Greystone Mental Hospital
folder
Original - Misc › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
9
Views:
858
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Original - Misc › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
9
Views:
858
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited
Greystone Mental Hospital
May 29, 1987
I’ll never completely understand what made me to what I did; all I know is that my friends were more then shocked. They all thought I had this perfect life. They were wrong, but what was the point of telling them. If they had been such great friends wouldn’t they have noticed anyway? I guess not since I’m writing this from a mental hospital. Big deal, perfect Brittany tried to kill herself. We all die; I just decided when I wanted to go. The doctor gave me this journal to write in, so I guess I will write down how I came to the point of killing myself.
I was never really a happy kid but I tried to be. It was all an act, though. I cried all the time, mostly over nothing. My mom said I was bi-polar because I would be happy one minute and crying the next. I never really had a lot of friends. There were a few but none of them close.
There was this guy I liked his name was Justin. He was what you would call my best friend, even though we didn’t share our secrets and things like that. I liked him in a way that a friend should not like another friend. It wasn’t my fault he was just so sweet. But the most important thing about him was that he cared about me more than anyone else ever had. Or at least I had thought he did. Of course I was wrong. I had heard some girls talking one day about how he was talking about me at some party. How could he be such an ass to me behind my back? What a coward. When I asked him about it though, he asked, “Who are you going to believe, them or me?”
I trusted him against my better judgment. Things went on though and Justin and I got closer. I loved him and he even acted like he loved me, but he never said it. Spring break had just ended and I hadn’t seen him all week so I was excited for school that Monday. He was standing with the bimbos I had heard talking about him and me. I walked up to him and he told me to never speak to him again, and then walked away with he new friends. It broke my heart. I had never this alone in my entire life.
The day went by in a haze. When school let out I walked home. It had started to rain when I was half way home. It seemed to fit my mood so I didn’t care. I reached my house and saw that no one was home. As I walked across the yard I slipped in the mud and twisted my ankle, could this day get any worse?
I got up out of the mud and went inside. I headed towards the kitchen even though I was getting mud all over my moms lovely new carpet; mom will have a fit that I messed up her floors. I wasn’t really thinking clearly at this point. I just wanted it all to end. I was so tired of being sad. I was tired of being the only person who had no one to turn to in the world. I picked up the steak knife that was lying on the counter and started pulling it down my arm. The blood was so beautiful, dark velvet red. I keep cutting and cutting. It was like I couldn’t stop. There was blood everywhere and I was starting to feel very weak. Everything was fading. The last thing I really remember was my sister coming and screaming that I was stupid.
A week later I woke up strapped to this bed. The doctor said I might be here for a while but it all depends on if I admit that I have a problem. The way I see it I don’t have a problem, just a lack of self-control and a will to end this life.
I’ll never completely understand what made me to what I did; all I know is that my friends were more then shocked. They all thought I had this perfect life. They were wrong, but what was the point of telling them. If they had been such great friends wouldn’t they have noticed anyway? I guess not since I’m writing this from a mental hospital. Big deal, perfect Brittany tried to kill herself. We all die; I just decided when I wanted to go. The doctor gave me this journal to write in, so I guess I will write down how I came to the point of killing myself.
I was never really a happy kid but I tried to be. It was all an act, though. I cried all the time, mostly over nothing. My mom said I was bi-polar because I would be happy one minute and crying the next. I never really had a lot of friends. There were a few but none of them close.
There was this guy I liked his name was Justin. He was what you would call my best friend, even though we didn’t share our secrets and things like that. I liked him in a way that a friend should not like another friend. It wasn’t my fault he was just so sweet. But the most important thing about him was that he cared about me more than anyone else ever had. Or at least I had thought he did. Of course I was wrong. I had heard some girls talking one day about how he was talking about me at some party. How could he be such an ass to me behind my back? What a coward. When I asked him about it though, he asked, “Who are you going to believe, them or me?”
I trusted him against my better judgment. Things went on though and Justin and I got closer. I loved him and he even acted like he loved me, but he never said it. Spring break had just ended and I hadn’t seen him all week so I was excited for school that Monday. He was standing with the bimbos I had heard talking about him and me. I walked up to him and he told me to never speak to him again, and then walked away with he new friends. It broke my heart. I had never this alone in my entire life.
The day went by in a haze. When school let out I walked home. It had started to rain when I was half way home. It seemed to fit my mood so I didn’t care. I reached my house and saw that no one was home. As I walked across the yard I slipped in the mud and twisted my ankle, could this day get any worse?
I got up out of the mud and went inside. I headed towards the kitchen even though I was getting mud all over my moms lovely new carpet; mom will have a fit that I messed up her floors. I wasn’t really thinking clearly at this point. I just wanted it all to end. I was so tired of being sad. I was tired of being the only person who had no one to turn to in the world. I picked up the steak knife that was lying on the counter and started pulling it down my arm. The blood was so beautiful, dark velvet red. I keep cutting and cutting. It was like I couldn’t stop. There was blood everywhere and I was starting to feel very weak. Everything was fading. The last thing I really remember was my sister coming and screaming that I was stupid.
A week later I woke up strapped to this bed. The doctor said I might be here for a while but it all depends on if I admit that I have a problem. The way I see it I don’t have a problem, just a lack of self-control and a will to end this life.