Crush

@SWiz I messed up.



@Chay88 what happened?



@SWiz It's hard to talk about.



@Chay88 that bad?



@SWiz Yeah.



@Chay88 all ears.



@SWiz What would u do if u liked someone u shouldn’t & that person liked u back? But by being with that person u could get into serious trouble.



@Chay88 shit! r u talking about a student?



@Chay88 still there?



@Chay88 hello?



@SWiz Maybe it was a mistake coming out here.



@Chay88 no, anything’s better than living a half-life on the rez.



@SWiz I don’t know if I’m *alive* out here either.



@Chay88 u are alive, butthead.



@SWiz It’s lonely. Maybe that’s why I…



@Chay88 u what?



@Chay88 who *is* this guy?



@SWiz A student.



@Chay88 FUCK!



@SWiz Tell me about it.



@Chay88 u haven’t? have u?”



@SWiz ???



@Chay88 had sex?



@SWiz NO!



@Chay88 OTG



@Chay88 what r u going to do?



@SWiz I dunno. Suggestions?



@Chay88 how far has this gone?



@SWiz we kissed.



@Chay88 that all?



@Swiz Isn’t that enough?



@Chay88 yeah, man. that lines been crossed. no going back. u gotta break it off with the kid. don’t have any contact with him.



@Chay88 think he’ll talk?



@SWiz Dunno. I hope not.



@Chay88 tell me about him?



@SWiz Popular. Jock. Handsome & blond. Bout 6’ 3”. Single parent household. Very charismatic. Smart. Friendly. 17.Gay.



@Chay88 no shit on the last one, man.



@SWiz Lol don’t make me laugh. Melancholy here. :-(



@Chay88 has he been hanging around u a lot?



@SWiz Yeah. He came out of the closet to me. I felt responsible for him.



@SWiz Big mistake to think we could be friends. So stupid.



@Chay88 ur not stupid, stupid. i know u. u need human contact. u thrived in that big chaotic family of urs. that’s why it hurt so much when u had to leave.



@SWiz U warned me about going too far away.



@Chay88 i did. I miss u.



@SWiz Miss u too.



@Chay88 stay away from that kid.



@SWiz I will.



@Chay88 keep ur head down. if u have any trouble let me know



@SWiz Ok



@Chay88 have to go. Helen is dragging me to her mom’s house to help her clear the attic this morning.



@SWiz Fun Saturday?



@Chay88 FML



@SWiz XD



@SWiz Do me one favor b4 u log off.



@Chay88 sup?



@SWiz Tap into ur inner geek squad & tell me how to erase every trace of this convo from my pc.



****



After checking his email, Chay logged off his computer, stood and stretched. It was time for him to take a shower and get on with his day. This Saturday would be different without Drew for company.



Then Chay remembered what Andrew had told him before he left. Drew had said he’d be over today. Chay shook his head. “Doesn’t matter if he comes over. Not letting him in.”



Chay would have to be vigilant. He couldn’t sit behind locked doors all day. His new home came with new chores, like cutting the grass and trimming the hedges. He needed some groceries and with Halloween on Sunday he’d have to pick up some candy to hand out to the kids.



Despite whatever may be going on in his personal life, Chay was determined to fulfill the things he’d been dreaming about since he put a down payment on the house. Back on the rez he’d never had the opportunity to hand out candy or go trick or treating. Halloween wasn’t something they ever celebrated.



Chay had decided that he’d give out candy this year. He wasn’t going to let this incident with Drew grind his life to a halt and he didn’t want to be the only house on the block with a dark porch when the children made their rounds.



With plans for the day in place Chay headed for the shower and tried not to think of how bad things could get.



***

I’m sorry.



Chay pressed the button on his cellphone to delete Drew’s text message. It was the fifth one he’d received that day. Drew had tried calling him three times but after Chay let all the calls go to voicemail he had given up. Or at least he had seemed to. Then the text messages started coming.



Chay regretted giving out his number. It was just another mistake in a big heaping pile. Tucking his cellphone back in his pocket, Chay maneuvered his shopping cart down the candy aisle.



Large displays promised the best deals on an assortment of king-size bags of candy. Chay ended up selecting three bags. He finished up his shopping and went through checkout without running into any of the few people he knew in Brighton.



As he was putting the last grocery bag into his car his cellphone started singing, alerting him to another text message. He ignored it,pushed his cart to the proper designated area, got in his car, and drove off.



Even turning up his favorite song on the radio curb the urge he felt to check his cellphone. It was crazy really. He knew that once he checked his message he’d delete it without sending Drew a reply, but he kept wanting to lower the music to see if he would hear that signature sound effect that alerted him to having received a message.



Sending Drew away had been the easy part, but ceasing to think about him was nearly impossible. His mind wanted to rewind back to that kiss. Chay took one hand off the wheel to touch his mouth, thinking to recapture the feel of Drew’s lips against his own. Chay shook his head with disappoint. His hand was a poor substitute.



Chay turned off the main road onto the long stretch of road that led back home. His Corolla was flanked on each side by pine trees. Chay new the speed increased now that he was on the straight away. Steadily he pressed on the gas. About a minute into his drive down the road he noticed that he wasn’t picking up speed. He was losing it.



Shaking his head in denial, Chay watched the speedometer creep toward zero. With a groan he aimed his car toward the shoulder while he still had mobility and eased the break.



With a rattling clunk Chay’s car died.



Knowing it was useless he turned the key in the opposite direction and then tried to start the car up again. It sounded as he expected it to sound: like a dying machine. “I don’t need this right now,” Chay growled, thumping the wheel.



Shifting the car into park he pocketed his car keys, popped the hood and climbed out of the car. A lift of the hood revealed the scent of burning rubber. A small plume of smoke curled up a from a pit of tubes and gears. Chay had no idea what to look for. His knowledge about fixing cars didn’t extend beyond changing a flat tire.



He’d probably do more harm than good if he started poking at things. With a frustrated sigh he slammed the hood back down and fished his cellphone out of his pocket.



When his screen came to life he saw the option to check his texts. There was just the one.



He decided it couldn’t hurt to look and pressed to read his messages. There were only four words.



We need to talk.



Chay deleted the message and hit zero to call 411. After a few seconds an automated machine with a female monotone issued him a greeting and asked him to hit the correct series of numbers on his keypad to answer her questions before she would allow him to get on with the business of calling a towing service.



The machine finally dialed the number for the local towing company. “Pete and Chuck’s Towing, Barbara speaking, how may I help you?”



“Uh, hello,” Chay tucked his hand into his side pocket and shuffled further off the road as a car went flying past. “My car broke down on Woodrow Road. I was coming west from town and I had to pull over on the shoulder. Could I get a tow truck out here, please?”



“Just a minute, honey.” Chay heard rapid typing through his earpiece. “Oh, it looks like all four of our guys are out on calls helping clean up a big traffic accident out in Cleveland. Earliest I can get a truck out to you would be in about two and a half hours. I’m really sorry about this. It’s rare that we’re this busy.”



Chay looked up at the dark sky. In two and a half hours it would be pitch black out. His Popsicles would have melted and he’d probably have to wait until tomorrow to find someone to take a look at his truck. Fuck.



“I don’t suppose you can give me the number to the next nearest tow company?”



“This is Brighton, honey. The second nearest towing company is over in Washington. It’ll take about as long for them to reach you. You could try Earl’s. He’s not a towing company but he has a tow-truck and he fixes cars. Would you like the number?”



“Sure.” Chay had repeated the number so he made sure he remembered it. Barbara took his information in case alternative plans fell through and promised to call him as soon as one of her tow trucks came back.



Chay hung up and called Earl’s. The phone rang several times before an automated voice informed him there was no more room to leave messages and hung up in his ear.



He climbed back into his car and crossed his arms over the steering wheel. Chay looked out at the straight away and the cars flying by. So much for small town friendliness. It looked like big city warniness had finally reached small mid-western towns like Brighton.



Chay’s phone sang again.



He slipped his thumb over one of the buttons to wake the screen.



I need to see you.



Sitting back, Chay contemplated the screen and his options: Sit out here for two hours, where there were no street lights and it’d soon be dark enough so that he couldn’t see his hand if it was in front of his face or…



A foolish thought took hold.








********************

Internet shorthand used in this chapter mean the following:



OTG= Oh, Thank God



FML=Fuck My Life