Heart of Stone

7. The Conflicted

On the way back Mary was conflicted. She knew he wasn't happy about what he had done, and once the initial pain faded she was angry. When they were in the air though, she simply lay in his arms, seething. When they got inside Mary made the excuse of needing to look at the monthly bills and left him in the sitting room upstairs. She devoted a few minutes to scanning the books and then moved on to magazines. Half of her hoped Aiden wouldn't come looking for her, the other half was afraid that he wouldn't.

The one thing she wasn't confused about was her anger. She HAD lied, and she DID know how he felt about that but she was also a grown woman who didn't deserve to be punished like a little girl just because she was jealous. That was something she had never been able to control and probably never would be able to control, no matter how many times he punished her.

Finally she was too tired to stay downstairs any longer. She walked upstairs as quietly as she could, hoping she could slip into bed without him noticing her presence. She wasn't entirely certain how she thought she would sleep without him, Aiden always held her until just before sun rise. She decided to worry about that if it happened. When she entered the bedroom it was empty. By the time she had closed the door quietly behind herself Aiden had appeared in the sitting room doorway.

“Were the accounts as you wanted them?” He asked, keeping his distance.

“Yes.” She couldn't meet his eyes and she found that her knees were shaking.

“It is late, you must be tired.” His voice was as gentle as it always was. Mary nodded and escaped into the bathroom. She spent longer than usual getting ready for bed. When she was putting on her robe she caught sight of her bottom. It was a dull pinkish in comparison to the rest of her pale skin except for one dark, oblong blue-black bruise on the right cheek. Mary pulled the robe around herself and fussed with straightening things on shelves, and refolding towels, anything to keep from going out there again. When there was no more primping to be done she walked out into the dim room. Aiden was stretched out in bed and she knew he was naked under the covers because they both relished the feeling of skin to skin contact. At that moment, she wasn't sure that's what she wanted.

He didn't look at her but the way the end of his tail twitched she knew he was growing impatient. Mary dropped the robe on the chair next to the bed and got under the blankets quickly. She had planned to rest against him, but not to snuggle like she usually did. His arm came around her though and the feeling of his warm skin brought up all those feelings that she had worked so hard all evening to suppress. Mary whimpered softly.

“Tell me.” He said softly.

“I'm so-” Mary's voice caught in her throat and tears welled up in her eyes. “So ANGRY at you.”

“Why?” She looked up at him. His eyes were focused on hers, but the tone in his voice told her that he knew the answer, but he wanted to hear her say it.

“Because it was humiliating and you made me feel like I was five years old.” Mary sniffled and still felt that way all over again.

“You behaved like a naughty child. If you had simply told me of your uncertainties when I asked I would have had no reason to punish you. I have told you repeatedly that you have nothing to hide from me, but for some reason you still feel compelled to secrecy.” His talons stroked lightly through her hair, his tail wrapped around her leg.

“I said I was sorry, and you didn't have to leave a bruise.” She was pouting a little now. He sat up straight and looked at her.

“I did not.” He pulled her across his lap and Mary whimpered sharply, suddenly terrified that he was going to hit her again. When he lightly touched the edges of the mark, Mary jumped. Aiden released her and when she got up she could see the pain in his eyes. She snuggled against him hesitantly and he held her as if she might break. Aiden sighed deeply and Mary tightened her arms around him, molding her body to his. “It was not my intent to injure you, child. You must know that.”

“I know.” She felt tears filling her eyes again, but they were less for her own pain and more for his. “I'm sorry I was jealous, I couldn't help it.” He lifted her chin and looked into her eyes.

“Do you believe that that is why I punished you?” He sounded genuinely surprised. One hand caressed her bruised bottom softly.

“Well, yes.” Mary was equally surprised. She relaxed against him and enjoyed his touch again, without thinking about it. “I mean I know I lied and that upset you, but I thought it was more that I was jealous.”

“Child, your emotions are neither right or wrong. I would no sooner punish you for having a feeling than I would for coughing. If you had simply told me how you felt we would have discussed it and moved forward from there. Did you aunt punish you for what you felt?” The pads of his fingers were stroking lightly over her skin. Mary didn't trust her voice and she nodded, his arms tightened around her again and his tail softly gripped her leg. She forgot her anger and embarrassment and once again he was her source of nurturing comfort. “You will be recovered from your beginnings, sweet one. I will not apologize for correcting you, but will you forgive me for bruising you?”

“Yes.” Mary said softly.

“And are you still angry?” He pulled the covers up over shoulders and a little sigh escaped Mary's lips and the last of the tension left her body.

“A little.” She said. She felt his low chuckle more than she heard it.

“I can live with that.” He kissed her forehead and Mary found his lips with hers. On most nights she would have settled next to him, but this wasn't most nights. She closed her eyes and fell asleep on his chest.


For the next three months Mary concentrated on learning magic. At first the books were incomprehensible but Aiden was a patient guide through the basics. She found that once she mastered those the rest came very naturally to her. There were a few bumps along the way, one of the largest was when Mary misspoke and prevented Aiden's transformation from stone to flesh. It took her over a week to find her mistake and how to reverse it.

When Aiden finally woke Mary was afraid that he would be angry with her. He was annoyed, but that was because the spell she used was imperfect. His physical desires were not quelled and he had spent that time hungry, thirsty and in need of sex. After being without him for that length of time, Mary found that her need for him was just as great. The beast in him slipped the fetters of his control in that encounter and she was left with long, deep scratches on her hips and Aiden's guilt. They were healing relatively well and even though she was surprisingly uninjured in her more delicate areas it was becoming clear that he wouldn't let go of his worry until she was healed completely.

Mary wasn't thinking about his guilt as she paced in the sitting room though. She barely heard the balcony door open and close.

“Mary,” His eyebrows were drawn together as he looked at her. “You will only command your new abilities if you can control them.”

At first Mary was confused, until she followed the direction of his gaze and looked over her head. She blushed a bit as she waved her hand through the dark, swirling thoughtforms that chased each other there, dissipating them like so much smoke.

“Sorry.” He lifted her Mary kissed him, holding on with her arms and legs longer than usual. “I guess I was just worrying and not thinking about what else was happening.”

“I gathered that you were upset.” He brought her over to the bedroom and set her carefully on her feet. “Get undressed.” He kissed her forehead and disappeared into the bathroom and Mary complied without hesitation, pulling her short silk robe around herself before getting into bed. He emerged a few minutes later carrying the white enamel bowl and a smaller bowl with a thick green paste in in it. Mary lay on her side and lifted her robe to the waist, revealing the scratches.

“They're not as red as yesterday.” She said softly.

“So I see.” He turned her slightly and pushed the robe off of her shoulder. Mary took the hint and slid out of it, even though she kept herself covered as much as possible. “Are you still using that other ointment?”

“No.” She had started out using an antibiotic cream but found his green paste that smelled like spicy grass clippings worked much better. He used a small basting brush to apply a thick layer to the scratches. She winced as the treatment stared to burn. “There didn't seem to be a need.”

“As I said.” He smiled a bit as he said it.

“How did you know it would work so well anyway?” He sat down and Mary pillowed her head against his thigh. His fingers moved through her hair and Mary shivered pleasantly.

“Because I have used it before, with one of your ancestors.”

“Which one?” Mary still hadn't investigated the family history as much as she should have, but if she didn't ask something he would ask her what was wrong.

“John Beeson. He had been out hunting and was struck with an arrow. In those times any injury was serious, but he was struck in the meat of his arm and wound seemed minor. Within several days though the wound acquired a foul stench that left no doubt that all of the remedies and prayers were not working. I spoke to his father of this remedy and since there was little hope of anything else working I was allowed to try. All were surprised that it worked so well.”

“I thought you were a warrior.” Mary's body was relaxed and burning sting had subsided. She closed her eyes and drew a deep breath. He laughed softly.

“I am, but it is useful for one who fights to know how to heal himself, and his comrades.” His talons lightly stroked her back. “That is not to say that what is healing for our kind is always healing for yours, but there are overlaps.” He lifted her head and Mary moved so he could stand. Aiden carefully washed the ointment from her skin and Mary turned. He began treating the other side. “So what upset you so today?”

“Mr. and Mrs. March want to leave.” She drew in a sharp breath and closed her eyes as the burning spread through her other hip.

“Ambrose told me when he hired them. Do they wish to move to another position, or end work entirely?” The wounds on this side were deeper and the treatment was more uncomfortable. Mary shivered a bit, but Aiden continued until each scratch was covered.

“No, Mrs. March said she thinks Mr. March is ill, because he's seeing things.” Mary tried to be vague and hoped that he would just accept that with no further explaination.

“What is he seeing?” He helped her sit up a little and rest against his side. Mary was silent until he lifted her chin.

“You.” She said softly. “I guess we haven't been as careful as I thought. Anyway, Mrs. March thinks that he's hallucinating and she wants to move to London where he can be under the care of psychiatrist.”

“A what?” He was looking at her curiously.

“Sorry, a doctor that specializes in the treatment mental illnesses.”

“Ah.” He held her silently for a few minutes. “Do you trust them?”

“Of course. I can't imagine being here without them, much less how I'm going to find someone else to take over their jobs. Maggie hinted that she would make a good housekeeper, but I don't think I could stand having her around any more than she is.”

“Have you considered telling them?” Mary looked up, surprised to see that he was being perfectly serious. She didn't know how to respond. “We were not always secrets you know. I do not know how knowledge of our kind was so thoroughly squelched, but our kind lived openly with yours. I know the world has changed, but if you can trust these two, I see no reason to keep the secret from them.”

“I was wondering how I would keep the other a secret, if I managed to wake her that is.” Mary was still not certain what the conversation would sound like, but the idea made sense.

“I have no doubt that you will wake the other.” He stroked her face softly and smiled into her eyes. Mary blushed and snuggled against him. “Consider it, child.” He kissed her lightly and then reached for the cloth again.