When Bon Bons ATTACK!
folder
Original - Misc › Humour
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
874
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Original - Misc › Humour
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
874
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
When Bon Bons ATTACK!
\"When Bon Bons ATTACK!\"
by SiriuslySevered
It was a dark and stormy night, and my sister and I were stuffed. After two half-gallon cartons of Breyer\'s coffee ice cream, three bags of popcorn, a tub of Red Vines, and half a box of Bon Bons, we\'d developed a reasonable sugar high, in addition to crazed hallucinations. Apparently, high amounts of sugar do not mix well with Alfred Hitchcock marathons.
As we sat on the couch, laughing at the shower scene of Psycho, there came a noise from the kitchen, just barely audible over the high-pitched shrieks of the suspenseful violins of the movie.
\"What was that?\" Katy whispered timidly.
\"I don\'t know. I\'ll go see...\"
As in all scary movies, everyone has to split up, and SOMEONE has to go see what the noise is. At least my sister and i had our virginities intact, so we would (hopefully) be spared.
I crept soundlessly into the kitchen, prepared to give any intruder a swift kick to the groin or a judo chop to the windpipe.
“Who’s there?” I ventured, getting a frying pan at-the-ready.
Out of nowhere, I heard a tiny war cry, then:
“You ate Freddy! For this, you must PAY!” I started to get the idea that maybe only eating half of the Bon Bons in the box wasn’t a good idea. Clearly, I’d eaten Freddy and left survivors to plot their sweet revenge.
As quickly as I turned around, it was not quick enough, for I felt a tiny little ice-cream chocolate covered body land and latch onto my head. The tiny hands and feet dug into my scalp, seeking retribution for a lost loved one.
“I’m sorry about Freddy, but I was hungry!” I exclaimed as I tried to pry the tiny mass from my head.
“Sorry isn’t good enough! You took the life of our kin, and to repay that debt, you must die. Justice shall be served!”
“Hold on a minute… Did you say *our* kin?” Suddenly, I was more than just nervous; I feared for my pathetic excuse for a life!
The little Bon Bon swung on my hair to just in front of my face so I could see its evil little smirk.
“He he he… Troops, move in!”
At this point, I knew that I was doomed, but Katy didn’t have to be. Frantically, before the oncoming wave of Bon Bons hit, I dashed towards the family room to give Katy the red alert before I would be forced to succumb to the armies of tasty morsels.
“Katy, quick! Run while you still can!” I cried, eager for her safety.
But as I entered the room, I saw her body sprawled over the couched, and noted grimly how Kamikaze Bon Bons had jumped into her mouth and smothered her. I felt the tears well up in my eyes as I took in the sight. My beloved baby sister, murdered… by rebel movie treats. She hadn’t even eaten any herself! She was merely an innocent bystander killed by the forces of psychotic evil.
With Katy gone, there was nothing left for me. As I stood frozen in front of my sister’s lifeless form, I felt the tiny bodies of the Bon Bon troops cling onto every inch of my body, scaling me amidst my defeat to excavate my cavernous mouth; just like Katy. I made no move to stop the once-tasty snacks, and let the wave of darkness shield my eyes, allowing myself to drift away…
* * * * *
Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Beep-beep!
“What the…”
My eyelids were heavy as I opened my eyes, the sunlight glaring into my confused pupils. Suddenly, the memories of Bon Bons attacking washed over me.
It was just a dream! Bon Bons didn’t really attack Katy and me! I must have fallen asleep and had the disturbing sugar-induced nightmares sometime during the movie.
I stretched my arms above my head, relishing the tender ache of my waking muscles.
Then, I saw it, and felt it clutched in my fingers as if for the first time. It was a box of Bon Bons…
I looked over at Katy, feeling a sharp tug within my gut. I didn’t want to, but I had to see. I crept over to her side and lightly pulled at her left shoulder, and was horrified to see what I had feared the most: her eyes were wide from sheer terror, her mouth stuffed full of melting, lifeless Bon Bons, seemingly reverted to their natural state after they completed their mission. A trickle of melted ice cream had run down her chin, her lips smothered with chocolate. Chocolate, like blood. I can still see the image of her swollen cheeks and the scratch marks where she’d tried to wrench the determined little soldiers from herself in a last-ditch attempt at survival.
Although the Bon Bons spared me, I don’t know whether I would be given mercy in the future.
To this day, I have never eaten another Bon Bon, fearful of eating another Freddy, or maybe even a Waldo, only to feel the full power of their ruthless bittersweet vengeance.
Author\'s Note: Reviews appreciated, as always.
And yes, you\'re allowed to laugh. It\'s meant to be funny. And terrifying... :)
by SiriuslySevered
It was a dark and stormy night, and my sister and I were stuffed. After two half-gallon cartons of Breyer\'s coffee ice cream, three bags of popcorn, a tub of Red Vines, and half a box of Bon Bons, we\'d developed a reasonable sugar high, in addition to crazed hallucinations. Apparently, high amounts of sugar do not mix well with Alfred Hitchcock marathons.
As we sat on the couch, laughing at the shower scene of Psycho, there came a noise from the kitchen, just barely audible over the high-pitched shrieks of the suspenseful violins of the movie.
\"What was that?\" Katy whispered timidly.
\"I don\'t know. I\'ll go see...\"
As in all scary movies, everyone has to split up, and SOMEONE has to go see what the noise is. At least my sister and i had our virginities intact, so we would (hopefully) be spared.
I crept soundlessly into the kitchen, prepared to give any intruder a swift kick to the groin or a judo chop to the windpipe.
“Who’s there?” I ventured, getting a frying pan at-the-ready.
Out of nowhere, I heard a tiny war cry, then:
“You ate Freddy! For this, you must PAY!” I started to get the idea that maybe only eating half of the Bon Bons in the box wasn’t a good idea. Clearly, I’d eaten Freddy and left survivors to plot their sweet revenge.
As quickly as I turned around, it was not quick enough, for I felt a tiny little ice-cream chocolate covered body land and latch onto my head. The tiny hands and feet dug into my scalp, seeking retribution for a lost loved one.
“I’m sorry about Freddy, but I was hungry!” I exclaimed as I tried to pry the tiny mass from my head.
“Sorry isn’t good enough! You took the life of our kin, and to repay that debt, you must die. Justice shall be served!”
“Hold on a minute… Did you say *our* kin?” Suddenly, I was more than just nervous; I feared for my pathetic excuse for a life!
The little Bon Bon swung on my hair to just in front of my face so I could see its evil little smirk.
“He he he… Troops, move in!”
At this point, I knew that I was doomed, but Katy didn’t have to be. Frantically, before the oncoming wave of Bon Bons hit, I dashed towards the family room to give Katy the red alert before I would be forced to succumb to the armies of tasty morsels.
“Katy, quick! Run while you still can!” I cried, eager for her safety.
But as I entered the room, I saw her body sprawled over the couched, and noted grimly how Kamikaze Bon Bons had jumped into her mouth and smothered her. I felt the tears well up in my eyes as I took in the sight. My beloved baby sister, murdered… by rebel movie treats. She hadn’t even eaten any herself! She was merely an innocent bystander killed by the forces of psychotic evil.
With Katy gone, there was nothing left for me. As I stood frozen in front of my sister’s lifeless form, I felt the tiny bodies of the Bon Bon troops cling onto every inch of my body, scaling me amidst my defeat to excavate my cavernous mouth; just like Katy. I made no move to stop the once-tasty snacks, and let the wave of darkness shield my eyes, allowing myself to drift away…
* * * * *
Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Beep-beep!
“What the…”
My eyelids were heavy as I opened my eyes, the sunlight glaring into my confused pupils. Suddenly, the memories of Bon Bons attacking washed over me.
It was just a dream! Bon Bons didn’t really attack Katy and me! I must have fallen asleep and had the disturbing sugar-induced nightmares sometime during the movie.
I stretched my arms above my head, relishing the tender ache of my waking muscles.
Then, I saw it, and felt it clutched in my fingers as if for the first time. It was a box of Bon Bons…
I looked over at Katy, feeling a sharp tug within my gut. I didn’t want to, but I had to see. I crept over to her side and lightly pulled at her left shoulder, and was horrified to see what I had feared the most: her eyes were wide from sheer terror, her mouth stuffed full of melting, lifeless Bon Bons, seemingly reverted to their natural state after they completed their mission. A trickle of melted ice cream had run down her chin, her lips smothered with chocolate. Chocolate, like blood. I can still see the image of her swollen cheeks and the scratch marks where she’d tried to wrench the determined little soldiers from herself in a last-ditch attempt at survival.
Although the Bon Bons spared me, I don’t know whether I would be given mercy in the future.
To this day, I have never eaten another Bon Bon, fearful of eating another Freddy, or maybe even a Waldo, only to feel the full power of their ruthless bittersweet vengeance.
Author\'s Note: Reviews appreciated, as always.
And yes, you\'re allowed to laugh. It\'s meant to be funny. And terrifying... :)