Lovers

We pulled up to Ellen's over-a-hundred-years-old house in her 2010 Ford Focus. My hands, no matter how long I spent running them under boiling hot water and lathered them in so much soap I couldn't smell anything else but vanilla, were still covered with finger-paint. All the primary colors plus some others in a variety of streaks and smudges stained my knuckles and crept underneath my nail beds. I squished the dirty hands between my thighs, hiding their peculiarity from sight.

Ellen turned the knob on the car's radio, cranking some hip-hop song with an obnoxious base blaring in my eardrums. I grimaced slightly, listening to some guy rap about some "shorty in the club", but slightly smiled at Ellen. I knew she wanted to prove that she was cool, so I didn't object to the annoyance.

The girl smiled back, baring her purple and turquoise braces over jaundice-colored teeth. Her bony elbows were tucked under her armpits and she held the steering wheel like she was juggling it in her pink palms. Her eyes were mustard-yellow and contrasted her pallid, acne-speckled skin. In fact, just looking at her now, I wasn't sure why I had agreed to go to her house to "chill" — that was her word for it, not mine. She looked kind of frightening and creepy, but I felt bad for her. Even though her parents were both architects and had money up to their shiny foreheads, Ellen never reached one of the top ranks at our high school. Whether it was her looks or her strange personality and tacky, trying-too-hard body language, she remained at the bottom of the social ladder. Below me even, the dyke of Deckston High.

Ellen pulled the car into the four-car garage and put it in park. Her eyes were freakishly bright as she stared at me while turning the radio down to a low buzz. "Welcome to the Devine Palace!" she cackled, trying to control her snorting.

I nervously laughed in response.

We sat in a brief silence, her eyes still gaping at me for some weird reason. "You can get out now," she pointed out then let out another snort.

"Oh," I said and forced more laughing. I pushed open the door and slammed it shut with my tainted hands.

Ellen's door flew open and her body came into view. She looked like a skeleton with hair and accessories, desperate for that preppy look, but she leaned more towards anorexic. The car beeped three times as she locked it, and the noise made me jump out of shock. If she closed the garage door, which she did, and kept that door locked, why would it be necessary to lock the vehicle? Yet, the better question is, why make the terrible sound of the alarm echo and damage my ears?

I shook my head, shaking the repulsive racket out of my brain. Why the fuck did I allow this girl to take me to her house? I wasn't sure why I did it. I wasn't high so I couldn't blame it on something I smoked. I must've felt bad for her like I did every day at school. Every day when she sat at a table by herself at lunch, threading a piece of dental floss over the wired fence of her braces. Every day when she made a loud comment that she thought was hilarious but no one laughed with her. They laughed at her. Yeah, that must've been why.

I knew what it was like to be a social outcast. After sneaking a kiss with my at-the-time girlfriend Alli during the spring dance freshman year, everyone was out to treat me like shit. Girls fled the bathroom when I walked in, guys were dying to know how many times and ways I ate out a girl's snatch, and my family wouldn't speak to me. Thankfully I was getting close to turning 18 so I wouldn't have to stay at home much longer, but the nights I did stay home, I really wished I didn't.

Anyway, despite the unfriendliness from the student body (except those horny guys), I managed to get a few lovers along the way. Alli, the spring dance fling, wasn't ready to have her reputation gnawed on, so she told everyone that I was the one that kissed her and she didn't want any part of it. (That's fucking false, by the way. She leaned in to me.)

Then there was Stepheni -- a total geek, but she was hot. We made out a lot in her small car after school. Her tongue tasted like peppermint always, I remembered. We stopped tonguing after a foreign-exchange student from Australia showed up at one of the rival schools in the area and grabbed Steph's attention instead.

Then I met Penny, my first true love. Penny was filled with Irish blood, and anyone could tell from the second he or she laid eyes on her. Her hair was a rich natural red and her skin was spotted with orange-brown freckles everywhere. She loved to drink, and that's how I met her. We dated for eight months. We lost our virginities together one night when we'd both been drinking too much. It didn't hurt that bad for me, but Penny screamed when I felt my fingers snip her hymen. The next morning, she was so pissed about losing her virginity to me, claiming she wanted to lose it to a man, and that I had assaulted her. I hated her and called her a bitch, and she slapped me across my face. It was over then and I hadn't seen or spoken to her since.

Now, with senior year coming up, I decided that I wouldn't focus so much on relationships and how people at school felt about my sexual preference. I wanted to focus on grades, work, and volunteering. That's where I met up with pale Ellen. A local school was hosting a summer school rally with elementary school children and needed as many volunteers as possible. I'm hoping you figured out I was stuck with painting. The kids were a blast, and I barely noticed how quickly time passed by. Soon enough, it'd become three o'clock and it was time for kids to leave and volunteers to clean up.

As I scrubbed at my filthy hands, I heard a boom and peered out the window. Outside, the clouds were a polluted gray, threatening to storm at any moment. Another thunderous boom sounded and I sighed. There was no way I was walking home in this weather.

I dried my hands and turned around, hoping to see a kind soul that would give me a ride home. Then I remembered I'd be going home to silent Mom and Dad and my home-from-college-for-the-summer, homophobic brother Lee. Fuck.

That's when Ellen came into play. She'd been at the rally handing out cotton candy to kids, grinning like a Cheshire cat. "Ellen," I'd said to her, "I know we don't know each other well, but I was wondering if you could do something for me."

Her eyes lit up, and I'm pretty sure her knees grew weak. I had a feeling that Ellen was lesbo for me, but I wasn't one to call people out on it. I knew how embarrassing and horrific it was to be known as a freak. However, she already did know, too, so it probably wouldn't've hurt her rep any further. "Sure!" she peeped, her cheeks flushing.

"My, uh, parents are out of town," I lied, "and I'm pretty sure they forgot about me and didn't leave the door unlocked. Plus, there's a storm coming and I don't want to camp out while there's raining pounding and thunder sounding--"

She laughed out loud.

I cleared my throat and half-smiled. "So I was wondering if you could give me a ride to your place and I could stay there overnight." I quickly added, "My parents will be back tomorrow," before she had the chance to ask me to stay with her forever.

With widened eyes, she nodded vigorously and grinned. "That'd be great!" she cried, yanking her cell phone out of her skirt pocket. "Mom, Casey Kennedy's staying over tonight!"

Back to the present, Ellen skipped around the car and over to me, slinging her arm around mine as though we'd been best friends forever, and pulled me to one of the doors leading out of the garage into the house. "Mom, we're home!" she yodeled after she shut the door behind us, her arm still linked with mine. "Want something to drink?" she asked, releasing me, dropping her Prada purse on the counter, and swinging open the refrigerator door.

I was mesmerized by the colors in the kitchen. Burgundy and forest green tiles were patterned on the walls; the floor was also tiled but with white; the counters were black and dark red marble. Abstract paintings hung on the walls, next to the russet brown cupboards, and were certainly not recognizable. Not Picasso or Braque, nor van Gogh or Kandinsky, obviously. But they looked so professional — cleanly made strokes and interesting lines, intense colors and unordinary shapes.

"Casey!" Ellen whined, holding the fridge door open with a gaunt hand.

"Sorry," I apologized, turning my attention to her. "I'll have a water, please."

She reached into the machine and pulled out an Aquafina before tossing it across the room. I caught it easily and mumbled a thanks, twisting off the cap with my yellow and pink fingers.

"Let's go watch some TV!" Ellen had already bolted in there before she even finished her sentence. For a seventeen-year-old, she was pretty immature. I shrugged; a lot of teenagers were immature.

The living room wasn't as pretty as the kitchen. The carpet was bland beige and the walls were sand-colored. A huge entertainment system stood in the corner, its audience a long coffee table with a stack of coasters on it, two leather love seats, and a couch that had reclining seats on both ends. Ellen had sat down on one of the ends of the couch, flicking through channels on the TV remote. "Mom!" she called again, keeping her eyes on the screen.

I looked at the bare walls. Why weren't there any paintings in this room? Nothing in the room was worth more than ten seconds of attention. Nevertheless, I felt out of place standing behind the furniture and Ellen, so I walked over and sat on one of the love seats, trying to get comfortable.

Ellen heaved an annoyed sigh and called for her mother again. Her fingers didn't stop punching the remote's buttons.

"Oh, Ellen," I heard someone say. It was a female's voice; I assumed it was Mrs. Devine. Though I'd heard so much about the Devines and their beautiful designs, I'd never seen them before. Ellen wasn't into much at school, like sports or clubs, so her family didn't go to many things school-related. I'd heard her mother was very opinionated and was part of the Parents and Teachers Association, but she was banned after arguing too much or something. This made me nervous. What if her mother was intolerable and obnoxious just like her daughter? Then I actually met her.

I was totally wrong.

Mrs. Devine was a gorgeous woman. Her silky, dark brown hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail. Her bangs were nearly long enough to curtain her baby blue eyes, but thank god they didn't. Those eyes reminded me of bliss — an escape. I was positive the woman was close to 50 in age, but her slender body and barely-aged face made her look not much older than 30. She wore a black t-shirt that hugged her breasts and slim middle, and a pair of fashionably-tattered jeans that showed off the curving of her ass.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from her.

"What's going on, girls?" Mrs. Devine asked, rubbing her neck with her hand.

"Just chilling, Mom," Ellen replied, itching her side. "Looking for a cool movie to watch."

"Ah." Mrs. Devine eyed up the television, wrinkled her nose, and then caught my gaze. She smiled a friendly smile. "You must be Casey."

Tingles ran down my neck and back all the way to my toes when she said my name. "Yes," I whispered, taken aback by her acknowledging me. "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Devine."

The woman chuckled, her laugh much softer and calmer than her daughter's. "It's Miss Lumber, actually. Well... soon to be Miss Lumber, once the divorce is settled." She strolled over to me and offered me her hand. "You can call me Kara." Her smile was genuinely sweet.

Forgetting the dirtiness of my hands, I shook her hand, feeling her ruby red nails tickle my wrist. She noticed the splotches of paint on my skin and giggled, arching her eyebrows. My face blushed. “Sorry, those kids were kind of crazy.” We both pulled away, and I saw her bite the side of her bottom lip, her eyes filled with something warm. "I didn't know you and Mr. Devine were splitting up," I murmured to focus on something different. "Will that mess up your business?"

Kara shrugged. "I don't care, really. Herald can take over the business if he chooses to. I have plenty of money to survive on my own, and all I need is my candles, my laptop, and my art."

My eyebrows flew upward. "Those are your paintings in the kitchen?"

Her smile broadened. "Oh yes. Did you like them?"

I nodded. "They're beautiful. I knew they weren't from a famous painter, but they're very well done."

"Thank you, honey," she said, her eyes lighting up. "I'm glad you're here to give Elle some company."

"Well we're not really doing much 'cause you're too busy yackin' away with her, Madre," Ellen complained, finally settling on some Lifetime flick.

Kara turned to me and rolled her eyes, her smile plain on her face. I smiled back at her, feeling a warmth inside my chest. Then another boom echoed outside. "Oh, lord," Kara breathed, staring out one of the windows. "It's going to be a chaotic storm tonight, girls. Please don't rush into my room begging to sleep with me, okay?" I felt her eyes flicker over at me, her smile wicked.

Something caught my breath. She was teasing me. An older woman, still married, with a child my own age, is taunting me with sex.

And I'm letting it get to me.

-----

Kara went back upstairs to her room or studio or whatever. Ellen and I finished the lame chick-flick and made a pizza, eating it while Ellen rambled on about the mishaps of her life. I tried to look intrigued, but, realistically, all that was on my mind was her mom. She was so desirable, I couldn't deny that, but it was Ellen's mom. What if she really wasn't sending any signals and I was just imagining it? Did I imagine that wicked smirk? Hell no. I knew a teasing woman, and Kara Dev-- Lumber was a tease.

The rain had started as Ellen and I did the dishes. The splattering made the room even more silent. I didn't really feel like associating with Ellen at all, and I knew she wanted me to ask her something so she could drag on about some other stupid story about her life. Instead, I kept my mouth shut and endured the awkwardness.

We watched another movie, basically on the same topics as the previous film, and then the electricity went out. I actually was a little freaked, only because I was in a strange environment. However, Ellen, who probably had lived in that house for her entire life, screeched out a plea for someone to fucking save her from-- what, the darkness? The lights flickered back on in a matter of seconds, and mascara had already coated Ellen's cheeks.

Ellen was tired from her sudden outburst and breakdown, so she decided for us that it was bedtime. Ellen threw me a worn t-shirt and shorts from her closet for my pajamas. She decided to change in front of me so I changed in front of her. I didn't take off my bra, and I'm betting Ellen was pissed I didn't. Once I was done, Ellen stripped down, revealing her pointy tits and shapeless butt. I turned away from her to let her finish and snatched some of the blankets from the end of her huge bed.

"You're sleeping on the floor?" Ellen asked, her voice muffled by the toothbrush scratching her braces.

'I'm definitely not sleeping with you,' I wanted to say because I knew that's what she was praying for. "Yeah. It's fine," I said.

"Okay," she whined, climbing into her monstrous bed and turning off the bedside lamp. "Good night, Casey!"

I winced from her shriek. "Good night," I mumbled back.

Soon she was snoring louder than the pattering sound of the rain. Between her nasal congestion issues and the swelling heat of her room, I couldn't catch a break at all to get any sleep. My body felt way too slick with sweat, my tongue was drying up, and my head was starting to ache. I shoved off the blankets and reached for the door. It clicked as I opened it, and I grimaced, waiting for Ellen to shout at me for waking her up or for trying to escape her torturous sleeping habits. Thankfully, Ellen stayed asleep.

The hallway's cold air felt amazing on my moist skin, sending shivers through my veins. I tiptoed down the staircase into the living room to feed my thirst. Turning the corner, I saw the light was on and leaking out into the living room. My breath caught; Kara was still awake. I considered turning back up the stairs, but I shrugged the consideration away. What could possibly happen?

My feet padded against the white tiles as I walked through the entrance. "Hey," I said softly, revealing an innocent smile.

Black-rimmed glasses wrapped around her breath-taking eyes. Her dark hair trembled down her shoulders. She smelled freshly clean, like she'd just finished bathing. Her smile was friendly and sweet. "Hey, yourself," she murmured, putting down a magazine that she had been browsing through prior to my entrance and slipping off the glasses. "Can't sleep?"

I stood across from her, the only barrier a marbled counter. "No," I confessed. "It's really hot in Ellen's room."

"Oh, I know," Kara said, her tone sympathetic. She moved around the counter to behind me, making me tense up, but she went straight to the stove to grab a teapot. "This should help calm your nerves and help soothe your body." I watched her pour some light brown fluid into a coffee mug, and I couldn't help admire her beautiful form. Her light gray sweater wrapped tight around her chest, especially her bosoms. I bit my lip, glancing at her hard nipples poking through the material. I noticed her smirk suddenly appear as she set the pot back on the stove. "Here you are, my dear," she said, her breath hot along my face.

The steam from the tea was nothing compared to the heat she'd just exposed along my jaw. I felt my cheeks redden and mumbled a thank you. To make the embarrassment fade faster, I took a sip of the drink, enjoying its strong sweetness. "This is delicious," I whispered, setting the cup down onto the counter.

"Thank you," she murmured back, taking a drink of her own mug.

I swallowed. "Can I ask you something?"

Her eyebrows momentarily leapt up. "Of course," she responded, interest in her blue eyes.

"Why are you and Mr. Devine getting a divorce?"

Kara sighed, circling a ruby red fingernail around the top of her drink. "We've drifted apart, I suppose," she answered, staring down into the cup's hole with deep thought. "Herald and I had been married for over 20 years. The passion just kind of died out. I think once Ellen was born we realized we had to focus on making a living for ourselves and we couldn't be carefree lovers anymore. We did well in the business, but we didn't enjoy working together. Herald's a very serious man, and he wasn't making me happy anymore." Her face lifted to meet mine. "When I started painting instead of creating blueprints for houses, Herald figured it'd just be a phase I was going through. I fell in love with my art, though, and stopped making Devine designs. We argued for days about it, and then..." She shrugged. "It was decided."

"I'm glad you stuck with it," I said sincerely. "Your artwork is amazing."

The woman grinned, flashing her white teeth. "You're too sweet, Casey." She reached across the counter to cup my cheek, rubbing her thumb along my soft skin. She felt my breath become heavier along her wrist and her eyes sparkled. "Come with me," she said, barely above a whisper. "I want to show you something."

I nodded distantly and swallowed. Kara strolled around the counter and waited for me to follow her lead. We made our way up the stairs and took a left into a bedroom. There were candles everywhere, intoxicating the room with a variety of comforting smells. Her bed was smaller than Ellen's, surprisingly, but just big enough to fit herself and another. The pillows and blankets looked warm and silky, teasing me to crawl into them. Much to my satisfaction, the room was filled with cool air that gave me goosebumps instead of beads of sweat.

"I love your room," I whispered. "It's so... welcoming and comforting."

She turned away from me, shuffling something out of her closet. "Thank you," she replied, her voice muffled in the other room. She retrieved a rectangular white board, holding it close to her chest. "Ready?" she inquired, biting down on her bottom lip.

More goosebumps grazed my skin and I nodded. She turned the canvas over to bare another painting. It was filled with all sorts of vibrant colors in the background — reds, blues, yellows, greens, violets, teals. It was almost hypnotizing just taking them all in at once. Then my eyes found the centerpieces: two bodies, both painted in shades of gray, one in front and one behind, their hands hiding each other's private places. I saw the gray hand of the person behind covering the front one's chest, the arm directly lying over the breasts. The person in the back’s opposite hand trailed down the front one's pelvis to hide her most sacred place. It took me a moment to focus on something beyond the beauty of the painting. “Two… women?” I breathed, glimpsing up at her blue irises.

She let the canvas fall down to her waist and set it aside. “Yes,” Kara said, her voice huskier than before. “Two women. ‘Lovers’ I’m going to call it.”

It was hard to find my voice buried deep inside my body somewhere, underneath all the rushing blood and pounding organs and rattling bones. “It’s beautiful.”

Something small like a giggle escaped her mouth. “Love between two women usually is.” Her voice shook my mind, frazzling my vision. Was it getting hot in there all of a sudden?

“B-but…” I stammered, my heart hammering against my ribcage. “Ellen… and your— Your husband!”

Kara leaned in closer, her breath hot along my jaw again. I shivered. “Ellen’s a heavy sleeper; she never hears me touching myself at night,” she whispered, making me knees grow weak. “And Herald lost me a long time ago. He doesn’t realize what he’s missing.” She stared straight into my eyes, taking in every emotion that raced inside my irises. “Casey,” she purred. I could feel her lips against mine, threatening to taste me.

“Yes.” My lips fell into hers, tasting her sweet voice as she moaned in delight. I wrapped my arms around her neck, holding her tightly while her tongue danced with mine. Kara reached over to turn on her stereo, playing a soft instrumental with drums and soft, acoustic guitars. A woman began to hum, her tone making my mind focus on the intensity of Kara’s lips and tongue, devouring me from the inside.

I fell back on her bed, the softness of her covers tickling my arms. Kara lifted my shirt over my head. She straddled herself between my legs, her covered-crotch stroking mine. She bent over me and kissed my neck, affectionate pecks that tickled my stomach. My breathing was already heavy; my hands were tangled in her hair, pushing her further. “K—Kara…” I whispered, my throat tightening.

She shushed me. “Relax,” her voice lulled in my ear. Her hands reached under me and unclasped my bra, tossing the material onto the floor. “Oh, Casey,” she murmured, planting a gentle kiss on the base of my neck, then traveled down to my breasts. She placed her wet lips on my right nipple, suckling lightly with her tongue and teeth.

“Mmm…” I moaned and bit my lip. My heart was going to pop out of my chest.

Her head moved to the other side, kissing as she stirred, and rested just above the curving of my opposite mound. “Your heart is racing,” she noticed, her hair tossed on one side, making her look ridiculously sexy.

Between ragged pants, I whispered, “I—can’t—help—it… ” She knew she was going to have this much of an effect on me, but she played innocent to her assault.

She giggled again before completing the same action on my other breast, teasing the pink nipple with her teeth.

I shut my eyes, letting another moan escape. My mind felt worn out — I'd felt so many emotions all at once. I felt pleasure, curiosity, excitement, worry, fright, shock and, especially, guilt. No matter how she denied it to me, she was still married. I was, like, an affair — another fling to some bicurious girl. (Well, "woman" is more appropriate I would have to admit.) And it didn't help that Ellen, her strange daughter that would've died to have taken her mother's place at this very instant, was just across the hall, most likely fantasizing and slobbering.

Her mouth unlatched itself from my breast and that brought me out of my thinking state. I opened my eyes to find Kara kneeling over me, peeling her sweater off her chest. Her body was so tan that it had to be fake, but she pulled it off. Her nipples were dark and erect, aching for touch. I felt myself get wetter as she leaned over, her round bosoms hanging over my lips. "Touch them, Casey," she purred, holding her body up with one hand while she pressed a fistful of her hair against her skull to keep it from curtaining her view.

By the look in her perfectly blue eyes, I knew I couldn't turn down her encouragement. Hiking myself up on my elbows, I touched one of her swollen nipples with my lips, pecking it delicately. Her bottom lip folded underneath her teeth as I saw her body spasm quickly from the kiss. I fully placed my mouth on the nub, lathering it with my saliva, carefully noting the way her eyes dreamily closed and opened as she took in the pleasure from my lips. She let out a soft moan, praising my work.

She pulled herself away and slid down my abdomen, leaving a trail of kisses down to my navel. "Are you still a virgin, Casey?" I heard her say, her breath on my belly.

I swallowed. "N-no," I whispered.

Kara placed a fingers around the waistband of my shorts. "How many have you slept with?"

Swallowed again. "Only one..."

"Your first love?" she murmured, poking her head up from between my legs. Her fingers grazed over my wet underwear, a light caress down my wet slit.

I shuddered. "Ye-yes," I breathed. "At the t-time."

Her fingers looped around the sides of my panties, pulling them easily down my pale legs. "Did it hurt?" she whispered. I could feel her hot breath on my pussy.

"D... Did what... hurt?" I managed to gasp out.

"Losing her."

Her tongue tickled my clit.

Arching off the bed, I cried aloud, "Oh, Kara!"

I fell back, my eyes watching my chest raise and lower like a trampoline. Kara's head came into view between my breasts. She pressed her lips down onto mine, swallowing my pants and moans. Her body heat was so intense as she lay herself on top of me, pushing her hips into mine. Our clits touched, and we both pulled away from the kiss to moan. Kara bit down on her lip again and started to grind, rotating her hips in smooth, fast motions.

Fire rushed through my veins, releasing spasms of energy and need for more. I moaned her name countless times, urging her to quicken her thrusts. She panted along my ear, then tenderly kissed my neck, holding onto the skin with her wet lips. "Oh... unh!" I cried, feeling the vibrations all over my body.

She pumped her body hard, driving me into the mattress with amazing force. I wrapped my arms around her neck, needing some form of support to keep me from bursting too soon. She dug her nails into my waist, repeatedly pounding her body into mine, hell-bent on making our bodies mesh as one.

"Kara..." I breathed, just barely managing it. Sweat was slick upon her breasts, coating my nipples. Kara pulled her mouth away from my neck and stared at me, her hips still furiously pushing. "Kiss me..." I mouthed, trembling. She let out a sexy growl as our clits hit.

"Please," I whimpered, my body so close to erupting.

I grabbed her moist hair with my hands and pulled her close to me, unable to do anything else. Kissing her passionately, I held on as long as physically possible. I felt my muscles tighten and constrict. Kara, wanting to hear me cry out as I reached my peak, pulled herself away and craned her neck upward, crying out before me. Her hot fluids trickled down onto my pussy, wetting my sensitive clit, breaking my hold.

I let out a scream, releasing every ounce of energy that I had left inside. My hands fell from her back and my body collapsed onto the silky blankets. The cool air teased my nipples, but I wasn't aware of it. Nothing anytime soon was going to relieve me from the emotions of the intense orgasm I'd just felt.

Kara fell, too, onto me. Her hair flared over my chest; her breath rounded the curve of my breast. She moaned as she rotated her head and kissed the valley between my two mounds. I heard her voice somewhere, but my mind couldn't comprehend a word. She rolled over, resting on her side, draping her left leg over my thighs. I felt her lips linger at my left shoulder, an affectionate peck marking my skin. One of her arms rested over my chest, shielding my breasts from view. The opposite hand idled at my pussy, caressing my outerlips with her fingertips. Another soft kiss and she whispered something else. I could feel her beautiful eyes watching me, a smile gracing her perfect lips.

For many moments, I waited, panting and intaking every moment. Once the euphoria died down, I leaned my head to the side and caught Kara's face resting on my shoulder, soft and steady breaths leaving her nose. The music continued to play in the background, and the candles illuminated the room in different shades and values of colors. Her hands stayed positioned in the same areas: across my breasts and over my most sacred place. I felt whole and center... like I belonged there.