rate_review Reviews

Hey, to attract readers you must have a title and a good summary. Your trying to expose your story so how about just titling it as Josie for right now and come up with something clever when you do think of one. Or you could title it Cigarettes and Butter, haha, my own inside joke, sorry. Experience is spell like what I just typed so take out that extra I in your summary. I'm being anal because in your profile you asked for brutal honesty in reviews.

Reviewing chapters 7-15, I knew Brian liked Josie, but, he is 21 and she's 16. The age bothers me but it's just a story so I can over look that and as long as he waits until she's 18 to further their relationship. Gosh people are so bizarre in this story and hilarious. I like how honest Brian is and Mr. K is cool. I'm glad that he isn't a pervert. Thanks for doing a massive update.

would like more please!!

Hi, from chapters 1-6, I think your story is strange and so are the characters yet I like it. Brian and Nick are both so strange but I find their oddness and neurotic behavior entertaining to read. This line made me laugh, "sitting there making bracelets while he drew a fucking hot pockets box!" Are you sure this is a school and not a psych ward, hehe, sorry if you didn't find that funny. The only constructive criticism is that there is little background information on Josie and that she was rush into this place. If Mr. K is so strict how come he didn't punish Josie for smoking a cigarette or did he forget she's only sixteen. It's interesting how detail you would go into describing the building and landscape but the characters visually is still an enigma (this is not a criticism just an interesting observation). Thanks.