Cold

Cold

Chapter 1: Who I Am

Well...here I am. The girl you'll never truly know. The girl everyone knows as "The stupid slut in the corner." Why are you reading my journal? Well, it doesn't matter now. I don't care. Read as much as you please.

Though I doubt you'll understand. No, you won't. But note that you're not wasting your time. And I'll bet you didn't understand that. Typical.

Now...where to begin. Oh, yes. I'm here, in my house. Not home, house.

There is no such thing as home. But don't doubt that I wish for one. For someone to truly care about me and put a roof over my head because they WANT to...I've wanted that my whole life. And I regret saying that. What life? I've been living a lie...

It's midnight and my only source of light is the moon. The pretty, dazzling moon. I'll never be able to catch someone's eye like that. No one will ever like me. I'll never have any friends. Never.

I serve as a slave in a noble house. Well that's what they call it. Noble? What a lie. What kind of slave am I? I serve different purposes each day. Now do you understand why people call me "The stupid slut in the corner"? Well, if you don't, maybe I'm not the stupid one.

I don't have a choice of what I want to do. Last time I argued, I got beat. Hard. Well, people might call it hard. But it felt like a simple nudge. A whip breaking my skin feeling like a small touch? I know, it sounds like I'm trying to be dramatic, but I'm not. Everything just feels so empty. There's nothing left to feel but hate, longing, and sometimes even lust.

Why the empty feeling? I've got no one to trust. I was a total mistake. Yes. A mistake. My mother got raped by some creep. He didn't feel bad at all. Went on with his life. My mom killed herself a day after I was born. She didn't want to take the time to name me. She hated me from the time she found out she was pregnant. Didn't want me, didn't need me, she just didn't care. Wanted me out of her life. So she took her own life. Doesn't she sound like the perfect mother?

I think not.

The word 'I' is used a lot in this entry. Why? Because I can't refer to myself as 'I' when I'm serving. I'm 'Pet'. Pet serves master, Pet gets nothing in return.

Now I'm wondering if I'm supposed to capitalize Pet.

Today was normal. Want to hear about it? Well, I don't care what your answer is. I'm going to tell you wether you like it or not.

Like usual, I woke up on the floor. I brushed the dust off of my arms. My eyes finally came into focus as they adjusted to the bright sunlight.

"Pet! Get down here!"

That awful, husky voice. The voice of my Master, October. Nice name, horrible person.

I hurried quickly down the stairs and stood at attention. I lined up with all of the other girls that had gotten chosen for this stupid 'job'. They call it a job! That's just pathetic.

They named each girl and made sure evryone was there. I stood out the most. I'm the only girl who gets called Pet. Probably because I've been around the longest. And the fact that I have no name.

I'm nameless.

Once the count was done (me being at the end of the line), something rather interesting happened. A petite girl with freckles that I've never seen before was thrown roughly beside me. She looked so dumbfounded, with her eyes wide with fear and sitting on her ass because someone threw her. I reached down to help her.

Wrong move.

I was hit was that stupid whip. On my arm. I started bleedingediaediately and drew my arm back. No helping this girl.

"She can get up on her own. What're you? Stupid?" October taunted.

I didn't answer. What was I supposed to do? Smile like some idiot on drugs and shout "Yes!" while beaming like I just founded a new country? Once again, I think not.

"Answer me, bitch. You stupid?"

I had no choice.

"Yes, Master, Pet is stupid. Pet is stupid compared to Master's wits," I said, trying not to sound pissed off.

"So don't help 'er. Got it?"

"Yes, Master."

October smiled like that idiot on drugs I mentioned earlier. Probably because he IS an idiot on drugs. As he walked away to check over the other girls, I glared at his stupid whip. The thought of that thing made me sick. The crusty leather handle, the loud noise it made when cracked, the dried blood on it...

I was pulled rudely out o tho thoughts as I heard the whip stike again. I looked to see who the poor victim was. It was a shy girl; her name was Angelina.

"Answer my fucking question, you bitch! Are you a whore?" October yelled. I felt sorry for the poor girl. I've gotten into the situation before. Not fun.

"Yes, Master...I'm a whore," she said quietly. I could tell she was holding back tears.

I would explain more, but I can't right now...I think I hear October coming...so more later...


To Be Continued....


Author's Note: Please review my story. I would very much like to hear what you have to say about it. Flame me, and I'll be laughing. Flames are funny. If you don't want to be laughed at, contructive critisism is the way to go. Okay...well, hope you enjoyed chapter one. There's more where it came from.