Letting Go of Control

My heart runs wild as soon as my boyfriend texts me, saying he’s here. I know he’s on his way up to my dorm room right now. My roommate has left for the weekend, and I know he’s brought all sorts of goodies from our “fun drawer” back home. I’m a little nervous. I told him a couple of days ago that I was going to let him have his way with me, all night long. I have a few rules, of course. I won’t do 69, I won’t let anything go into my butt, and I’ll give him a blowjob, but it has to be the first thing I do, and I’m only doing it once (for cleanliness).

We’ve talked a little about what’s going to happen, but I know he’s had plenty of ideas running through his head. I just hope he can step up to the plate and actually go through with things. I want to be fully dominated. He’s put me over his knee and spanked me before, and we have handcuffs and the such, but we don’t do that stuff as often as I would like. It’s important to feel like I’m still in control though, and with my boyfriend, I know I am. If something really hurts, he’ll stop. Trust is a major thing in our relationship.

James (my boyfriend) comes into my room, and draws me into a deep passionate kiss. He drops his stuff off, and with no mention of anything to come, asks me if I want to go get some dinner. We go out to eat, and we just talk about our days. Nothing about what was ahead came up. On the way back to my dorm though, I couldn’t resist. I reached over and rubbed him through his pants. He was already hard. Obviously, he has been thinking about this. He smiles at me, as he reaches over to touch me through my jeans. I’m not a big fan of him doing that while we’re driving, so I pushed his arm away, even though I was aching for his touch. “You just wait til we get upstairs,” he said. My heart started beating fast again.

We walked into the room, and he grabbed his backpack and sat down on my bed. He started digging through it. I did not really pay attention to what he was grabbing. I knew how this was going to start off. I just locked my bedroom door, and turned my music up loud enough so the neighbors wouldn’t hear any moans…or screams of pleasure. I heard a pillow hit the floor, and the sound of a zipper. I turned around just in time to watch him pull his pants and trousers off. I loved the sight of him naked. “Turn around and put your hands behind your back.” Mmm, I thought. Right down to business. Well, of course, he wanted a bj.

I did what he said. After all, why fight it when I told him that he had complete control of me tonight? He quickly tightened the handcuffs, a little tighter than usual. He gave me a light tap on my butt, and told me to turn back around. He smiled at me and gave me a sweet, comforting kiss. “I love you,” he told me. “I love you too.” I had complete trust in him. I knew this was all just fun and games. His smile faded, and a stern look replaced it. I could tell he was trying to get into character. Being demanding with me wasn’t his first nature, but being rough in bed was, so it didn’t take him too long to get in character.

“On your knees, now.” I dropped right down on my knees on that pillow he had lied down. My heart was racing. I know that I gave him this idea of tying my hands up behind my back and letting him have a blowjob his way, but the thought still scared me. My mouth wasn’t used to this, and my gag reflexes sometimes sucked. I also knew that by letting him do this, I was going to have to swallow. I was ALWAYS in control when giving him a blowjob. But, I had told him that he should start this way. I wanted him to be able to see that tonight, he could control me, and I wasn’t going to fight. I was determined to let him do what he wanted.

He sat down on my bed and spread his legs slightly apart. His cock seemed bigger at the moment. Maybe it was just because I knew I was going to have to have that in my small mouth. “You know what to do,” he said.

‘Hmm,’ maybe he won’t be so forceful with this, I thought. I leaned forward, trying to keep my balance. I stuck my tongue out and licked up and down his shaft, as if it was my favorite kind of sucker and I was trying to get all the yummy flavor from it. I did this a couple of times, then decided it was time to put it in. I gently licked around the tip, and slowly circled my tongue around his cock as I brought the whole thing into my mouth. I started the typical back and forth movements, realizing how hard it was to actually keep your balance while doing this, with hands tied behind your back.

I tried deep throating it, but it made me gag at first. I went to let go of his cock, so I could get a gulp of fresh air, but just as my mouth was at the tip of his cock, he grabbed the back of my head, and pushed my mouth back onto it, pushing his cock right back down, deep into my throat. “Where do you think you’re going? We’re just starting.” I tried not to gag. Stupid gag reflexes. I tried to concentrate. When you have something shoved down your throat, it’s kind of hard to remember you’re supposed to be sucking it.

I started concentrating on the sucking. It made the fact that there was something deep in my throat, not that big of a deal. I felt James buck his hips, and I glanced up. He’s really enjoying this. His eyes are closed, and I know he’s close. I don’t know what possessed me to do it, but I slowly started moving away again from his cock. I sucked on the tip just a little, and then flicked my tongue across it. He bucked his hips, and his thighs tightened. He was going to cum any second. I quickly pulled my head away from him before he had the chance to register. I looked up at him. He was frustrated. “What the hell?”

I just smiled at him. I thought it was funny. I usually did in these situations, but I knew it wouldn’t last long. “Get your mouth back on my cock.” His words were almost angry. I leaned forward and licked the tip. He tried shoving my mouth onto it, but I clenched my teeth together, so his cock was against my teeth. He kept pushing, so I gently pried my teeth apart, just enough that I knew they would scrape the tip of his cock. This did not amuse him. I don’t know why I was doing this exactly. I thought I could give up all control, but now that we were doing this, I wanted to play my way. I guess I should have remembered that I was handcuffed, but it didn’t matter at the moment.

He grabbed a hold of my pony tail and yanked my face away from his cock. “This isn’t funny. I’m in control now. You do what I say.”

“I was. I gave you a blow job. You never said how long.” I smirked. These are the types of games I play with him when we’re both in a good mood. I could see the anger building though. He really wanted to take control.

“Tiffany. Open your mouth, wide. I’m not going to warn you again.” His voice was stern, with an edge to it. It’s the kind of words that you know you need to obey. I glared at him, wanting to regain control again. He positioned his cock at the tip of my mouth, put both hands on the back of my head, and started fucking my face. It wasn’t sweet like any time before when I gave him a blow job. It was all about him. This is the kind of stuff I wanted him to do tonight, but it was hard to not fight back. My mouth was just a nice warm hole to him. His eyes were closed, his hips thrusting, and his hands forcing my head back and forth. He was gagging me with his huge cock. I couldn’t swallow. I needed more air, but I was forced to get what I could through my nose. He wasn’t about to stop til he was completely done. He was panting, but he told me that he wasn’t pulling out. (I usually made him pull out cuz I didn’t like swallowing his junk). I knew he was on the verge again, and this time I couldn’t stop him. I had no control. My head hurt from being pounded into. His thighs tightened, and I felt a big squirt of liquid down my throat. I tried to pull away, out of reflex. He just shoved his cock even farther down my throat as it continued to fill up with his cum. I was gagging, but I tried to swallow. “Swallow it all. I’m not pulling out til it’s all gone.”

I finally had it all swallowed, and like always, he was hard again. He let my head go, and I gasped for air. He smiled at me wickedly, grabbed my face again, and thrust my mouth right back onto his hard cock for a second time. There was no way I could do this. My mouth hurt so bad already. He just laughed and fucked my mouth. There was no pleasure for me. I didn’t even have time to lick him. Just tried to get all the air I could. Luckily, he decided not to finish in my mouth again. He pulled out at the last second, and squirted it all on my face. “Gross!” I squealed out.

He’d never done that before. I thought it was disgusting. He brought his dick to my face, and dick slapped me. Wow, didn’t know that could actually hurt. “This,” he said, with a quick slap of his cock, “is not disgusting.” I wanted to yell at him. I couldn’t believe he actually did that. Yes, it’s what I wanted, but it’s different when they actually do it for the first time. He let go of my face. “Lick it clean.” he told me. “You’re not serious, are you?” I asked. I wasn’t having any fun.

“Do I look serious?” he said. I hadn’t seen him that serious for a long time. I licked him clean. I wanted to gag. I really wasn’t a fan of the taste of cum. He knew that too. He was just toying with me. “Up,” he finally said. Wow, have you ever sat on your knees for a good 20 minutes? Well, your legs feel like rubber, and with my hands behind my back, it was a struggle, but I finally managed, just to have him push me right back over on my bed. I was now lying on my stomach. He unbuckled my pants and pulled them down. I wasn’t sure what he was going to do next. My arms were starting to hurt. The handcuffs never did stay on this long before.

“Why were you playing games with me there?” he asked in a playful tone. I told him I didn’t know, but it was fun. SMACK. His hand came down across my ass. “Did you really think it was funny?” His tone was playful, but I knew he was still trying to be serious in a way. I nodded. And I really did think it was funny. I love making him frustrated at times. SMACK. Another one. “Well, I think it was quite naughty of you, and do you know what happens to naughty girls?” I shook my head (even though I knew what the answer was). His hand came down on my ass once again. “I’ll give you one clue.” SMACK. SMACK. One across each cheek. “Do you know yet?” I nodded. “They get spanked,” I said. I loved getting spanked. I loved the warm feeling on my bottom that it left, and for some reason I just couldn’t understand, it made me hornier than hell.

“Stand up.” I did as he said. He grabbed two of my pillows, and put them in the middle of the bed. “Lie across them so your ass is raised nice and high. I always get nervous, even though I know this is what I want. I lied down, feeling a bit of embarrassment knowing that my hiney was on display. “Good girl,” he said. “If only you could be good all the time.” I wanted to say something, but I wasn’t sure if it would come out wrong, so I didn’t say it. But I thought it. ‘If I was good all the time, we would never have this kind of fun.’

SMACK. SMACK. SMACK. He started spanking me, alternating between the right cheek and the left. It was hard, but not too hard. Just hard enough to leave a good sting. He was only at it for a couple of minutes, but I could feel it becoming red. It was starting to hurt. He stopped spanking my bum for a moment. He gently massaged my cheeks. It felt so good. This is the point where he usually stops spanking me, and we get to the sex. I tried to turn over. He pushed me back down onto my stomach. “Whoa, that was just the warm up. I’m nowhere near finished. I gulped. This is what I wanted. Him to completely dominate me, but it was still really hard to let go of control. Especially when he started spanking me again. Another two minutes and I was starting to tear up. “Please, please no more. Let’s move on now.” He stopped. “Get up,” he said in a stern voice. ‘Thank God,’ I thought. My ass was on fire now. “Bring me my bag.” I went and fetched him the bag. “I bought something for you,” he said. I instantly thought of something pleasurefull, like a new vibrator or a dildo. That is nothing near what he pulled out.

In his hand was a wooden hairbrush, the back of it completely flat. He smacked it against his hand once, and smiled appreciatively at the noise that it made. “Umm. That’s nice,” I said, half not liking where I thought this was going, the other half getting more and more excited. Another wave of wetness flooded over me. “You need to learn that a spanking is only over when I say it’s over.” I gulped. He was dead serious. I don’t think I could have taken any more. “Now, I’m going to take the handcuffs off, but I want your hands to stay far away from your ass. I’m going to give you 15 on each cheek with this new toy of ours. Be good and this might be all you get.” ‘Psht,’ I thought. I could handle this.

SMACK. SMACK. One to the right cheek, followed by one to the left. It took me completely by surprise. The thought of me being able to handle this quickly fled my mind. That hurt like hell. SMACK. SMACK…..SMACK. He started reining them down now. “You told me that I could be in control, yet you were fighting me earlier. That’s why you’re getting punished right now. Do you understand that?” SMACK. SMACK. “Yeaaaaaah,” I cried out. He had a good point. I guess I shouldn’t have fought back like that. I mean, I did say he could be in complete control. SMACK. I couldn’t help it. It was pure reflex, but my hands shot back and I tried to stop the next one. SMACK. Right on top of my right hand. He stopped. “I will let that one slide, since this is your first real punishment. Don’t let it happen again, or there will be consequences.” I moved my hands back to where they were. SMACK. SMACK. The last few ended fast enough, but I was in tears by the time he was done. It hurt so bad. “Come here,” he said in that sweet voice of his that I love. He drew me into a deep, loving kiss. “I love you.” “I love you too,” I said.

“Thank you for being a good girl and taking your punishment. Did you learn your lesson?” he asked playfully. “Uh-huh,” I said. “Never give my boyfriend a blowjob.” His face was priceless, and I couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m joking,” I said. “I won’t say you have complete control, and then fight back.” Even though I knew this wasn’t probably true. I don’t think I could ever give up all of my control. My boyfriend was just looking at me lovingly. I knew that he loved me. That he never meant any harm. I kissed him lovingly. I felt him smirk. I knew some thought had just popped into his head. “Alright, stand up, turn around,” he said. I was a bit confused, but I did it anyway. Clink. Clink. The handcuffs got fastened around my wrists again. “Seriously?” I asked, as he pushed me back down to my knees. “Yup,” he replied. “Time to see if you meant what you said.” I smiled, knowing very well that I would do anything at this point to please him, so he would finally give me that amazing sex I have been waiting for all day long.