He doesn\'t know, really. It seemed like a long, long time as Tex held him tighter. God, that fucking man! Tyrin didn\'t have enough fight in him to push his friend away and really, he did need this. He felt safe. So safe and he almost hated himself for it. But he was just too tired. he was drained and he slept. He gave up and he slept.

And he didn\'t wake up. Not even when another came in the room for that brief moment. And not for a long time after that either.

But when he does.

He groans softly, his head still thundering like crazy as he slips his eyes open, trying to focus on something. everything is cloudy and he blinks several times, eyes lifting to those same bolts he was staring at for so long last night. Realizing he was still imprisoned in this hell hole. Tyrin sighs softly and shifts against the arms that still hold him, trying to pull away now. That was enough. he\'s awake now and he\'s okay. he can pretend anyway.

\"Morning,\" he says simply, not mentioning anything about last and hoping Tex will at least do him that favor by not bringing it up as well.

\"How are you feeling? I hope you ain\'t hurting too much. My head feels like it\'s going to explode in a minute, though. Damn. Did you sleep?\" he asks slipping to the corner of the bed, bringing his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, giving Tex a quiet glance every now and again before turning his attention to the fabric of his pants.

Tex groans, but he\'s not hurting so badly any longer. Not after the anti-inflammatory that Tel had slipped him. Not that Tel had to kiss him either, fuckhead.

Anyway, yeah, so he\'s not in as much pain, but he could use a few aspirin and a bed. That and maybe a comfortable pair of arms around him.

Of course, that won\'t happen either. He winces at the coldness in Tyrin and grunts a morning himself, not feeling up to pretending. He\'s a punching bag at present, most surfaces of his body are black and blue, his face a mass of bruises so that the beauty of his natural face is destroyed and turned purple and red. He\'s in fucking pain and he tried but it\'s not like he can think the best in this state.

\"Sure..\" he grimaces and sits up, carefully standing on his now bandaged leg, the antiseptic being helpful. Then again, maybe a pain reliever would have made him too sleepy. That is something that Tel would have thought of, jerk.

All the more reason to hate him.

The door opens and Tex stares up into the blonde, pale eyed man who enters. \"Gentlemen. you may come with me as you are, or you may be dragged. which do you prefer?\" and his smile is cool, professional as are his eyes, and he stares primarily at Tyrin. Tex will have to be dragged, according to that look on his face.

Behind him, a dark haired and a black haired rebel stand with blaster rifles and sneers on their faces. One had been a man who\'d put himself against Tex just the day before. He was obviously looking forward to another go.

Great. So they have more humiliation to look forward to today, then. Just fucking great. Tyrin rolls his eyes quietly, looking over to his partner, shaking his head. And then over to the blonde, looking past him at the two guards, feeling disgust rising in his throat before just sighs. he doesn\'t have enough energy to fight.. It\'s hard enough keeping his fucking eyes open.

\"Let\'s do this and get it over with. I\'m too tired to fight. Are you going to be okay with your leg? Do you need any help?\" Tyrin asked very quietly. he didn\'t want to take anymore of Tex\'s manhood away by offering him help as if he were a child. But then, Tyrin does still care very much about his friend and he shouldn\'t be walking on it. Tyrin finally moves from the bed, stumbling, but catching the wall to break his fall. he sighs softly and squints just a bit before standing straight, waiting for the bindings to be taken off. Just get whatever it is the fuck over with. Kill them, jettison them off into space. He\'s praying that there won\'t be a long ass speech or anything.

Tyrin proves to be easy enough to lead, but Tex needs hands on him, which the black haired man approves of, and while they do not bind Tyrin, but allow him to walk ahead of them with the simple shackle about his arms, they do in fact, bind Tex, fully aware of his nature, or rather, what nature their lieutenant has told them he has.

Lt. Tel Livindian leads them through the hatchways and various doors and sections of the ship, an almost confusing array of them, coming at last to the bridge, through that as well and beyond into the captain\'s office. It was a room sparsely furnished with an oblong table used for bridge staff meetings. The younger man leads them (or rather, guides the guards who lead them) into the room, then, saluting, turns and indicates two chairs while nodding to the guards. The men leave, not without a sly touch upon Tex\'s backside from the dark haired man, and leave the bound men with the lieutenant and a tall, slender man whom the lieutenant salutes again.

\"As you requested, sir. The prisoner was given some bandages to aid his leg and he has cleansed himself as well as he was able. The other has been little trouble to us. Would you like me to remain, sir or to leave you?\" The blonde sneaks a glance to them and then back to his captain. He does not seem outwardly nervous, more curious if anything else. Still, it is perhaps, a well known fact on the bridge, that Lt. Livindian appears to dislike being involved in anything that might turn... personal. Not that that has stopped his captain from using him in every capability he\'s come to be useful in. There is no room for personal preference here on board and Lt. Livindian would not outwardly go against his superior officer, ever.

But in private, he may say a word or two against it. As he had before, when told that he would get them.

But sir, you know that I\'ve known Howard Heeseman since he was young. I\'d really rather you found another man to do the job.

Of course, even a calm, distant request can be denied if the captain sees reason to it. And no one expects the captain to explain why either. And he hadn\'t.

Captain Privyn Roake is tall. Tall and slender. Platinum blonde hair and haunting gray eyes fixed upon a gentle looking face. His back was to his \'audience\' and he didn\'t turn around for a long moment. he couldn\'t lose his temper this time around. This is a reckoning now. Bullshit has to be put aside.

\"Leave me, Livindian,\" he says simply, his voice cool. Gentle as his slim body. He turns then and looks upon his prisoners, from one to the other, waiting for the blonde to leave.

\"Well, well. Mr. Heeseman. I was surely hoping not to ever see you again. But, since you\'re here. Have you enjoyed your stay? I thought since you were not dead at all as I\'d hoped, I figured I\'d take it out on you somehow.\" Privyn smirks and takes slow steps towards the two.

Tyrin is looking at the captain coldly from the moment he speaks and he has to bite his tongue to prevent himself from saying something that would get them killed. he sighs softly and looks over to his friend before lowering his head.

\"I heard so many good things. I was almost tempted to partake. Too bad we haven\'t had a taste of that one over there. Perhaps we should. My stars. my crew is so insatiable.. \" Looking over to Tyrin and licking his lips before offering a almost sinister laugh.

\"Ah, well. Down to the real business you little shit. I want to know why you\'re here. And I\'m only going to ask you once. If I don\'t like the answer, Mr. Heeseman, I\'m going to kill the redhead. If you care at all for his safety, you\'ll answer my question, won\'t you?\"

His face, so beautiful but so cold. So filled with quiet rage. And so ready to beat the living shit out of the both of them. This is business. No matter how cruel the business, that\'s all it is. And no one is going to ruin his. There\'s too much at stake. Way too much has happened to let anyone undermine him.

Tex doesn\'t look at Tyrin. He can\'t. Standing rigid, his arms bound in chains, he suddenly sees how incredibly. cold everything has become. His body aches, in every place. And it doesn\'t help to be here with this cock sure asshole who\'s just managed to stick it to him again, only in a far more tender place.

Standing straighter, he gathers himself for a verbal battle, lifting his eyes to the man\'s and finding the words die on his tongue. With a groan, he slumps backwards, knowing there to be a wall behind him of some sort. He has to take a step, two steps back to reach it, but at the moment, he can\'t feel much like standing well on his own. Staring down, aware that while he\'d thought Tyrin would have been an asset, his friend has turned into very much of a drag on his ability to deal. He could allow the captain to shoot Tyrin. It would be better than the alternative. An alternative that Tex feels more and more certain that he\'ll not be able to avert from Tyrin forever.

But, maybe? Oh heavens. how frustrating!

\"Look.. yes.. I\'ll answer. But.\" he cringes, not wanting to set the man off, nor Tyrin for that matter, \"you have to let him go. He has to be untouched, unharmed. He has to be.. safe all the way back home. I\'ll tell you anything you want. But you gotta let him go. Cause it\'s .\" he finds it damn hard to breathe right now, with his heart collapsing in his chest. \"Cause he didn\'t have nuthin\' to do with any of this..\" his voice softening. He doesn\'t understand half of what the captain means and feels as if he\'s missing something right in front of his nose. But he can\'t find it, can\'t see it. It\'s not adding up, only it adds up far too well. And all he can think is that somehow, he\'s not playing the part well enough. He\'s not fooling anyone.

\"Besides..\" he glares, \"I won\'t tell you anything if you hurt him. You kill him, you\'ll have to kill me too. And I won\'t talk. I\'m strong enough for any shit you throw at me, asswipe,\" his growl is gravely, confused almost, as if it\'s forgotten to be dangerous, even while it is dangerous. A break in the rumble as his thoughts underneath it all dance and shimmer and cause him to stumble.

\"What the fuck?!\" Tyrin screams in short order, the captains face alight with amusement at the outburst.

Tyrin is plenty pissed though. How could Tex say something like that? Tyrin was in the middle of all of this. He had a big fucking hand in this shit. How could Tex think that he wouldn\'t go all the way with him?

\"No. I was just as much a part of this as you were, Tex. I\'m not fucking going anywhere. Not without you,\" he growls even more as Privyn just laughs at the angst in the fiery redhead.

\"Well. Isn\'t that just news? So Tex. You lied to me. That\'s enough reason for me to fucking kill him and you too. Nevertheless. It seems as though the options have narrowed. You talk or I kill him. Simple as that.\" Pacing the floor now in that predatory manner, eyes a light with mischief before he stops in front of Tex. Those pale eyes of his. The pierce and they stab into his prisoner.

\"Answer the question. Now. I have no time for games. Don\'t you understand? There is a war going on out there. A war. A war to keep what we\'ve worked so hard for. We\'ve been mining on that moon for hundreds of years. Mining to put food on tables and clothing on children\'s backs. Mining to keep roofs over people\'s heads. And now the government thinks they can just come in and take the precious material and artifacts we\'ve dug up for themselves. So you see. I need to know who\'s fucking side you\'re on. Do you understand?\" Privyn\'s said his piece. He\'s said all he\'s going to say as far as explanations. Until he knows where things lie. Where they both stand.

Tyrin looks over to Tex and then back to the light haired captain, a tilt to his head even as a guard has a blaster at his skull. His eyes close and he hopes to hell Tex just goes and tells him. \"Why did you try to kill him? After all we did to protect your sorry ass, why the fuck would you destroy him? That\'s why I\'m here. That\'s why I came along. After all Tex has done for you. After all that. I don\'t understand.\"

\"Well. I suppose that\'s a fair question isn\'t it? I had my reasons. I didn\'t know whether I could truly trust him. And rather than letting Tex get captured so he could spill his guts about what we were, and still are carrying, I felt it best to put him out of his misery. Simply put, he was a liability that I could not afford.\"

\"Liability? You\'re fucking crazy,\" Tyrin says in a voice of disbelief, which is immediately reprimanded with a hard slap to the jaw by another guard.

Privyn growls some and moves over to Tyrin, grabbing his shirt and jerking the boy towards him. \"Watch your mouth, pretty boy. You\'re fucking testing my patience,\" pushing the redhead hard onto the floor.

Okay, so Tyrin fubbed it. Muffed it, fucking fucked it up. Double fuck. Tex growls low at the man and says nothing, only stares at him and squelches a desire to punch the fucker\'s nose into the back of his neck. \'Just shut up, Tyrin, can\'t you see what I\'m trying\' (and failing) \'to do?\' he mentally groans. But no, there\'s nothing there. It\'s not that Tyrin isn\'t a smart guy, nor that he can\'t get in there with the rest of them, but he\'s thinking with his heart - no.. his dick, that\'s easier to think and easier to pay attention to, and it doesn\'t undermine what he\'s trying to do, so that he watches Tyrin hit the ground and runs his hands, shackled and sore, through his hair.

\"Hunh. You fuckin rape me with yer fuckin asswipe crew, you threaten to kill m\'partner, and now yer gonna kill us all,\" Tex snorts, trying desperately to set up a plan for them. \"Hmm. my mind isn\'t pulling together too fuckin well, but I should be able to put this together somehow. Hmmm.\" he winces as he leans back against the wall finally and sneers. \"You\'re saying I lied, but I\'m saying, you\'re listening to the wrong guy. And give me some credit for having a fuckin\' conscience, huh? So you got m\'pal here. And you obviously haven\'t heard anything from the specs team that have been listening in on our room, cause you\'d have heard enough to tell you that Tyr there, would anh -\" he groans.

His head really is fucking pounding like a mother.. and he\'s ready to snap at anything. With a groan, he turns and stares at Tyrin, watching the redhead on the ground. \"Stop being such a fucking bleeding heart, Tyr..\" finally, as if he\'s given in. \"You and I both know you\'re being a dumbass. You\'re getting nothing from me, so stop acting like you know any fucking thing. He\'ll just kill you or rape you too and who the fuck\'ll care, huh? Don\'t be an idiot.\"

Privyn\'s brows raise in surprise and he can\'t help bursting out laughing at Tex and his cold words. \"Damn. And I thought I was bad. Well then.\" The captain steps away from Tyrin, still laughing at the boy. Seems poor Tyrin\'s having a bad day, isn\'t he?

Yes. Tex has broken his so called bleeding heart again. Tex has stepped on those pieces and crushed them into millions more. So badly that it becomes like the wind. Blowing away never to be found again. Tyrin\'s head was spinning out of control now. So much pain. So much that it seemed to spread through him like a wild fire. Attacked on all sides.

Those words. Oh, god they hurt so badly. He feels anger welling up inside of him. he feels it just like he feels the pain. He feels it burning a hole into his being and he his eyes say it all. No matter that they\'re dark as hell.

\"You. You bastard.\" He could not even get the words out. Tex has hurt him more than any man he\'d ever been abused by. Hurt him more than being humiliated by those fools. he couldn\'t believe his fucking ears and he would rather have died right then than to hear them. \"You know what? I don\'t want any fucking thing from you. Get the fuck over yourself you fucking cunt!\"

He shuts his eyes and stays right where he is on the floor, fighting the angry tears burning like battery acid against his tightly closed lids. he couldn\'t hold it in. Damn it all to hell, he tried. \"Why the -fuck- am I your partner then?? What the hell have I been -doing- here with your sorry ass? No. I don\'t want shit from you. Fuck you.\"

He turns his head to the still laughing captain and he glares at him before standing to his feet. \"Go the fuck on and kill me then. I ain\'t no fucking use to you anyway. I\'d rather be dead right now than to be in this room any longer. Fucking KILL me. I don\'t give shit anymore. There. Does that make you happy?\"

Privyn just laughs.

\"You know. You\'re being quite melodramatic, the two of you. It\'s funny. really. But like I said, I have no fucking time for this bull shit. And your friend is on my last fucking nerve.\"

Tex threw the dice, he held his breath, and he\'s lost. Dammit all to hell. He\'s lost in a big way.

He stares at the pale haired man, his eyes blazing. \"Yeah? I guess a guy like you has stuff to do.

\"Okay, so you want to know ..\" he can\'t figure out how to salvage what he\'s thrown away. Privyn has seen through it all, and in the end, Tex can\'t do a fucking thing to stop it all. \"So here\'s the beef. I\'m not for you. and I\'m sure as not fucking against yer miners. If anything, this is private.\"

Tex steps forward and his shackles jangle harshly. His fists clenched. \"See.. I was sitting fucking dead in the water, m\'engines out and you took a pot shot at me, you fucking bastard. I was doing a fucking job, then you\'re all for battling the fucking federal with me, but at the last minute, you fucking back down, leaving me and my partner in the water. Then, when I\'m done blasting the shit out of those fuckers, you go and try and shoot me down.

\"Give me one fucking good reason I shouldn\'t be wanting to see your entire ship in pieces, you damned asswipe? I don\'t give a shit about who\'s on whose fucking side. I may be all for the fucking colony but it wouldn\'t change one iota of my wish that you were blasted sky high. People who stab others in the back aren\'t worth my fucking time.\" He spits on the ground then, right before that fucking well polished boot. \"So fuck you.. fuck your cause, and fuck yer fucking ship. I ain\'t doin\' fuck for you. so see? It\'s personal, you fuckwad.

\"It\'s got nothin\' to do with Tyr. It\'s you and me, asswipe. So I\'m not asking no fucking more. I\'m telling you. The only way I can promise you I won\'t wipe yer sorry ass off the face of the universe is if you leave m\'partner alone. You touch him, and you\'ll have nailed the last fucking ten penny into your fucking shit coffin. Take that in yer pipe and smoke it, hunh?\" If Tyr hadn\'t been around, he might have managed to keep it under wraps, maybe even pull a few and keep them for himself. But Tyr\'s close to getting his fucking head blown off and Tex really hasn\'t anything left to lose no more. He has to be honest, he can\'t pretend not to care... he\'s turned everything around as it is and made a mess of things, trying to play a part that never did fly.

\"Damn you..\" he manages at the last.

Damn them both it seems. Tyrin wasn\'t understanding any of this. None of it. Oh, he\'s reading everything wrong and maybe it\'s a bit of dementia from being locked up or watching the horror and reality of rape before his eyes. He\'s confused now. Painfully confused by Tex\'s words now. So does he fucking care about Tyrin or not?! There was nothing left for him to say. He had no more fight. Tex spills the beans about this whole mess and then it\'s silent.

The captain has heard enough. His questions were answered. he didn\'t like it that\'s for sure. He\'s guilty of all Tex has said and Tex has made his point quite plain. \"I see,\" rather disinterestedly his voice is as he looks Tex right in the eyes, his anger flared, though he doesn\'t act upon it. He knows Tex\'s nature and he\'s not one to bluff. Even the captain knows it. But then it all raises another question.

\"So. It was personal. And. just what were you planning to do, hmm? What was it you were fishing for? I mean. surely no one so smart would come aboard this ship, cut the video and audio feeds just for revenge. Oh wait. You wanted to find out what it is we\'re carrying. That\'s it isn\'t it? Yes. yes, that just has to be it.\"

The captain begins to pace the floor in front of the two boys held captive here. \"Well. I\'m quite sorry Mr. Heeseman. I can\'t let you in on that secret. And since you still know too much for my taste, I\'m afraid I can\'t let you go. Neither of you.\"

And that\'s that. Captain Roake turns his back on the two of them now, calling the Lieutenant back onto the bridge, ordering him and the guards to take them back to the brig until he can figure out what to do with them.

~*~**~*~

Tex groans, leaning his head back onto the bed. He is so damn sore. And they\'re still here. And. and things are severely screwed.

Well, except for one thing. Tel, upon leaving, had mentioned something to the other guard about how it was a shame that the virus had wiped out all the audio and video systems and how they should make sure that Tex is well contained, because they didn\'t want to deal with him otherwise.

But then, Tel had also attached them both at opposite sides of the bed and Tex stares in morose gloom at his partner who is curled up at the other end, as far from Tex as he can be.

\"Hey..\" he calls out and getting no reply, pushes himself with a wince at the pain it elicits, down the bed until he can nudge Tyrin\'s ass with his foot. \"Tyr. dammit Tyr. listen to me. It\'s not what you think, buddy..\" he doesn\'t want to beg. Not yet.

He sighs then, not sure what to do if Tyrin keeps up the silent treatment. He\'s starting to wonder if his partner can even hear him. \"Look..\" he grimaces and has to pull himself back up, his arms over his head, needing to straighten once more before he dislocates a shoulder or some shit like that. \"I\'m sorry.. I\'m so sorry. It was a stupid try to make things better for us. And I should have done it differently. I didn\'t think that you\'d believe me and I kept thinking you\'d.. you\'d forget or you\'d be too pissed at me to get caught up in what I was saying, ya know? That you\'d figure out that I didn\'t mean it..\"

It is probably going to take a hell of a lot more than a single fucking apology. He\'s done some severe shit to his partner. Broken a tenuous trust that they\'d been making and he worries that he won\'t be able to forge it again. \"Tyr. at least talk to me, bud. You don\'t have to look at me or nothin. Just let me know you\'re listening, kay?\" Okay, fuck that.. he\'s begging now.

Tyrin has never felt so alone in all of his life. So hurt. So abandoned. He feels like the universe is weighing down on his heart. The heart he wanted to give to Tex. The heart that believed they\'d go through everything together. That stupid heart of his. Damn it. He\'s doing it all over again. So stupid! Tyrin is just so dumb it isn\'t even funny.

He doesn\'t move when Tex nudges him. He can\'t talk. He\'s scared that if he says something now that he\'ll just start crying all over again. he doesn\'t want that. Not now. Not here.

But he does hear Tex and he doesn\'t believe his words. How can he possibly? How can Tex say all that he said, even when they were by themselves and not mean it? Tyrin\'s eyes close and he fights desperately the burn of tears in his eyes.

\"Please. Leave me alone,\" he whispers, trying to hide the fact that he\'s about to cry. Hiding his face away from his best friend. Or who he thought was his best friend. It\'s a damned hard slap in the face to know everything you believed wasn\'t true and then to have it all taken back. It\'s not okay. It\'s not going to be okay. Not for a while. Guess Tyrin\'ll just have to deal with it.

\"You hurt me so bad. I. I was just.\" And he stops right there, curling more into himself soft sounds coming from him, like sniffles, about to burst. He\'s really completely, utterly about to explode from the pain racing through him. \"I can\'t do this right now, okay? So please just leave me be,\" quietly. Not letting the hurt and anger and anguish inside of him show. Gods all he wants to do is hit Tex. Hard. Just once. Because love is staring Tex in his eye. And it\'s like he just. refuses to see it.

Tex nods, stilling. Shit. He\'s gonna have to work on this. \"Sure.. sure Tyrin..\" careful to use his partner\'s name, not to use anything like partner or bud or anything that might cause more pain. He\'s feeling like he\'ll be tiptoeing for a helluva a long time if they get out of this alive.

No.. when they get out of this alive.

\"Just. just listen to me when we get to time to break out, okay? I don\'t want you doin\' no suicide action shit, just cause yer hurt. Because I\'d be the dumbass and go back and save yer ass. I need to know you\'re gonna help us -both- get out of here alive. You don\'t have to say anything. Just.. just know that we\'re gonna get out of here and I\'ll kick yer ass if you try and stop us.\" He\'s not angry, merely defeated and not sure how to deal with all of this.

\"Cause we are gonna get out of this shit..\" he mutters and moves again because his shoulder is killing like a mo\'fo and his body aches. Its really only been a few hours since he was ganged up on.

Thing is, there\'s pains where there shouldn\'t be and he wonders about them. But not too much, cause pain is good. Not having pain is bad and he can\'t feel that numbness anywhere except in parts of his arm where the shoulder is grating against nerves. It\'s not broken, nothing like that.. but it may have been almost popped out, or it might be strained or some shit. Things are calming down and he goes over his body with a fine tooth comb, killing the hours in the cell with Tyrin\'s silence and his mental checklist of his body.

Again, Tyrin listened. It was unbearable to hear Tex\'s words. The man just doesn\'t get it. \"I would die for you, Tex. Don\'t you fucking get it? I would give up my life for you. I would sacrifice everything for you. You. are.\"

Tyrin stops because he doesn\'t know whether Tex is really his friend anymore. He doesn\'t know whether he should even be saying this. Giving another piece of his heart for Tex to break. But it has to be said. \"... the only friend I have. And... I... can\'t bear seeing you hurt. I can\'t stand it. I can\'t. I\'m... I\'m sorry for caring so much. I\'m sorry. I... just.\"

Tyrin\'s throat seems to close up on him as sobs catch there like a lion stuck inside its den. He wants to say so much because this is the time to say it. This is the right time. Before it\'s too late. But he can\'t admit how he feels. How much he genuinely loves his partner.

\"You don\'t have to give me your sympathy anymore. You don\'t have to feel sorry for me. I won\'t do anything stupid.\"

Tyrin begins to shiver. Just a mix of things. fear. Cold. Pain. All of that. and he can\'t really move now. everything just seemed to shut off on him from the neck down. he doesn\'t turn around. he can\'t. The chains feel like they weigh a ton and his head is still throbbing in agony.

\"You meant some of what you said didn\'t you? Tell me the truth. You would not have said it if you didn\'t mean it in your heart.. If you weren\'t thinking it. How was I supposed to feel? Just tell me and get it over with. I\'ll get over it.\" It\'s just that Tex\'s explanation was just sympathy again. Something to calm Tyrin down. To keep him from breaking apart more inside. That\'s how Tyrin felt about this. And he\'d rather Tex just keep shooting him down, instead of playing with his heart like this.

Yeah.. Tex had meant one thing. The thing about not believing any word he was going to say. But he isn\'t sure that telling Tyrin that right now, in this time and place is so smart. The last thing he needs is Tyrin to turn this into a guilt trip or some shit like that. And besides, that would mean all the other feelings Tyrin is feeling would just. dissapear. And because Tex has been through shit like this before, he knows that Tyrin needs to feel those too. In fact, maybe more than a few of them.

He takes a chance. \'Yeah.. fuck yeah.. I meant some of it..\" looking away, praying for Tyrin to forgive him later. He needed Tyrin angry, angry at him, at the world. Then maybe they\'d have a chance. So he meant it. Meant that one thing, and he\'s not going to say what he meant, not yet. When they get out, then he\'ll say it. But until then..

\"When we get out of here, just know I\'m going to kick your fucking ass.\" Tyrin groans and then offers a weak laugh before falling totally quiet now, closing his eyes because the light makes his head hurt more.

\"I figure I\'m due for a good ass kicking..\" Tyrin smirks painfully and closes his eyes. \"Shit.. just.. just get some sleep. I know.. I know that we\'re. just. \"

He sighs. \"Just.. try and trust me to.. to.. shit.\" He doesn\'t want to take any of the power of anger from Tyrin. But he does need him to trust him. \"Just.. know that I want us both to get out of this alive, kay? And that I\'ll do anything to do it.\" He says it dead pan, not hinting at the strong feeling there. Anything. And really, it\'s not both of them getting out. It\'s just Tyrin. Because Tyrin deserves it.

Fuck.

Tyrin simply closed his eyes after that. He... he couldn\'t say anything else. Maybe Tex was just. right maybe. Maybe Tex had a point about everything he said back there. Damn - what a wake up call. He didn\'t ask any questions, didn\'t ask what the plan was, didn\'t say another thing. Just... closed his eyes and took it like a man and shut the rest of the world out for now. He doesn\'t trust Tex. Not like that. He trusts the man enough to get them out of this shit they\'re in, but that\'s about it. Thank the gods he didn\'t get in too deep. didn\'t truly tell Tex of his -true- or what he thought was true feelings. Damn. He might as well have died.

But even as his heart is breaking all over again, even as he begins to hate Tex from the bottom of his bleeding heart, Tyrin is beginning to think. To really fucking think about things. Think about this ship. About that captain. About what the captain was saying. His eyes slip open again and slowly, he pulls himself up into a sitting position, not looking over at Tex at all. but pondering things. Even as his head throbs out of his fucking skull right now.

Tex, on the other hand, has rolled over onto his side, his eyes closing, trying like hell to get some sleep. Dammit, he feels like a first class shit, right now, and the last thing he needs is to consider that too deeply, because he\'ll start crying or some shit like that. And Tex may be a man of many things, but he sure as fuck doesn\'t cry. He hasn\'t cried since he was little, since before his life turned upside down.

\"I know the Lieutenant..\" he sighs into the bundle of blankets against his face, he\'s tucked his arm in against them and buries his nose into the crook of his elbow, needing something to get him through this. \"Teledar. He\'s.. he was, rather, Suzanna\'s brother. He\'s a shit, but he\'ll... help. We got inside help, maybe. If we play our cards right.\"

\"Hmmm,\" Tyrin said softly in return, finally looking over at Tex, who he knew was in a lot of pain right now. Gods. as much as he wants to fucking punch Tex\'s lights out, he just couldn\'t do it. Not now. Man this whole thing is messed up. All of it is. And the fact that the blonde was someone from Tex\'s past doesn\'t exactly sit well with him either. but. ah, well. He has connections in this shit hole, so be it. Tyrin will make sure not to get in the way this time. On his own soul. Never again.

He can\'t sleep, his side aches and he realizes that he must have a cracked rib or two, his breathing hurting too, now that he\'s coming down from the extreme adrenaline rush. \"Fuck.. wish he\'d given me some pain pills.\" and then, lower.. \"Night Tyr. \"

\'Sorry. I\'m so sorry.\' But Tex can\'t say that aloud. Maybe never say it. Maybe Tyr will never know and if things go according to his plan, later tonight, he won\'t have to care. Because he\'ll be dead.

\"All right,\" Tyrin says, but doesn\'t return the persimmons Tex gave him. It\'s not going to be a good night and he knows for sure he\'s not going to sleep now. Something\'s not right. Not right at all. It\'s a hunch and Tyrin doesn\'t get \'em often.

But Tex\'s breathing eases off, into sleep.. or something near enough that it can\'t be seen as anything different. The lights are dim in their cell, almost nonexistent, only the damper lights at the edge of the room, putting everything into an eerie green color. Tex is going to sleep. his mind already knowing when he\'ll wake. It wont\' be long, his sleeping, only an hour or two, but it will help him keep his edge on. And he\'s going to fucking need that edge when it comes time to slip out of his cuffs and get out the door, get Tyrin off of the ship.

Tyrin sat there and he watched. he couldn\'t possibly sleep with all that was going on in his head. But he watched Tex. He watched him. hated him and loved him at the same time. Damn it. so many feelings too many. Why couldn\'t this be over for crying out fucking loud. Tyrin couldn\'t deny how absolutely tired he was. he could fall out right now and not even think about it. But then, too much was going through his brain. Like how the hell he was going to get to Owen\'s suit. he didn\'t even want to think about what\'s happened to it since he parked it right outside. He\'s thinking about that war between Earth and that moon. He\'s thinking about..

How absolutely cold he feels inside right now. he wraps his arms around his knees and brings them up to his chest, again looking blankly down at the fabric of his pants, left alone with his thoughts as he waits for Tex to wake again.

~*~**~*~

Lt. Livindian reenters the captain\'s quarters and reports, his face pale. Things are definitely going down the wrong path, so to speak. Howard wasn\'t always the brightest of kids back when Tel knew him and if he\'s done something really stupid, then he and his partner could be killed by this sadistic bastard of a captain.

If he is sadistic.. or a bastard that is.. something whispers inside and Tel ignores it.

\"Sir..\" he lets his hand flick out in greeting, \"the prisoners are chained once more in the room. The men are.. requesting to visit them, sir,\" he manages to get out. He\'d be saying not to, only that maybe if they kept the two young men as toys for the rest of the ship, they might last longer and he needs whatever time he can make so that he can get them free without blowing his cover.

Privyn was sitting at his desk, staring out into the stars when Tel comes in and he simply nods to the report, sitting back in his chair as he folds hands over one another in front of his face. \"Thank you very much, Tel. Hmm. I told you my crew is insatiable.\" The captain laughs, though it is seemingly preoccupied with other things.

\"Those two are mercenaries, aren\'t they?\" It was a question that was more rhetorical than anything, since he knew the answer already. \"I may just have a job for them.\"

Tel is calm, still pale, and glad that his captain is not looking at him, afraid that somehow something would show on his face. Problem with Privyn is that you\'re never sure just what he knows. The guy is an incredible bully one moment and the next, scary as all get out with some insight he lets slip.

\"Mm.\" He nods assent. They had been working as protection so that\'s close enough. It all depends on how you look at the word. And what Tel does know, Privyn already does as well through the doctor; that Tex was a whore as a kid, that he\'s still got a rep down on dark side and that he\'s been off the market for a few years now but done a job now and then. It is what makes the fact that Privyn states about his crew almost.. understandable. Of course, that is.. if Privyn wasn\'t a cold hearted bastard.

And if Tel could trust his heart to explain to him why he can\'t seem to see straight when it comes to the mad man gazing out at the stars.

\"What work, sir?\" calmly taking the next topic up. Tel hasn\'t been told he can be at ease, but Privyn doesn\'t always tell you to be at ease. And sometimes you think that if he did and you were when he doesn\'t want you to be, you\'ll be lambasted for not reading his mind. Tel\'s given up trying to read the man. He\'s instead, concentrated on his mission.

\"Tel. Come in and sit down,\" Privyn says smoothly, turning in the chair, letting the bliding lightness of his eyes wash over his Lt.. He\'s just so beautiful. Privyn knew it from the moment he saw the boy. Blonde hair. blue eyes. Pale as milk.Slim. Oh gods, he\'s gorgeous. he can\'t help how his body reacts when the boy is in the same room. Ah, if the times were different.

Fingers laced and resting neatly on his desk, looking at his officer with quiet wonder. \"You don\'t like me do you? Speak freely now, because you might not get that chance later. You don\'t agree with what I\'m doing?\" A light tilt of his head and the shiny platinum of his hair, flies easily against his head, settling perfectly once again against his features. Such beautiful features. soft now. genle, pondering as well. But utterly sensual without meaning to be so.

Teledar steels himself and follows the order, settling into his chair, his eyes hard as he stares out of the window, into the stars beyond. He rarely looks at his captain. He stares into nothing, looking out windows. Only when he must or when decorum demands it. Other than that, he\'d rather look elsewhere, away from the man.

Why?

Fuck, who knows. And he\'s not about to find out. He\'s got a mission to complete.

Of course, being asked if he likes the man doesn\'t help. He doesn\'t go into detail, doesn\'t think about it, rather he shrugs slightly. \"Sir, it is not my job to like or dislike you. I only am to follow you..\" and that is the truth, because he tries to stick to the truth as much as he is able. To do otherwise would be to compromise more of his self than he\'s willing to throw out there. Of course, they\'re half truths. He\'s been ordered to be loyal, to follow, by the command on Earthside. That\'s the difference, that\'s the other half. The Senate\'s hold on Privyn\'s Lieutenant.

\"You know. My father is the one who took the stand when the government first came to that moon. He\'d worked those mines all of his life. From the time he was able to walk. His hands were the ones that bled from the tools and the rock. he was the one who suffered pain everyday of his life and still was able to take time out for my mother and sister and me.\" Privyn sighs softly, standing his from his feet and walking over to the window, looking out at the war ridden home beyond.

Tel does look slightly shocked at the man as the story of his father comes out into the open. But Privyn isn\'t the head of the mission, is he? He thought that was Gallagher, crazy, half mad Gallagher and his cronies. And he\'d figured that Privyn was his way to Gallagher, a way to put down the insane dictator-like head of the mines.

It wasn\'t that he was against the uprising. In fact, the more he\'s been here, the more he\'s seen that the miners are a good bunch of guys, trying like hell to live their lives as best as they are able, overrun by distant politics and needing a shot at having a say in what happens in their lives. Overtaxed and overworked, they really need a good person to stand up for them.

Of course, he realizes, they have had that. Isadora Parkins was doing all sorts of lobbying for them, but she was one of those eco-crazies in the eyes of most folks. And while she really isn\'t overreacting, he\'s discovered, most of Earth believes she is. So maybe the only way, or the easiest way, would be to get their independence. It\'s like the old U.S. and the English way back when. They need their own government.

Except they don\'t need Gallagher and Tel had finally decided that he\'d help put down Gallagher and maybe help Isadora and put in his own ten cents. There could be a hearing and they could talk about what was going on, and maybe the interstellar community would become more aware and then the moon would be given well earned independence. They\'d be free and they\'d not have to put Gallagher out of his place after they were free, which was what they\'d have to do.

But. if Privyn was the one behind it all? What if.. Gallagher wasn\'t the main guy?

Or is he just thinking all cockeyed?

\"They killed him. The bastards shot him in cold blood. Right in front of my sister and mother. Said some shit like thanks for doing all the work. Now it\'s time for us to collect. When they did that.\" Privyn pauses and turns around to look at his Lt., the look on his face rather sad, but it\'s a very quick look before the mask of calm is back on him.

\"When they fucking did that. I lost it. I just... I had to do this. For him and for everyone one like him. Do you think I\'m wrong for this?\"

\"Sir?\" confusion on the lieutenant\'s face, he can\'t keep the fear and the startlement out of his voice and expression. \"I.. I thought Gallagher was.. in charge..\" softly. Because who would have thought that.. the guy in charge would be at the front lines. Nah.

What if Privyn IS Gallagher? Teledar\'s trained mind is running over the choices. No one had seen the guy, only seen his henchmen. They knew he was crazy because.. well.

Did they know? Dammit! This is not the time for doubts!!

\"Why would you ask me something like that Lt?\" There was a small amount of suspicion in Privyn\'s voice, but not enough to make him catch Tel in anything... yet.

There was no more time for talk for the moon. They -tried- talking. Halidan Earth didn\'t want to - talk. They never lifted a hand in helping the colonists mine that moon. They never helped with supplies. Never helped with aid. Never lifted finger with equipment. The colonists have begged for these things only to be turned away and in the end, they found out that many valuable commodities have been gathered. and they have the right to take it. Pure greed.

\"No. Gallagher has nothing to do with me. I have nothing to do with that idiot. He\'s a different story all together. He\'s someone we need to deal with on our own. the colony itself. This is between the colony itself and earth, understand?\"

\"Yessir,\" Teledar demurs immediately. \"I\'m sorry sir. It was just a thought, sir..\"

What HAD gotten into him? The idea that it had been Privyn had almost dropped his gut ten stories and at the words that it\'s not Gallagher.. that Privyn isn\'t Gallagher and that Privyn sees Gallagher as a threat too, well, suffice it to say that he flushes and his heart skips a beat.

This isn\'t normal. None of this has been normal. It hasn\'t been normal from the beginning, from when he first had seen the ship he was assigned to. No, not the ship, the ship\'s captain.

He drops his gaze and because of the pounding of his heart, can\'t seem to make his mind work as well as it should. \"It\'s just, sir. that you said that you\'d had to do this.. it sounded like it was you. instigating it. I mean, not that that would have been wrong, sir, considering what has happened,\" and he finds, to his astonishment, that he means every word of that, \"it\'s just that if you had, then .. I mean, I haven\'t seen Gallagher and he\'s kind of a mystery to us .. well me, mostly, and it crossed my mind that maybe .. you. were. him.\" he is red faced now, standing up and looking so out of place, confused almost. Why had he let that much come out? Why had it mattered all that much that his captain would understand?

And how is he going to walk out of here with both legs unbroken after Privyn puts together the insult behind those words? That he would have been the crazy half mad dictator type that Gallagher was? It was insane! And a man with the pride as Privyn has proven himself to be over and over again.

\"I\'m truly sorry, sir.. for not. believing in you, sir..\" he hasn\'t been told to stand up, not to bow, and now he\'s backing away, out. mainly because his mind is telling him to flee fast, or he\'ll spill everything and not think twice.
Privyn sighs. \"I can understand why you would think that. But understand this. Gallagher is a mad man who is just out for money. He might as well live on Earth for as much as he cares about the miners. And no. I didn\'t instigate anything. I was appointed by Senator Isadora. Seems this is the only way those fuckers will listen to us. She didn\'t really want to do it this way. Obviously. But. The time for talk is over Lt. We tried that. It didn\'t work. So yes, she appointed me to put together an army, and make a weapon that will cause the most damage with the least amount of casualties. You see. We\'re not out to murder anyone. That\'s not what we\'re trying to do.

The name Isadora stills Teledar and he stares, then schools his expression. Politics. He can deal with politics. He\'s always done so, has ever dealt with them, so why not deal with them here as well? Still - it was . better than he\'d thought. If the Senate knew, on Earth, that he\'s hand in hand with the mining rebellion\'s strategic head, they\'d have puppies they\'d be so damn happy.

So why isn\'t he happy? And why can\'t he stop asking himself such stupid ass questions?

\"I\'m upset, yes,\" Privyn nods. \"I\'m quite upset. But I don\'t have the kind of power to start a war. We\'re all human beings here, but we -do- want Earth to see what it\'s like to have their livelihood taken away. And we\'ve found a way to do that.\"

Privyn looks on his beautiful Lt with a soft smile, walking slowly over to a seat next to the young blonde before sitting, leaning back in his chair. \"Earth thrives on murdering each other. Just like they murdered my father and countless others on that moon. just to be spiteful. As you can see. We\'ve had no casualties here. Not even Mr. Heesemen. I do admit that I wanted him dead, yes. But that was because he became a liability. You know that as well as I.

The blonde lieutenant watches his captain approach, he stiffens but he does not move away, only keeps his eyes tight and focused on the man who sits down near him and touches his chin as if he\'s considering options, not as if he\'s got them all worked out already.

\"Now, I want to give him a second chance after we get this rust bucket fixed. However, I don\'t think I\'ll be able to convince him and his fiery young friend to help me get this ship and the weapon to our destination. Which is why I called you.\" Captain Roake smiles with a light glow to his eyes as a thin, gloved hand taps against his chin.

\"Do you think you can convince them to escort this ship to the LaVia Quadrant?\"

Weapon? Damage? And.. LaVia? Why...

He\'s tired of questions beginning with the word \"why.\"

\"If that\'s your command, sir, I\'ll do my best. But.. if I may .. be.. frank?\" Tel stammers it, feeling that he\'s already been given too much leniency as it is and that he\'s definitely pushing his luck. \"I think that.. Tex might be.. umm.. better if he knew all of this? If you.. or I.. told him all this? He might.. umm.. even help, sir.\"

Not a chance in hell. Not after Privyn let his men rape Tex. Tel is loathe to say it but - \"It might be a bit more difficult to get him to trust you sir. You did allow your men to.. umm.. take advantage of him, sir, and his past. he\'s been out of the business for.. well sir, they did rough him up badly, past just doing what they did to him..\" Teledar blushes, feeling ashamed, he can\'t even say it!

\"Yes. yes that\'s true. That\'s definitely true. Ah, well. So, tell me. What should I do with them, then?\" Raising a brow at the prudish boy. Privyn found it quite adorable to say the least.

The captain stands again, walking back over to the window and watching the stars once again as they stay where they are. Just lifeless lights out there. \"I was. actually thinking of letting them go if there was nothing they could do for us. It was a big mistake on my part. I had to punish him for breaking onto my ship though. Better than death I\'m guessing, right? Yes. Just do that. Tell them the situation. If they help wonderful. if not, send them both packing. got it? No use in doing anything really stupid , right?\"

Okay, so maybe it had been Tel\'s wishful thinking, thinking he doesn\'t even realize until now, that it hadn\'t been Privyn\'s order. That it had been the orders of that cock eyed, freaky ship\'s doctor they had. That somehow, the entire plan hadn\'t been something Privyn would do. Because it bordered on the inhumane and something in Tel didn\'t want to think of Privyn as inhumane. He wanted Privyn to be someone he could follow - someone he could agree with - someone he could turn against Earth-Senate commands and not think twice about if it was right or wrong.. - someone he could... could...

No why questions. Stay away from those. Dangerous for a soldier.

\"Yessir..\" he murmurs, quietly, and turns, going to the door.

Then, suddenly resigned to his actions before taking them, he stops. He\'s already dug enough holes, what could one more hurt? \"Sir?\" turning at the door, hand holding it slightly open. \"To some men, men like Howard I mean, death would have been a far nicer fate..\" he ducks his head again. \"Sir,\" in his most polite of tones, and stalks out.

He takes a breath as the captain\'s door closes. He would give Tex and his partner a chance, because they had to be sleeping. And in five hours, he\'d go and talk to them. Maybe they\'d work with him. Maybe they\'d help him. Cause heaven knows, he needs help. He\'s never felt so lost, and all because of a pair of eyes.

Now where had that come from? He shakes himself mentally, and goes to his work with a frown creasing his forehead.

((next chapter: escape and capture!!))