A Hurt Too Many Pg. 202 of my autobiograghy
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Category:
Poetry › Free Verse
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
614
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of poetry. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Page 202 of my Autobiography: A Hurt Too Many
202
People asked me why I decided to do this myself. Why did I not get a writer to do it for me? I said to them that they're my memories and the writer wouldn't know how I felt unless they felt it too. So why not me? I was there. I lived through it all. It was me on the stage, I, who made those many great songs. I who had a great fulfilling life though, I must admit, there were a few bad days in with the good. But I lived through them. (With most of the bad days the people I know would have chosen to die).
The doctors say that this story about my life is pointless. Why would anyone want to read about my life, no matter how "interesting"? I just laughed them off and left the room but when I got home I realized that that was a good question. My life is somewhat interesting but is it interesting for people to want to read about it. I know I certainly would.
I'm 46 with eight beautiful children, the eighth only being a few months old. Most of them have different fathers. The elder two have the bipolar that I've, unfortunately, passed down to them. The middle four are exhibiting the symptoms and I'm not too sure about the younger two (them being the only two that have the same father).
I just learned that after the youngest ones birth that I have a serious type of cancer, I think they told me it's the same kind my Uncle Jerry had when I was a teenager. But for me it was too far advanced to do anything about it. They told me that it'd spread from my liver and went into my lungs and some part of my back that limits my movements, I'm lucky enough to be writing these last few things. I have to admit I'm afraid. Not of dying though, I've dealt with death too many times to be really afraid of that, but for my children and my husband.
My husband tells me every day not to be afraid but I cannot help it. My kids are the word to me. I refuse to have them be defenseless when I'm gone. They are strong but sometimes I wonder if they're strong enough to deal with the issues that will come towards them in their futures.
Well 46 years of information, of happiness, of sadness, of death and birth. 46 wonderful years with eight amazing children to show for it. I had always thought I wouldn't make it to my 21 but now I'm 46 and I'm glad.
Although I may have done some stupid things in my life they all add up to something. For the past months I've written this I've tried to figure out what it has added up to and It's now clear to me.
Life is a part of death, just as death is a part of life No matter how you slice it they are one and the same. Remember, life cannot happen without death, just as death cannot happen without life.
A Hurt Too Many