My Misery
My Misery
My Misery
I’m angry, moody and utterly depressed
There a deep pain inside of my chest
I’m snappy and churlish even when I smile
My good god, I feel completely vile.
I look up from my computer and sigh
Cringing at how few hours have gone by
Why can’t this day ever fucking end?
How much longer do I have to pretend?
I swear I don’t mean to be this way
I didn’t wake up with cruel intent today
It’s just too hard to fake it right now
I just need some time to figure this out
Today is a day when everything is wrong
When not even blasting hard core songs
Can brighten up this melancholy mood
I just wish someone had understood
Tell me I’m pretty and I’ll call you a liar
Tell me I’m sexy and I’ll say it’s only desire
I care not for your pretty lies
When all I see, it what I despise
My typical vices hold no pleasure
My emotions and mind need to be severed
I need the peace of quiet solace
And yet my mind just won’t focus
Clouded and pained in misery
Just give me a lie I can believe
To wipe away from tears inside
The ones I cry when I need to hide
Tell me I’m more than good enough
Even with my messed up stuff
With my soul on edge and my mind bereft
My happiness taken in darkened theft
You see my eyes may be dry
I have no more tears to cry
For far too long have I lived this way
Just waiting for my chance to say
I’m sorry I am not what you need
I want to apologize for my misery
My endless night that I live in
My darkness that is my sins
My anger is not yours to bear
It is not because I don’t care
I’m just frustrated and alone
Needing a place to call my own
Where I can finally be free
Of this tainted misery
To finally find some peace
And be who I want to be
So please just give me some time
I promise I will be fine
Until then just hold my hand
And just try to understand
This depression is not me
It is a raging disease
And the cure from above
Is your continued love
So even if I curse and rage
Know there is another page
To the story that is me
And this fight against my misery