Possession

I look up suddenly, meeting all too familiar brown eyes. The world abruptly disappears and it is just the two of us. There are no sounds, only the wind through the trees and the rustle of the grass between us. I feel a hitch in my throat; my voice leaves me with lips parted slightly. I lift my hand, unbelieving of what my eyes are seeing, as if to reach out for him, though I know he is already gone. Memories flash through my mind like a movie on fast forward. Smiles, laughs, faces flushed in passion"¦ Things I fear I will never see again"¦

I blink and his gaze slips away. Hands buried deep within his pockets as he turns slowly away. I can barely breathe around the painful lump in my throat. He hesitates only a brief moment, gaze slipping back to me sidelong before the chocolate brown eyes close and he turns away completely. A sob escapes my throat and my fingers slowly curl into my palm as the world returns and he disappears into the crowd.

I have waited what seems forever to see him again, and now, there he was, standing not ten feet away"¦ and I could not stop him from leaving"¦ I feel my arms wrap around myself tightly, but it is too surreal, like perhaps they are his arms and not mine. I close my eyes and fight the tears that threaten once again. It has been so long.

My breath is caught in my throat. I can't speak, can't even tell him how I feel as he leaves. I shake my head as if the action will free my voice from where it sticks in my throat. Before I know what is happening, I stumble after him. The tears stream freely down my face now. I don't care. Let him see how much he has hurt me, let him see the things my pride refuses to let me say. I finally reach him and grasp his shoulder, turning him roughly around. Before he can protest, I literally throw myself into his arms and wrap mine around his neck, pressing my lips to his, letting him taste my tears. I feel a hitch; a sob escape and my eyes slowly open. I am no longer the only one crying"¦

There were many before him in my life: some took a piece of me with them when they left, others I took part of them with me. Never before had I lost my heart completely to someone"¦ never before had my heart shattered at the knowledge that I would never kiss his lips, feel his breath on my skin, his strong arms around me in the middle of the night. I sobbed into the kiss, taking in a deep breath and tasting the minthis his lips. I did not want to hear his excuses for leaving, I wanted only this moment, this kiss"¦

Finally pulling apart, both of us flushed and gasping for air, I meet his dark brown eyes and offer a small smile. The look I find there is sad"¦ Almost fearful"¦ The last thing I saw in his eyes"¦ I reach up and wipe the tears from his eyes, leaning up to kiss them away. He gives me a small smile then, wiping my own tears away with a large hand. I sob, not sure if I should be feeling elated or despondent over what I see.

Both our tears now gone, he kisses me softly again, a small smile gracing his visage, and pulls away. I open my mouth to say something, what I am not exactly sure, I am still confused as to what is going on. The emotions in his eyes"¦ relief, sadness, regret, happiness, pain"¦ So many things that run through my mind like an endless riddle with no true answer except to the one who wrote it.

A slightly calloused finger is set gently against my lips and the emotions cloud over in his eyes. The slightest shake of his head gives me my answer. I bite my lip as he traces it slowly, I can see the memories playing in his eyes as he smiles sadly again. His gaze meets mine and he mouths the same words he said to me last"¦.

I'm sorry"¦.

A sob escapes my throat as he turns and glances at me once more before walking away again. The familiar feeling of having something torn from my being erupts through me, and the tears b to to flow freely now. I couldn't stop them if I wanted to. Sinking to the ground, I hug myself tightly and dip my chin to my chest, sobbing quietly, letting the earth soak up my sorrows.

~Owari~