Degree's of Despiration
folder
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
3
Views:
959
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
3
Views:
959
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Degree's of Despiration
"I don't think you could get any more desperate than me!" The figure screeched hardly audible over the train rumbling on the tracks above. Another person appeared oozing out of the shadows and stands up. He was remarkable or is that just at first glance? He was tall, well over six feet, which means that his face is swamped by the night.
Handle first appeared in Borrowed Valley almost six years ago and brought with him a new darkness to a miserable town.
Almost as quickly as the sounds of the train appeared on the bridge, it was gone and Eliza stopped screaming.
Eliza was sweet sixteen and suicidal. She'd been screaming here when she was stressed for many years. Because nothing could be heard over the noise of the trains. It had worked when she had only silence to return to, only everything had changed now.
She looked at the man "“ there really was something about him! She giggled as how worried her friends would be if they knew she was anywhere but home. However did she care? She was the great Eliza! Who'd had sex at 13 and who dreamed of death!
She looked again at him and for a brief second she saw Chantal praising her for her Grades, the A's and B's. But her parents hadn't been impressed they had only seen the one D she had also got. She really had loved Chantal even though it was the cause of the bullying and the countless times she had been beaten up.
Eliza shook her head to rid of the images of get Char. This was nothing to do with Char, this was about the promises that she didn't want broken. The promise that Chantal would never leave and the promise she wouldn't cut. So here she was looking for an escape from how alone she felt and an escape from the temptation of the knife now Chantal was gone.
"That clears that up!" Handle giggled, he leans forward to catch her face in the light "You're gorgeous, you know that? I'd hate for you to fuck that all up "“ but I'm a salesman so what did you want? Did you decide acid, poppers or just some weed?"
Eliza stepped back "“ she was so scared. This wasn't her but she was here so why go back on it? So she takes a deep breath and manages to squeak
"I guess Weed as I've got baccy, but I've only got a tenna!" The bridge is suddenly filled with light as the street lamps flickered. Handle stares at Eliza for what seems like forever then he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a stash
"How about we just sit here & have a smoke "“ get to know each other. Then we can sort out payment!" He sits down brushing down then patting the ground beside him. She clenches her hands then sits down.
* * *
"Hello darling, good day?" the voice brought Eliza back to reality. She tried to smile what she thought was a casual smile.
"It was ok I guess "“ look I've got LOADS of college work to do! I'm off to my room!" she raced to her room and threw herself on the bed. The instant she bounced on her bed she started o laugh at how she'd got away with it all "“ skiving college and passing her mum stoned.
She survived a week, and then it all got too much "“ college mates and then Chantal. So she went back and after that her visits became more frequent. It seemed the more she got stoned, the freer she felt until she came crashing down. But that didn't matter she just got more and more fucked! It made her laugh to hand over tenna after tenna of babysitting money. The money her mum thought it would be good to save. The money got from a well-respected job, the only remaining part of an innocent Eliza.
It wasn't just the drugs that made her return to Handle, it was how he made her feel. He understood her, well he seemed to "“ he seemed to put Eliza on the same pedestal that she had held Chantel on for so long. So she went back slowly spending all the money she had saved so carefully to run away from her family life when she reached eighteen. It didn't matter so much anymore she had that small moment of complete happiness that blocked out everything that Eliza so needed and desired.
Everything seemed all right until she ran low on money and her grades slipped. Her parents finally noticed her for more than thirty seconds and the heavens came crashing down. It started with a lecture as Eliza crawled home late as stoned as could be.
"Where the hell have you been?" Her father whispered as soon as she walked through the door. Without waiting for an answer he continued, "I have a letter here from college. When were you going to tell us that you were skipping college? Don't even think you can lie to me! I know you are upset that you relationship with Chantal has ended but your mother and I both think that it will be ok. I mean there are other men, I mean people- which ever is your preference, we are happy! This silly little crush is no reason to skip"¦"¦.."
The words disappeared and were replaced with a low mumble, as Eliza tried not to laugh or fall asleep throughout the rest of the lecture. Some of what he said made sense "“ this year was kind of important and she did care about her future. "Yes daddy dear. I'll try!" she had promised. But even that couldn't last, it even seemed ridiculous to her as she retold the story to Handle and he laughed
"Parents always seem to notice you when you're a disappointment to them, any other time and you're nothing to do with them, they just take the credit and brag about you!" Handle handed me a glass and I reach for my wallet "nah it's alright" he continued, "this one's on me, just as long as you remember I may be a business man but I am your friend!" With that he clinked his glasses with Eliza and lent over to kiss her cheek.
She touched the place where he had kissed her and smiled, she felt so loved. She lent in to his arms as he pulled her closer and there they sat drinking. To anyone else it would seem so simple but to Eliza it made her feel safe; for the first time in so long she felt cared for.
Handle first appeared in Borrowed Valley almost six years ago and brought with him a new darkness to a miserable town.
Almost as quickly as the sounds of the train appeared on the bridge, it was gone and Eliza stopped screaming.
Eliza was sweet sixteen and suicidal. She'd been screaming here when she was stressed for many years. Because nothing could be heard over the noise of the trains. It had worked when she had only silence to return to, only everything had changed now.
She looked at the man "“ there really was something about him! She giggled as how worried her friends would be if they knew she was anywhere but home. However did she care? She was the great Eliza! Who'd had sex at 13 and who dreamed of death!
She looked again at him and for a brief second she saw Chantal praising her for her Grades, the A's and B's. But her parents hadn't been impressed they had only seen the one D she had also got. She really had loved Chantal even though it was the cause of the bullying and the countless times she had been beaten up.
Eliza shook her head to rid of the images of get Char. This was nothing to do with Char, this was about the promises that she didn't want broken. The promise that Chantal would never leave and the promise she wouldn't cut. So here she was looking for an escape from how alone she felt and an escape from the temptation of the knife now Chantal was gone.
"That clears that up!" Handle giggled, he leans forward to catch her face in the light "You're gorgeous, you know that? I'd hate for you to fuck that all up "“ but I'm a salesman so what did you want? Did you decide acid, poppers or just some weed?"
Eliza stepped back "“ she was so scared. This wasn't her but she was here so why go back on it? So she takes a deep breath and manages to squeak
"I guess Weed as I've got baccy, but I've only got a tenna!" The bridge is suddenly filled with light as the street lamps flickered. Handle stares at Eliza for what seems like forever then he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a stash
"How about we just sit here & have a smoke "“ get to know each other. Then we can sort out payment!" He sits down brushing down then patting the ground beside him. She clenches her hands then sits down.
* * *
"Hello darling, good day?" the voice brought Eliza back to reality. She tried to smile what she thought was a casual smile.
"It was ok I guess "“ look I've got LOADS of college work to do! I'm off to my room!" she raced to her room and threw herself on the bed. The instant she bounced on her bed she started o laugh at how she'd got away with it all "“ skiving college and passing her mum stoned.
She survived a week, and then it all got too much "“ college mates and then Chantal. So she went back and after that her visits became more frequent. It seemed the more she got stoned, the freer she felt until she came crashing down. But that didn't matter she just got more and more fucked! It made her laugh to hand over tenna after tenna of babysitting money. The money her mum thought it would be good to save. The money got from a well-respected job, the only remaining part of an innocent Eliza.
It wasn't just the drugs that made her return to Handle, it was how he made her feel. He understood her, well he seemed to "“ he seemed to put Eliza on the same pedestal that she had held Chantel on for so long. So she went back slowly spending all the money she had saved so carefully to run away from her family life when she reached eighteen. It didn't matter so much anymore she had that small moment of complete happiness that blocked out everything that Eliza so needed and desired.
Everything seemed all right until she ran low on money and her grades slipped. Her parents finally noticed her for more than thirty seconds and the heavens came crashing down. It started with a lecture as Eliza crawled home late as stoned as could be.
"Where the hell have you been?" Her father whispered as soon as she walked through the door. Without waiting for an answer he continued, "I have a letter here from college. When were you going to tell us that you were skipping college? Don't even think you can lie to me! I know you are upset that you relationship with Chantal has ended but your mother and I both think that it will be ok. I mean there are other men, I mean people- which ever is your preference, we are happy! This silly little crush is no reason to skip"¦"¦.."
The words disappeared and were replaced with a low mumble, as Eliza tried not to laugh or fall asleep throughout the rest of the lecture. Some of what he said made sense "“ this year was kind of important and she did care about her future. "Yes daddy dear. I'll try!" she had promised. But even that couldn't last, it even seemed ridiculous to her as she retold the story to Handle and he laughed
"Parents always seem to notice you when you're a disappointment to them, any other time and you're nothing to do with them, they just take the credit and brag about you!" Handle handed me a glass and I reach for my wallet "nah it's alright" he continued, "this one's on me, just as long as you remember I may be a business man but I am your friend!" With that he clinked his glasses with Eliza and lent over to kiss her cheek.
She touched the place where he had kissed her and smiled, she felt so loved. She lent in to his arms as he pulled her closer and there they sat drinking. To anyone else it would seem so simple but to Eliza it made her feel safe; for the first time in so long she felt cared for.