Blue

Niki- Uh, I understood what you meant, I just forgot where I was heading with the whole education thing. I just mean he didn’t get to be around other people, so he acts and thinks different. There isn’t really any models for him.

MustLove_PrettyBoys- It’s not like she’s blaming him. She said herself that she didn’t know how she never thought to tell him. She’s just a little miffed that he didn’t know what Ashton meant. Whether she thinks it’s Eli’s fault or Ashton’s, is something else all together.

---

Eli had waited the rest of the day, and Ashton never showed up. It was starting to worry Eli, and the pacing was getting on Mama’s nerves, when she finally came out of her room, to get dinner ready.

There was still one week left until the full moon.

The next morning was hot and bright. It came with a beautiful morning sky, many bird callings, and, to Eli’s delight and slight distress, Ashton.

He came up to the door, rabbit in hand, a slight smile on his face and a glint in his eye.

Ugh, Ashton was a morning person. Eli definitely wasn’t.

Mama didn’t say a word as she accepted the rabbit, didn’t look him once in the eye. Ashton didn’t seem to notice a thing was off, especially when he saw Eli, his smile turning into a full-blown grin.

Eli blushed, looking away slight as he stepped outside as Mama passed him, to ready the rabbit.

“What… what have you been up to?” Eli asked awkwardly, but if Ashton noticed, he didn’t say a word, and his smile didn‘t waver.

“Getting things ready,” Ashton answered, a meaningful look in his eye, and immediately guilt lanced through the red wolf’s body.

Neither said a word as the walked towards the woods, but Eli just couldn’t stop thinking, which led to an even stronger feeling of guilt, but he quelled it down, not letting it show as he turned to Ashton.

“So, want to help me find something?” He asked, an idea coming to mind. Mama still wasn’t happy with him, and he knew the perfect way to lighten her mood.

“Sure, what is it?” Ashton asked, his shoulder bumping against Eli’s.

“Mama needs herbs, her stock is running low.” Eli answered, feeling the heat radiating off the other’s arm when it stayed pressed against him. It was kind of… nice.

“Is that so?”

“Mmhm.”

“What should I be looking for, then?” Ashton asked curiously, and Eli only shrugged, “I guess I’ll just follow you until we find out, then.”

Eli nodded. Yes, that sounded like a good idea. He knew what he’d be looking for. Mama used to take him out herb hunting whenever she felt up to it, and made sure he knew what to look for, so that he could look without her, whenever she needed them but didn’t have the want to do so.

They walked through the woods, Eli stopping every now and then; checking places that looked like good places that would grow the type of herb he was looking for.

Some that he saw, he told Ashton what Mama had told him, the use of the ones that he picked, and the bad effects of the ones he ignored. For a while, he didn’t even think Ashton was listening, but then the white wolf started asking questions, seeming interested in Eli’s knowledge, making him flush as he answered.

Soon, they got to a small clearing, large roots riddling the ground under their feet. A few herbs grew in between the roots, and Eli crouched to check if they were what he wanted.

He didn’t notice what Ashton was doing until the wolf was crouched in front of him, a mischievous smirk on his face.

“What?” Eli asked with a shy smile, curious when Ashton moved forward slightly. Before Eli knew it, Ashton’s head was at his chest, putting pressure on him, before the red wolf fell back on the ground.

“Hey!” He yelped as he went down, hearing laughing above him. Eli glared at the white wolf, before getting a glint in his eye, not unlike the one Ashton had earlier.

Ashton didn’t even have time to shield himself as Eli launched himself forward, pouncing on his new prey, who gave an ‘Oomph’ as they went down.

Eli looked down from his place atop the white wolf, matching smirks on their faces.

He licked his lips, before moving back, still crouching as Ashton got up, in the same position.

Eli was the first to move.

For the next hour or so was filled with pouncing and guards let down purposefully and playful growling, until they were both laying spread out on the ground, panting from exhaustion.

“I haven’t done that since I was a pup.” Ashton let out a deep laugh after he caught his breath, he looked over at Eli.

“Same here, I suppose.”

“You suppose?”

Eli shrugged the best he could from his position.

“The only one I had to play with was Mama, and she usually got tired early on.” Eli explained. This was the first time he’d ever actually been able to completely let loose with another person.

He looked over when he heard movement coming from Ashton, who was shifting to move closer to the smaller wolf.

“Guess we’ll have to do this more often.”

“That sounds… fun.” Eli said truthfully. It really, really did. He liked the idea of being able to play with someone for once. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad with Ashton as a mate.

When he thought that, guilt went through him again. The need to at least tell Ashton of the misunderstanding weighed heavily on Eli’s mind, but he didn’t know what he should do. Mama had told him that Ashton wouldn’t let it go, but either way, Eli hated keeping it to himself. He felt like he was messing with Ashton’s mind, and he couldn’t stand the thought of Ashton hating him for it if he found out.

Just… wait a little while longer. Maybe that feeling would go away.

“We should probably be heading back,” Eli really didn’t want to. He liked being here, the quiet between the two of them that wasn’t awkward, which had become almost rare the more Eli knew Ashton.

“What about the herbs?”

“Crap.” The herbs? They were everywhere. Most of them had been smooshed from the wolves romping around earlier.

“I’ll see if there are any we can save.” Ashton chuckled. Eli only nodded, but stayed where he was, too content to move. Instead, he watched as the white wolf moved around.

It just occurred to him, but while they were playing Eli didn’t notice once that Ashton was still completely naked, the wrap he’d worn a few days earlier having been blown away in the storm.

Crap.

Wonderful, really, now he got to be embarrassed for the rest of the day.

He was still getting used to it. The nakedness.

If they mated, they’d both be naked, and doing more than playing.

And what about afterwards? He expected Ashton to find them a place to live. He might be able to convince the wolf to come live with him and Mama, if Mama was fine with it, but still, what about clothes?

He’d worry about that later.

---

Aston left soon after dinner, once again. And, once again, Eli saw him off.

When the wolf was gone, Mama came up behind him.

“Seems you had some fun while you were away.” Mama said to him, her voice soft and wistful.

“Mama?”

“He’ll be good to you, you know.” Eli had a feeling she was right. “And good breeding too.”

“Mama!” Eli’s skin heated up.

“What? You think I don’t have eyes?” The mood lightened lightly. “And besides, I was young once, too.”

Mama shivered as a cold wind blew, before turning around, intending on going inside. She looked back once.

“I better be getting a lot of pups from you, you hear?”

“Mama!

---

For the rest of the week, Eli and Ashton walked in the woods, giving the red wolf ample time to ask questions he’d always wanted to know, especially about other wolves. He danced around the topic of mating, and didn’t bring up what he expected to happen soon.

But, the more he and Ashton talked, the more he felt guilty. It kept building up, until finally, the morning before the day they were to run, Eli had the resolve to tell him.

They went for the woods, both quiet. Ashton seemed to realize that something was on Eli’s mind, and left him alone to bring it up himself.

The nervousness was radiating off of Eli, and finally they stopped.

“Ash? Can we talk?” Eli managed not to stumble over his words, but he couldn’t look at the wolf.

“What about?” Ashton sounded tense, like he knew what Eli wanted to say.

“About… tomorrow night?” Eli finally looked up, Ashton’s eyes full of confusion, and a hint of fear.

“What about?” Ashton’s voice was soft as he urged the red wolf on.

“I just… I need to ask you something, first.” Eli had had doubt, he‘d been thinking on it for the past few days. Maybe he and Mama read this wrong? First he had to know. “What did you mean, when you asked if I’d run with you?”

“Eli, you don’t-” Eli cut him off.

“Just tell me, okay?” He bit his lip, unable to look Ashton in the eye again. The other wolf stepped in front of him, a hand raising to his cheek.

“I want to be your mate.” Ashton answered blatantly, and Eli let out a sigh.

“I-I thought so.” The red wolf licked his dry lips.

“Then what do you seem so worried about?” The reply Ashton received was a whine. “Eli.”

“Because I didn’t know when you first asked.” There, he got it out. Finally.

But… Ashton didn’t look happy.

“You don’t want to be with me.” It was a statement.

“N-no… yes. I-I don’t know.” Eli still wasn’t sure. He was still torn between whether he wanted to be with Ashton or not.

“Oh.” Ashton swallowed. “Okay.”

“Okay?” This was going all wrong. Eli answered wrong. He should have just said yes. No, he shouldn’t have even bothered asking.

“Okay.” Ashton repeated, his eyes blank.

“No, not okay.” The wolf whined. He hated confrontations so badly.

“Look, I’m not going to force you to be with me. You said you didn’t want to be. I’m sorry to assu-”

“No! I didn’t say no. Well, I did, but that’s not what I meant. I don’t know. I like you, Ashton. I really do. But…” Eli trailed off, biting his lip.

“But what?” His voice was cold, and the red wolf flinched slightly.

“But… it’s just; you’re the only other wolf I’ve ever met, besides Mama. I don’t want to fool either of us just because of the prospect of finally having a mate. I don’t want to do that to you.”

And it was true. Eli wouldn’t hurt him like that. He was still so confused. He’d thought about it and thought about it, but he just couldn’t find what he was looking for. He wanted to be with Ashton, he really did, but he doubted his feelings. He didn’t want to confuse what they had for just friendship, if even that.

“Eli…”

“Look. I just… I need to think a little more, please? I mean, I like the idea of being your mate, I just want to make sure that I really want to be your mate.”

Ashton nodded slowly. “Fine.”

“Ash?”

“I’ll wait for you, tomorrow night, at the clearing. If you don’t come, I won’t bother you again.”

With that, Ashton was gone in a flash of white.