Blindsided

Noah leaned casually against the door frame as he escorted Frank out of his condo. The night breeze cooled Noah’s heated skin. His only clothing was a pair of faded torn jeans he pulled on to walk Frank to the door. Frank leaned up in an attempt to place a kiss on Noah’s lips. Noah tilted his head and the kiss landed on his jaw. Noah wasn’t much for kissing unless it was part of fucking. Now that the fucking was over kissing wasn’t part of the end of the evening. It would seem after the last few weeks Frank would have figured that out. Noah stepped away from the door leaving Frank standing on the outside.

Noah studied Frank. He’d just spent the last few hours fucking him. Frank was like a string of men Noah had fucked in the past. He’d been attracted to them all for one reason and one reason only. They all favored, Barry his deceased partner. The men he was attracted to lately were all about Barry’s height, 6’0”, with Barry’s slim build. They all had the same dark coloring, black or nearly black hair and brown eyes. The latest in the line Frank, could have been countless other men who looked just like Barry that Noah had fucked during the last couple of years.

Noah had been seeing Frank for a few months. That was longer than the other substitutes had lasted. That’s what he called them, substitutes. The only reason he let Frank hang around longer than the others was because he was weary of the bar and club scene. At 35 he felt that he was too old to hang around bars and clubs every night looking to get laid. He went to the clubs and bars once or twice a month, at most. In between he picked up men at the gym.

Noah never wanted to get to know the substitutes he fucked or grow attached to them. As soon as they asked for anything other than a fuck he’d moved on. He had always been honest with them. He’d told each man that it was just fucking…that’s all he wanted, that was all he was giving. He’d told Frank the same thing time and time again. He was beginning to realize that Frank hadn’t believed his warning. Frank was expecting something that wasn’t about to happen. Maybe it was his fault. Maybe he had let it go on a little too long. Just maybe he had gotten too comfortable with Frank and now he was paying the price. He would even admit that Frank was a great fuck. That’s all Noah wanted from Frank and it was all he was willing to give.

“Get together again tomorrow night? Maybe we can go out to get somethin’ to eat or see a movie?” Frank asked hopefully.

Noah almost grimaced. What Frank was suggesting was too much like a date. Too much like what couples did together. He and Frank certainly were not a couple. Noah gave Frank an enigmatic smile. “We’ll see,” he said.

Before Frank could ask another question Noah shut the door. Noah knew that the next call he’d give Frank would be to tell him things weren’t working out. Although he dreaded the call it had to be done. Frank was trying to advance the fucking into a relationship. That wasn’t about to happen.

Noah raked his hands through his long blonde hair as he walked through the main living area his bare feet sinking down in the thick carpet. He grabbed a cigarette from his pack lying on the kitchen bar. He lit the cigarette inhaling the smoke into his lungs and slowly blowing it out. He looked at the cigarette and twirled it with his fingertips. Barry had called smoking a slow suicide. He’d promised Barry that he’d quit smoking. He had quit until he’d been blindsided. He took another drag of his cigarette letting the acrid smoke fill his lungs and slowly exhaling it out.

He walked into the small kitchen and grabbed a beer from the refrigerator. He screwed off the top, tossed it in the garbage can and took a long drink from the beer. He made a mental note to empty the overflowing garbage can and clean the kitchen counter littered with take out containers and bags tomorrow.

He moved to the living room to stare out at the Seattle skyline. He loved his view. It was one of the reasons he’d bought this condo. That and when he was thinking of moving to Seattle he’d called his cousin Elyse and she had recommended it. Her husband had designed the building. It had been one of his first designs. She had been so proud of his accomplishment.

He had to admit she was right. It was a great building with a spectacular view. The view was calming and peaceful. He looked around his condo. He’d been in Seattle for over a year and had yet to completely furnish it. The open floor plan of the condo reminded him of something Barry might have designed. It came standard with a gourmet kitchen with an island and breakfast bar, granite kitchen counters, stainless steel appliances, hanging pot racks, dramatic floor to ceiling windows, recessed lighting and a granite fireplace flanked by built in bookshelves.

Warm golden hardwood floors had also come standard with the condo. Noah had the hardwood floors in the living area and combination dining room covered with thick carpet. He remembered how shocked the real estate agent had been when he had requested that the entire condo to be carpeted. Noah had spent years in the loft he shared with Barry taking off shoes to keep from scuffing hardwood floors and having to put on bedroom slippers or socks to ward against the cold of wood floors. He wasn’t enamored with hardwood floors. Now that he was living alone he didn’t want the fuss or bother of hardwood floors.

The living room was starkly furnished. The only furniture in the room was a black leather sofa, a coffee table and large screen television. An expensive workout machine and weights were set up in what should have been the dining area. No paintings adorned the walls; no accessories were placed around the room. No rugs warmed the hardwood floors. The condo was a stark difference from the loft that he’d shared with his partner Barry. Barry had painstakingly chosen every item in the loft.

The kitchen looked over the combination living room and dining room, a hallway led to a guest bathroom that was adjacent to the guest bedroom. He had yet to furnish the guest bedroom or decorate the guest bathroom. The master bedroom and attached bathroom were at the end of the hall. The only furnishings in the master bedroom were a king sized bed, an armoire and two nightstands. A 5x7 collage frame adorned the nightstand. It contained pictures of Noah and Barry and a picture of Noah and Elyse.

His thoughts drifted to his partner Barry. He and Barry had met one night at a local bar in Atlanta and hit it off. They were both young and still in college. Within months of meeting they were living together in a small apartment. Their relationship grew and so had their ambitions for the future. Noah was the first to broach the idea of starting a business partnership. Using a small inheritance he’d received from his grandfather they had purchased a dilapidated home in a historic area of Atlanta. Barry had drawn up the plans for the renovation and Noah had taken care of the financing, making sure the renovation came in on time and selling the property. They had made an $80,000.00 profit on that first sale. It had been a modest start but in less than three years they had a thriving business. Back then Noah had thought they were living a golden life. It seemed like everything they touched prospered.

They had shared a wonderful life in Atlanta. They were the perfect foil for each other. Noah’s had been the dominant driving personality, the one always in control, making the decisions. Barry had been content to take Noah’s lead. Barry was the one that kept their personal life together. He had been the nurturer in their relationship. Together they had thrived both in their personal lives and their professional lives.

Barry had been an interior designer and their home had been his showplace. Every fixture, every stone, hardwood floor, every accessory, every piece of furniture, every window treatment had been carefully chosen to reflex Barry’s style and taste. Their loft had been featured in several Atlanta designer magazines. Although Noah would have preferred a more casual living space he’d let Barry have free reign with the decoration of their home.

Noah had to admit he had always felt as if he was walking on eggshells in their home. It sometimes seemed to him as if he was living in the pages of a designer magazine rather than a home. Barry had been anal about their home, but Barry was happy and that was all that mattered. Noah had to finally build a small office niche at the back of the loft and bar Barry from it. His little office niche had been his sanctuary in their designer home. It was decorated in the casual furnishings that Noah preferred. Barry had tried many times but Noah had refused to let him decorate his office.

They hadn’t had what many people would call a conventional relationship. Theirs had been an open relationship and it had suited them. They had both fucked around. Even when they decided to become partners they still fucked other men or at least he’d fucked other men. As far as he knew Barry hadn’t been one to fuck around a lot. They had been together for eight years when they finally decided to have a commitment ceremony. Barry had told him he wanted a monogamous relationship. Noah had agreed.

They had planned to fly to Hawaii and have a private beach ceremony. When they returned they intended to surprise their family and friends with the news of their commitment at an elaborate party. Barry had made all the arrangements for the big party to announce their union.

The day they were scheduled to leave for Hawaii Noah had run into an unexpected delay on a property closing. He had sent Barry ahead to check in their luggage while had stayed to close the deal on the property. He was supposed to meet Barry at the airport in enough time to catch their flight. Barry never made it to the airport. A speeding driver crossed the center lane and hit the cab carrying Barry. Barry, the cab driver and the driver of the car all died at the scene.

That had been three years ago. Noah had spiraled down a road of drugs, drinking, fucking and despair. He would have continued to fall down that road if his cousin Elyse hadn’t come to Atlanta to be with him. She’d and her daughter had stayed for two weeks. She would have probably stayed longer if her husband hadn’t finally demanded that she come home.

He had never forgotten how Elyse had held him at night while he’d cried. How she had listened to him each night as he’d poured out his anger and sorrow. He could still hear her tell him. “It’s okay to grieve Noah, that’s expected. It’s the only way you can heal. It’s the wallowing in despair and depression that you have to let go. Barry wouldn’t have wanted it and you aren’t honoring his memory by committing a slow suicide. Barry doesn’t need a Martyr. Man up, Noah and start living.”

It was during her visit that he had dried out and finally started dealing with the pain of losing his lover. When Elyse had left, Noah was sober and trying to put his shattered life back together. Elyse had been the reason he’d pulled through his depression. Even when she went back to Seattle she had checked on him. At first it had been every day and when she felt he was finally dealing with his pain and not drowning it in sex and drugs her calls tapered to once a week. The one thing he was certain of was he couldn’t continue his business. Shade & Reynolds Development & Designs had been their love child. With Barry gone Noah didn’t want to continue with the business. It had been relatively easy to liquidate their assets and close the business.

When he told Elyse he was thinking about moving to Seattle she had encouraged it. She told him he needed to be closer to family. Plus she could finally introduce him to her husband. She thought that they would really hit it off because they had so much in common. Noah and Cameron had spoken a few times over the telephone but that was it. Cameron was the one that had called to tell him Elyse had died. He hadn’t even known she’d been ill. The one time he’d called and she sounded weak she had told him it was just the flu. He had believed her. She had never told him about her battle with cancer. Noah felt the waves of sadness wash over him thinking about his partner and his cousin. His sigh echoed through the sparsely furnished rooms. He shook off the unpleasant thoughts. He wiped his hand across his mouth and walked through the living room towards his bedroom, the beer bottle dangling between his fingers.

Noah changed the sheets on his bed, took a shower and climbed in bed. As he was drifting off to sleep his thoughts were still on his cousin Elyse. She’d died a few months before he’d arrived in Seattle. He couldn’t remember a lot about her husband. At the funeral Noah had only spoken to him briefly. Cameron had been a broken man. Noah understood his pain only too well. Other than that he had a few mental images of Cameron and a vague impression of him. Contrary to Elyse’s belief other than loving her he doubted very seriously if he and Cameron had anything in common. Noah punched his middle a couple of times and hooked his hands behind his head and stared at the ceiling. As he drifted off to sleep he wondered if coming to Seattle was such a good idea.



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The ringing of the telephone jolted Cameron from his sleep. He rolled on his side and fumbled for the telephone on his nightstand. He struggled to a sitting position and cut on the bedside lamp. He squinted at the clock. It was a little past four in the morning. He snatched the telephone up. “Hello,” he grumbled. He listened to the hectic voice of his daughter’s Nanny. Her sister had taken ill and had been rushed to the hospital. She was packing and would be on the first flight out to Maryland.

“That’s fine Mrs. Carolyn. I understand. Do you need a lift to the airport? Okay, but if you need anything give me a call. You just take care of your sister.” He listened to Mrs. Carolyn apologize for having to leave so suddenly. “Don’t worry. I’ll find someone to watch Raine. Call me and let me know how she’s doing.” He listened to Mrs. Carolyn for a few more minutes and then finally assuring her that he could manage with Raine for a few days Mrs. Carolyn hung up.

He glanced at the clock again. He knew he wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep. Cameron rubbed his eyes and with a weary sigh rolled out of bed. He went in the bathroom, pissed and then padded down the hall to his daughter’s room. He peaked through her door to check on her. She was sleeping peaceful. Her cinnamon brown hair was tousled against the pillow, her small arms were flung out, her mouth slightly opened and she snored lightly. He smiled at her and eased the door shut.

He walked into the kitchen and grabbed a beer before heading to his office. He realized it was too early to call anyone. He sat behind his desk and flipped through his Rolodex. If it was any other day it wouldn’t matter he would be able to stay at home with Raine or take her into the office, but he couldn’t this time. He had clients flying in from Texas. He couldn’t miss the meeting. He couldn’t take Raine into the office because she was just getting over the last stages of a stomach virus. He didn’t want to expose her to any unnecessary germs. He would try Elyse’s brother, Eric tomorrow. His wife, Tina had always been able to look after Raine in an emergency. If he was lucky she could watch Raine for a few hours today.

Cameron picked up the picture of him, his wife Elyse and their daughter Raine. It was the last picture they had taken together before Elyse had gotten ill. Before cancer had ravaged her body and eventually killed her. He stared at the woman smiling in the picture. Her brown skin glowed with health, her long cinnamon curls fell wildly around her face and shoulders, and her hazel eyes sparkled with mischief. Raine looked so much like her mother. Her hair was a lighter shade than her mother’s and her hazel eyes were mixed with more blue than gold, but still no one would doubt that she was Elyse’s daughter. She was her spitting image. Raine was almost two when the picture had been taken. A few months after that picture was taken Elyse was dead.

Elyse had been so beautiful and so full of life. She had been a devoted and loving mother. Even when the cancer was taking its toll on her health and strength she had been the one to keep him going. She was the one that gave him the strength to survive when she was gone. He took a deep breath as the wave of sadness washed over him. It had been a long road. Those first six months after her death had been the hardest he’d ever lived through. For months after Elyse’s death Raine had cried for her ‘Mommy’ every night. Month by month he and Raine had made it. Raine had given him the strength and the love to go on.

His life with Elyse had been interesting to say the least. He and Elyse had grown up together. Gone to the same schools, shared friends, been each other’s first sexual experience. They were so unalike yet they had been such close friends. Elyse was a total earth child and she’d always claimed he was high maintenance. She had been right.

From middle school Elyse had joined every environmental cause she could find. Each month she seemed devoted to saving some endangered species or cleaning up a river, lake or saving a forest. She was a Vegan and tried to turn him into one. He told her there was no way he’d give up meat, sugar, milk products, white flour, salt or preservatives. He had been in the typical WASP and refused to give up his creature comforts or any of his favorite foods, which included hambergers, milkshakes and french fries. His refusal to change hadn’t deterred Elyse. She had just tried harder.

Elyse was the first person he shared everything about his life with. When he had finally admitted to her that he thought that he was Gay she was the one that supported and stood by him. She had convinced him to be open and not to hide whom he truly was from anyone. Although, he’d never come out he had never purposely hid the fact that he was Gay.

After college he’d pursued a career in architecture and Elyse had worked as an artist specializing in ceramic creations but she had devoted countless volunteer hours to environmental causes and human rights. She had even prodded him in to joining her on many of her causes. He had always found it hard to say no to Elyse. So, when Elyse had approached him about fathering her child he had been hesitant, but Elyse had a family history of ovarian cancer and was seriously thinking of having a hysterectomy. Her gynecologist had advised her that she might want to think of starting her family before she took such a drastic measure. With no man in her life that she wanted to settle down with she was desperate to have a child while she was still able.

He had agreed with one condition, that they get married. She had argued against it. She told him that single mothers raised children every day. He had informed her that he wanted to be a part of his child’s life. He had taken a stand and refused to father her child unless marriage was a part of the deal. She had agreed with two conditions. The first condition was that they would remain married for only two years. After the two-year period was up they would access their situation. If either of them wanted a divorce the other would give them an uncontested divorce and they would share custody of their child. Second, she had made him promise that he would still go out and as she put it fuck as many men as he wanted. Then she’d stressed as long as he practiced safe sex. He had promised that if the desire struck him he’d fuck other men but he’d be discreet and he’d definitely practice safe sex.

They had flown to Vegas found a simple chapel and gotten married. Thier family and friend had been surprised by their sudden marriage but everyone was supportive. Two months after their marriage Elyse was pregnant and within in a year after the marriage they had Raine. They had argued over her name. Elyse wanted to name her Willow Tree or Rain Storm. They had compromised on Rain with an e. Cameron thought it was a more acceptable and Elizabeth after Elyse’s mother. Elyse decided against getting a hysterectomy after Raine’s birth. She had wanted to wait another year or so and if it was agreeable with him have another child before the hysterectomy. He had never been able to say no to Elyse so he had agreed.

Their life together had been great and although there had been other men he had been discreet and safe. Raine had been the love of their life. They had both took such joy in raising her and watching her grow. He hadn’t been just a bring home the money father. He’d gotten up in the middle of the night when Elyse breast-fed Raine. He’d changed Raine’s diapers and walked the floor at night with her when she suffered from colic. He’d been spit on, pee’d on and worst more times than he could count and he’d loved every moment.

They had started talking about having another child when Raine had turned one. They both thought it was time. They didn’t want a big age gap between Raine and her sibling. They wanted them to grow up together. Elyse had made a routine visit to her doctor for a check up before they started trying to conceive again. It was during the exam that she’d learned about the cancer. The news had been devastating. Cameron felt as if they had been blindsided.

During the moths before her death Elyse had tried to prepare him, but he just couldn’t seem to wrap his mind around a time when she wouldn’t be with him. She was more than his wife and the mother of his child. She was his best friend. He didn’t know if he was strong enough to raise their daughter alone. He didn’t know if he even knew how to raise her alone. He closed his eyes against the painful memories.

Cameron swirled around in his leather chair, pressed the remote control and the drapes pulled back revealing a wall of windows and French doors leading to the impressive landscaped back yard with Jacuzzi and swimming pool. In the distance was the shed where Elyse had created her beautiful earthenware. The shed had stood unused for almost two years. After all this time he still hadn’t stepped inside the structure. He knew that eventually he’d have to clean the shed out. Cameron took another sip of beer and rocked back in his chair. He watched the raindrops fall against the window. He let the sight and sound of the rain soothe him. He leaned farther back in the chair staring vacantly out the window as he waited for a reasonable hour to call Eric and Tina.



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Cameron balanced Raine in his arms as he talked to Elyse’s sister in law, Tina.

“We’re in New York. Eric and I told you we were coming up last week. My parents are celebrating their 30th anniversary.”

“Yeah, right. I had forgotten you were out of town this week,” he told her.

“I’m hungry, Daddy.” Raine said plaintively.

He kissed her on her forehead. “In a minute sweetie.”

“Tina do you know anyone that can watch Raine for a few hours?” He balanced the telephone between his ear and shoulder as he rubbed Raine’s back. She was a little irritable.

“Well, I would say my girlfriend Diane but she has a newborn at home. She probably wouldn’t want to expose her to Raine’s virus,” Cameron heard Eric talking in the background. “That’s right I almost forgot. Eric just reminded me about Noah. You should give him a call. If it’s only for a few hours I think he can handle it. He’s been over to the house a couple of times. He seems to like kids.”

Cameron hadn’t even thought about Noah. He knew Noah had been in Seattle for almost a year but other than hearing Eric and Tina talk about him he hadn’t spoken with him. He let out a weary sigh and grimaced as Raine blew her nose on his clean shirt.

“Thanks, Tina I’ll give him a try. Do you know his telephone number?” He walked over to his desk and quickly jotted down the number. “Thanks, Tina.” He ended the call and punched in the number Tina had given him. Elyse had always wanted him to get to know her cousin. He was about to do just that.



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*I’m Only Happy When It Rains* vibrated through the small condo. Noah hummed along to the dark depressing lyrics. His naked body glistened with sweat, his hair was plastered to his head as he counted off his reps. Shirley Manson’s throaty voice was singing ‘rain your misery down on me’ when the telephone started to ring. He tried to ignore it but the incessant ring finally broke his concentration. He let out an aggravated sigh and let the weights fall in to the cradle. The loud noise echoed through the apartment. Noah padded to the telephone and snatched it up.

“Shade,” he practically growled into the telephone.

“I’m trying to reach Noah Shade.” The voice was deep, rich and refined.

“You got’im,” Noah said gruffly.

“This is Cameron Lyncroft,” he cleared his throat. “I was married to Elyse.”

“I know who you are,” Noah said the gruffness leaving his voice.

He could hear Cameron shift around. He heard the plaintive whine of a child and the sounds as Cameron tried to sooth her.

“I guess this isn’t the way Elyse would have wanted us to meet, but circumstances leave me no choice. Are you free today?”

“Yeah. I don’t have any plans today.” Noah propped on the end of a bar stool and grabbed a cigarette and lit it. He was instantly intrigued. What he’d told Cameron wasn’t exactly true. He had planned on going to the gym for a quick fuck but, he could take care of that later tonight.

Cameron continued. “Great. It seems I’m in need of a baby sitter for a few hours. All of my resources have dwindled and Eric and Tina suggested I give you a call.”

Noah was taken by surprise. “Ah, ah…” he stammered.

“Ah, don’t get me wrong I’d love to help you out, but man I don’t have a lot of experience with kids.”

“It will only be for a few hours. Raine isn’t feeling well and will probably spend most of that time asleep. If you have any problems I’m only a telephone call away. So, what do you say?”

Noah took a long drag from his cigarette. He definitely hadn’t expected this. He rubbed his hands across his face. This was Elyse’s kid and of everyone in his life Elyse had always been there for him. Damn. He took another quick drag of his cigarette. “Okay, I’ll do it. I need some directions.” He walked to the refrigerator and jotted the directions down on the pad he used to write his grocery list. “It’ll take me about 30 - 45 minutes to get there.”

“Thank you,” Cameron said gratefully. “You don’t know how much this means to me.”

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Cameron was walking back and forth rubbing Raine’s back, her little arms wrapped tightly around his neck when he heard the doorbell. He quickly crossed the living room to the foyer and pulled open the door. He could only stand and stare. He didn’t know what he had expected but the image standing before him certainly wasn’t it. He admitted that at Elyse’s funeral everything had been a blur of names and faces, still he should have remembered Noah. He wondered why no one mentioned he was so fucking hot. Although, he wasn’t his type, Noah was hard to forget.

Noah was tall at least 6’3” if not taller. His skin had a healthy tan. In this climate Cameron knew that the tan had to have come straight from a tanning salon. Noah’s golden blonde hair was worn long falling over his forehead and brushing the collar of his jacket. His left ear was pierced, twice. His finely chiseled face was smoothly shaven. He had a strong nose, slashing cheekbones, firm lips and a strong chin. His face was strong and memorable, but it was his eyes that were so arresting. They were an unusual shade of green framed by long thick lashes. His eyes reminded Cameron of jades.

Noah was dressed very casually. A pair of shades hung carelessly from his fingers. His faded torn jeans hugged his long muscular thighs and legs and emphasized his slim waist. The jeans also cupped what looked to be a very, very impressive package. Cameron silently chided himself for looking. He moved his eyes up to less dangerous areas. Cameron could make out a well-defined chest beneath the tight white t-shirt. A black leather jacket had been layered over the Tee. Scuffed black boots completed the ensemble. Noah looked totally, cool, macho and in control. He looked like the quintessential bad boy. Cameron remembered that he steered clear of bad boys. They weren’t his style. Although Noah’s clothes were faded, torn and his boots were scuffed Cameron was willing to bet his Jaguar that Noah’s ensemble probably carried a very high-end designer label and price tag.

He stuck out his hand. “Hi, I’m Noah Shade. Elyse and Eric’s cousin.”

Cameron grabbed the offered hand, shook it and tried to compose himself. “Sorry for staring. It’s just been a hectic morning. I’m Cameron and the octopus around my neck is Raine,” he said affectionately patting his daughter’s back. “Come in.”

Noah couldn’t help but smile at Raine. She reminded him so much of Elyse. She was wearing a pink nightgown with matching bunny slippers and was draped over Cameron’s chest, her face pressed in the crook of his neck, her arms wrapped tightly around it.

Cameron stepped away from the door to let Noah in. He closed the door and led Noah into the house. Noah couldn’t help but admire the man walking in front of him. His first thoughts were Cameron was a beautiful man and he had a great ass. He was slim about 5’10” maybe 5’11”. He was toned but didn’t carry a lot of muscle. Noah’s hair was a light brown with golden highlights. It was parted on the left and tapered on the sides and back with bangs falling over his forehead. It was the perfect hairstyle for him. Noah vaguely wondered if the highlights were natural or produced in a salon. Cameron was what Noah considered classically beautiful. His skin reminded Noah of porcelain. His eyes were a vivid blue framed by perfectly arched eyebrows and incredibly long lashes. He had high cheekbones and full luscious lips. His perfectly groomed five o’clock shadow stopped his face from being too pretty. Noah wondered if Cameron wore the 5 o\'clock shadowly to make him look older. He knew that Cameron was between 28 or 29 but he could easily pass for a much younger man.

He had been so busy musing it took him a few seconds to realize that Cameron had stopped moving. They were in a large living area. A little smile played over Noah’s lips. The house looked…lived in he decided. It wasn’t anything like his stark condo or the designer loft he shared with Barry in Atlanta. The living room was warm and inviting. It was done in warm tones of coffee brown, tan, burnt umber and cream. There was a large sectional with a chaise lounge that faced a fireplace with a built in entertainment center. The tables were done in rich mahogany and the rich hardwood floors were covered with plush rugs. It was a room meant for living not being shown off as a showpiece.

Noah walked to a display shelf and ran his fingers over the beautiful pottery on display. He immediately recognized Elyse’s work. He had many pieces himself. “You have a beautiful home.”

“Thank you. Elyse did most of the decorating.” A wistful smile played across his face. “She always said she wanted a home she could live in not a designer showplace.”

Noah laughed softly, “That sounds like something Elyse would say.”

Cameron glanced at his watch. “Damn!\"

Raine rasied her hear from his shoulder, \"Not \'posed to say Damn,\" she admonished.

Cameron gave her a sheepish grin. \"You are right honey. Daddy\'s sorry.\"

\"I hate to rush but if I don’t get going I’ll be late. Raine is just a little under the weather today. She’s had her medicine and she will probably sleep until I get back, which shouldn’t be more than a few hours.”

Cameron lifted her head from his neck. “Raine this is, Noah. Do you know him?”

She shook her head affirmatively and glanced quickly at Noah and back to her father. She laid her head back in the crook of his neck. Noah walked closely to them and stood at Cameron’s side so Raine could see him.

“Hello, Raine. I’m sorry to hear that you aren’t feeling well.” He awkwardly ran his hand soothingly over her tousled curls.

“Noah is going to watch you for a few hours while I go to work.”

“Nooo,” she whined. “I want you to stay wit’ me.”

Cameron rubbed her back. “Remember we talked about this. I have to go to work, but I’ll be back as soon as I can. I promise.”

Raine pouted for a few seconds, but relented, “’Kay, but come back quick.”

Cameron smiled indulgently, “I will. I promise.” He lifted her small body away from him and handed her to Noah. Noah awkwardly took the small bundle. He didn’t have to worry about how to hold her. She immediately draped her arms around his neck and took up the same position she’d had on her father.

Noah looked at Cameron’s shirt it was wrinkled around the shoulder and collar and there was a glob of mucus on it. Noah decided to point it out to him. “Ah, you might want to change your shirt.”

Cameron looked down. “Shit!” He exclaimed.

Raine lifted her head to admonish him again. \"Not \'posed to say that word either.\"

Noah chuckled. \"Maybe you need to go change your shirt before you say more words you\'re not supposed to say.\"

Cameron gave him a sheepish grin. \"You are probably right. Make yourself comfortable,” he told Noah as he disappeared up the steps.

Noah really wasn’t sure what to do next. He hadn’t spent a lot of time in the company of small children or children of any ages. He had spent a few nights with Tina and Eric and he vaguely remembered the kids liked to watch television. He walked over and sat on the sofa. He reached on the table picked up the remote and turned on the Television. “Raine is there anything you want to watch?”

The question peaked her interest. She lifted her head off his shoulder. “Fern Gully. I watched it last night wit’ Daddy.”

Noah took a chance that the DVD was still in the player. He pressed play. He was right. He settled back against the sofa to get more comfortable. He turned Raine around to sit on his lap. He tried to lift her to the sofa but she wasn’t having it. She clung harder.

“Wanna stay,” she whined.

“Okay,” he relented. He adjusted her small body and stretched out his long legs in front of him. He had been watching the movie for a few minutes when Cameron came back down the steps.

Noah, had to swallow and was glad Cameron couldn’t read his thoughts. He had to give it to his cousin she’d picked one sexy ass husband. Looking at Cameron he thought of how he used to dress three years ago. He too wore the power designer suits, shirts and shoes. Noah knew the suit Cameron was wearing was designer. It was a charcoal gray suit that was perfectly tailored to emphasize his lean body. The blue shirt he changed into highlighted his sky blue eyes.

Cameron’s hair was perfectly styled and every hair was in place. If Noah thought Cameron was beautiful before seeing him in his corporate gear only enforced his impression. Cameron was a man that looked good in a suit. Noah’s eyes drifted quickly over his body taking in every detail of his designer suit and imprinting an impression of the tight trim body beneath the clothes in his mind. He caught himself looking down at Cameron’s crotch. He knew he was moving in dangerous territory imagining his cousin’s husband naked, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He mentally chided himself. He wasn’t here to cruise Cameron. Besides, Cameron was totally high maintenance. Noah had to remind himself that he shied away from high maintenance men. Noah mentally doused his raging hormones with ice water.

“You two going to be okay?” Cameron asked as he grabbed his keys and briefcase from the table. He was again torn between just canceling the meeting and letting the deal go down the drain and staying home with his daughter. He had to admit that he honestly didn’t know a lot about Noah. Then he remembered that Elyse had thought highly of Noah. She’d thought enough of him to drop everything and go to Atlanta to stay with him when his lover had passed away. He had to rely on Elyse, Eric’s and Tina’s judgment.

“We’ll be fine,” Noah assured although he admitted to himself he was still a little nervous about being left alone with Raine.

Cameron seemed to read his thoughts, “The movie usually puts her to sleep. She\'s had breakfast. There’s juice, frozen Pedialyte pops and vegetable soup you can warm up for her if she gets hungry. There’s also a bowl of sliced fruit in the refrigerator. And of course, you can help yourself to anything in the frig. If you can’t find anything you like in the frig there are some take out menus in the top drawer next to frig.”

“Thanks,” Noah said.

Cameron bent down eye level to talk to Raine. “I’ll be back really, really soon. Okay?”

“’Kay,” she said.

Cameron lovingly ran his hands over her long curls. He leaned in and kissed her. “If you need to talk to me just call. Remember you can reach me by pressing #1 on the telephone.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a sloppy kiss. “Love You, Daddy.”

“I love you too, sweetie.” Cameron returned her kiss before he stood. “My cellular is speed dial #1 and the office is #2. If anything happens just give me a call.”

“Got it,” Noah told him. He watched as Cameron walked away. Damn, he the guy even had a sexy walk. The back view looked just as good as the front. He heard the garage door open and shut in the distance. He looked down and the beautiful little girl. Her eyes were already closing and her body was lax against his. Her skin was a much lighter shade than her mothers, and her hair was a mixture of her mother’s cinnamon curls and her father’s light brown hair. Her eyes were a beautiful hazel mixed with more blue than gold. She was going to be a little heart breaker. He leaned back and watched the movie about a the rain forest.

As Cameron pulled out of the garage he saw the classic restored black Mustang GT parked in front of his house. It was a total muscle car. It suited Noah perfectly. His thoughts were on the man he’d just left in his home with his daughter. He was a little apprehensive, but he’d called Tina again and she had assured him Noah was perfectly safe.

He hadn’t been prepared for his physical response to Noah. Then again he was a Gay man and Cameron was a very, very attractive, virile specimen. It wasn’t like he’d been celibate since Elyse’s death. He’d picked up a few guys in the past year. It was nothing serious. He knew he should move on but he’d hadn’t met a man that he’d even remotely felt anything for other than the need for a physical release. Even if he was ready for a relationship he knew that he’d never find it with his wife’s cousin. Noah was definitely off limits to him. He returned his mind to traffic as he navigated a few crowded areas. He couldn’t afford to complicate his life.