Different Interests, Different Lives

People at school wondered what happened to Chris, but he kept it to himself and didn’t answer any questions. He didn’t need anymore unwanted attention to bring him to this again. The only one he told was Sam who promised to try and travel with him. He said they wouldn’t get him as long as there was a second person around. That didn’t last long. Even and the other two were on him again even with Sam around. They held Sam back and forced him to watched as they kicked him and tried to break him again. Chris never gave in, and that’s what he told Matt every night when he cleaned his cuts and put ice on his bruises. Matt only asked him once why he didn’t give in.



“Two reasons. If I give in, then I’ll be under their thumb, doing what they want, under their control. I’m tired of being that way,” Chris flinched as the ice was moved to another place on him. “Then there’s how I can’t be something I’m not. I can’t be straight, I can’t suppress it anymore than what’s necessary, I can’t not love you.”



Matt didn’t ask him again, just kissed him there in bed, and suggested he take the day off the next day. Chris agreed and they both went to bed, Chris in Matt’s arms as they slept. Chris woke up late that Tuesday morning long after Matt had gone to school. He didn’t get up immediately; just lay there, his mind turning everything over and over. He doesn’t know them so he can’t confront them, but what will happen after they realize it doesn’t work? Will they go after him and threaten him? Chris sighed and covered his face before getting up to shower and eat. He doubted they would do that, and so since they wouldn’t go after Matt, they would continue to go after Chris. Everyday they would get him and he couldn’t handle it, he couldn’t handle getting beaten in the same places day after day. Sure it wasn’t much different than living with his dad, but his dad would have good days where he would leave Chris alone for a day or so. The thought of dropping out crossed Chris’ mind but he shook it out of his head immediately. He knew that wouldn’t help anything, it may even make his life worse in the long run. Chris thought about it as he showered and as he stepped out and looked at himself in the mirror, he felt to his knees and cried. The only thing in my life that goes right and something puts it in danger. He didn’t know how long he cried for, or know exactly what he cried about. But his heart ached. There was only one other time it felt this way, a time after his mother had left. Then he knew it was about his mother, and now, he was crying for something, something but he didn’t know what it was. Soon he realized just what that thing was that made him cry so much. It was Matt. He was crying for Matt. The only two people in his life to love him and the one that was going right, and he hoped to stay, was at risk. He was still crying when he dressed and when he lay on the couch. Not much happened from then on. Chris didn’t have much of a choice but to sit there because his body hurt so badly. Shortly before Matt got home, he finally stopped crying, but only by choice. He forced himself to stop because Matt, he decided, didn’t need to see him cry, see him hurt more than physically. That would just hurt him too.



As Matt walked in, he said hello and put his things down before going to the couch and kissing him. “How’re you doing?”



Chris lifted back his shirt to show him and said, “Not bad I guess.”



Matt took a look and touched it, making Chris cringe. “I’ll go get some ice for you.”



He went into the kitchen, got it, and came back, grabbing a towel on the way. “What’d you do today?”



Chris shrugged and pulled the shirt back more to allow Matt to lay the ice on him. His eyes stayed on Chris’ face, watching it relax against the pillow he had been leaning against. Running his hand against the cheek facing him, Chris opened an eye and smiled and kept on smiling as he sat up painfully to look straight at him. It looked like he had just heard a funny joke.



“W-What? Lay back down…” Matt stuttered, unable to help himself from smiling back. Chris leaned into his ear and softly bit at it and in a hushed voice began singing low, laughing a bit in between.



“Space boy you’re sleepy now. You’re silhouette is so stationary. You’re released but you’re custody called, and I want to be free, don’t you want to be free?” At this point, Matt recognized the song and had joined in too, singing and laughing softly along with him, “Do you like girls or boys? It’s confusing these days. But Moon dust will cover you, cover you. Hallo Space boy…”



They broke into a fit of laughter, falling back on the couch until the joke between them faded. They looked at each other, smiled and kissed and continued as they undressed and spent that afternoon on the couch, gong at it slow and careful because of Chris’ bruises and injuries, but laughing every little while from the song they sang. And once they had finished, they stayed on the couch lying uncovered in their sweat and heavy breathing, Matt’s head nestled against Chris’.



“I don’t know how we get into it, but it sure is good once we do.” Chris whispered and they laughed again. He looked at Matt and turned on his side to face him. “What about you? What do you think?”



It took Matt a minute to say it but he did, “I only know, that it’s hotter than anything to fuck the person you love?”



Then out of nowhere, he began kissing him and placed his hand between Chris’ legs and making Chris’ groin grow warm. Looking at Matt’s face glisten and his ponytail of blonde hair coming undone and damp with sweat, the heat rushing to his groin grew and he began to get hard quickly. Pulling Matt’s hair out and watching it spill out everywhere, he said, “Agreed.”







Chris went back to school, and became smart about Evan and his lynching. He began taking different routes to classes, changing them everyday to something different. There were a few times he was caught by them and beaten, but soon, they stopped trying altogether. Chris was so relieved along with Matt that they weren’t realizing they should be more worried about them. Matt and Chris began to venture out of the house more in the little time they had relief from the worry of it all, but it was short lived. Matt began to hear rumors circulating through the teachers about a teacher and a student were dating each other. Soon the principal was talking about going around to teachers and talk to them about these rumors, with them and any suspicious students. He soon acted on it and Chris and Matt were questioned, and they both denied it. Still, he kept coming back to them for some reason and Chris began to fear the worst of the situation and told Matt so.



“We can’t do anything,” Matt answered over dinner. “You know we can’t. No matter what we do, someone else will find out like they have now. We just have to hope that they wont tell anyone else.”



Chris nodded and looked down at his plate of food, hiding the tears that were pricking at his eyes. Matt had gone back to eating and as soon as he looked back up at Chris, he saw his shoulders were shaking. He went over to his chair and knelt down by him. Pulling his face from under his black hair, he found Chris’ cheeks streaked with tears and he wiped them gently with his thumb.



“Chris?”



Then Chris’ arms were around his neck and he was crying into him. Matt held him and let him as he cried out, “I don’t want to lose you. I love you, I don’t want you to go. I’m afraid, that’s what I’m afraid of…”



Matt held tighter and rocked him gently, saying sweet things like I know I know, and it’ll be alright. And he cried too. They both cried there in the kitchen well into the night. Chris knew that he shouldn’t have cried but he couldn’t stop himself. So frustrated by everything, by how they were caught in a rut, he couldn’t hold it in anymore and from how Matt reacted to his crying, he knew it was the worse thing he could have done to Matt and himself. Seeing him cry hurt so bad. I seem selfish, but I love him.







The police came late one afternoon. They knocked on the door as any other person would, pleasantly and like a relative coming to visit. But up in the bedroom, between the sheets and Matt between Chris’ legs, they couldn’t hear it. Seeing Matt’s car in the driveway, the police knew there was a good chance they were home, so they kept knocking and kept getting louder and louder until they were banging on it and they could finally hear them. They stopped and looked out towards the door.



“Did you invite Sam over?” Matt asked, before getting out from under the sheets. He walked over to the closet and pulled on a robe.



“No. Sam’s leaving for the coast with his parents today.”



Matt began heading for the door and before he left he said, “Go ahead and get dressed.”



He disappeared down the hall and Chris did as he was told, but slowly, Matt could keep him going for hours but at a price of hardly being able to swing his legs out of bed. Down in the living room, he could hear Matt’s voice and two other gruff ones echoing around the hall up to the room, then they stopped and all he could hear was Matt’s footsteps hurrying up the hardwood stairs, and looked at him standing in the doorway with the color drained from his face.



“The police are here,” he whispered, throwing his robe off and pulling on some clothes. Chris didn’t stop dressing, only moved faster. “I told them you just got out of the shower, go get your hair a little wet.” Chris said he would, but before he left Matt grabbed him. “It’ll be all right, just follow what I say and we’ll be okay.”



He let Chris go and finished dressing before going around him to go downstairs. It took Chris a minute to get moving again from where he stood in the doorway because of the grief he was feeling. So they went to the police! It finally happened…He snapped himself out of that state fast, knowing it wouldn’t help to panic now. He went into the bathroom, did what Matt said and went into the Living room to sit on the couch across from the two bulky police officers. There was a moment of silence before the officer on the right spoke.



“We are sorry to bother you, but we have recently come across some news that you two are having sexual relations.” This officer had a pink scar going from his nose and down the side of his mouth that stretched slightly with the movement of his lips, like a second mouth that yawned every once in a while. “Now because we have heard this information circulate around the school and heard it in the precinct many times, we are coming to ask and investigate this.”



Matt didn’t say anything but just looked down for a moment before Chris finally answered, “No we are not.”



The other officer had a notepad and scribbled something down before asking, “You haven’t lived here long have you? How long ago did you move in?”



“A month or two,” Chris’ hands were placed in fists on his lap and kept tensing from how hurt, angry, and nervous he was, not wondering how they knew he hadn’t lived with Matt for very long.



“What situation did you come here from?”



“Chris’ father was abusive,” Matt answered for Chris, giving him a break and he relaxed visibly. “I noticed it after a good while and decided to talk with Chris about it. We went through the trial and when he was taken out, he’s been here ever since.”



The officer eyed Matt a minute then redirected his attention to Chris. “Which one of you decided you were to move in?”



Chris’ eyes darted from the man talking to him to Matt, back, and away again. “ M-Matt did, sorta.”



“Sorta?”



“He suggested it to me and let me decide on it, I came here of my own free will basically.”



They whispered to each other a minute then asked if Matt could leave the room a minute. He agreed and hoped with out voicing it that Chris would know what to say. When Matt had gone, the two policemen then rounded on him.



“We thought you might be having a hard time discussing this with him around. Now, are you sure he hasn’t done anything to you? He hasn’t tried to get you to kiss him or do things with him that made you uncomfortable?”



The one speaking was trying to sound calming and understanding, but was only patronizing Chris. What am I, eight? “Didn’t I already answer this question? Did I say that no, we are not in a sexual relationship?!” Chris’ voice was getting a bit high and tense the more nervous he got.



“Yes, you did, but…”



“Well then what the fuck is with repeating it? And why do you want to know about how I came to live here?” Chris couldn’t believe these two were going in circles already.



“Well, we just want to make sure that you’re not lying to us,” the officer on the left seemed a bit nervous at the sudden outbursts from Chris, “If there is something going on, we have to just make sure that what you’re saying is true, so that we can get you out of here as soon as we can.”



“Do you think that I would lie to you if I didn’t want to be here? Do you think that if I didn’t want it I would lie to you? Believe me, after coming out of where I was living and how it was, I won’t lie and say otherwise if I’m being abused or treated in a way I shouldn’t.” He stared at them a while, letting all that he said sink in before he got up and stormed out into the den and stood there, shaking out of anger. Without knowing it, he had gone into the room Matt had when asked to leave and only realized so when he came up behind him to hold him. Chris tried to shove him off but he held on tight and told him to calm down, and he did. They stood there, listening to the officers whisper to each other. Matt felt safe to kiss him on his head, but Chris stopped him and slightly tugged on the neck of his shirt, bringing his head down and pressing their lips together. They pulled back and suddenly, Chris was jerked backwards and the officer with the scar was pushing Matt against the couch, cuffing him and reading him his rights.



“No! Stop it!” Chris tried to shove the guy off of him to get to Matt. “Get the fuck off of me! We aren’t doing anything wrong!”



Matt wasn’t fighting it, he just looked at Chris and tears started in his eyes. Seeing this, he cried too. As the officer walked Matt out, he told him what he was being charged with. Class a misdemeanor, two charges of sex abuse, and two or three of sexual misconduct. When they were out the door, Chris finally stopped struggling and listened to the officer talk about how Matt was going to be put away for a long time. He jerked away from him and went upstairs into the bedroom and locked himself in, letting the officer knock on the door to get him to come out. He ignored it and just surveyed the room, his eyes falling on the bed, its covers still a mess from that afternoon. Crawling inside he began crying, and there he stayed until the police finally got the door unlocked and got him to pack up to leave. Things will never be the same. He got in the police car and they took him somewhere. He didn’t care where, and he didn’t remember the trip there. All he knew was that he kept thinking, I already miss you Matt.







Chris guessed he was put in some kind of orphanage, but it was different than what he expected. Most of the kids were his age, old enough to go to high school with him and he saw one or two that did. Every adult around him wanted to make sure he was okay, saying it was alright if he didn’t want to go to school, but that was what he wanted. He didn’t want to be stuck there, listening to people dote on him and talk about him. So he went to school and when he got there, he met up with Sam who could tell immediately something was wrong and asked him.



“Matt and I got caught together.” Chris’ eyes brimmed but didn’t spill over. “He’s going to get some years in jail, and I’ve got no place to go. I’m in and orphanage, or whatever the fuck you call it for kids our age…”



Sam pat him on the shoulder and rubbed it a minute before taking his hand back. “I’m so sorry Chris.”



Chris looked at him and asked, “Do you thin I could live with you and your parents? I know it’s kind of rude to ask, but I don’t want to live with someone who’s just going to worry so much about something they have no idea about.”



“It’s alright. You can live with me and my mom and step-dad. They should be okay with it.”



“Step-dad? What happened to your real dad?” Chris was surprised at this bit of news. Then again, it had been a while since he had talked to Sam about their personal lives so in the back of his mind, he knew he shouldn’t be surprised.



Sam walked towards his class and Chris followed as the bell rang. “Remember when I was in California for a few years? Well I was with my dad. They got a divorce and my dad took me with him claiming that mom was an unfit mother and other things.”



“So why’d you come back up north?” Chris pulled out some gum and handed Sam a piece who declined. Chris chewed his lip when he got extra nervous about something and sometimes it bled so chewing gum helped that a bit. It was actually Sam that advised he chew gum when he was nervous. Even though his attention was on Sam’s story he was still nervous and upset over the situation with Matt.



“Dad and I didn’t get along so he sent me up here to mom’s to live with her and she got a boyfriend who she also married while I was in California. I still go down and see him, but on rare occasions when he actually returns my calls.” Sam looked at Chris then forward again as they neared their classes that were next to each other. “I guess we both haven’t been telling each other everything.”



He waved good-bye and went in the class just as the second bell rang. Chris went to his and sat in the back of the room. I guess he was also going through something. No wonder we lost connection for so long… Chris went through the school day and at the end, he was about to take the bus back to the orphanage, when he saw the bus he saw Sam taking every now and then. Knowing where it would take him, he went to that one and loaded up, sitting in an empty seat near the front where hardly anyone was sitting. Out the window he saw couples everywhere, holding hands, kissing, hugging. Everything Chris and Matt would never be able to do. Lost in thought, he wasn’t aware of a girl hovering over him asking to sit. He said sure and pulled his pack in his lap as the bus started up. It left the parking lot and Chris went back to his thoughts of Matt.



“I haven’t seen you on the bus before, are you new to the school?” The girl wasn’t exactly skinny, but not too pudgy and her milk fed cheekbones made her pleasant smile cheerier than it was.



Chris shook his head. “Just going somewhere different.” His voice sounded strange to him and he wondered if it was just that he hadn’t really spoken much that day.



She nodded at him and her loose brunette curls bounced back and forth like springs. “I kinda am. I moved here over the summer. This is my first year here.”



“Really? I hope you’re liking it.” He replied.



She nodded again then looked a little concerned. “You okay?”



Chris could feel himself start to get irritated but he kept it to himself. He always found it a little eerie how girls were such sensitive beings that if you weren’t feeling okay, they would know it before you even said a word about it. It always seemed as though they knew something you didn’t. But Matt could tell everything I was feeling just by looking at me. Was it because he was gay or because we were in love? Or maybe it was his feminine side kicking in…This made him smile a bit inside himself but it didn’t last long. “Yeah. Something just happened recently to someone dear to me.”



“Oh! I’m sorry! Can you say what?” She then covered her mouth a minute and turned a red color. “Sorry. Everyone tells me I tend to get into everyone’s business.”



“No it’s okay. I don’t mind.” Chris had never met anyone like her. So bubbly and full of energy, someone who you would like immediately. And that was just what he was starting to do. “He had a run-in with the law and is in prison.”



“Who was it? Your dad?” Chris shook his head and she thought a minute then numbered off all the possibilities on her fingers. “Brother? Uncle? Cousin? Brother-in-law? Step-dad? Friend? Grandpa?”



She said many others, but he said no to them all, not even bothering to make a cover up story for it all. He watched her finger tap the seat in agitated thought and Chriss thought she was cute, and would probably be after her if he wasn’t gay. “Was it…you’re boyfriend?”



Chris slightly jumped and stuttered out a denial but she grinned wide at him, showing off her white and straight teeth and said, “You ruled out all my other possibilities. It’s okay if you’re gay…I have some friends who are, it doesn’t bother me.”



Chris looked away with a flushed face and his gaze settled on the passing trees and buildings out the window. “What’s your name?”



“Whitney…and yours?” She asked.



“Chris,” he shook her hand. “Nice to meet you, Whitney.”



Whitney grinned at him then it faded and a quizzical look appeared on her face. “So who’s this guy? Would I know him?”



“No, I don’t think you would.” Chris tried to wave it off, but she pestered him on it. “Look, I don’t mean to sound rude, but why do you want to know?”



“Because you seemed upset about it.” She said simply.



He realized then her intention and though she had, he had asked that question, bringing himself back down to that level of depression he had lived in for the last few days. “His name is Matt…”



“Matt what?” She asked then saw the look on his face and she closed her mouth. “Never mind. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”



“Thank you…” He said softly then gave her a half smile. “I’ll tell you something else though. He went to jail because of me. He’s an adult and we were caught together.”



Whitney’s eyes widened and she swallowed, and then ran her fingers through her hair a minute. “W-Well…”



Chris sighed and looked out the window, a bit irritated with himself for trusting her with his secret. “Forget it…”



She shook her head and touched his shoulder a moment. “No, I’m sorry. It just caught me off guard. Besides, I’m really in no place to judge you.”



He turned a moment and looked at her. “What did you do that’s so bad?”



“Well…” she looked uneasy for a minute then looked down, her curls surrounding and hiding her face. “A guy I was with attacked me once." Her voice dropped to a whisper as she continued her story and Chris looked at her with sympathy and touched her arm. “He didn’t quite completely rape me…I stopped him before it could happen. I wanted to tell someone, I wanted to so badly, but I just couldn’t do it. I was with him until the very end, until he broke up with me a week or so later. Then he went and did the same thing to another girl, but only she told someone, and he got in trouble for it. I regret that I didn’t say anything, and I always feel like a coward when I think about it.” Chris pulled his hand back and watched as she lifted her head to face him and gave him a smile. “You seem brave, going through all this…and so I have no right to judge you on anything when I wasn’t even able to say anything when I was being victimized.”



“You shouldn’t feel that way Whitney…” He said softly.



She gave him a small smile then it was gone a moment. Chris let her sit in the silence a minute and he turned to look out the window as he thought a moment. It’s disgusting how people scare each other so much, that they are willing to feel a certain way just because someone else thinks that way about them… He thought bitterly, realizing he had never thought about that concept until that day. His father had definitely done it to him many times, but only now did he realize it happened to everyone at some point in their lives. “So, what happened with you and Matt?”



“Huh?” Chris looked back at her and she was smiling, a bit happier than before. “Oh…Matt and I were living together for a while, when some people who I thought were my friends caught us and told someone. The police came and now he’s in jail because of me, his job his home, everything is lost because of me…” He looked away from her, anger building inside of him at the realization of what exactly he did to Matt, how he destroyed his life by loving him. “All because of me…We were together and he knew we would get caught, but he stayed with me! He stayed with me because I was so damn selfish. Even when we were caught, when someone saw us, I still wanted to stay with him, because…I loved him so much, I didn’t want to leave him, and I never thought of what it would do to him…I…”



Whitney grabbed his hands and held them in his lap because they were folded together, clasped so tightly that the knuckles were turning white and his nails were threatening to dig into his skin. “Hey…calm down. That doesn’t sound selfish at all, and if it is, then Matt is just as much as you. He probably loved you just as much if he kept you with him, to keep you happy. People have different interests in each other and themselves, and because of that, their lives are different. You shouldn’t feel guilty Chris.”



She let him go when he calmed down and he sighed thankfully to her. They were quiet for most of the ride, and by this time, most everyone had gotten off and the bus was nearly empty. Whitney turned to him and asked, “What stop are you getting off at?”



Chris looked out the window and noticed a few familiar houses and looked back to her. “Soon, you?”



“I can get off almost anywhere. It’s all close to my house,” She smiled and then ran her fingers through her hair, “Mind if I get off with you?”



“Not at all.” Chris was actually relieved that she wanted to come. He enjoyed her company and he enjoyed talking with her. The bus stopped two blocks away from Sam’s house and they got out, making Chris realize Whitney was taller than him by a few inches. She asked him where they were going and Chris answered that it was where he was living with Matt. Whitney didn’t ask any questions, only nodded and smiled softly to him. As they were walking, Chris could see her smile and laugh as she talked and he wondered, what was it that made her so happy?



“We’re here,” Chris stood on tip toe to reach the key that had been left above the door and he opened it, stepping inside with Whitney following behind. Chris looked about while Whitney commented on how nice it was. Memories came flooding back to him in a massive wave and he took a deep breath and began going up the stairs slowly, Whitney’s voice floating behind him and becoming fainter and fainter as he went up the steps to the bedroom, the door still off the hinges. When he was there, he went down into the bedroom and sat down on it, staring out into space. It was then that he realized he was numb the past few days. They had been passing by in a haze, as a fading thought that he couldn’t really comprehend. They had gotten caught. Matt was gone. Just a few days ago, they were in the same bed, together, sharing the same breath, the same air, the same space, and now he was gone.



“You okay?” Whitney knocked on the doorframe before taking a step inside.



“Yeah, I guess.” Chris stayed where he was and Whip sat next to him. She wasn’t all bubbly like she was on the bus anymore and Chris wished she was so he could cheer up too.



“You don’t seem as happy as someone should be, Chris,” she said, “Even as you smiled on the bus, it didn’t seem real. Like it was only half-hearted. Do you miss him that badly?”



He nodded and Whitney saw his look as cold, sort of monotone with nothing in it or behind it. She put an arm around him and even though they just met she put the other around him too in a complete hug. Chris’ expression didn’t change, but he cried inside, his heart aching with the feeling of longing and lost. After Chris felt good enough to get up and leave, they left and Chris took her to Sam’s house to introduce them. They took a liking to each other immediately and just as the three of them were heading upstairs to talk, Sam’s parents stopped Chris to talk to him.



“Sam told us of your predicament and we’d be happy to take you in as well. I’m not sure how you feel about being part of the family,” Sam’s mom smiled at him and motioned at the house, “but you’re welcome here.” Chris had met Sam’s mom only once, but it was at a bad time. She had been fighting with Sam’s dad and her hair was a mess, make-up smeared with tears and running down her cheeks, but now, Chris could see how kind her face actually was.



Chris tried to give her an authentic smile but everyone around him knew it was to cover the pain he felt. “It sounds good to me.”





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hehe so yeah. FINALLY! This is the next chapter of the story. its almost done!

I\'ve been working hard to finish typing it up and I finally got it done!

Next chapter in a few months. What will happen to Chris and Matt now? :O

Find out soon!

Ja ne! ^.^V