Alisha

I know I don’t know Arlen very well but he’s an interesting guy, and he can provide for me. I know it may sound selfish but right now I need someone to take care of me, platonically though. We had a date tonight as per Arlen’s request; lately I have been finding I’m more of a toy to Arlen then anything, something … or someone rather he can order around. He usually comes over every night or so, it starts off all innocent but then he starts to force himself on me. Nothing has happened yet because luckily I have been able to distract him, but I feared it wouldn’t hold out much longer. He was showing his true colors. Last night Arlen made the mistake of leaving one of his paper bags full of icing sugar on my kitchen table.

I decided to bake some cupcakes and use the icing sugar to make some icing for my cupcakes. I wanted to surprise him, hoping that maybe it would soften him and I could avoid the inevitable. So I started baking away, once I had made all my cupcakes and were waiting for them to cool I started to prepare supper for tonight. I was making his favorite lemon chicken and rice, yet another one of my efforts of prolonging any time of attempt of physical contact.

The door bell rang just as I was smearing the last bit of icing on the cupcake. I went to answer the door and it was Arlen, but instead of all smiles he had a much panicked look on his face. He rushed in and started frantically throwing things around. I know it’s very hard to make this place look any worse then it already is but somehow by him throwing all my possessions around, he succeeded.

“Arlen, please. If you need to find something I would appreciate it if you would just ask me.” I instructed. He stopped and looked at me, still had a look of panic on his face but this time there was a little anger there as well.

“I left a paper bag here last night, I need it” he ordered in a rather impatient tone. I shook my head, “it’s gone.” I replied. He looked at me with such fury it frightened me so I back off a little.

“GONE!” he screamed, “What the HELL do you mean it’s GONE!?” he continued to holler. I winced and jumped at his words, or should I say ranting.

“Arlen what is the matter, it was just icing sugar. If you want I’ll go buy some more at the store, I made icing out of it, look…” I walked over to the chocolate cupcakes and pointed at the nicely smeared icing on the tops of each one. His jaw just dropped. “I made desert for tonight, I wanted to surprise you and—“he cut me off.

“You stupid little fucking CUNT!” he bellowed at me. I started to back up towards the door and he caught on to my plan and ran for it, I screamed when he ran towards me. At first I didn’t know what he was going to do. He grabbed me and threw me on my dirty, worn-out couch; he threw me so hard my side scrapped up against a spring that emerged from one of the cushions. I winced in pain and looked down to see blood staining the cushion. I guess it was more then just a scrape, I thought. I kept telling myself things like “try to stay cool” and “it will be over soon, think of the baby…” I closed my eyes tight trying to envision Devon. Oh how I missed him right about now, remembering our first kiss, our first love making… and how stupid I was to give all that up.

“You look at me right now you bitch!” I felt a blow to my face. At first I imagined it must have been a dream, but then I tasted the salty, bitterness of my blood. Panic struck through my mind, I immediately curled up in a ball to protect my stomach. I guess that’s maternal instinct for you. I started to sob and pressed my hand up against my cheek, I guess an attempt to protect from being punched again.

“I SAID LOOK AT ME!” He shouted. I did as I was told and looked him straight in the eyes. He straightened his posture, satisfied that he managed to gain so much control over me. It was embarrassing. I didn’t deserve this, I was a good person. If there was a God, I hate him now more then ever.

Arlen started to walk towards me, and began to unzip his jeans. “Oh God” I thought, “he’s going to rape me!” once again panic ran through my mind, I began to look around for exits. But I knew it was hopeless, he was so strong and I was so weak, and there was only so much I could do before I was risking getting a blow to my stomach and losing Devon’s baby. I sobbed so hard, my shoulders shaking rapidly, I felt so alone, so out of control. How do I always manage to get myself into situations like this? I thought. Arlen finally reached me and lingered above me like the Grim Reaper. I kept following his gaze in fear that if I broke our stare he would surely punch me again.

“Suck it,” he ordered. Obviously I didn’t reach fast enough because I received a hard slap against the face. “Oww,” I moaned in pain. Tears started flooding my eyes faster then ever before. He glared hard down at me because I still wasn’t doing anything.

“Unless you want that pretty little face messed up even more I suggest you do as you are told.” He concluded. I quickly got on my hands and knees and did as I was told. After I satisfied his order he grabbed me hard on the shoulders, spun me around and began to cut my clothes off with his pocket knife. Of course I fought some but that only resulted in more blows so eventually I just surrendered to his power, I cried the whole time.

“Yeah that’s right bitch, cry. I’m only going to fuck you harder and longer” he threatened. I tried to choke back my tears but it was so difficult when all I could think about was being rescued. I wanted to run away again, I wanted to run away from my problems.

“Why are you doing this Arlen…”I meekly asked. I wasn’t expecting him to answer; in fact I wasn’t expecting that to come out, it just sort of flew out, like word vomit. I suddenly feared for my life. I knew all speaking would do was result in more beatings, but to my surprise he answered me.

“You really want to know why bitch? I’ll tell you why” as he fucked me harder with his growing rage, “that ‘icing sugar’ you made? Well that was about $15,000 in cocaine which I now owe to a huge mobster, and I will be repaid by you! You are going to work off you debt, but not with me” he continued as he pounded my poor vagina harder, “Ohh no, your not getting off that easy. You will be my top girl. You are going to the big guys and thank your lucky stars your attractive enough to pay off your debt!” He concluded.

I kept quiet after that, I actually wished I didn’t know what I know now. How was I supposed to know it was cocaine!? I winced in pain as he continued raping me. More thoughts poured in, but I didn’t care, I actually welcomed them, anything was better then being on this planet right here – right now. I thought of things like what did he mean I was going to the big guys? What work would I have to do to pay off this debt? What kind of business is he running? Why is he doing business with Mobs? I continued to trail off in my own little world when he came. I was ever so grateful that this experience was over…for now anyway.

Afterwards, when he was done “punishing” me I just lay there staring at the roof, silent tears dripped down my cheeks and under my chin then proceeding to run down my neck. He had left immediately after he climaxed, muttering something about having to come up with that fifteen grand by midnight. I didn’t care about that. I couldn’t. All I could think about was “How am I going to get myself out of this?” better yet, “How did I get myself into this?” I felt like a cheap whore. No bigger then a cockroach. I hated my life. I hated Devon for doing this to me; I bet he’s just sitting at home relaxing or worse…with another girl! Suddenly I became very jealous, and angry, and resentful. How could Devon do this to me? How could he just forget he got me pregnant? How could he not care if I got an abortion!? Oh how my veins throbbed. I wasn’t sure if it was because I was so furious, or because of what I just went through.

But I would get my revenge, I vowed. But first thing is first, I need to figure out how to escape from his control. I wouldn’t allow myself to be Arlen’s sex slave. I’m bigger then that, then him, then everyone. I will get even, I promised. You’ll see…you’ll all see.


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