Tutor and Brother

7. Waiting

Evening had come, after a day in which Ced had felt slightly disappointed. His brother had avoided him diligently, no trace of him in the house or on the premises as he’d looked for him. All he’d left was a brief note, with his flourished signature, resembling a grin, telling him about the wonderful evening he intended to prepare for them, and bidding Ced to wait him where he liked most to find him. He’d sighed knowing he would comply, without any but, or fuss about this careful avoidance today.
Ced felt like drowning in a maze of fluid heat, that enveloped him, threatened to conquer each part of his body, of his very soul. The man who’d changed everything for him was his own brother. Starring sightlessly in front of him, a whispered moan escaped his reddened lips. It had been a week of bliss, of unadulterated passion with his brother leading the wildest and sensuous games. Soon, he’d discovered surprised that his brother’s voice whispering heatedly in his year while embracing him and gripping his engorged shaft into his hand, making him find unexpected release, or denying it till the brink of madness was almost as tortuously beautiful as the sensual whippings, David administered as tenderly as making love. And he, Cedric, no longer felt humiliated, scared and isolated in his world that had started as their tutor’s making. David had changed together with him, in order to be with him, to embrace him and what he was, and for the first time he didn’t feel fear of being abandoned in a wild and dangerous world. He’d have his particular world created by his own brother. His brother, the careless youth who had changed abruptly into a controlling man, a demanding and possessive one. A dreamy smile swept over his face. Imagine this…once his secret with William had been discovered, life had taken another turn so fast that he almost lost track of anything, but the new and diverse manners in which he was used, and loved, and pleasured. The best was that he felt secure and enjoyed the attention and care and love of his brother. Of this he was certain. Inaudibly he whispered to the empty room “oh, David, you could never hurt me like William, you made me scream, but now I understand…you did it, and yet I was not as hurt as I’d thought…you held me and healed me in the next instant. I am yours whether I like it or not, or if I wish to remain faithful and true to William or not’. His thoughts again halted at this. William, the man who’d showed him the dark-light side of love. He’d learned to appreciate all the whippings and punishments William so diligently meted, hardly expecting for the moment when release was granted. Before his eyes a superimposed image started to float. The face was a strange combination of David and William, features melting into one another, as he just considered his plight and bliss. He would be the one to bear the brunt of their displeasure. He would be the one having to thread on the thin line between the two possessive men. And, he could tell right now, that the two were going to fight each other in the dark and overtly, whenever they got a chance at it. Stirring one, meant from now on inciting the other as well…his brows went into a speculative frown. Indeed, he was in the middle, and only by playing his cards right, even in submission he would be the one to make a choice in the end…whenever that end would come. He would submit to them both, pleasure them both knowing he gained the same pleasure in exchange. He would try to watch them when they laid spent whispering nothings to him, comforting him after very hard sessions, and learn all he could. He needed to learn as much as possible about his own wishes. He had to know about his threshold of pain and lust, of when to say yes, or no, and teach them in the processes to accept his limits, and his personality. He liked to be subjected to pain for gaining lust. He was not so sure about the humiliation, though. And David had shown him, there could be a lot of lust, without feeling so diminished and patronized as William had done. Palms flat on the cold sheet, eyes fixed in the ceiling, in his mind the molten image of David and Cedric floating in a blurred image of the two, Cedric’s blood started to boil, icy trickling in his veins as he waited, waited, naked, outstretched for his newest lord and master who’d promised to make unique their last night together for a long time to come. He could almost feel the cold, stinging touch of the whip as it kissed his shoulders, or perhaps it will be only the cane, or the birch on his shapely and well-rounded buttocks. He could picture that desperate, hot moment when balancing on the edge between sanity and sheer crazed desperation his brother will perhaps take him, ruthlessly, possessively, making him cry-out and try wriggle free at the same time as he’d force himself to take as much of his brother as possible. His body was by now shivering with the whirls of expectation carried by blood, humming in his ears. He never noticed that he’d closed his eyes, less that he was gliding into the arms of an unreal mixture of sleep and desire-filled imaginings while all the same his last thought was: yet David didn’t…

David had awakened in a particularly good mood, and after his morning bath and breakfasting alone, he’d decided to look into his brother’s room. He’d opened the door silently, just in case he slept not to awake him, and seeing the beautiful man on the bed, on his side, a leg slightly bent, a fist clutching the sheet, the other hand under his head, from midriff down tangled in the other sheet, he silently retreated again. In fact, he was quite glad, actually, that his brother was yet asleep. He had a lot of things to do, secretly, and this was a good opportunity. But first, he’d go for a ride on his favorite horse. Yes, Thunder needed his exercise, just as he needed to breathe fresh air and shake loose the enthralled feeling hunting him after the sultry night spent with his brother.
He rode towards the lake. It was one of the nicest places on their land, one of his most treasured secrets being the small gazebo erected on a small island in the middle of the lake. After he tethered Thunder, whispering soft praises to the horse and giving him as morsel a bit of carrot he took the boat and went to the island. As he started the few marbled stairs to the gazebo that was covered lovingly in rose-bushes and ivy, so that prying eyes could see nothing from the goings-on inside the gazebo, he suddenly had the most exciting image of his brother with him in this place on a lush summer afternoon and night, candles in the gazebo, carelessly thrown pillows on its floors, and the two of them wrapped in their game of love and passion. Here, there would be no eyes to pry on them, no ears to hear in the night, and lots of time to enjoy each other leisurely. Yes, definitely, the gazebo had a potential when sunny days…sunny days…he harrumphed, realizing that it was pure gamble. The gazebo would be just one of the future’s projects, and he could see himself watching the sun licking his brother’s skin, or the moon making it whiter and even more tempting in the flickering candle-light while all the time his hands were following the fingers of either sun or moon, feeling the hot skin, the welts’ traces, or the traces of their own mingled sweat.
Of much greater importance was his other plan. A house, just for the two of them, where they could share in peace all desires, again safe from inquiring eyes and wagging tongues. He already knew the place. It was the old, deserted house, of a former tenant who’d tended the gardens. The house had been left in disrepair but it was just the thing. In that house they would be as undisturbed as in the gazebo. Away from William during these two years, away from William’s spies, as he didn’t doubt for a second that someone from the staff, even if devoted to him and his brother, still informed William about them, and about each of their steps. It was unavoidable. William had been already for such a long time with them that he was regarded, more or less, as a family member by most, and held in great respect. Yet, he couldn’t bear to think of himself and Ced being in William’s proximity when being allowed to share time alone together. He felt need of more privacy, of distancing himself from what the castle had started meaning in the last week or so.
He would reclaim it again for him and his brother, but not before William left. Till then, he wanted, no needed, to share moments with his brother anywhere but…but in the chambers brought unwittingly alive to their initial use by William and Ced. He would have to do something about them. The pensive frown on his face deepened. He knew what he’d do. He’d seal the damned chambers for eternity, making sure no other successor of his or, maybe even one of Ced’s, would ever find it again, or be used as Ced had been. He’d guessed right last night. William had been more a hard taskmaster and demanding owner than lover to his brother. Granted, his brother had accepted all that’d been done to him by William, not knowing better. In fact, he, David, barely knew better, but he was willing to learn and do it right for his brother’s and his own sake. He thought that he will even throw away all toys and implements of those rooms. He’d used some of them in this week of unexpected grace, and he’ll still use them…but just for a little while, till he could make the necessary arrangements and purchase his own for him and Ced. Yes, this was his order of business. First, arrange safe havens for him and Ced and purchase the necessary things. Hell, he would have to make bloody lists for all he needed, and yet other lists for materials, and get workers do the job in great secret. Well, he could say that the job would be cut for him in the next months, all the time being careful not to be discovered by William or, heaven forbid, one of his minions, or even worse, be exposed by someone else and landing himself and Ced in the mills of gossip. The ton had anyway this spleeny feeling, tittering for any type of titillation.
He cracked angrily the riding crop on his boot. He hated what William had done to them and to the castle, and yet felt also a sort of gratitude. He felt deep in his soul that without William’s intervention there would have been the danger of running dissatisfied through his whole life, not knowing what was lacking in his life. Or would have been there any other ways of discovering it? Could he have found the answers to the troubling questions that had bewildered him, and Ced alike, being guilty for their estrangement even without William’s ‘contribution’? Was there a chance that they would have discovered this strange attraction they shared also without William, could they have, well, managed it properly, without their tutor? He harrumphed dissatisfied. He had to give William his due. William had shown them the truth, whether he liked it or not.

It was to be their last evening together, before William’s arrival. It was for the first time when Ced didn’t look forward to the moment when William would open the door and enter into the room. He sensed that David was even more annoyed waiting for William’s arrival. These few days spent enjoying freedom and togetherness had almost become a pattern. He didn’t need to look at David to know that he thought just the same. They’d slept, made love and played together. Each of them being free to ask, to give and take, what he wanted from the other…a dreamy smile fled over Ced’s lips. Last night David had been at the receiving end. He’d had his brother tied and had used on him the French whip. It had been exquisitely charming to watch him, amongst piles of pillows, lying on his belly, buttocks bucking against the whip, hands gripping tightly the knots, breath halting when he felt caressing hands running down the spine to his aching buttocks, then separating them and reaching to that intimate place inside. He’d given a suppressed shout of lust when fingers started forcing themselves inside him, retreating to just enter more. His eyes focused suddenly on his brother who watched him grinning almost tenderly. He returned the smile just as a concerned frown starting marring his beautiful features.
“I…I’m afraid of William’s arrival in but few hours David. I don’t know, but I have the definite feeling he is going to be a terrible sight to behold. It took him longer than expected to come…He’d left us unsupervised for almost two weeks now. He will be spiteful, vengeful and…’, his voice trailed away.
“Lusting.” David had finished the sentence in but one word. “I know. But you and I needn’t worry right now. We’ll have opportunity aplenty when we see what he’ll have in store for us. Finally, we know he’s not going to kill us, don’t we?” He tried to grin again but the mood was gone.

David let his eyes roam over the nicely displayed body of his brother. Why did he have to bring up William right now?
Ced felt the shift of mood, the complex mingle of jealousy and possessiveness running havoc through the mind and body of his brother. He shifted and changed his outstretched position to kneeling on the bed, bowed his head, and took gently his brother in his mouth. David’s hands turned to fists, head thrown back as his breathing became labored. Soon the two of them were hissing and breathing harshly, lustful sighs prompting the other to more daringly arousing touches and gestures. As they collapsed exhausted and embraced on the bed, the single thought in both their minds was William. It simply haunted them, making their hearts beat faster, and hands and bodies to intertwine closer. Both afraid, both expecting, hoping, shivering and anticipating. Anticipation, concluded David before delivering himself to sleep, was the damnedest of it.