Andrew Payne

Disclaimer: Andrew Payne is my own piece of fiction, so no copying for you plagiarizers!
Author\'s note: If you read the story and like the characters or wish to create your own sequel, be my guest, just remember to give me my credit where the credit is due.

Thanks, Scribbles05

PS.
Please review. I\'m dying to know what you readers think of the story. If you like it, I\'ll start sending in chapters of Andrew Payne II. Andrew Payne I was written many months ago, so this sequel is a bit more NC-17. My writing has also developed more since then and I have a much larger sequel than this one. That story tells of the married life of Richard and Andrew. But you can\'t get it until I find out what you think about this one.

P.S.S.
Also, if you have any suggestions or criticisims (constructive only) feel free to tell me. I\'m a sucker for other\'s input.

Andrew Payne

characters:

Andrew Payne
Richard Taylor
Bianca Fuller
Wesley St. John
Gina Daniels
Harry Benson
Professor Peter Cambridge

LOVE. That four letter word that is the best kind of acceptance people search for. What is love? If you were to have asked me two years ago that same question, I couldn\'t have given you an answer. Mainly because I was looking for it myself.

My name is Andrew Payne. I was 21 years old and a junior at my college. This is my story.

I was not what you would call a traditional college guy. I\'m not even a traditional guy period. Big curly hair, slim figure, and a nack for clothes was pretty much me. But what really made me stand out was my preferance of both men and women. Unlike some people who just found out out of the blue they were bi or gay, I\'d known this all my life. Changing in gym locker rooms has brought me more pleasure than you could ever know. Anyway, all jokes aside, everyone at my college knew what I was except my parents. I could\'nt understand why. There had been plenty of signs. Like that time my mother found a Playgirl Magazine on my bed when I was 16. I told her it was one of my girl friend\'s magazines and she believed it. I was in the basement kissing our neighbor\'s son and she apparently put it off as nothing and thought it not strange that we broke away from each other when she came down the steps.

Anyway. Lets fast forward. I was in the local college hangout, The Cafe\' Cooler, with my friends, Richard Taylor, he\'s more my best friend and also a guy lover, Bianca Fuller, Wesley St. John, and Gina Daniels. We would always kick back and talk about whatever is on our minds while drinking a few moca lattes. \"Mid terms are a bitch.\" Bianca said as she stirred the straw in her cup. \"There is so much to learn I don\'t think I\'ll be able to remember it all.\"

\"Well, did you study during the semester?\" Wesley asked her.

\"Not really.\"

\"Then, you\'re not going to remember it all.\" Bianca never studies for anything. We were all amazed she hadn\'t been kicked out of school yet. \"Ah....Drew?\" Wesley called to me, but I wasn\'t paying any attention to him.......or any of them for that matter. There was this fine slender blonde cupcake sitting at the next table eating a banana split. He caught eye contact with me and winked. ~So he swings that way, huh?~ I thought. I made sure he was watching as I started eyeing his physique and smiling in approval. He looked down at his bowl and picked up his cherry by the stem and dangled it just above his mouth. He looked at me as he licked it with the tip of his tongue then put it in his mouth, sucked on it, then pulled it out. I let out a small moan before I knew it. I felt myself get hard just looking at him. \"Drew?!\" Wesley said again.

\"What?!\"

\"What are you looking at?\"

\"Nothing.\"

\"I know.\" Gina said grinning at me. She\'s always the nosey one. \"He was having eye sex with that guy at the next table. I heard you moaning over there.\"

\"Wait a minute.\" Richard said. \"What about your boyfriend, Peter? Or should I say Professor Peter Cambridge. You\'re not cheating are you?\"

\"Shut up, Richard.\"

\"Dick!\" He prefers to be called Dick because he thinks his biggest asset is his penis. I haven\'t seen it, so I don\'t call him that.

\"Whatever. Anyway, Peter is cheating on me.\"

\"With his wife?\"

\"Yes! He told me he was going to leave her and be with me.\"

\"He\'s been singing that same song for months now. He\'s not leaving his wife, Drew. Especially to become a guy\'s lover. He is too far in the closet to ever come out. Do you know what all is at stake for him?\"

\"And? He should\'ve thought of that before he wanted to start fucking me.\" I sat back in my chair and crossed my legs. It\'s true. I was seeing my history professor. It started one day when we got our tests back from the previous day. I absolutely bombed the damn thing. There were so many red marks on my paper, I thought it was bleeding. Then, at the top it read: See me after class. So, I did. I had always had a crush on the young teacher ever since I first walked in his classroom. So everyday I would make sure I dressed my best for him. And that day was no exception. I wore a hot pink polo shirt, tight jeans, and a pair of pink Converse. And I put on my best colone. \"Andrew, what happened on the test?\" He asked me as he sat in the desk next to me.

\"I don\'t know. I just went blank when I got the paper. Maybe I should just quit the class......\" I wasn\'t going to quit. Even if they paid me to. I only said it as a part of my test. See what type of man I\'m chasing after, you know.

He quickly looked up at me. \"No. Don\'t do that.....\" Uh huh. He likes me. \"so soon, anyway. We\'ve only been in class for a week. You haven\'t given it a shot yet.\" Well, I know how he feels now.......time to play. I moved my chair to his desk and leaned in towards him. I made sure he got to smell my colone I spent $40 for.

\"Well, perhaps if you gave me a quick.......tutoring, maybe I\'ll stay.\" I licked my lips. He stared at me for a while; contemplating what he should say or do. He wanted me. It was written all over his face. He blinked and turned to my test paper.

\"Sure, Andrew. What do you want to know?\"

I kept staring in his gorgeous green eyes. \"Everything.\" I said softly. If I didn\'t seal the deal with the professor today, my erection was going to explode. He laughed a bit, then looked down at my lips and started moving towards me. As eager as I was, I started moving too. We embraced in a single kiss that couldn\'t have lasted more than 3 seconds, then he backed away.

\"I can\'t believe I did that.\" He said just above a whisper. \"Does that mean I\'m.......I\'m.......\"

\"Did you like it?\" I asked.

\"I think I liked it too much.\" I smiled at my accomplishment and kissed him again. This time I leaned in more to him and wrapped my arms around his neck. He broke away again, but this time he unzipped my jeans. \"I noticed you had alittle tension growing down there, so maybe I can help you.\" He stuck his hand down my crotch and started stroking me. To be an unexperienced bi, he sure knew the places to go and what to do.

And that started our whole relationship. We didn\'t go as far as fucking, because of fear that somebody would see. Atleast he was scared. We just stroked each other until we both climaxed. But it still was an amazing experience.

\"Andrew,\" Gina said. \"You\'re wasting your time. You know how you are. Regardless of the tough persona you put on for everybody, you want to fall in love. And you are going to fall in love with Peter and you\'re going to get your feelings hurt.\"

I rolled my eyes. All that bullshit went in one ear and out the other. \"Gina, don\'t you have band practice or something?\"

She looked at her watch and got up. \"You\'re right. But just remember what I said, Ok?\"

\"Whatever, Gina. See you later.\"

After our time together at the cafe\' was over, me and Binaca went shopping. I recieve a pretty good amount of money from my parents every two weeks and I always blow it on clothes and shoes. Clothes are what I am. I like them high quality, name brand, and fitted. I have a rather beautiful body if I must say so myself (though a lot of my lovers agree with me) and I want my clothes to be able to show it off. By the end of our shopping spree, I had bought four pairs of slacks, two pair of jeans, six shirts, three sweaters, and two pairs of shoes. Then of course like any shopper, you must try them all on. So, me and Bianca went to my loft that I share with Richard and modeled our clothes.

I walked down stairs to where she was and stood infront of her wearing a black cashmere turtle neck, black slacks, belt, and black shoes. \"Well?\"

\"That looks great, Drew. You wearing that to the Barn Yard Bash tonight?\"

\"Yeah.\" The Barn Yard Bash is a foolish college term meaning backyard party. Students throw one every semester on the college football field. Now, it\'s illegal to be out there on the field, but we don\'t care. Just when the campus police get out there, you want to make sure you\'re long gone.

Me, Bianca, and Richard went to the party. Gina was having to stay behind and clean drums and Wesley just couldn\'t come. He\'s a pitiful liar. We all know he\'s joining a fraternity. When we got there, we split up and I went to the keg and cooler section and grabbed a cup of beer. Richard went off and started dancing with some group of girls and Bianca found some of her buddies. I leaned against the keg and scoped the area. Plenty of gorgeous women, fine men, and then there were your sore thumbs.

I immediately zeroed in on a guy who was standing next to some girl I didn\'t recognize. I remembered him perfectly. I got him drunk one Friday night and banged him at my place. He was quite good. Yeah, I remember him. I used to graze my hand over his short blonde hair. I also remember him talking a hole in my ear when we finished, saying that he never did this before and he wasn\'t gay and don\'t tell anybody.

I was bored and felt like making mischief, so I walked over to him. He never saw me coming when I approached him from behind and kissed his ear. He jumped and I started laughing. \"Drew, what the hell.......\"

\"What\'s wrong, Dennis? You don\'t miss me?\"

\"What are you doing?!\"

\"Who is this?\" I looked at the dumbfounded girl next to him. Poor thing. Doesn\'t know what she has. \"You\'ve gone and crossed over on me, huh?\" I stuck out my hand to the girl. As she was about to take it, Dennis grabbed her arm.

\"No. Don\'t talk to him, baby.\"

\"Baby?\" I said looking surprised. \"I thought I was your baby. Atleast that\'s what you\'d call me when I would........\"

\"Fuck you, Andrew.\" Dennis said to me as he took his gal pal by the hand and left.

\"Ok.\" I said smiling. Man, I was bored. I had gotten all dressed up for nothing. No guys to hit on. Only dumb looking ones who like to pour beer on themselves, yell, and burp all the time. Then, I found him. Tall, dark, and handsome (Sound familiar). Short brown hair, slight built, dressed well. But would he want me? Was he straight? I didn\'t care. If he wasn\'t, I\'d just trick him.

He was standing by the barn fire with a group of other guys drinking a beer. I waited for the right moment to go to him. I took that chance when I saw him head for the beer table. \"Hi?\" I said to him over the loud music.

\"Hey.\" He said to me as he filled his cup.

It was silent for a while and I just decided to go for it. ~Fuck it.~ I thought. \"You got anything on you?\"

\"Yeah. I got some beer and some blunts back at my apartment.\" BINGO!!!

\"You mind if I get some? I feel like getting high tonight. Nobody else seems to have any.\"

\"Cool. You can ride with me.\" We left the party and I still wasn\'t sure what he was. Normally my gaydar is perfect.

It was about 2 o\'clock in the morning, and Harry and I were as high as you could get. My head was cloudy, my eyes were red and blurry. But I wasn\'t that high to forget what I came there for. He had his stash in his room so we sat on the bed. I felt the sensation I was feeling flow down to my spot and start to heat up. I wanted Harry and Andrew Payne gets what he wants. I slid closer to him on the bed and gently rubbed his strong abdomen. When I noticed he didn\'t try to slam me into a wall and kick my ass, I turned my body to him and pulled him to me by his shirt. I was caught a bit off guard when he kissed me first. ~Well, that settles that.~ I thought. Having full intention of being the aggressor during this little meeting, it back fired when Harry pushed me back on the bed. Which of course, I had no problem with. He stood up and stripped infront of me, and I must say.......I was impressed with what I saw. He climbed back on top of me. \"I\'ve been watching you for some time now.\" He started unbuckling my belt. \"Going to class, hanging out with your friends,\" He unzipped my pants. \"I always hoped you would finally see me and talk to me.\" He pulled my sweater over my head.

\"You surely didn\'t look like you were interested.\"

He kissed my neck and I closed my eyes. \"I didn\'t want to look too obvious. I guess I was too nervous. You\'re just so well put together and unique.\" He put his hand down my slacks and grabbed a handful of.....me. I gasped. \"But, I\'m not now though.\" Off came my pants. \"I want to have sex with you so badly.\"

\"Then do it.\" I said smiling seductively at him. Without hesitation, we started having slow sex. It was good......very good. But the professor\'s was great. And I started thinking about him and I wondered, should I be doing this? When it was over, I grabbed my clothes and left for home.

\"Where the hell were you?\" Richard asked me as soon as I walked inside. He sounded like my mother. \"It\'s four in the morning.\" He came out his room in his red boxers.

\"I was at a friend\'s apartment. Why are you still up?\"

\"I was waiting for you.\"

\"How was the party? Did the campus police stop by?\"

\"Yep. That\'s why me and Bianca left early. Then, when I found out I couldn\'t find you, I\'ve been up all night wondering when you were going to show.\" He looked at my red eyes. \"You\'re high!\" He smelled the air. \"And drunk too! Exactly what did you do at that friend\'s apartment?\"

I couldn\'t hold back my smile. \"Nothing.\" I walked into the kitchen and started fixing myself some coffee.

\"Nothing my ass. You had sex with some body. Who was it? It wasn\'t Peter I bet.\" I thought I heard a twinge of jealousy in his voice.

\"This guy named Harry Benson.\"

\"Was it good? Would I like him?\"

\"It was Ok and yes, you would like him.\"

\"You going to see him again?\"

I stopped putting creme in my cup and just looked at it. \"No.\"

\"No? Why not?\"

\"Because the whole time I was with him, I thought about the professor. I can\'t cheat on him.\"

Richard sighed. \"Drew, you are so clueless. You don\'t know what type of person you\'re missing out on.\"

\"That\'s alright. I know who I want.\"

\"I hope so. For your sake anyway.\"

Luckily, I didn\'t have a class until 1:00, so I slept in. When I woke up that afternoon, I showered and dressed in khaki slacks and a fitted green short sleeve shirt and walked to my literature class. It was boring. There was nothing but geeks, drama buffs who dress in all black, and fully striaght guys that I knew I had no chance with. But there was one relatively good thing in that class-- Camile Brooke. She\'s been flirting with me since school started and though I\'m not that in to girls, I found it entertaining. She sits next to me, so we completely omit Professor Finley and talk. \"So when are you going to let me fuck you?\" She up and asked me. I couldn\'t help but giggle a bit.

\"When you grow a penis.\"

\"You don\'t like girls or something?\"

\"No. I like girls. Just not as much as I do guys. Girls are too much trouble. Always afraid of taking alittle pain during sex.\"

\"You just haven\'t found the right girl that enjoys pain.\"

\"Is that what you are? One of those girls?\"

\"Maybe.\"

\"Oh, so you like getting smacked on the ass and all that?\"

\"Perhaps. You could find out if you\'d just call me.\"

I laughed. \"We\'ll see.\"

Class was over within an hour and forty five minutes and I decided to have a teacher/student conference with the professor. \"Are you just playing games with me?\" I asked Peter as I shut the door to his office. \"I need to know. What are you planning on doing?\"

\"Listen Andrew,\" He said to me in his thick American tone. I had already forgave him when he spoke, but I wasn\'t going to let him know it. He placed his hands on the sides of my arms. \"I want to be with you. Me and Grace......we\'ve been kind of rocky these past few months- we can barely stand to look at each other- and we\'re going to get a divorce. Then, it\'s just gonna be me and you.\" He walked closer to me and with one hand on my neck, he started kissing the other side. \"And I\'ll take all your clothes off and make love to you until the next morning.\" He started licking and sucking on my neck in the same spot until I got this blood red mark on my neck. Damn, he always gets to me.

\"And what is that Mr. Lover Boy?\" Gina said as I spotted her leaving the football field from another grueling day of band practice. She\'s rather good by the way- is a part of the band\'s drum line- and she knows it. Every year, the band goes to state competitions. She came over in a navy blue hooded sweat shirt and bright yellow sweat pants; our school colors. She took my face and turned it to the side. \"You\'ve got a hickey. Did you know who give that to you?\"

I smiled. \"Oh, you mean the guy that\'s gonna hurt my feelings? Yes, he did.\"

\"You may be right about him, he might just like you.\"

\"Oh, I believe it\'s a bit more than that, Gina.\"

\"Still though, be careful.\"

I rolled my eyes. \"Where\'s Wesley?\"

\"You know how it is when you\'re a pledge. You are cut off from all of the outside world. Why don\'t you pledge? You might enjoy guys telling you what to do.\"

I laughed. \"Tempting, but no. I\'m not the fraternity type.\"

She laughed. \"Oh! Did you hear about Bianca?\"

\"No. What?\"

\"Bianca\'s got her man.\"

\"Bianca? Miss I am woman, hear me roar? Who is it?\"

\"Some guy named Tony Parillo. They\'ve actually been dating for a few months now, and they just now started coming out about the relationship.\"

\"Wow. Good for her.\" How could a girl who is so womanly independent, find love? What is it that I\'m doing wrong? Why can\'t I be happy? Why can\'t I be happy with the professor? Why is there always something blocking us from moving forward? This whole LOVE thing is bull shit. They never happen to people who want them the most. I became so tense.

It turned 3:00, and I normally do my yoga by this time. I especially needed it that day. I went home, removed my clothes, put on a pair of black biker shorts, grabbed a towel, and my CD player and walked to the big grassy area below the Magna Ellis building. The same building the professor is in. I laid out my towel right outside his window so he could get a good view of me. Popping in a Dido CD, I started doing my yoga. Normally when doing my exercise, girls (especially freshman) would gather around me and smile. I\'m always a favorite with the ladies........it\'s just too bad I don\'t have that big of a desire for them. If I did, I would be unstoppable in the sex department. It\'s funny how yoga works.....atleast for me anyway. The stretching, monitoring of the breathing, and switching to different positions (my favorite is on my belly, when I sit up on my hands and arch my back while breathing out slowly) is not only relaxing but sensual, envigorating, and makes me feel extremely sexy. Most of the time, I have to quit because I\'ll end up getting too aroused for my biker shorts to hide. While doing one of my more erotic positions, I look up to the professor\'s office window to see if he\'s watching. I do. Not during the whole exercise, but enough for him to get a hard on the next time I see him. Sex is always better after doing a vigorous yoga work out. You should try it.

Two weeks later, me and Bianca were at my loft and I fixed us spagetti and salad. We sat and ate, but while she was talking, I tried to pay attention to her, but I couldn\'t. I was looking at her, but not at her. More like through her I guess you could say. \"Drew, are you alright? You look like something\'s on your mind.\"

I sat there with my fork in my plate, twirling it around my spagetti. \"I........Nothing. Just thinking.\"

\"About what?\"

\"Peter.\"

\"Andrew....\"

\"It\'s been two weeks and there has been no sign of him getting a divorce.\"

\"You don\'t know that, Drew. He might be doing it right now and is just waiting until the deal is set before he comes to you. Maybe he doesn\'t want you to get your hopes up just in case this may become messy.\"

I put my fork down. \"Then lets go then.\"

\"What?\"

\"Let\'s go see if he\'s doing it right now.\"

I drove her and I in my black Eclipse to the professor\'s house. He lived in the suburbs, with a average size brick house and paved driveway. I parked the car in the side of the street, shut the lights off, and turned the ignition off. I turned and looked inside the house through the sheer curtains and saw the dining room. There sat Peter and his wife. \"Andrew?\" Bianca whispered.

\"Shhhhh.\" I said to her softly.

I watched as I saw Peter playfully grab her and set her down on his lap. His arms were wrapped lovingly around her and a smile of pure satisfaction was across his face. My blood was boiling. I was really pissed when she leaned down to his face and kissed him. For a long time. My eyes started to water. My ears grew hot. Jokes. That was all he was playing- Jokes. And I was the butt of it all. He wasn\'t going to leave his wife. He was going to keep telling me lies so I would forget about it, just so he could satisfy his hidden side. Well, he wasn\'t going to get the best of me. No one gets the best of Andrew Payne. I opened the car door and stepped out. \"Drew, what are you doing?\"

\"Stay in the car, Bianca.\" I shut the door and walked down the driveway. I got to the door and knocked. I hoped his wife would answer, it would make my little scheme flow perfectly. To my luck, she did.

\"Hello?\" The red headed woman said to me smiling from ear to ear.

\"Hi. My name is Andrew Payne. I\'m in Professor Cambridge\'s history class. I have a question to ask him about tonight\'s homework. It\'s most important that I see him.\"

\"Sure.\" She said as she opened the door wider. \"Come on in.\"

I marched into the dining room and nearly burst into laughter as I saw a look of pure horror on Peter\'s face. \"An...Andrew. What brings you here?\"

\"I have something to tell you Professor Cambridge. Actually, it\'s for the both of you, so I find that funny that the two of you are here.\" A smile of absolute payback was apparent on my face. Peter knew it too.

\"What is it Andrew?\" The lady asked me.

\"I just wanted to say to Peter......It\'s Ok. I understand.\"

His wife got confused. \"What are you talking about?\"

\"I\'m talking about me and Peter........\"

\"Andrew.\" Peter blurted out.

\"No. Let me finish. I understand why you would want to stay married to your wife. Got to keep that squeaky clean reputation at the university perfect. For people to find out that you\'ve spent every afternoon for the past three months fucking me would surely get you thrown out on your ass.\"

\"What did you say?!\" His wife shouted. \"Peter, you had sex with this boy?\"

\"Oh yes.\" I interupted. \"Every afternoon after my class with him was over. Sometimes twice a day when I finish my yoga........\"

\"Damn it Andrew!\" He yelled. I didn\'t give a damn. I was having fun.

\"He\'d always say he liked me when I was sweaty. He said it made it easier for him to fuck me. Cause you know us Professor, we always decide to have sex when we never have any K Y.\" I smiled. The two of them were speechless. Peter\'s face was red with embarrassment and his wife was in tears. \"That\'s all I wanted to say. Y\'all have a good night.\" I left the house and climbed back in the car. When she saw my face starting to cover with tears Bianca started staring at me with this worried look in her eyes.

\"Andrew, what happened in there?\"

\"Nothing happened.\" I answered her as I started up the car. \"And it never will again.\"

After I dropped off Bianca, I went back to the loft and walked straight to my room. Richard was already sleep, so I didn\'t have to tell him what happened. The way I was feeling right then, I didn\'t feel much like talking anyway. I showered and dove striaght into bed. With the pillow pressed over my face, I cried like baby. From that moment on, I swore off LOVE and took on lust. Anything with two legs was my motto.

I was so depressed, I skipped all my classes for the rest of that week. The weekend came and everyone was driving home for Valentine\'s Day; the worst day in the world for singles. All my friends, including Pledge Wesley, went home. I always dream of going home and spending time with my parents, but I have become too........liberated to ever go home. How would they take me when they saw my feminine actions and gestures. Or my wandering eyes for the men. My parents are so conservative and so well known in the community as having the perfect family, they\'d disown me if I told them.

So instead, I stayed back at the loft and stared at the ceiling from my bed while listening to the song, Wild Horses. \"Damn, I\'m bored.\" I thought to myself. \"No one here but me, no person in my life to talk to. What am I supposed to do? I could have sex. But with who? Everyone\'s gone home. Camile. Camile didn\'t leave, I could call her.\"

\"Hello?\" Camile said.

\"Hey, Camile. It\'s Drew.\"

\"Hey Drew.\" She said in her sexy voice. \"What\'s up?\"

\"I could ask you the same question.\"

She laughed. \"What\'s this about, Drew?\"

\"I want to come over. You doing anything?\"

\"Nope. Now for this little visit, should I turn down my bed?\"

I laughed. \"You might want to.\"

I hung up with her, showered and put on a pair of jeans, black polo shirt, and black Converses. Once I got to her apartment, we completely skipped the small talk and went right to the bedroom. I started to have sex with her and it was Ok, she was vocal, scratching my back, even panting, she was just............a bit dry. She never got wet, which completely fucks up the whole experience. When it was over, she decided she wanted to talk. I didn\'t feel like talking. So, I used the same method striaght guys use when they want the girl to stop talking. I kissed her sweatly, put my finger to her lips, and shushed her. I fell asleep a few minutes later. After that day, Camile has put it upon herself to sneak up on me and kiss me all over my face and call me five times a day. I will never be so desperate that I go to her for sex again.

\"What did you do to that girl?\" Wesley asked me while we were all at the cafe\' that following Wednesday afternoon.

\"Nothing. We just had sex. Now she\'s acting like we\'re a couple or something. Watch, next she\'ll call me and talk to me about wedding invitations, in-laws, and children.\"

\"And we know that\'s not going to happen.\" Gina said. \"Marriage and Andrew Payne don\'t mix.\"

\"I might get married.\"

\"To who?\" Richard asked me. \"The professor?\" There was that hint of what sounded like jealousy come out his mouth again. Just what the hell was up his ass, I wondered. I gave him a quick questioning look.

\"No. I\'ve given him up.\" I wasn\'t about to tell them that he was playing me. Especially not to Gina. She was the one who always told me to watch out for him. So, no way. I wouldn\'t give her the satisfaction of knowing she was right about him. I\'d never live it down.

\"You\'re kidding?\"

\"No. I was not getting anywhere with him.\"

\"You dated anyone else?\"

\"Yeah. I went out with this guy named Cris something. He was gorgeous. Tall, dark hair, built. We went to a party outside of town and got high and drunk. Afterwards, he says he wants to take me back to his place. So I say lets go. We\'re kissing and all that, then we get to the bedroom. I\'m naked and under the bedsheets, ready to go.\" I start to giggle. \"He strips infront of me and my jaw dropped. His penis was no bigger than my ring finger.\" The group starts laughing.

\"Did you leave?\" Bianca asked me.

\"No. Like a fool, I stayed. He apparently didn\'t see anything wrong with his thing, so he crawled on top of me and we had sex. I didn\'t feel a damn thing. I didn\'t even know he started, until he began calling me baby and groaning. During it, all I thought about was I\'m laying here doing nothing and I could be at home watching Friends. I wonder if they are showing the Brad Pitt episode again. Poor thing. Cris didn\'t know he sucked.\" They all laughed.

While in the cafeteria, I got word of a party being held at a fraternity house that night, so I dressed myself in a black cashmere sweater and slacks and went solo to the party. The house was packed. Girls were dancing together in groups, guys were flirting and shooting quarters, and I was completely absorbed at it all. I love parties. No matter how low I may feel, nothing brings me peace like getting dressed for a night of dancing, laughing, and drinking. But of course, I always find some lonely wallflower waiting to be picked.

Short dark hair, blue eyes, and slender build. He wore a blue sweater with his gold fraternity symbols on it. I walked over to where he was and spoke. \"Hi.\"

\"Hey.\"

\"Why are you standing over here alone? You not the party type?\" I leaned up against the wall next to him, but not too close because I wanted to get a feel of who he was.

\"Not really.\"

\"Well, what do you like?\" Boys. Please say boys.

\"X. You into that stuff?\" That\'ll work too.

\"I\'ve never tried it. But I\'m willing to give it a shot.\"

\"Cool. Come on it\'s upstairs in our den.\" I followed the guy upstairs where no party member was allowed, and I sat on the couch. He walked over to a desk and pulled out a ziploc bag full of pills and set them on the table infront of me. We both downed some and soon we both were high as kites. I slouched down in the chair as I started feeling the sensation. Bobby -was his name- sat down on the floor across from me and we were both quiet for a minute.

Bobby eventually fell asleep. Me on the other hand-I couldn\'t stop staring at him. His physique, the contours of his mouth, the strong chin, and his soft hair gave me the biggest erection. I grabbed the pillow next to me and covered myself as I unzipped my slacks and slowly stroked myself. I figured he wasn\'t gay, instead he was just a guy looking for a friend, so this was as close as I was to get to having sex with him. It was also the best sex I had had in weeks, which was sad. The only time this ever happened was if I had someone stroking it for me, before we moved on to other things.

That was pretty much how my relationships were after Peter. Pitiful. I soon realized that I was destined to be alone. I was not mean\'t to have anyone in my life. It came to me while I was at home making my bed one morning. I sat on the edge of the bed and sobbed. Richard heard me and he knocked on my door and came in. \"Drew, you Ok?\"

\"No.\" He kneeled down infront of me and placed his hands on my knees. \"My life is shit.\"

\"What?\"

\"Why can\'t I be happy, Richard? Why can\'t I have someone in my life that only wants me and not my body? What\'s wrong with me?\"

\"Nothing is wrong with you.\"

\"Then what\'s wrong with my love life?\"

\"Nothing. You just haven\'t found that right person.\"

\"Get real, Richard. The right person is not out there. Believe me. I\'ve checked.\" I wiped my eyes.

\"Maybe you\'re searching too far away. Maybe the right person for you is right under your nose.\"

I stared at him through my red teary eyes. \"What?\"

\"I could be that person, Andrew.\"

I laughed alittle. \"You don\'t love me.\"

\"Yes. I do. Very much.\"

\"Why didn\'t you say anything earlier?\"

\"I thought maybe I wasn\'t the one. That maybe I was feeling that way because we lived together.\"

\"That\'s why you were so worried about me when I left that party.\" I cocked an eyebrow. \"And that\'s why you\'ve been sounding upset whenever I talk about one of my dates.\"

\"You have no idea how hard it\'s been listening to the people you\'ve been with and knowing that it wasn\'t me. Inside though, I was happy that those relationships didn\'t work out. But I was really scared when you were getting serious with the professor. I thought I was going to lose you before I even had you. I love you.\" I was speechless. I couldn\'t form any words. I just looked at him. He came towards my face and kissed me. He leaned me back on the bed and whispered in my ear, \"Let me make love to you, Andrew.\" I did. It was the best feeling in the world. After all that searching and numerous bad dates, I never realized I would find love with my very best friend.

When it was over, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him. \"I love you, Dick.\" We both laughed. We stayed in bed and talked for what seemed like forever.

That same afternoon, all of us met at the cafe\' again and had a round of coffees. Richard was running late. His lab class had to stay and write an analysis. \"What\'s going on with you, Andrew?\" Gina asked me. \"You\'re.........You\'re glowing.\" She said sounding shocked. I can\'t lie. I was glowing.

I started to laugh. \"Shut up, Gina.\"

\"You slut. You got some today, didn\'t you?\"

\"With who?\" Wesley asked as he put down his cup. Just in time. Richard walked in and came to our table. I smiled as I stood up and gave him a long kiss on the lips. \"I can\'t believe it!\" Wesley\'s jaw dropped.

\"You two are.......\" Bianca was dumbfounded. We broke away and looked at our stumped friends.

\"That\'s so cute.\" Gina blurted. Richard and I sat next to each other. \"So you two are serious?\"

\"I think so.\" Richard said as he looked at me.

\"We are.\" I answered. \"Very.\"

So there you have it. My love life in a nutshell. After college, Richard and I found a home in town and are planning our wedding. Gina stayed at school and became the band instructor. Wesley became a lawyer and lives with his girlfriend, who\'s his paralegal. And Bianca dumped Tony just after we graduated and became an ad executive.