In My Mother's Footsteps

In My Mother’s Footsteps
Part 9
By Entervixen

The world around me spun, or was that me that was spinning? Either way it went, things were not the way they should have been. There was no up or down, or any direction, and what little there was to make sense of swam in dizzying circles about me. There was nothing to focus on, nothing to help anchor me. It didn’t matter if my eyes were open or shut, at that point I couldn’t even tell if I had eyes or if they were working properly. The tension built up inside of me, reaching levels that I never knew they could, until I felt like I would die, or go mad, or both. Perhaps I was dead. Perhaps this was what death was, just a confusing display of colors and objects and nonsense, or perhaps it was truly madness, and I was forever lost within the maze of my mind, unable to ever come back.

A steady breeze of cool relief slowly broke through the madness, causing it all to slow down just a bit. Bit by bit I became more aware of myself, though unable to open or close my eyes. My throat, what I assumed was my throat, felt raw and abused, and I could feel gentle hands on my forehead, weighing me down so that the world slowed down a bit more. The cool breeze came from the hands on my forehead, chasing the madness/death away and cooling off the inferno that raged in chaotic circles about me. Things began to make more and more sense as the reality I was accustomed to returned. Voices drifted above me, around me, hands held onto my legs and arms. More sensation returned, and I could tell that whoever was holding my head together had partly pulled me into his lap. I did not know how I knew it was a man, but somehow, I could tell. His energy wasn’t the soft, soothing energy of a woman, but the subtle and unmistakable energy that a man’s could be.

“She will be fine, Angela, please give us room to work.”

The first real words found their way through the chaos inside me, and I was aware again. I was still taken by that dizzying spell that was gripping me, but I was no longer completely ruled by it. My eyelids were heavy, my lashes steel cables resting upon my cheeks, but I forced them to open just a bit. The light stung my eyes, forcing a groan from me, but I forced myself to open them all the way. I would be damned if I let this, whatever it was, best me. Echoes resounded in my head, the dim remnants of whatever had struck me, but I knew it wasn’t mine, or aimed at me. My eyes were open, unseeing but for the brightness that permeated everything, so I thrashed, not knowing what else to do.

“Angela, please!”

“Why is she screaming Gideon’s name?” There were rustling noises, murmurs, but nothing I could make out aside from Mother’s voice and whoever was holding my head. “Damon, Cuthbert, go check on the boys. Now!” Mother’s roar shook the stone walls, echoing the way that only a mother‘s could.

“Judith? Judith, can you hear me?” Those hands at my forehead, calloused but gentle, stroked my hair away from my face. “Judith, please answer me.”

Thinking was getting easier, but I couldn’t form words as I was still too ridden by whatever madness had gripped me. The only clear images in my mind were the two I didn’t want to see, but they were all that were clear to me. The scream had been Gideon’s, and I knew why. Thomas was trapped in a dream, a maze that the Minotaur could not escape from, and Gideon had tried to pull him out. Gideon had touched upon our brother’s captor, and it held him in it’s steely grip now. My eyes burned, and those hands moved down my face, wiping away my tears. A groan escaped me, but I still couldn’t speak. What I went through had been nothing but a pale shadow to my brothers’ torment. In his last moment, Gideon had reached out and touched the first person he could; me. Gideon had called to me for help, but had been able to do nothing but almost drag me down with him. My tears flowed faster, and I managed one harsh, broken word, “Gideon.”

There was movement, which upset the delicate balance between chaos and stability within me. I groaned, feeling sick, but knew that I would not be trapped, not yet.

“What about Gideon? What’s happened to Gideon?” Mother’s anguished cry filled my ears and sent colored streaks across my vision, a visual interpretation of the pain in her voice. “Michael, what in the hell happened?”

“Your majesty, please calm down. You are not helping Judith in this manner.” Urk’s, or perhaps Eric’s, smooth baritone floated over me, granting a bit of strength to me and clearing my vision just enough for me to make out who was with me. It had been Urk who had spoken, who was also holding my legs down. Eric held my arms against my side, partly pinning me in Michael’s lap. “Until we get Judith stabilized, she will not be able to tell us anything.”

“What the hell am I supposed to do? Stand here and watch while my children are taken from me, bit by bit? One son is gone in mind, my daughter is on the floor, possibly dying, and we do not know of my third son. What the fuck am I to do, pretend things are fine? That this happens every day?” The note of enraged hysteria in her voice all but made me smile. Mother usually held better composure than I did, but I had to get my general temperament from someone.

Michael’s hand on my head kept me from thrashing too much from where I was. “Angela, please calm down and go to your sons. Judith will recover, but it is your boys that need you the most right now.”

“I will not leave my daughter for dead!”

Michael sighed. “Things will be fine. Eric, Urk and I will be able to handle this. I am not saying that there is no cause for concern, but your boys and your unborn child need you more right now. Please, your Majesty, go to them.”

Michael rarely used Mother’s title, which was probably what helped to calm her down enough to think. “Come get me if there is any change. *Any* change, you hear me?” She still sounded upset, and there was no one that would blame her, but the edge of defeat that hollowed her words made me shudder, afraid.

It was Eric who answered this time.” Of course, My Queen. We would not think to do otherwise.”

“And stop with the goddamn titles.”

I could all but see Eric smile as Mother started walking away. “Of course, Angela.”

The three of them waited until Mother had left before Michael addressed whoever was left. “Gabriel, Liam, I understand you want to help, but right now your abilities are best placed elsewhere.”

Liam said nothing, but Father grunted. “I trust you to get me, Michael, when things have been…worked out.”

“I will inform everyone of Judith’s condition when it changes. Until then, please allow us room to work.”

Listening to the conversation without being able to actually see anybody was wreaking havoc with my mind, stomach, and other parts of my anatomy. My head started to spin again as my stomach flopped about in my abdomen and colored streaks flowed through my limbs, eliciting a tingling sensation that bordered on painful. Perhaps it was a good sign that I had that much sensation now in my body, but I still did not want to throw up on anybody.

No one spoke for long moments, but for that I was very glad. No speaking meant no odd sensations and visions, and those I could do without. I was still trapped, though, trapped somewhere in my mind, partly in touch with my body, and unable to reconnect the two to make me whole. The madness hovering at the edges of my sanity tempted me with its false promises of relief, of bonds broken and true, unrestrained emotions, actions, me. It coaxed and sang to me much as I thought the sirens coaxed seamen to their deaths upon the rocks so very long ago.

There were no words, no warning of what was to come, just a subtle but noticeable change in the air, emanating from the three dragons holding me down. Each one produced a different feel, almost taste, that was distinct, but as it built it all melded with one another so that it was hard to separate. Michael’s essence flowed along the metaphysical lines of my body, caressing and comforting the open, raw psychic wounds and binding them closed; what had to be Urk’s formed a shield between me and what had almost brought about my demise, protecting me from further harm and allowing a bit of clarity to shine through the muddled landscape of my thoughts. Eric’s gave a soft warning, a soft pulsing thrust, then ripped into me. Fire roared through me, hot and scalding, burning away the taint of the poison within my mind. Aloud I screamed, but the three of them held me down as Eric burned everything away. Michael held my metaphysical wounds closed as the infection within them was burned off, leaving no trace of the taint. Urk used his shield between me and what was riding me to cut me off so that nothing further happened, but Eric still had more to do. The mind poison had seeped deep into me, deeper than I realized, and had a strong hold on me. Eric leaned on it more, pouring more of the fire through my veins until I thought I would combust and take them with me, but still it remained, a parasite deeply embedded and not willing to give up without a fight. My dragon awoke and screamed her fury at being subdued and subjected to such treatment, her thundering scream tearing its way from my throat and shaking the stone walls. Her anger at the situation brought on a well of energy, pure dragon fire that consumed me alive, thrusting Eric and Urk out as it ate at the infection within. Somehow Michael kept his hold on me, sealing the wounds that were never visible to the naked eye as my dragon, my power, gave him strength.

As suddenly as she had awoken and voiced her rage, though, my dragon fell silent, retreating into the corner of my mind where she rested, content to slumber unless wanting something. The images, the sickness, all had faded with her retreat, so I chanced opening one eye, ready to shut it at the first sign of, well, anything. But there was nothing, the ceiling above me and Michael’s face, a mixed expression of relief, amusement, and worry etched deep into him. Carefully, I moved my head a bit to look at Urk, who looked surprised, and Eric, who looked shocked. “Forgive me, princess, but I did not realize you held such great potential.” Eric looked almost abashed. “If I knew, I would have done things a bit differently.”

“There is nothing to apologize for, Eric; I don’t think that I knew either.”

Urk suddenly turned his head away, but Michael’s snort told me that there was something on his face that Urk didn’t want to give away. “If it helps you feel better, Eric, I didn’t either.” He fell silent again, hands dropping from my temples to my shoulders, lightly resting there for a moment before dropping all together. “Perhaps if you are feeling well, now, Judith, we should get up. I promised your mother and father I would let them know.”

Urk and Eric both let me go when Michael finished, so I sat up and schooled my face blank. “Of course.” I didn’t meet Michael’s eyes as I spoke, but I knew what I would see there; it was what Urk had been trying to hide from me and what I was starting to dread. Michael was going to want to have a little talk with me after informing my parents of what happened, and I was not looking forward to that particular discussion. Not one bit.