A Dark and Stormy Night

“And the next thing I knew, it was over.” James said with a snap of his fingers. “Just like that.”
Kat gave him a sympathetic face. “She didn’t give you any reason?”

“I tried to ask her a couple of times why she did it, but I never got an answer. But I figured out why for myself.”

“Why did she do it?”

“Because Marcus is better looking and popular.”

Kat made a face. “That stupid Marcus.” She sighed as she looked at the ceiling of the coach’s room. She really felt bad for J, the more she got to know him, the more and more he seemed like a decent guy, even if he had been mean to her when they first met. Looking at him out of the corner of her eye, she could see the sadness on his face. J hadn’t been lying, he had truly been in love with the girl, and she had ripped him apart with such ease that it was sickening. She didn’t know why, but it sparked a deep feeling in her, one she had never known before. After biting her lower lip softly, Kat looked back at him. “So, how have you been managing it?”

“Not very well.” James said in a sad voice.

“Well, hasn’t anyone been there to help you?” Kat frowned. “You know, offer support. Your friends? Your parents?”

James weakly rolled his eyes. “Yeah right, fat lot of good they were to me. Every one of my friends has a girlfriend, and they aren’t shy about showing them off in front of me. And my parents,” James chuckled sarcastically. “They haven’t been any better. All my dad told me was that at my age, I’m going to get my heart broken at least once no matter what I do. And my mom, she just told me that it was Clarissa’s loss.”

“Well it seems like your parents were trying to help.” Kat told him, trying to sound sympathetic. “I’m sure they meant well.”

“It doesn’t matter.” James moaned as he buried his face into his knees which were tightly tucked into his chest. “I was stupid.”

“Stupid?”

“For ever thinking that someone could really love a hideous troll like me.”

Kat silently brought a hand over her mouth, trying her best to not make a sound as she let J’s words fill her mind. He wasn’t looking at her, which she was glad. There was no way she could handle the embarrassment of him seeing that her eyes were watering up. More than that, she was afraid of what he might think of her if he realized that she was on the verge of tears because of his pain. Seeing him like that, Kat was brought back to the days of the last few weeks. Specifically the Monday of last week. She had been sitting inside the school’s band room practicing on her flute during lunch break. She had taken a few moments from playing to eat the lunch her mother had made for her. After she had taken a bite from the sandwich, she heard it. Crying. Curious, she had peeked out one of the windows at the back of the room, which had a view of the end of a hallway, and she saw him. He had been no one she had ever recognized, but that hardly mattered. She could see him pulled up into a really small ball in a corner of the hall where no one could see him, and that tears were freely flowing down his face. Kat had been so stunned by the sight that she had just stood there watching him. A million different feelings passed through her as she watched him. There were so many thoughts of sadness and sympathy going through her that Kat hadn’t known what to do at the time, except stare at him with a great sadness in her own eyes. There had been a moment, just one, where she had been about to get off of the chair she had been standing on, go out to the unknown boy, and see if he was alright. But just as her first foot had come down from chair, the bell rang that lunch was over. Before Kat could do or say anything, he had jumped to his feet and disappeared in a flash. She spent most of that first day lost in thought, wondering who he was and why he had been crying. Above all else, she had felt really bad that she hadn’t had the time to go and see if she could help him. By the end of that first day, though, she had almost completely forgotten about it. And by the second day, she didn’t have another thought about it. Which was why she had been completely shocked to hear crying again during lunch break at the same place. Looking again, she was stunned to see him there yet again. And like she had done the day before, Kat had watched him with sadness, wanting to go out to him yet too afraid of what might happen if she did. So watching was all she had done. It had almost turned into a routine over the next two weeks as she watched the boy sitting all alone. He had gotten a little better in that time, his crying had stopped after the third day, but he still looked so distant and empty. The more she had watched him, the more Kat had wanted to know about why he was there, and if she could maybe help him. In fact, she had finally made her mind up earlier in the day that if he was still out there on the Monday of next week, she would go to him and see if there was anything that she could do.

And here she was now, with him right next to her, and she was finally able to do what she had wished for two whole weeks. Of course, she hadn’t realized that the boy she had been watching all those days had been James. Not until she heard him crying earlier in the bathroom, then she had made the connection instantly. There was a sort of strange, and even scary, irony of the fact that James was the boy she had been watching and desiring to help. Kat slowly, tentatively placed her hand on his shoulder. She felt his body shudder from her touch, but she kept it there and began to softly rub his back.

“J.” she said in low voice. “You can’t blame yourself for what happened. If she could have done something so heartless like that, then she never really loved you.”

He looked up at her with his bloodshot eyes. “I know.” he whispered. “I should have realized…but I didn’t want to see it.”

“J.”

“Thanks Kat,” he said with a faint smile. “You’re…you’re really kind to me. More than I deserve you to be.”

Kat looked down at her feet. She could feel her face growing hot with embarrassment, and was sure that her cheeks were turning a deep shade of pink. “You…you’re welcome J.”

To her complete shock, Kat suddenly realized that J had his hand resting on hers. His thumb rubbed the skin on the back of her hand, sending waves of shivers and goose bumps up her arm. Kat felt her chest tighten from his touch as she nervously looked up at him. He was staring at her, his smile just a little bigger. Kat stared at him, straight into his eyes, and it almost seemed to her like time had frozen. She had never really looked someone in the eyes before, and J’s were so intriguing. The portion of his iris that rimmed the pupils was a light green, the color of a field of grass. The green gradually gave way to a light brown the further out his iris went. It was a strange combination of eye color, but for J, the mixture was really pretty looking. Kat forced herself to look away from his gaze, fearing that she would become lost in them. Her mother had once told her that eyes were the window to a person’s soul, and she was scared to see what was inside J’s. Specifically, what he thought of her. J seemed to sense it as well. Clearing his throat, J stood up stretched.

“Well,” he said with a slightly yawn, tough she was sure she detected embarrassment in his voice. “I’m going to go get some water. You want me to bring you some back?”

“Y…yes…” Kat replied weakly, looking back down at her feet.

“I’ll be right back Kat.”

She looked at his back as he left. For a few moments after he left, she didn’t say anything. Then bringing her hands up to feel her warm face, Kat sighed softly.

“You’re mom was right J,” she said with a faint smile on her lips. “It was her loss.”

**

He felt strangely at ease now, and it was kind of scary for him to think that. James still felt a lot of guilt running through him for having spied on Kat, but she didn’t seem to have realized that he had. Now, he was determined to put what he had done behind him. And the best way that he could think of to do that was to just be as nice to Kat as he could be. Taking up the cups of water, James actually found his mood getting brighter as he returned to the room. He found Kat exactly where she had been when he left her. Only this time, she had her I-pod back out and her marching jacket rolled up behind her head. James could see in her eyes that she was starting to get sleepy. A quick glance at his watch told him exactly why. It was almost two in the morning. It was nearly unbelievable to him that so much had occurred in roughly a four hour period. And if that much had happened, what would at least the next six hours bring? He was too scared to even think about it. Trying to push any more thoughts from his mind, James sat next to Kat and offered her the cup of water.

“Thanks J.” she said in a teasing voice, lightly punching him on the shoulder.

James chuckled a little before leaning back against the wall. He drank down the whole cup of water without so much as saying another word. When he was done, he saw one of the earphones to Kat’s I-pod being held in front of his face. Looking over at her, he gave Kat a not very serious look of worry. She worked to suppress a smile upon seeing his face.

“No more boy bands.” she told him. “I promise.”

“Ok.” he said weakly. “But I’m really putting my trust in you here Kat.”

“Your trust won’t be in vain.”

He slipped the earphone in and leaned back into the wall. As he did, James could help but glance at Kat out of the corner of his eye. When he did, he regretted it. Kat was bent over slightly, searching through her I-pod for suitable songs, all the while completely oblivious to the fact that she had given him a direct eye view of seeing down her shirt. James stared at her cleavage for several moments and quickly felt the pace of his heart beat quicken. Memories of Kat’s shady, yet nude, body showering in the stall less than an hour ago caused a very expected reaction in his body. Feeling the heat mounting inside him, James abruptly pulled his eyes away from Kat’s exposed skin and shifted his body nervously away from her so she couldn’t see what she was doing to him. Even though he was looking away, there was simply no erasing the image that his eyes had witnessed.

“J?”

James glanced quickly over his shoulder at her before turning his head away again. He couldn’t let her find out. He couldn’t.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” he told her in a distant voice. “just thinking.”

“About what?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Are you…”

“It’s nothing.” he said in a slightly louder voice. As he stared at the far wall across from him, he begged for nothing more than to just have the swirling semi-erotic images in his head disappear and for Kat to drop the subject. It was too much to hope for to get both, but at least he got one.

“Ok.” Kat said weakly, the tone of her voice easily giving away that she didn’t believe him. But like she had done several times before, Kat chose not to press the issue. James wouldn’t bring himself to look at her for fear that she might some how decipher exactly what kind of thoughts were dancing around in his mind. Without another word, Kat turned on the music. It wasn’t the usual fast paced rock he was used to, and thankfully it wasn’t that boy band crap either. It was a combination of slow music which was a combination of a piano, violins, and flutes. Classical music. James really didn’t see what was so classical about it, but he did focus on the flute portion of the tunes. Closing his eyes, he let their melody fill his attention. Gradually, the less than pleasant thoughts he was having faded as the music continued. However, they were replaced by another memory far more powerful than all the others. Listening to the flutes brought James back to the earlier time in the night, and the way Kat’s unnatural ability to play her own flute had somehow mysteriously brought a peace to his withered and torn heart. The more he thought on it, the clearer the image he had of her sitting in the corner of the room, so confident, so at ease with her situation, and her gentle face so breath taking.
James’ eyes flew open at that last thought. Had…had he really thought at that moment that she was…pretty. Not just male driven lust, which he was sure any guy would get upon seeing bare female flesh in front of them, but actual, genuine attraction to her. As the questions began to pile on in his confused mind, James felt a weight gently strike his shoulder. The touch cause his body to freeze and his breath to fail him. For a moment, he was frozen. Then, with his body beginning to twitch nervously, he looked at his shoulder. Looking down, James was stunned to see Kat’s head resting against him. He heard her light breathing and saw her chest slowly rising and falling. It was almost impossible to believe, but she was asleep. Staring down at her, James was at a complete loss for what to do. Clarissa had never, ever fallen asleep on him. In fact, she had never even wanted to cuddle with him, which was yet another painful reminder to him that she had never really loved him. But the thing that seemed the funniest to James now was that, he didn’t really think about Clarissa, and he no longer felt the pain of what she had done to him. Those things were little more than afterthoughts to him, now that he had Kat leaning on him.

It wasn’t just confusing for him, it was downright uncomfortable in so many ways. With his face growing hotter with each passing of his breath, James wanted to move her. Just putting her back the way she had been sitting before slouching on him, James knew that it would do a world of wonders for his troubled mind. Going slowly, he gently rested his hand against her head, which he was going to support as he scooted a little bit away from her. But when his fingers touched her still slightly damp hair, Kat moved. James froze completely as Kat shifted slightly where she was sitting. Her left arm swung across his midsection, the hand wrapping lightly around his side in a loose hug. Kat’s head also shifted slightly, moving to where her face was resting against his shoulder instead of the side of her head. The pace of James’ heart quickened as he glanced down fearfully at Kat’s arm pulled around him, then at her face. He realized in that instant, he was trapped. There was no way he could get out of the position he was in without waking her up. And, oddly, he didn’t want to do that. Some part in the back of his mind, the same part he was sure that had fought to keep him from spying on her, wanted it to be this way. Knowing he couldn’t do anything, James settled himself uncomfortably in his position. As the minutes ticked by though, the fear and anxiety faded. It was replaced by warmth. A faint and nurturing heat that came from where he felt their bodies touching. Gulping down a heavy lump in his throat, James looked back down at Kat again.

Her face was covered by shiny strands of her hair, and he could see individual sections swaying slightly from her light breathing. James’ brought his shaking hands up and weakly brushed aside the hair, not really understanding why he did it. When he pushed the last of the black strands aside, all James could do was sit in awe at what he was seeing. He had never really looked at Kat’s face before, until now. And because James hadn’t, he didn’t realize until that moment what he had missed all that time. The roundness of her face, due to her cubby cheeks, had been easily dismissed by him with their first encounter as a flaw. A sort of permanent testament to her slightly heavy body. Now he saw how they gave her fullness, and added to the depths of her sweet smiles. The light shade of pinkish color to her skin that rimmed the top of each of her cheeks was what gave her face that extra shine when she giggled. Her smooth little nose rested perfectly in the center of her face, an unmatchable foundation to the contours of the features that surrounded it. The long, black eyelashes of hers were now clearly visible to him, and made James aware of how they had pulled him into the deep brown color of her eyes. Above all else, he noticed her lips. Slightly thick yet perfectly space, their length contributing to the fullness of the rest of her face. James could barely believe what he was just now noticing, but what he knew was impossibly true. Kat’s full, and damn him for the comparison, slightly pudgy face…was absolutely beautiful.

Beautiful.

That was a crazy word to relate to Kat. At least, it had been hours ago. But now something had changed with James’ perception of her. But why, by all standards that he had known, Kat shouldn’t have seemed pretty, much less beautiful. And as that thought pondered across his mind, the strangest thing happened to James.
He suddenly found himself remembering something from a while back, something that had absolutely no right to have even been remembered by him. His memories pulled him back to a movie he hadn’t seen in years. He couldn’t remember the name of it to save his life. It was that Jack Black movie where he got hypnotized by some T.V. guru guy into thinking that a really fat girl was skinny. James had absolutely no idea where it had come from, but a scene from that movie played out inside his head with such a perfection that James felt as if he was watching it on a television. It was that part where Jack Black’s friend was questioning to the guru guy the morality of brainwashing his friend. It was downright scary to James, but the guru’s words echoed throughout his mind as if the enormous man were standing right in front of him and yelling those next words right into his face.

“Don’t you think you’re brainwashed? Everything you know about beauty is programmed! Television, magazines, movies, they’re all telling you what’s beautiful and what isn’t!”

Hearing those words ripple across his consciousness, James felt as if a great and terrible truth had been revealed to him. When he had first saw Kat, he had automatically thought her unattractive because…everything he had been exposed to in his life had said she wasn’t. And worse, James found himself realizing just how much of an impact it had done upon himself. It was the reason why he had failed time and time again to get dates over the years. It was the reason why he had blindly went after Clarissa without a second thought, because she had possessed all of the physical aspects of what was considered beautiful. And above all else, it was why he always thought so little of himself, because he wasn’t impressively built or possessing a smooth face. Both he and Kat were the unfortunate victims of a mass perception. Neither of them really ‘ugly’, but more importantly, neither of them was what was considered ‘beautiful’. As he absorbed that immense understanding, James looked down at Kat’s peaceful and innocent face. How much suffering had she really gone through because of her weight? How many times had she cried because so many only looked at her with their eyes? In that moment, feeling her nestled up against him, holding to him like she was, he realized for the first time that he wasn’t truly looking at Kat with his own eyes. He was looking at her with his heart. Her kindness, her gentleness, made her look even prettier. Knowing this, James stared intensely at Kat’s slightly parted lips.

Only kissed once, and on a bet. That was the ultimate form of unfairness. Kat didn’t deserve that. She deserved so much better. To be kissed, really kissed, by someone who cared for her and thought that she was pretty just the way she was. Someone…like him. James gulped as he began to notice how soft and slightly moist they were. His eyes darted up at her closed lids, making absolutely sure that she was in fact asleep. Her slow breathing told him beyond all other reason that it was true. Beads of sweat began to form and trickle down the side of his head as James found himself increasingly drawn to Kat’s tempting lips. She was so close to him now, it was so easy. All he had to do was just lean forward a little, and then…

Almost as if he were being drawn in with a magnetic force, James closed his eyes slightly and leaned down. He could feel ragged breath passing between his own lips as he drew closer to Kat’s. The more he looked at hers, the more tempting they became to him. His heart was jack hammering inside his chest at the thought of what he was doing. He felt next to no lust in what he was doing, just a deep, unstoppable affection that was welling up from the inner core of his being. It felt so right, what he was about to do. Like it was something that had been missing for years yet had never realized it until that moment. All of it felt like a dream, and the next thing he knew, his face was only inches away from Kat’s. Being so close to her, he could almost taste how sweet Kat’s lips would be. He shut his eyes and held his breath as he was but a moment away from plunging into a realm he knew nothing of.

In that instant, the heavy vibration of thunder rippled across the roof of the room they were in, and Kat began to stir from her sleep. James pulled away from her as if he had been struck by lightening. Guilt, the same kind he had felt for spying on her, flooded into him. As Kat’s eyes began to flutter from her awakening, James wanted to badly to punch himself in the face. He had no regret about wanting to kiss her, in fact, he was mortified to find himself nearly consumed by the desire to. He thought that she in fact might want him too, she seemed like she had sought it from him more than once. But…not the way he had been going to do it. Not like that. Not having a kiss stolen from her in her sleep. And as Kat began to come around, James forced himself to accept that he would never, ever try to kiss her again. Unless, she let him. As he looked down into her opening eyes, James wanted so, so badly with every drop of his essence to just ask Kat if she would grant that tiny slice of joy to him. But as he continued to stare into her almost sparkling brown eyes, all the words that he wanted to say just died within him. He couldn’t find the strength to bring them out, for he was nearly paralyzed with fear of rejection. A rejection, that if he knew happened, would destroy him, forever.

“J?” she whispered in a low voice, one that sounded so sweet.

James gritted his teeth to hold the urges that were raging through his body in check. He wouldn’t take advantage of Kat again. She deserved so much better than that.

Her eyes gazed up at him questioningly, then they went wide when she realized the way she was leaning against him. A gasp escaped her lips, the kind that he strangely found to be very cute, and she quickly scooted away. Her head held low so her so her hair would hide her face, Kat breathed heavily. “I’m…I’m sorry.”
“It’s alright. I…don’t mind.” James blurted out in a weak voice.

Kat looked up, surprise present all across her face. “Really?”

James cleared his throat as his skin grew hot from Kat’s gaze. He stared at the wall for a few moments before glancing back at Kat. The tightness in his body increased when he saw that she was still staring at him. Her eyes were so full of…well he didn’t know any other way to put it other than hope. But why would she be looking at him with hope? James felt his jaw drop slightly. Could it be, that Kat was glad he had let her snuggle against him. Even more insane to comprehend, could Kat actually be attracted to him. James nervously looked at her, and saw how she quickly averted her eyes with a deeply blushing face. It was like a spark had jolted through his chest. The realization that Kat liked him seemed so unreal, yet what else could the way her face was reddening from his look be other than attraction?

“Kat.” he whispered. She slowly turned her beautiful face to him, which caused him to smile warmly. His heart was pounding in his chest as he thought more and more of what he had wanted to do while Kat was sleeping against him. Now, he was almost certain that Kat wouldn’t say no to him, if all he did was just ask her.
“Kat.” he said again, licking his lips slightly. Unless his eyes were playing tricks on him, he saw a faint shudder go through Kat.

Just say it. His mind thought. You want to. She wants you to.
James opened his mouth and took a deep breath. He was teetering along the edge of something he both was familiar with yet knew nothing of. With but one question, with the right answer to follow it, James would plummet off of that edge and never, ever look back. As the first bit of sound began to form in his throat, a massive thunderclap shook the building.

Kat squealed, pulling herself into a tight little ball as the walls around them rumbled. James immediately forgot about his desire to ask her for a kiss, and instead felt himself become overcome with a desire to comfort her.

“Kat, what’s wrong?”

“I hate storms. Especially thunder.”

“Why?”

Thunder rolled across the roof of the building, causing James to look upward a bit nervously. He then looked back at Kat. Fear was easily present in her eyes, and he found himself instantly consumed with the desire to comfort her. Except he didn’t know how to find the strength to go to her. So he just sat back and listened to what she had to say.

“It happened when I was about five.” Kat whispered nervously. “I woke up to a bad thunderstorm, just like this one. I can remember it as if it had happened just yesterday. I was so scared. Every time the lighting flash and the thunder shook my room, it scared me out of my wits.”

James scooted a little closer to her, feeling very tempted to put his arm around her shivering body.
“Then…a lighting bolt hit the tree across the street, and all the lights went out. I…I tried to run to my parents room, but I tripped over something and fell into my closet.”

Kat closed her eyes and pushed her lips together tightly. After taking in a deep breath, she continued.
“It didn’t have a lock on the inside. I was trapped in there, in total darkness, for almost the whole night, all alone. I can never remember being more terrified than I was then. And I’ve never been able to be in the dark since. It…it makes me feel like I’m dying.”

James felt a deep weight press down on his chest as he watched Kat continued to shake as more and more thunder rolled in. That poor girl, was there no end to her suffering? Didn’t she deserve to be safe, and happy? He weakly placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed gently.

“It’s alright Kat.” he told her. “I’m here. You’re not alone this time.”

She looked up at him, her eyes glimmering slightly in the dim light. “You’re serious? This isn’t a joke?”

“Kat.” James said to her softly. “I would never kid about something like that.”

Lighting struck again. This time very close. The entire foundation of the building vibrated as the massive wave of thunder passed. Kat shut her eyes and screamed. Without the slightest hesitation, she threw her arms around James and squeezed tightly. James was stunned by the sudden clinging of Kat to him, but he relaxed into the feeling a moment later. With her head buried in his chest, he could only hear her faint sobs and feel her body beginning to tremble. She hadn’t been kidding. The coming storm was scaring her to death. James nervously wrapped his arms around Kat and hugged her. “It’s ok.”

Her finger nails dug into his back. James winced from the pain, but he held his tongue. The last thing he wanted to do to Kat in that moment was to make her feel bad for hurting him. As she continued tighten her grip around his waist, James became aware of something else. He had drank a lot of water since he and Kat had been locked in the building, and he hadn’t gone to the bathroom yet. He did his best to ignore it, but as the minutes ticked by, James felt the pressure mounting. Knowing that he couldn’t wait any longer, he bit his lip before speaking.

“Kat.”

Kat pulled her head back so she could look at him. James looked into her brown eyes, wanting to nothing more than to just ignore the discomfort that was quickly becoming unbearable. But he couldn’t.

“Kat,” James sighed. “I have to go to the bathroom.”

He could see her eyes searching into his. It was taking her a second to process what he had said. She instantly shook her head.

“No.” she murmured. “No. James don’t go. Don’t leave me.”

“Kat.” James placed a hand on the side of her smooth face. “I’m only going to be a few rooms away, and I’ll be back in a minute.”

He felt her grip around him slack a little. “Promise?”

“Are you serious?”

“James. Promise me you’ll be right back.”

“Kat, this is…”

“Promise me, please.”

Staring into her desperate eyes, he only then realized just how afraid she really was. And how very badly she needed him to be there for her. James rubbed her cheek. “Alright Kat, I promise I’ll be right back.”

Kat smiled weakly, and released her grip on him. “Ok. Just hurry back J.”

He returned the smile. “I will.” Getting to his feet, James walked out of the room. He glance back once just to see if Kat would be fine without him for a minute or two. Though she looked pretty nervous huddled in the corner of the room, he was sure that she would be fine. Stepping out of the room was a real perception changer. Out in the hall, James could now hear how heavy the rain was coming down. He took a few brisk strides over to one of the windows and peered out. He couldn’t see it, but he could hear the steady rain fall. And it was getting worse. If it was this bad now, how bad was it going to be in an hour? James discovered that he really didn’t want to know. He just wanted to get his business done, and go back to where he was needed. Back to Kat.
Feeling driven by that need, James went into the bathroom and relieved himself. He passed one of the mirrors over the sink, but quickly looked back into it. It was a very strange experience for him, because he was feeling like he was seeing a completely different person. He no longer carried the bitterness in his eyes, or the aggressive tightness on his face. Even though the bruised eye looked bad, he could see beyond it, and it dawned on him how quickly Kat had brought light back into his life. Which was why he needed to get back to her. Smiling both outwardly and inwardly, James grabbed the handle to the door and opened it.

In the instant he did that, three things happened.

First. A massive, insanely powerful bolt of lighting struck somewhere near the field house, because the entire structure trembled as if a bomb had been dropped on it. The sudden explosion caused James to freeze.

Second. All the lights in the building died, pitching him into a blackness unlike anything James had ever known before. The enclosing darkness seemed so overpowering that James felt like he was going to suffocate.

Third. In total abyss, James heard Katlyn scream like she was being murdered.