Promises Made To Be Broken
folder
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
807
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
807
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Promises Made To Be Broken
Author: Hiriyou
Description: Yeah, yeah, I know. \"Not another one! *groan*\" Too bad. There\'s more than this as it is. This one has sexual content (not graphic) and talks of drug usage.
Promises Made To Be Broken
Tonight is somebody new. Somebody I've never seen before, and probably won't see again. Just like last night. And the night before it, and all the other nights up until now.
This is my release. My outlet from the world where I can forget that anything exists. Including me. All the nameless bodies and faces don't exist. I can touch them, taste them, fuck them... but the don't exist. Just more ways to lose myself and the world around me in a haze of filth and excitement.
People here call me a slut, call me easy. I don't care. It's true, so why fight the truth? They let me come here, maybe even want me here. So I come. And I fuck. And I leave before anybody even notices I was there.
And exactly like last night I have another body giving off warmth I cannot feel. Or maybe it's just the side effects of tonight's addiction. The self-nominated leader of this place gave me something. I don't know what it was. I didn't care then, and I still don't now. He gives me something almost every night I come. Something to smoke, something to drink, something to inject. Just something to lose the feel.
Tonight's body is pushing me back onto the crusty mattress. I don't care who they are, what they look like, or what parts they have. As long as they're willing, they can do whatever they want to me. I can feel him as he enters me. It should hurt... but it doesn't. That's disappointment for me. Usually I look forward to the pain, but this guy was careful, so it didn't.
Careful? I want to laugh in my head, but it's too fucked up with whatever I was given, to laugh. I think he was worried more about ripping the thin latex condom then he was about hurting me. Not everybody uses them, but some people have heard the stories about me so they know if they want to stay healthy they should. Rumors still circulate about how I've gotten every STD twice over. They don't even lower their voices when I come around anymore.
Truthfully, I probably have. But I wouldn't know. I don't go to get checked. Used to, but it became so redundant I just began to stop caring whether or not I had anything. People can worry about themselves, I won't. Not when I can't even worry about myself.
Tomorrow, I promise myself, I won't come. Just like every night before now, I swear that tonight is the last time. That tomorrow everything is going to magically get better and I can live happily ever after. I know it's not true. But I love to kid myself and tell myself lies. It makes it so much easier to bear the ones that aren't told by me. Tomorrow I may come, or I may die. But either way... tomorrow, I know, I won't stop coming because of the promise made tonight.
Description: Yeah, yeah, I know. \"Not another one! *groan*\" Too bad. There\'s more than this as it is. This one has sexual content (not graphic) and talks of drug usage.
Promises Made To Be Broken
Tonight is somebody new. Somebody I've never seen before, and probably won't see again. Just like last night. And the night before it, and all the other nights up until now.
This is my release. My outlet from the world where I can forget that anything exists. Including me. All the nameless bodies and faces don't exist. I can touch them, taste them, fuck them... but the don't exist. Just more ways to lose myself and the world around me in a haze of filth and excitement.
People here call me a slut, call me easy. I don't care. It's true, so why fight the truth? They let me come here, maybe even want me here. So I come. And I fuck. And I leave before anybody even notices I was there.
And exactly like last night I have another body giving off warmth I cannot feel. Or maybe it's just the side effects of tonight's addiction. The self-nominated leader of this place gave me something. I don't know what it was. I didn't care then, and I still don't now. He gives me something almost every night I come. Something to smoke, something to drink, something to inject. Just something to lose the feel.
Tonight's body is pushing me back onto the crusty mattress. I don't care who they are, what they look like, or what parts they have. As long as they're willing, they can do whatever they want to me. I can feel him as he enters me. It should hurt... but it doesn't. That's disappointment for me. Usually I look forward to the pain, but this guy was careful, so it didn't.
Careful? I want to laugh in my head, but it's too fucked up with whatever I was given, to laugh. I think he was worried more about ripping the thin latex condom then he was about hurting me. Not everybody uses them, but some people have heard the stories about me so they know if they want to stay healthy they should. Rumors still circulate about how I've gotten every STD twice over. They don't even lower their voices when I come around anymore.
Truthfully, I probably have. But I wouldn't know. I don't go to get checked. Used to, but it became so redundant I just began to stop caring whether or not I had anything. People can worry about themselves, I won't. Not when I can't even worry about myself.
Tomorrow, I promise myself, I won't come. Just like every night before now, I swear that tonight is the last time. That tomorrow everything is going to magically get better and I can live happily ever after. I know it's not true. But I love to kid myself and tell myself lies. It makes it so much easier to bear the ones that aren't told by me. Tomorrow I may come, or I may die. But either way... tomorrow, I know, I won't stop coming because of the promise made tonight.