Still in the Closet
folder
Original - Misc › -FemSlash - Female/Female
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
1
Views:
2,344
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Original - Misc › -FemSlash - Female/Female
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
1
Views:
2,344
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
realizing the truth
Title: Still in the Closet
Author: cass cass
Summary: Jasmine reminisces about the problems she had to go through as a bisexual. She is now faced with an even bigger problem.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: one-sided Jasmine/Kristen
Feedback: I don’t need any reviews for this story.
Characters: Some of the situations contained here have happened in real life. However, I don’t want to use any of the real people’s names, so the characters will be instead named Jasmine, Yuki, and Kristen.
Author’s notes: This is just something that I needed to write down for myself. I have been dealing with problems similar to my character Jasmine’s, and I don’t know how to deal with them. I wouldn’t feel any better by writing this without anyone seeing it, so that is why I am posting it here. The story deals with things in my life, but my life is not that interesting. What I have written is highly fabricated, though the people are the same. I’m through with my ramblings, and will continue now.
*****
1. Realizing the Truth
POV: Jasmine
Just to warn you, this is basically me ranting about my problems, and is not for those who don’t care about other people’s problems.
My name is Jasmine, and I have a few things that I need to get off my chest that I haven’t told that many people about. While I have others who help me, this is just something I needed to do. I have known that I’m bisexual for about a year now. I was confused and undecided for about three years prior to that. Now, I’m faced with what I consider an even worse dilemma, and this is how I’m telling people.
When I was first starting high school, I was positive that I was straight and was not interested in girls. I had dated several times before, but all of the guys had turned out to be complete jerks. During this, my eighth grade teacher had been going on about how we were all competing with the rest of our city to get into high schools, and how it would be so much harder to get good grades. As a result, I was extremely stressed out and was doing everything in my power to gain credit toward my application. Because of these two things, I had decided to put a halt to anything dating related in favor of schoolwork.
My problems started during the first weeks in my new school. I was going to an all girl school, and wasn’t having much contact with the opposite sex. When going about my everyday life, I had realized I was becoming more attracted to the girls in the school rather than the boys they met after they were dismissed. This scared me and I started to panic. I tried to hide it from everyone and was worried that someone would find out. My parents had made it very clear that they would not accept that lifestyle and it would have been suicide to tell them. Also, I was going to a Catholic school, so I couldn’t just up and out with it as soon as I found out. It was clear to me at the time that I couldn’t tell anyone. This changed soon.
Out of all my friends, I would have to say that I’m closest to a girl named Yuki. Yuki is short, dark-haired, and half Japanese. She doesn’t fall into the category that most people would call normal, and is often rebellious, but I like her. Our friendship isn’t something my parents approved of, though I don’t care. She’s different, and I think that was what intrigued me about her in the first place.
Yuki is an unusual person, but fun to spend time with. She’s the kind of person that would keep bird skeletons in her house or would be able to identify the weed that grew in some obscure corner of your yard. Yuki was the one that informed me that ketchup is made out of leftover rotten tomatoes, and that you can get mercury poisoning from eating tuna. She is very violent, and has a tendency to kick people. Yuki is the person in the class that always “goes the extra mile.” Our literature class was once assigned to make a poster containing information about the book “The Pearl.” While the rest of us were drawing or gluing on pictures, Yuki was making a sculpture out of driftwood, seaweed, and paper mache pearls. Many people have called her crazy, and sometimes I have to agree.
It was Yuki that I first told my secret to, but only after she had worked up the courage to tell me first. As a result, it was me that appeared to be the one in control of my emotions. She had confronted me about it during our second semester in our freshmen year. It’s one of my most vivid memories. I have tried to recount it as best I can.
She confronted me about it, if one could call it that, when we were in her room on the Saturday of a three-day weekend. Yuki had been acting strangely the entire day. She had been unusually quiet and was jumpy for apparently no reason. I was working on homework on her computer, while Yuki was sitting on her bed fiddling with her sheets. I could tell she was nervous about something, but couldn’t ask her about it. She’s not the type of person to tell something when pressured. When she finally decided to speak up, I was faintly surprised.
“Hey, Jasmine?” I heard her call out timidly. It was then I knew that something was seriously wrong. Yuki is NEVER timid. When I replied, I tried to sound normal for her benefit.
“Ye-yeah?” As you can assume, I failed.
“What do you think about homosexuality?” To say I was shocked would be an understatement, but I managed to not turn around and stare at her. How? I will never know.
“Personally, I’m perfectly fine with it,” I replied. This was starting to make me very nervous, and I was certain there was a light layer of sweat covering my pen. All this time I was wondering, ‘Does she know?’
I could tell that she was building up to a point, and was gathering her wits to ask her next question. By then, my notes were an indecipherable wreck, and my hands were shaking like they were trying to cause their own personal earthquake. She took a deep breath; while I was doing the best job of holding mine in. “What would you say if I told you I’m a lesbian?” was finally choked out in a rush.
This time I did turn around to face her. I did it so fast that I got a crick in my neck, but ignored it. Yuki was more important at the moment. When I finally got a good look at her face, I could clearly see the worry in her eyes. After a few minutes in which I didn’t answer, the worry quickly turned into fear.
After the lengthy pause, I decided to throw everything to the wind and answer her. I sighed before replying, “Then I would have to say I’m a lesbian too.”
The relief was tangible in the air and Yuki’s face broke out into a smile so genuine that I couldn’t help but smile back. I don’t think I’ve ever felt as close to her as I did right then.
We spent the next two days discussing our preferences and how we would handle the situation. We agreed right off the bat that we wouldn’t get involved in a relationship with each other. It would just complicate things and neither of us could jeopardize our friendship. We needed each other for moral support and nothing more.
We decided that it would be best to not tell anyone at that time. We both came from highly religious families that would probably disown us if they found out. It was best that we had our own living quarters and could support ourselves before we informed them. It was nice having someone that shared my “interests.” We knew we could depend and confide in each other without being judged. Yuki and I could release some of the emotional turmoil by telling the other, and though not much, this helped us greatly. It wasn’t until a few months after the confessions that my next major realization occurred.
TBC
*****
Well, I definitely feel better after writing this. I needed to let out some steam so why not write it in the form of a story? There will be at least two more chapters to this, so it won’t be long. I hope you enjoyed it, but sorry if you think you wasted your time.
Author: cass cass
Summary: Jasmine reminisces about the problems she had to go through as a bisexual. She is now faced with an even bigger problem.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: one-sided Jasmine/Kristen
Feedback: I don’t need any reviews for this story.
Characters: Some of the situations contained here have happened in real life. However, I don’t want to use any of the real people’s names, so the characters will be instead named Jasmine, Yuki, and Kristen.
Author’s notes: This is just something that I needed to write down for myself. I have been dealing with problems similar to my character Jasmine’s, and I don’t know how to deal with them. I wouldn’t feel any better by writing this without anyone seeing it, so that is why I am posting it here. The story deals with things in my life, but my life is not that interesting. What I have written is highly fabricated, though the people are the same. I’m through with my ramblings, and will continue now.
*****
1. Realizing the Truth
POV: Jasmine
Just to warn you, this is basically me ranting about my problems, and is not for those who don’t care about other people’s problems.
My name is Jasmine, and I have a few things that I need to get off my chest that I haven’t told that many people about. While I have others who help me, this is just something I needed to do. I have known that I’m bisexual for about a year now. I was confused and undecided for about three years prior to that. Now, I’m faced with what I consider an even worse dilemma, and this is how I’m telling people.
When I was first starting high school, I was positive that I was straight and was not interested in girls. I had dated several times before, but all of the guys had turned out to be complete jerks. During this, my eighth grade teacher had been going on about how we were all competing with the rest of our city to get into high schools, and how it would be so much harder to get good grades. As a result, I was extremely stressed out and was doing everything in my power to gain credit toward my application. Because of these two things, I had decided to put a halt to anything dating related in favor of schoolwork.
My problems started during the first weeks in my new school. I was going to an all girl school, and wasn’t having much contact with the opposite sex. When going about my everyday life, I had realized I was becoming more attracted to the girls in the school rather than the boys they met after they were dismissed. This scared me and I started to panic. I tried to hide it from everyone and was worried that someone would find out. My parents had made it very clear that they would not accept that lifestyle and it would have been suicide to tell them. Also, I was going to a Catholic school, so I couldn’t just up and out with it as soon as I found out. It was clear to me at the time that I couldn’t tell anyone. This changed soon.
Out of all my friends, I would have to say that I’m closest to a girl named Yuki. Yuki is short, dark-haired, and half Japanese. She doesn’t fall into the category that most people would call normal, and is often rebellious, but I like her. Our friendship isn’t something my parents approved of, though I don’t care. She’s different, and I think that was what intrigued me about her in the first place.
Yuki is an unusual person, but fun to spend time with. She’s the kind of person that would keep bird skeletons in her house or would be able to identify the weed that grew in some obscure corner of your yard. Yuki was the one that informed me that ketchup is made out of leftover rotten tomatoes, and that you can get mercury poisoning from eating tuna. She is very violent, and has a tendency to kick people. Yuki is the person in the class that always “goes the extra mile.” Our literature class was once assigned to make a poster containing information about the book “The Pearl.” While the rest of us were drawing or gluing on pictures, Yuki was making a sculpture out of driftwood, seaweed, and paper mache pearls. Many people have called her crazy, and sometimes I have to agree.
It was Yuki that I first told my secret to, but only after she had worked up the courage to tell me first. As a result, it was me that appeared to be the one in control of my emotions. She had confronted me about it during our second semester in our freshmen year. It’s one of my most vivid memories. I have tried to recount it as best I can.
She confronted me about it, if one could call it that, when we were in her room on the Saturday of a three-day weekend. Yuki had been acting strangely the entire day. She had been unusually quiet and was jumpy for apparently no reason. I was working on homework on her computer, while Yuki was sitting on her bed fiddling with her sheets. I could tell she was nervous about something, but couldn’t ask her about it. She’s not the type of person to tell something when pressured. When she finally decided to speak up, I was faintly surprised.
“Hey, Jasmine?” I heard her call out timidly. It was then I knew that something was seriously wrong. Yuki is NEVER timid. When I replied, I tried to sound normal for her benefit.
“Ye-yeah?” As you can assume, I failed.
“What do you think about homosexuality?” To say I was shocked would be an understatement, but I managed to not turn around and stare at her. How? I will never know.
“Personally, I’m perfectly fine with it,” I replied. This was starting to make me very nervous, and I was certain there was a light layer of sweat covering my pen. All this time I was wondering, ‘Does she know?’
I could tell that she was building up to a point, and was gathering her wits to ask her next question. By then, my notes were an indecipherable wreck, and my hands were shaking like they were trying to cause their own personal earthquake. She took a deep breath; while I was doing the best job of holding mine in. “What would you say if I told you I’m a lesbian?” was finally choked out in a rush.
This time I did turn around to face her. I did it so fast that I got a crick in my neck, but ignored it. Yuki was more important at the moment. When I finally got a good look at her face, I could clearly see the worry in her eyes. After a few minutes in which I didn’t answer, the worry quickly turned into fear.
After the lengthy pause, I decided to throw everything to the wind and answer her. I sighed before replying, “Then I would have to say I’m a lesbian too.”
The relief was tangible in the air and Yuki’s face broke out into a smile so genuine that I couldn’t help but smile back. I don’t think I’ve ever felt as close to her as I did right then.
We spent the next two days discussing our preferences and how we would handle the situation. We agreed right off the bat that we wouldn’t get involved in a relationship with each other. It would just complicate things and neither of us could jeopardize our friendship. We needed each other for moral support and nothing more.
We decided that it would be best to not tell anyone at that time. We both came from highly religious families that would probably disown us if they found out. It was best that we had our own living quarters and could support ourselves before we informed them. It was nice having someone that shared my “interests.” We knew we could depend and confide in each other without being judged. Yuki and I could release some of the emotional turmoil by telling the other, and though not much, this helped us greatly. It wasn’t until a few months after the confessions that my next major realization occurred.
TBC
*****
Well, I definitely feel better after writing this. I needed to let out some steam so why not write it in the form of a story? There will be at least two more chapters to this, so it won’t be long. I hope you enjoyed it, but sorry if you think you wasted your time.