Inferiority Complex
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Romance › General
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Adult
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Category:
Romance › General
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
1
Views:
1,178
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
All from my own mind! Please don't steal XD Work of fiction...
Inferiority Complex
This is a work of fiction and if there are any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, it's purely coincidental.
Could be taken as the prelude to 'Pleasure', just a little bit of angsty fluff before the hardcore stuff XXD
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A pretty little brunette was wearing the most awful scowl known to man. This effeminate being was slender, like a girl, though in fact, much to the disbelief of many, it was actually a boy. This boy was Ashes Delacroix and he hated his older brother, Kai. Kai was everything that he wasn’t. He was blonde, a sports star, tall and most definitely masculine. Furthermore, to add insult to injury, they were actually twins. As he sat there by the sidelines of their school’s running track, the foul-tempered Ashes was tearing out huge clumps of grass in sheer frustration. His honeyed eyes were trained on his azure eyed brother. He truly felt that the gene pool was unfair. There, Kai was, a giant at 6ft 2, strapping too, girls drooling over him left, right and centre, the envy of his male peers, whereas Ashes? Ashes was 5ft 8, the envy of the girls with guys drooling over him. Sometimes, suicide seemed like a less mortifying option than the hounding of another bloke. Yet, even worse was the fact that Ashes was Kai’s polar opposite to a T, being the more academic no matter how much he wanted to be an athlete like his brother, his twin. Complexes, Ashes knew, were never healthy, especially an inferiority one such as his. On the other hand, he dared anyone else to be in his exact position and not suffer it.
As the PE teacher, Mr. G, was telling the runners to get ready, they all took their positions on the 400m track. Ashes already knew the outcome. However, in spite of himself, he had to watch. His friend, Aya Rosewood, was obsessed with Kai, not a healthy addition to his problem, because secretly, Ashes liked the other brunette too. He tried to content himself with being friends with her, but it was difficult! Furthermore, to his complete ire, Kai wasn’t interested in her! Though, in some ways, it relieved him as well, though to see Aya pining so wholeheartedly, it made Ashes’ stomach writhe painfully and the more he detested his brother. Kai had everything that he wanted.
When the starting whistle blew, Ashes watched as his brother easily took the lead in languid, easy strides. His legs were long, sinewy, strong. It made Ashes pull a face of abhorrence. He never knew why Kai always got the good things. Even in good looks, Kai was handsome whereas Ashes was pretty. To the headstrong boy, it just wasn’t right!
Tucking his knees under his chest, Ashes sighed. He could hear Aya loudly cheering Kai on. Watching apathetically, trying to conceal his loathing, he saw Kai cross the finish line, a good metre ahead of the second runner, a panting redhead. When that race was done, Ashes, in his matching black PE shorts and white shirt, knew that it would be his turn, and he would never be first, not like his brother who was smirking on approach. It made the sixteen-year-old want to cuss all-the more.
“Yeah, yeah… show-off,” Ashes grumbled, dusting himself down. Kai just flashed him a brighter grin. Shaking his head, the darker haired Delacroix stalked off to the starting line. Even when he was a good distance away, he could hear Aya loudly cooing over his twin. The fouler his mood became.
Flexing his legs at the starting line, he could see Aya settle close to Kai, far closer than she ever was to him. Seeing red, he slammed his hand down on the ground, pretending to be tying his trainer’s shoelaces. Nobody commented. Everyone at Komi High already knew about Ashes’ complex. It was nothing new and had always been there, ever since the boys had first entered at the age of eleven. After five years, it was hard not to notice.
Ashes’ only comfort was that for university, they’d probably be separated. Only two more years to go, he thought derisively, straightening. It infuriated him to see Kai acting so coolly to the girl that he wanted. Why does he always get the good girls and he’s too stupid to take them up on their offer? Though… if he went out with Aya… I’d kill him… but still -! Ashes’ circular thoughts were cut to an abrupt halt by the whistle. Before he could be put in last place, he was sprinting, straight from the onset. He didn’t have his brother’s long legs. All he could do was simply make his shorter ones work harder and faster. 200m in, Ashes was leading, but fast losing stamina. When he finished, he was second, as always.
Hand on his hip, breathing hard, Ashes saw Kai advancing. Groaning inwardly, he prepared himself for whatever ‘friendly’ insult his ‘godly’ brother could throw his way.
“Alright there, Princess?” and there it was, without fail.
“Shove – off – asshole…”
“Ashes!” The younger of the Delacroix siblings winced at Aya’s rebuke. Yet, all he did was turn away. He wasn’t going to apologise, not to Kai.
“Come on.” He felt an arm snake around his shoulders, a firm hand squeezing him as Kai walked them towards the changing rooms. The more Ashes despised Kai. In spite of all the jibes and taunts, Kai was always the good brother. He always looked out for him and the worse Ashes felt.
Why are you so damn perfect!? He wailed accusingly in his mind, sighing, relaxing in his twin’s grasp involuntarily.
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During the night, Ashes couldn’t sleep. It was Saturday tomorrow and he knew that Aya would want to hang out, spend more time with Kai, as always. Ashes wondered why she even let him come. If it weren’t for Kai, Ashes knew that he might as well be invisible. Staring straight up at his darkened ceiling, usually cream in the daylight, he contemplated his perplexing situation. Kai’s nicety riled Ashes to no end. His bed was the closest to the window, against the right wall. They shared a room, their family being only moderately comfortable. Kai had the left-hand side, closest to the door. There was a bedside table in between them. Beside him, the brunette could already hear his brother’s even breathing and the more he envied him. Nothing ever fazed Kai. No matter how much Ashes was a bastard to him, he was still always… a brother. Ashes clenched his fist, feeling frustrated tears well in his eyes.
I don’t understand it… Is he so nice because he pities me or something!? That would have made it easier for Ashes to just continue hating Kai without the slightest pang to his conscience. However, he knew that that just wasn’t true. Kai was simply that way. He always had been. Even before Ashes had become aware of this complex, when they’d reached puberty at thirteen, Kai had just always been a good sibling. He was absolutely everything that Ashes couldn’t be.
“Why are you so damn perfect?” he croaked aloud, voice breaking from sheer emotional overload. “Damn it, Kai…” Closing his eyes, to his horror, Ashes suddenly heard movement. His twin was awake!? Quickly, he cleared his throat, trying to usher his tears away, humiliation quickly covered over with anger. Nevertheless, that all paled to nothingness at his brother’s words:
“You’re crying again, aren’t you, Ashes?” The younger felt his heart stop. There was a gentle pressure on the edge of his bed. He could make out his brother’s darker silhouette against the surrounding shadows. The tiny trickle of lamppost light that seeped in between the parting of their curtains highlighted Kai’s rueful expression. The compassion alit on his brother’s features forced Ashes to look away, facing the wall.
“I’m not,” he stubbornly replied, even though they both knew he was lying.
“Don’t cry.” He felt his brother’s larger, well-made hand on his cheek. He could even feel his calluses from all the sporting activities he did.
“I told you I’m not cry -!” Yet, Ashes’ voice betrayed him. It cracked, just as he’d turned to heatedly face his brother. The water broke loose from his eyes. He could no longer hold them back. “I’m -.”
“Sh.” He felt strong arms envelope him, pulling him up into a sitting position, his brother rubbing soothing circles on his back. Despite himself, Ashes rubbed his face into the junction where Kai’s neck became his shoulder. It was so ironic to the brunette that his biggest pet hate was also his most comforting sanctuary. The more Ashes hated Kai, but it could never outweigh how much he hated himself because of it.
“Why?” he sobbed. “Why are you still so kind to me?” Drawing away, he looked into his brother’s eyes, pleading for an answer, any answer he could give to his most perplexing question. “Why are you so damn perfect?” A curious expression crossed Kai’s features.
“I’m not perfect, Ashes,” he told him, returning his gaze evenly. When Ashes opened his mouth to object, he felt a finger to his lips. It silenced him effortlessly. Then, the hand moved and he felt Kai thumbing away his tears. “And the way I act towards you, that’s easily explained,” he murmured. “I love you, Ashes.” The shorter boy closed his eyes. He’d always known that reasoning. Yet, to hear Kai say it, it made it seem all the more real.
“Kai…” Suddenly, he felt Kai’s thumb against his lips, caressing it. His eyes flew open. “Kai, what are you -?”
“You didn’t understand the sort of love that I was talking about, Ashes.” Of its own accord, Ashes’ mouth became ajar.
“Y-You’re my -!”
“I know.” A harsh, sardonic laugh escaped Kai, bitter-sounding. “You disliked me because Aya wanted me, yet, here I was, trying my best to catch your attention, hoping that maybe… you’d return my feelings someday.” A melancholic look flittered across Kai’s face. “… But, even if you reject now, I won’t stop trying, Ashes. I just want you to know that,” he whispered. “I’ll be more than just your brother, you’ll see.”
“K-Kai…” To Ashes, it seemed as if his entire had fallen apart and rearranged itself completely within the sparse minute that it had taken Kai to confess all that. However, to Ashes’ own morbid fascination, he found that he didn’t mind as much as he thought he would. In fact, soon, a goofy smile actually crossed his features, and of his own accord, he kissed Kai’s thumb. Pleasant surprise became Kai’s expression. “I – that someday… it may be closer than you think. I – I wouldn’t… we can… we can… try…?”
“Thank goodness,” Kai murmured, leaning in until there was barely an inch separating their lips. “Can I?” All Ashes could do was nod. Smiling sincerely, Kai closed the distance between them, tasting him sweetly but surely. Ashes gave himself up to the wonderful sensation of closure.
When Kai pulled away, a slightly more wicked curvature donned his lips. “Tomorrow, Ashes, let’s go somewhere, just you and me.”
Without thinking, the other agreed, all thoughts of Aya or anyone else fleeing from his mind. It seemed as if only the cause of his inferiority complex would be the most satisfying cure, and who was Ashes to refuse? Wrapping his arms around Kai’s neck, he pulled him down to lie with him properly on the bed, to sleep together in every sense of the phrase, as brothers and lovers.
::::::::::::::::::::::::
Well... hope that was good!!! XD
Could be taken as the prelude to 'Pleasure', just a little bit of angsty fluff before the hardcore stuff XXD
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;
A pretty little brunette was wearing the most awful scowl known to man. This effeminate being was slender, like a girl, though in fact, much to the disbelief of many, it was actually a boy. This boy was Ashes Delacroix and he hated his older brother, Kai. Kai was everything that he wasn’t. He was blonde, a sports star, tall and most definitely masculine. Furthermore, to add insult to injury, they were actually twins. As he sat there by the sidelines of their school’s running track, the foul-tempered Ashes was tearing out huge clumps of grass in sheer frustration. His honeyed eyes were trained on his azure eyed brother. He truly felt that the gene pool was unfair. There, Kai was, a giant at 6ft 2, strapping too, girls drooling over him left, right and centre, the envy of his male peers, whereas Ashes? Ashes was 5ft 8, the envy of the girls with guys drooling over him. Sometimes, suicide seemed like a less mortifying option than the hounding of another bloke. Yet, even worse was the fact that Ashes was Kai’s polar opposite to a T, being the more academic no matter how much he wanted to be an athlete like his brother, his twin. Complexes, Ashes knew, were never healthy, especially an inferiority one such as his. On the other hand, he dared anyone else to be in his exact position and not suffer it.
As the PE teacher, Mr. G, was telling the runners to get ready, they all took their positions on the 400m track. Ashes already knew the outcome. However, in spite of himself, he had to watch. His friend, Aya Rosewood, was obsessed with Kai, not a healthy addition to his problem, because secretly, Ashes liked the other brunette too. He tried to content himself with being friends with her, but it was difficult! Furthermore, to his complete ire, Kai wasn’t interested in her! Though, in some ways, it relieved him as well, though to see Aya pining so wholeheartedly, it made Ashes’ stomach writhe painfully and the more he detested his brother. Kai had everything that he wanted.
When the starting whistle blew, Ashes watched as his brother easily took the lead in languid, easy strides. His legs were long, sinewy, strong. It made Ashes pull a face of abhorrence. He never knew why Kai always got the good things. Even in good looks, Kai was handsome whereas Ashes was pretty. To the headstrong boy, it just wasn’t right!
Tucking his knees under his chest, Ashes sighed. He could hear Aya loudly cheering Kai on. Watching apathetically, trying to conceal his loathing, he saw Kai cross the finish line, a good metre ahead of the second runner, a panting redhead. When that race was done, Ashes, in his matching black PE shorts and white shirt, knew that it would be his turn, and he would never be first, not like his brother who was smirking on approach. It made the sixteen-year-old want to cuss all-the more.
“Yeah, yeah… show-off,” Ashes grumbled, dusting himself down. Kai just flashed him a brighter grin. Shaking his head, the darker haired Delacroix stalked off to the starting line. Even when he was a good distance away, he could hear Aya loudly cooing over his twin. The fouler his mood became.
Flexing his legs at the starting line, he could see Aya settle close to Kai, far closer than she ever was to him. Seeing red, he slammed his hand down on the ground, pretending to be tying his trainer’s shoelaces. Nobody commented. Everyone at Komi High already knew about Ashes’ complex. It was nothing new and had always been there, ever since the boys had first entered at the age of eleven. After five years, it was hard not to notice.
Ashes’ only comfort was that for university, they’d probably be separated. Only two more years to go, he thought derisively, straightening. It infuriated him to see Kai acting so coolly to the girl that he wanted. Why does he always get the good girls and he’s too stupid to take them up on their offer? Though… if he went out with Aya… I’d kill him… but still -! Ashes’ circular thoughts were cut to an abrupt halt by the whistle. Before he could be put in last place, he was sprinting, straight from the onset. He didn’t have his brother’s long legs. All he could do was simply make his shorter ones work harder and faster. 200m in, Ashes was leading, but fast losing stamina. When he finished, he was second, as always.
Hand on his hip, breathing hard, Ashes saw Kai advancing. Groaning inwardly, he prepared himself for whatever ‘friendly’ insult his ‘godly’ brother could throw his way.
“Alright there, Princess?” and there it was, without fail.
“Shove – off – asshole…”
“Ashes!” The younger of the Delacroix siblings winced at Aya’s rebuke. Yet, all he did was turn away. He wasn’t going to apologise, not to Kai.
“Come on.” He felt an arm snake around his shoulders, a firm hand squeezing him as Kai walked them towards the changing rooms. The more Ashes despised Kai. In spite of all the jibes and taunts, Kai was always the good brother. He always looked out for him and the worse Ashes felt.
Why are you so damn perfect!? He wailed accusingly in his mind, sighing, relaxing in his twin’s grasp involuntarily.
:::::::::::::::::::::::::
During the night, Ashes couldn’t sleep. It was Saturday tomorrow and he knew that Aya would want to hang out, spend more time with Kai, as always. Ashes wondered why she even let him come. If it weren’t for Kai, Ashes knew that he might as well be invisible. Staring straight up at his darkened ceiling, usually cream in the daylight, he contemplated his perplexing situation. Kai’s nicety riled Ashes to no end. His bed was the closest to the window, against the right wall. They shared a room, their family being only moderately comfortable. Kai had the left-hand side, closest to the door. There was a bedside table in between them. Beside him, the brunette could already hear his brother’s even breathing and the more he envied him. Nothing ever fazed Kai. No matter how much Ashes was a bastard to him, he was still always… a brother. Ashes clenched his fist, feeling frustrated tears well in his eyes.
I don’t understand it… Is he so nice because he pities me or something!? That would have made it easier for Ashes to just continue hating Kai without the slightest pang to his conscience. However, he knew that that just wasn’t true. Kai was simply that way. He always had been. Even before Ashes had become aware of this complex, when they’d reached puberty at thirteen, Kai had just always been a good sibling. He was absolutely everything that Ashes couldn’t be.
“Why are you so damn perfect?” he croaked aloud, voice breaking from sheer emotional overload. “Damn it, Kai…” Closing his eyes, to his horror, Ashes suddenly heard movement. His twin was awake!? Quickly, he cleared his throat, trying to usher his tears away, humiliation quickly covered over with anger. Nevertheless, that all paled to nothingness at his brother’s words:
“You’re crying again, aren’t you, Ashes?” The younger felt his heart stop. There was a gentle pressure on the edge of his bed. He could make out his brother’s darker silhouette against the surrounding shadows. The tiny trickle of lamppost light that seeped in between the parting of their curtains highlighted Kai’s rueful expression. The compassion alit on his brother’s features forced Ashes to look away, facing the wall.
“I’m not,” he stubbornly replied, even though they both knew he was lying.
“Don’t cry.” He felt his brother’s larger, well-made hand on his cheek. He could even feel his calluses from all the sporting activities he did.
“I told you I’m not cry -!” Yet, Ashes’ voice betrayed him. It cracked, just as he’d turned to heatedly face his brother. The water broke loose from his eyes. He could no longer hold them back. “I’m -.”
“Sh.” He felt strong arms envelope him, pulling him up into a sitting position, his brother rubbing soothing circles on his back. Despite himself, Ashes rubbed his face into the junction where Kai’s neck became his shoulder. It was so ironic to the brunette that his biggest pet hate was also his most comforting sanctuary. The more Ashes hated Kai, but it could never outweigh how much he hated himself because of it.
“Why?” he sobbed. “Why are you still so kind to me?” Drawing away, he looked into his brother’s eyes, pleading for an answer, any answer he could give to his most perplexing question. “Why are you so damn perfect?” A curious expression crossed Kai’s features.
“I’m not perfect, Ashes,” he told him, returning his gaze evenly. When Ashes opened his mouth to object, he felt a finger to his lips. It silenced him effortlessly. Then, the hand moved and he felt Kai thumbing away his tears. “And the way I act towards you, that’s easily explained,” he murmured. “I love you, Ashes.” The shorter boy closed his eyes. He’d always known that reasoning. Yet, to hear Kai say it, it made it seem all the more real.
“Kai…” Suddenly, he felt Kai’s thumb against his lips, caressing it. His eyes flew open. “Kai, what are you -?”
“You didn’t understand the sort of love that I was talking about, Ashes.” Of its own accord, Ashes’ mouth became ajar.
“Y-You’re my -!”
“I know.” A harsh, sardonic laugh escaped Kai, bitter-sounding. “You disliked me because Aya wanted me, yet, here I was, trying my best to catch your attention, hoping that maybe… you’d return my feelings someday.” A melancholic look flittered across Kai’s face. “… But, even if you reject now, I won’t stop trying, Ashes. I just want you to know that,” he whispered. “I’ll be more than just your brother, you’ll see.”
“K-Kai…” To Ashes, it seemed as if his entire had fallen apart and rearranged itself completely within the sparse minute that it had taken Kai to confess all that. However, to Ashes’ own morbid fascination, he found that he didn’t mind as much as he thought he would. In fact, soon, a goofy smile actually crossed his features, and of his own accord, he kissed Kai’s thumb. Pleasant surprise became Kai’s expression. “I – that someday… it may be closer than you think. I – I wouldn’t… we can… we can… try…?”
“Thank goodness,” Kai murmured, leaning in until there was barely an inch separating their lips. “Can I?” All Ashes could do was nod. Smiling sincerely, Kai closed the distance between them, tasting him sweetly but surely. Ashes gave himself up to the wonderful sensation of closure.
When Kai pulled away, a slightly more wicked curvature donned his lips. “Tomorrow, Ashes, let’s go somewhere, just you and me.”
Without thinking, the other agreed, all thoughts of Aya or anyone else fleeing from his mind. It seemed as if only the cause of his inferiority complex would be the most satisfying cure, and who was Ashes to refuse? Wrapping his arms around Kai’s neck, he pulled him down to lie with him properly on the bed, to sleep together in every sense of the phrase, as brothers and lovers.
::::::::::::::::::::::::
Well... hope that was good!!! XD