The Adventures of Josie

Two weeks later

Josie went home the weekend before the test and tried desperately to study but it was impossible since all her old friends wanted to hang out. Linda had to work Sunday night so she brought Josie back to job corps earlier than usual. Josie brought her stuff to her room and went to lunch. At this time on a Sunday afternoon only about 25% of the students were on campus. Josie made a salad and sat down at a table to eat. Chris and Brian joined her but she only acknowledged Chris. Afterwards the three of them went outside the cafeteria and sat at one of the picnic tables to smoke a cigarette. The staff was pretty lenient on weekends about smoking so they didn’t go up the hill to the smoking area. They hung out outside the cafeteria for about 45 minutes before they locked the doors and stopped serving lunch. Chris got up from the table saying he had a video game to beat and walked off.

“Time out!” Brian said. Josie shook her head and stood to leave. Brian jumped up from the table and caught her arm.

“Against the rules.” Josie said.

“I just called time out so stop it.” Brian said. Josie noted that he actually seemed mad. She decided it was a good time to stop ignoring him.

“Whats up Brian?” she asked cautiously.

“Come here.” he said, pulling her down some stairs to a basement door.

“Where are we going?”

“Just right here.”

“To this door?” Josie asked unbelievingly. “Not through it?”

“Yea just right here. Sit down.” he said, pointing to the stairs. Josie sat halfway down the stairs and Brian stood at the bottom. Josie looked at him and raised an eyebrow. “You lost weight?” he said more than asked.

“I don’t know. I haven’t weighed myself since the physical when I got here.”

“Yea but you’ve lost some weight.” he said. “You look better.”

“Healthier?” Josie asked, Brian didn’t seem mad anymore so she went back to her smart ass remarks.

“You still smoke.”

“Are you saying I look cuter?” she asked.

“No.” he said firmly. “Damnit Josie!” he exclaimed, grabbing her shoulders and standing her up in front of him. He didn’t even give Josie a chance to think as he lowered his mouth to hers and wrapped his arms around her. Once Josie figured out what was happening, she pushed Brian away from her. Brian couldn’t help but notice she looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Josie wrapped her arms around herself and tried to think of something to say. “You hate me…” she stammered after a minute.

“Yes. You’ll talk to anyone but me, I feel like I don’t even exist in your presence, I mean, I could set you on fire and you wouldn’t even look at me. And then I have to sit on my fucking bench while you hug and flirt with every other guy that comes near you, and you wont even acknowledge me! You make me feel like I’m nothing.”

“Like you were inferior to me?” Josie asked incredulously.

“Yea, was that what you were going for?” he asked angrily.

“Not at all. I ignore you because I know you hate it. You feeling inferior is a complete bonus.”

“So you’re really trying to make me hate you?”

“I don’t know.” she said, sitting down. Brian sat down beside her. “That whole day or two that we were on speaking terms was horrible for me. And it seemed like everything bad that had happened was your fault. And that’s not even including the whole eating thing. Do you realize how embarrassed I was having people watch me eat? Jackie listens at the bathroom door now to make sure I’m not making myself puke. Jackie still watches me eat and Mr. K asks what I ate for lunch everyday, its terrible. I just wanted it all to stop. You were on my bad side.”

“Were? That’s past tense isn’t it?”

“I’ve been ignoring you so you haven’t had a chance to be on my bad side lately.”

“Not totally ignoring me… you’ve acknowledged me a few times.”

“When?” Josie asked. Only time she’d acknowledged him was when there was a time out called.

“You want me to remind you?”

“Suddenly, I don’t think so.”

“But you don’t remember-”

“Stop. Whats this all about and why the fuck did you kiss me?”

“I don’t know, I just had to.” he said.

“Brian, the only thing I ever asked of you was not to touch me.”

“Why do you hate me touching you?”

“I hate everyone touching me.”

“I don’t believe that. I watch you hug a hundred people a day.”

“Yea but I know they’re going to hug me and that’s all. I have advanced warning. You never give me any.”

“Josie what happened to you?” Josie stood up, wrapped her arms around herself again and paced for a minute. She’d never told anyone before; nobody had ever asked. She looked at Brian, trying to decide if she should tell him or run. He got up and stood in front of her so she couldn’t pace anymore. Josie looked up at him and he saw the tears glimmering in her eyes. “Josie, I’m going to hug you.” he said, taking her in his arms. Josie blinked back the tears, she was never, ever going to cry in front of Brian, even if he wasn’t the cause. “When I was little he used to just grab me.” Josie whispered. “Who?” Brian asked. He felt Josie tense and she answered so quietly he almost didn’t hear her say “My dad”. Brian held her for a few minutes before she pushed him away. She turned to walk up the steps but he stopped her.

“When you were little? He stopped?”

“I haven’t seen him in 10 years.”

“Josie, I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“I know that. There’s nothing for you to be sorry about. But now that you do know, don’t touch me.”

“No. I can touch you with warning.” he said, stepping closer. “Josie, I’m going to kiss you.”

“Why?” she asked, taking a step back when he got closer.

“I told you, I just have to, Josie. Don’t push me away” he pleaded, lowering his mouth to hers. Josie decided to be honest with herself; she didn’t want to push him away. Josie rested her hands on Brian’s chest and Brian wrapped his arms around her and deepened the kiss. Josie was more confused than ever. Sure, Brian was good looking, but that was as far as the attraction went. Brian was an asshole, plain and simple and Josie wanted to hate him, but she couldn’t. He’d made her life miserable by involving himself in every little thing since day one. Even after she’d started ignoring him she’d heard from Joe, Jay and Chris that he was always grilling them for info about what she does and who she talks to. Brian had even started calling her names to try and get her attention. They’d mostly been weight related but they’d never really bothered Josie. Josie had been a few pounds overweight her whole life and having been the target of bullies for years she had thick skin. Of course, she’d never fully ignored Brian. No, she wouldn’t look at him or talk to him unless a time out was called but she never stopped listening to him. Every time she was within hearing of Brian her ears automatically went to him and whatever conversation he was having. Most of the time he was just the same old Brian but a few times she’d actually caught him being nice; explaining to a classmate a proper cooking procedure, helping a new recruit with their luggage. Seeing the nice Brian left her amazed and speechless, like the kiss they were sharing. Brian pulled back eventually, but he didn’t let Josie go. He looked down at her, amused, while she caught her breath.

“You didn’t push me away.” he said smugly.

“I didn’t really want to.” Josie answered, deciding if she was going to be honest with herself she might as well be honest with him.

“That’s good because you are a horrible kisser. We gotta work on that.” Josie tried to argue but the words were smothered when Brian planted his mouth on hers.