Abyss

Chapter 10: The line begins to blur

From that morning on, Ayve somehow seemed to be filled with a new energy. He allowed Pheus to take him down to the water and wash his body. Again and again he tried to move without help, to make his weak limbs yield to his will. Pheus hurt from merely watching Ayve collide with his physical limits over and over, but the nymph simply ignored defeats and tried once more.

Seeing Ayve struggle like this made Pheus put aside his own desires. He felt it would not be right to approach Ayve with his sexual needs, now. The man was still too weak and too much caught up in other matters.

Ayve’s changed attitude towards Pheus helped. Since Pheus had brought him his father’s ring, Ayve had discarded of the offish behaviour towards him. He was still closed-up and seldom sent a message into Pheus’ mind, but he did not shrink back when Pheus touched him. When Pheus pulled him into an embrace in the evenings in front of the fire, Ayve was like a puppet, just resting against his chest the way Pheus positioned him, his eyes falling shut.

Pheus awoke to an empty cave. “Ayve?” Pushing away the hides, he got up to look outside. No sign of the delicate man. Pheus grew alarmed. Lately, his patient had gained the strength to take several short walks a day; however, he had never done so alone.

Pheus concentrated to sense him in the area. After a moment, he located him in the distance. Close to where he knew the other surviving nymphs were hiding. A strange feeling arose in him. A possessive feeling. Why had Ayve not told him? Why had he gone away on his own?

He rushed off, to see what was going on.

Seya sat speechless by the fire, staring incredulously at the haggard man that cradled the bowl of warm tea he had presented him with in his bony, slightly shaking hands. His visitor was exhausted. What astonished Seya more, however, was that Ayve was alive. How was that possible? He could not avert his eyes from the yellowish gleaming ring on the shivering hand.

Sadness took hold of him. The memory of what that ring had once symbolised – continuance, security, hope. Yes, it was the knowledge of what he should be feeling that aggrieved him. Seya should find new hope in the face of the return of a fellow nymph, in the face of the return of the most valued heirloom on Ayve’s finger, of the most valued knowledge and skills in Ayve’s mind - but he could not bring himself to do so. All he saw was a broken man that had never really belonged to his people in the first place.

With time, the shivering in his visitor ebbed away. Have you heard of any of the travellers? Seya suddenly perceived a voice in his mind. He looked into the peregrine eyes that had opened now to gaze at him. They waited for him to answer.

Startled, he answered in the negative. It was true; there had been several young nymphs absent during the attack. As was custom, they had been sent to get to know the world on their own, gather experience, learn to take care of themselves. It had even been an unusually large number of nymphs. Still, he had not seen any of them since. Perhaps they had been intercepted on their way back…The idea was terrifying.

Have you looked for them? Ayve asked on.

Seya stared dumbfound at him. “We are happy to be alive and undetected,” he declared as if that was ample justification for not doing so.

Heavy footsteps resounded close to their hideout. Seya rose worriedly.

Pheus steadied his pace as he approached the little nymph gathering. He grimaced in disgust, but thought better of it and settled on what he guessed to be a neutral facial expression.

The blond jumped up as if Pheus caught him in an improper act and stared at him anxiously. Ayve in turn rose calmly, made the usual gesture of farewell to his host, and turned towards Pheus.

They walked a few moments together, away from the nymphs, before Pheus could not contain himself anymore. “What did you want from him?” he ground out.

Ayve eyed him appraisingly. I have responsibility, he justified his action calmly.

“Responsibility? Why? What did they do for you? I was the one who helped you. They sat half a day’s walk away from you for ages and did nothing!” Barely suppressed annoyance resonated in his voice.

Ayve directed his gaze into the distance, as if to brush aside what Pheus had said.

Pheus seized Ayve on the arm and yanked him around.

Wide eyes stared at him.

“Ayve, keep away from them,” Pheus pleaded with him. “They have nothing for you. Let’s leave all this behind.”

The thin arm tried to get free from his grip, but it was easy for Pheus to hold on to it. Let me go, Ayve’s silent voice demanded.

“I’m not going to make the same mistake twice, Ayve. Don’t you understand why I’m here?”

A sudden invisible blow threw him backwards. Before Pheus realised what had happened, Ayve was gone. A strange mixture of rage and disappointment welled up in him. After a moment, it was fought by dread. Aye was no violent, no aggressive person. He would never do anything to affront Pheus. If he had resorted to actually using his mental powers against him, Pheus had obviously evoked fear in the nymph. Who knew what he had reminded him of?

The light from the early afternoon sun that was reflected by the river blinded Pheus temporarily as he gazed over to the other side, where Ayve rested beside a huge rock. He had given him a bit time to calm down before he had looked for him. The agile man took off the hides that were wrapped around his feet and waded through the water to sit down a few metres away from his companion. He waited for a reaction, yet the nymph showed none.

Ayve watched the water travel along the river bed, flow around stones. Birds bathed on the river bank. He looked exhausted.

Pheus moved a little closer to him. To his horror, Ayve jumped up in alarm and expanded the distance between them again. Pheus fought hard to reign in his pride that threatened to make a scene. Ayve must know that he was no threat!

After a while that he utilised to pull himself together, he used his mental voice to speak. I did not intend to hurt you. I merely wanted you to listen to me.

No reply. The only picture that Pheus found in Ayve’s mind was that of him sitting where he now sat. As if the other man had wiped it clean, refused to think anything at all. The sunlight softened his pale features. There was a circle of light reflected on his dark hair. Pheus wanted to pull him close, to smell his sun-warmed hair and skin. What was happening with Ayve? What was going on in his companion? Pheus had often been rough; he could well remember the times when he had taken Ayve hard, passionately. The other man had never complained. And now this. It was worse than Ayve’s initial insecurity, his shyness. Ayve’s behaviour insinuated that Pheus was a threat to him, despite everything he had done for the nymph.

Had he hurt the other man by not standing by him? Was Ayve punishing him? Ayve. I… Should he make amends? Admit that he had been wrong? Pheus did not think along such lines, but if that was what Ayve wanted to hear, he had no problem saying it. I should not have let you go on your own. I missed you.

There was a pained expression on Ayve’s face for a moment before he turned it away, the short flickering of a sweet yearning inside the man. Then everything was wiped clean once more.

Ayve?

The fragile being glanced over to him but could not meet his eyes. It’s too late.

No. It’s not. Give it a try. Let us start from the beginning, build up a new life together, just the two of us. I don’t intend to return to them. Father sent me to fetch you back, but I took it as a chance to take you up on your suggestion. You asked me to go with you. Here I am.

Silence. I told you…, Ayve’s voice was muted, subdued. In the other man’s mind, Pheus saw the image of a young female nymph in Ayve’s arms, quite a beautiful lady. He could tell what that meant. The picture changed. Pheus saw Ayve’s bloodstained father again, short flashes of pain. It took his companion a while to find words. It’s too late. I promised my father to look after the others. I need to find them.

Pheus made his decision in one heartbeat. There was no alternative. He had travelled too far along this road already. Then we will find them. If that is the task you have to fulfil before you can commit yourself to something else, I will help you.

Ayve’s voice was even weaker. A mere whisper. You should better seek for what you want elsewhere. I have nothing to offer to you.

Pheus smirked darkly. That is my decision. You know you need my help.

With a very soft, high clicking noise Ayve conceded that Pheus was right. He needed him.

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