It's not so bad...

Keshi stepped down and sighed, his head swimming with thoughts of what had happened just now. "How could I be so stupid?" he mumbled to himself. He started walking home, away from the one person's house who brought love into his heart. And now he had ruined it. "Why did I have to say that?? Why?!" He began getting angry, running now, his shoes crunching the dry, dead leaves that had fallen onto the sidewalk. The argument was flashing through his mind.

"Hano-kun...you...I saw you hanging around with Maru-chan today...Are you two doing anything?"
Hanoko glared angrily at Keshi, his eyes full of anger. This guy was seriously grinding his nerves, he was just walking her home.
"No, Keshi-san, I told you already I was walking Maruno home today! Don't get like this! We're best friends!!"
"Then why were you holding her hand?" Keshi's voice was sad, crestfallen. "Don't act dumb. I know you like her, just come out and say it!"

"KESHI I DON'T LIKE HER!!! YOU'RE PISSING ME OFF, JUST SHUT UP!!!!" Hanoko shoved Keshi, his hands reaching around his neck. "Just stop it!!!"
Keshi scratched at Hano's hands, his nails digging into his hands. 'Please....just tell me the truth....' he thought, close to tears. His leg shot out, cathing Hano straight in the groin. Hano quickly dropped his hands to his lower body, then crumpled on the floor, tears streaming from his eyes. The other small, lithe boy quickly opened the door and ran out, not closing the door fast enough to close out Hano's shout of "Don't come back!! I hate you!! I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!!" Then he stopped, standing on the porch. Keshi's mind flashed back to present time, back to him running. He reached his house and walked inside, wiping sweat from his face. His family was in the living room, doing whatever. His dad looked up. "Keshi, where have you been?"

"I was over at Hanoko's house...He had homework he needed help on..." Keshi lied.
"Oh..alright then...there's dinner on the table if your hungry..." his father flicked the newspaper back up, hiding his face.
"I'm...not that hungry...thanks though...." Keshi headed upstairs.
He went into the bathroom, and after switching on the light, looked at his reflection in the mirror. Tired, sad, platinum eyes looked back at him as they wandered over his face. His short, spiky black hair was matted with sweat, his skin was too pale and he had the look of someone who has just lost a fight. Which he had. He started to cry silent tears, turning his eyes red. He opened the cabinet up and pulled out his razor, then rolled up the sleeve of his coat. Biting his lip, he placed the blade over an old mark, then ran it up, leaving a new, fresh, bleeding line. He reached into the cabinet again, grabbing a washcloth. Old, dried blood was stuck to it, leaving the once white fabric with spots of red and maroon. Keshi placed it on his arm, sopping up the blood that flowed from his arm. "....I love you Hano....even if you hate me....I'll love you forever...." Keshi continued to cry.

~*~*~*~*~

The next day at school, Hanoko completely ignored him. He wasn't with Keshi at lunch, wasn't with him after school, wasn't with him when he was walking home. Keshi felt so lonely....just like on his first day of school...

~A few years ago...~

"Hey Jenny want to play?!"
"Sure!!"
"Ken where are you?!"
"Jeff, let's go play kickball!!"
"Ok!"
"Here I am John!!"

Keshi was all alone on his first day. At lunch, he sat by himself, under the tree. A shadow made him look up.
"Hi, I'm Hanoko, who are you?? Do you like to draw? What about reading?? I love to draw, I have a whole notebook full of stuff, but reading hurts my head. Do you like vegetables? I hate them!!"

The young black haired boy stared in surprise at the red-head who wouldn't shut up. "Umm...I'm Keshi...I like to draw, yeah, and reading is alright. I really hate vegetables too." He smiled at Hano.
Hano smiled back then stood up. "Well, ya wanna go play? We could play tag!"
"Ok..." Keshi turned around then ran toward Hano and smacked him lightly. "You're it!!!" He started to run, laughing like crazy. He and his new friend, who he would soon have feelings for more than anyone.
But all was not well in 5th grade.
That was when Maruno entered the story.
The young, pretty girl walked into the classroom, looking perfect. Her brown hair fell down her back, her violet eyes sparkled and she smiled at everyone. "Hello..." she whispered shyly.
Hano and Keshi were stunned. Keshi noticed how Hano stared at Maru, feeling jealous and protective. He stepped in his way. "Hano, we have work to do, come on." He pulled at his arm and led him to the side of the room. "We are best friends. For life. Did you forget? No girl is going to ruin that!" Keshi poked his friend's gut.
"Yeah sure..." Hanoko said, absentmindedly. He was still dazzled by Maru-chan.
"Ok..." Keshi sat down in his seat and school began.

~back to present~

But that had all failed. Hano had begun spending more time with Maru, spending little or no time with Keshi.

"What's wrong with him?" Keshi began to wonder.