Don't Leave Me

 A/N: Rough sketch of the first part of the story. It's not fully edited, but any constructive feedback is appreciated.

They used to fight about petty things. Now they had “discussions” about why other people upset them. The days of getting angry with each other and having screaming matches had ended a couple of years ago when Kashmir had started seeing a therapist. Kashmir was sitting in the plush leather chair reading a book as Mark described what had upset him today. She didn’t dare interrupt him; he didn’t really want to know her opinion on the matter, but she let him vent because that was all he really wanted to do. She tried to be attentive, but she was so tired from work lately.

    

“Are you even listening to me?” Mark’s question starkly startled her back to reality.

    

“Yeah, sweetie I’m listening.” Kashmir responded after shaking her head and bringing her thoughts back to the present time.

    

“You know, I think I’d rather sleep alone tonight.” Mark was scowling and started to pack away his work supplies. Mark repaired computers for a living, and tools were always scattered about the condominium.

    

Kashmir usually knew better than to argue with Mark when he was sulking, but she didn’t want to go home by herself tonight. “It’s late and I already have all of my things ready for work in the morning Mark.”

  

 “I’m not feeling very social tonight Kash. I’ll call you tomorrow.” Kashmir knew it was a lie. He never called her when he said he would. Mark suddenly couldn’t wait for her to get out of the door. Spitefully she thought that Mark should be the one seeing a therapist for his mood swings. She started to gather her things quickly so she could leave before he started saying something hurtful. Honestly the sudden change in Mark’s attitude pissed her off, but she wouldn’t say anything; Kashmir didn’t feel like listening to him call her a crazy woman tonight.

    

Mark’s black cat Yin hissed at her as she retrieved her toiletries from the bathroom. Kashmir couldn’t stand that cat. Kash loved all animals, and all animals were affectionate to her except for Yin. Yang on the other hand constantly sat on her lap and purred. The white brother of Yin was - coincidentally - the complete opposite of the vile black cat. Yin’s yellow eyes followed her every step. Kashmir finally gathered all of her items and started for the front door.

    

Mark followed her to the entryway, presumably to lock the door behind her. He gave Kashmir an awkward hug, but as she tried to kiss him he turned his head, so Kash ended up inelegantly kissing his cheek instead.

  

 “Goodnight Mark. I love you,” Kashmir had to keep her voice from cracking. She was on the verge of tears.

    

“No, you don’t,” was his reply, but he kissed on top of the forehead like a father would kiss his little girl.

    

With tears glistening in the corners of her eyes Kashmir turned away so Mark wouldn’t be able to see them. Mark hadn’t been this despondent for a while. Kashmir’s therapist had tried telling her dozens of times not to take his behavior personally, but it was hard not to. Kash always thought his sudden mood swings were brought on by something she had done until she could rationally think things through later.

    

Kashmir walked out the door and heard the lock click into place after the door was shut. She slowly meandered towards her car. She wasn’t lying when she said she hadn’t wanted to leave. It was a cool autumn night, and the breeze billowing past blew leaves under her green Ford Focus. Finally Kashmir reached her car and used the key to open the lock. She threw her things in the backseat and stood in front of the car door with her hands on the roof of the car sobbing. She let the cool air blow her hair in her face, which hid the tears streaming down her cheeks. Composing herself she got into the car.

    

Crying had taken what little energy Kashmir had left, which made her dread the hour long drive home. Kash and Mark had been together for ten years and had only lived together for a short time before deciding to live separately. Mark preferred city living while Kashmir wanted to stay in the small village she grew up in. The two had managed to make the relationship work despite the forty mile difference between them. Kashmir stayed five nights a week at Mark’s condo and spent the weekends at her own place since Mark worked weekends anyway.

    

Kashmir worked in the city for a law firm. She was a paralegal and had been working on an extremely important case lately. It was draining most of her attention and energy. She didn’t want to have to get up an hour earlier just to drive to her office in the morning. Kash started the car and slowly backed out of the driveway. The inconvenience of having to leave for home made flashes of anger swim before her eyes. Kashmir abruptly stopped the car in the middle of the driveway. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths and the stabbing chest pain that came with the anger subsided.

    

Kashmir opened her eyes again, smiled, and thought I can do this. One thing her therapist had taught her was how to think positively and make herself feel more like a human and less like a slave chained to emotion. She finished backing out of the driveway and started to head towards the highway. There were very few cars out at this hour, so Kashmir wasn’t trapped in heavy traffic. It only took three turns and five minutes to maneuver herself onto the interstate that would lead to her home.

    

Kash turned the music on and Five Finger Death Punch blasted through her car stereo. Disgusted, she took Mark’s CD out of the player and turned the radio dial until she found an Oldies station. “Crystal Blue Persuasion” was halfway done, but Kash joined along with the lyrics anyway. A few more songs played, but Kashmir was getting too tired to sing along anymore.

    

Soon streetlights and white lines started playing tricks with Kash’s head. Images blurred together and she started to veer towards the concrete walls on the side of the highway. The rumble strips shook her from her trance; adrenaline briefly shot through her circulatory system. She shook her head a few times and thought I’m halfway home. I only need to stay awake for a little while longer.

    

Trying to ignore her droopy eyelids was getting to be an amazing task. Kash was a proud woman and refused to let a biological function control her waking hours, but the sandman was fighting hard to win this battle. Pulling over on the side of the road would be admitting defeat, and she wasn’t going to be beaten by this inconvenience. Kash turned the radio up even louder and rolled the window down, letting the brisk Autumn air produce goose pimples on her flesh. Kashmir closed her eyes one final time and her Focus once again drifted towards the concrete walls. The war against biology had been lost.

    

This time the rumble strips didn’t wake her up. Kashmir, successful business woman, girlfriend, and respected member of the community, died in a car crash when her car hit the walls at 80 miles and hour. The head-on collision broke several ribs and snapped her cervical spine during whiplash. Death was fast and almost painless when he separated Kashmir’s soul from her earthly body. Authorities would call the thirty year old woman’s death a tragedy, saying she died before her time as they pulled what little remained of her intact body from the crash site. Mark wouldn’t be informed for another two days of Kashmir’s death.