Moonlight Denial: Shades of Moonlight Book One

Hey guys! I am sooooo sorry that this is so late. You have no idea how sorry I am. Life has recently just gotten away from me and the hecticness I’ve found myself in (Plus just a small dose of writers block) has left me little room to sit down and actually focus on writing. I’m gonna try my best not to leave you guys like that again for so long, but I honestly can’t make any promises, but just know I’m gonna give it my all! So enough of my jibber-jabbering, I know you guys want the chapter you’ve been denied of for so long and her is the link to my replies to the wonderful reviews I received for the last chapter. I love you all and thanks for your patience!

Link to Replies: http://darkness80.livejournal.com/2782.html

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Nicoli took a sharp intake of breath as his eyes snapped open. He had to blink repeatedly as his vision tried to focus on his surroundings. Soon his ceiling came into view and for a moment he was unsure of what had happened.

Then everything came back. The memories. The pain. The betrayal. It all hit him at once and he felt completely sickened by them. As he became aware of his own body he realized how cold he was and that helped put his sickness in the back of his mind. He felt like a block of ice and that even his blood had been frozen. His body also felt extremely heavy. He groaned as he tried to sit up, but the action made it feel like a thousand tiny icicles raced through his veins.

“Don’t move,” a voice said.

He glanced to his side to see Felix sitting on the bed beside him.

“What’s wrong with me?” Nicoli asked weakly.

“Besides the usual, nothing much,” Felix said with a grin. He picked up the blanket that had bunched around the end of the bed and pulled it over Nicoli. “You just have to let your body readjust. You’ve been exposed to me for a bit long.”

“Exposed…to you?”

“Yeah, while you couldn’t feel my cold in the memories, you were being affected by it out here since we were connected for some time. That’s why it’s dangerous for humans to be in contact with ghosts for so long. They fall in danger of freezing to death. Luckily we weren’t like that for too long.”

Nicoli sighed as the warmth of the blanket brought feeling back to his fingertips.

“It felt like we were in there for hours,” he murmured.

“I know, but really it’s only been a few minutes. I would have pulled out if it was getting to be too much.” Felix snorted and smirked. “Can’t have your parents finding a frozen Meatbag in the morning.”

“Har har, very funny.” Nicoli let out a squeak when a giant golden beast jumped up onto the bed and his face was attacked with a wet, rough tongue. “Ow, ugh, Beethoven, stop it. Lay down.”

All breath left him when Beethoven plopped down on top of him, nearly crushing his ribs and making his icy body jolt in a most uncomfortable way.

“Nnngh, good boy,” he wheezed. “How long am I going to be like this?”

“Just relax. You’ll thaw out in a few minutes,” Felix said, leaning back on his hands.

Felix was right, soon enough feeling returned to Nicoli’s body, with the help from Beethoven’s added body heat. Soon he was able to move and sit up, after pushing Beethoven off.

“You never mentioned side-effects,” he mumbled once he was fully up.

“Oh, quit your whining, you’re fine.”

“Still, a little warning would have been nice.” Nicoli pet Beethoven’s head, who had settled to lie in his lap. Silence fell after that and the two sat on the bed, unsure of what to do next. “Well, this is awkward.”

“Yeah, I know, right? Well, you saw everything about the clan. All the death and carnage and tragedy…any questions?”

“Um…” Nicoli thought, but he was so overwhelmed by everything that he saw, everything that he felt. He shook his head. “I just can’t believe everything the clan went through. It was so horrible and yet they all are still functioning with the will to go on.” He was reminded of Ethan almost taking his life and immediately pushed the thought away.

“They’re a tough bunch, that’s for sure,” Felix agreed.

“After seeing what happened to them it makes what I went through with Dimitri seem like nothing.” Nicoli’s hand rested on his shoulder, lightly touching his back where his scars laid hidden.

“I’m sure that’s not true. I don’t know what happened, but from how we found you I’m sure no one would think what happened to you would be a cakewalk.”

“Yeah…I guess.” Nicoli was reminded of how Ethan had told him how brave he was and that even Conrad had commended him too…Conrad. “Wait, you didn’t show me everything,” he said, a memory sparking along his brain.

“Oh? And what did I miss, oh knowledgeable one?”

“You said there was an event that would make Conrad never want the clan to be close to humans again like they were with you. Something you blamed yourself for. You never showed it to me.”

“But I did.”

“Huh?” Now Nicoli was just confused and showed it by staring at Felix strangely with his head tilted.

“You are dense, aren’t you?” Felix taunted with a shake of his head. “What hit Conrad so hard and made him dislike humans even more, was Ethan’s suicide attempt. After Conrad found out about it he never wanted the clan to get close to humans again unless they were going to change that human quickly afterwards.”

Nicoli’s mouth fell open and all he could do was blink at Felix. When he was finally able to close it his brows creased, showing his displeasure.

“That’s his reason? That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.”

“What?”

“Ethan wasn’t trying to kill himself just because of what happened to you. It was a whole mixture of things. Your death, Aria and Stephen’s deaths, and majorly because of Meier’s betrayal. How could Conrad single out your relationship with Ethan as the cause of the suicide attempt? And how can you blame yourself for his moronic decision in damning human, vampire involvement?” Nicoli demanded. He just couldn’t see it. It utterly confused him. He wished he could understand how Conrad’s brain worked, just once.

Felix turned his head away and his fingers tightly gripped the side of the bed.

“Because it’s true. After what happened to me his concerns were made crystal clear.” His jaw clenched and his eyes misted over. “Humans are weak, pathetic creatures when compared to vampires. They’re fragile and die far too easily.” A single tear rolled down his cheek. “When Meier attacked me, when he was torturing me, there was nothing I could do. I tried to defend myself, but my efforts were nothing against him. He could do whatever he wanted to me, he did whatever he wanted, and I couldn’t stop him. He was too strong and I was reduced to nothing but his plaything.”

Felix rubbed at his eyes with his arm, discarding the evidence of his tears.

“Because of my weakness Ethan got hurt. Meier used me to hurt Ethan in the worst way possible and it worked. That is why it is dangerous for vampires to care for humans. Our human lives are delicate and can easily be taken away.” Felix fixed Nicoli with a stare that held nothing but foreboding and pain. “That is why Conrad is so nervous about having you with us and why I was against it too. No matter how much Ethan denies it he has grown close to you and I’m sure Meier and the others have noticed that. If something happens to you it could hurt Ethan all over again…and no one is certain of what he would do if he suffered like that again.”

A great lump had grown in Nicoli’s throat. No matter how many times he swallowed it wouldn’t go down. It made a certain kind of sense to him. Dimitri had already proven that he wasn’t above using a human to get what he wanted and Nicoli had been too weak comparatively to do anything but keep his mouth sealed and rear his stubborn head. In fact, Nicoli had felt that he was a weakling since the beginning. He had no idea why Ethan wanted his help when there was nothing he could really do to protect himself or others. Something about what Felix had said, however, sat uncomfortably in his stomach, twisting and writhing. It was something Nicoli didn’t agree with and wouldn’t absorb.

“It’s still stupid.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m sorry, but it’s stupid to blame you for what happened. You loved Ethan, how can you be at fault for that? And Conrad is just stupid for making you feel that way in the first place. Yes, humans are weak. I’m reminded of that every second of every day, but I don’t care. To blame all humanity and thinking vampires should keep humans at arms length at all times is just stupid, stupid, stupid.” Nicoli’s fingers stroked down Beethoven’s head and neck repeatedly as he spoke, feeling the fur slip through the ever-moving digits.

“There are so many other ways to get hurt and not all of them are because of humans. Like I said, Meier betrayed Ethan and even if he hadn’t killed you it still would have devastated Ethan completely. Then look at Cora. She was in love with Stephen, who was a vampire, and she was crushed when he died. That’s another thing. Sure, humans can die easier, but vampires can die too. Meier used Aria and Stephen’s deaths to hurt the clan just as much as he used yours, so Conrad focusing the blame on humans is totally unjust…what?”

Felix was giving him a funny look and Nicoli’s skin prickled at the stare. He wished he could do something to get those eyes off him, but that happened soon enough when Felix turned his head and laughed.

“You’re a funny one, you know that? The stuff that comes out of your mouth.”

“What? It’s all true.” Nicoli leaned down to rest his chin on top of Beethoven’s head. “At least it makes sense to me. If you want to keep blaming yourself for Ethan almost becoming a crispy vamp, go ahead. I’m sure I can’t change your mind or Conrad’s, but I refuse to follow that same train of thought.”

“It’s America, you’re free to do what you want,” Felix said, his shoulders bobbing in a shrug. Felix slipped from the bed and floated in front of Nicoli. It was odd to see him do so since his feet had been firmly planted on the ground the entire time they were in the memories. “As for me, I’m a ghost. We’re good at the whole “Blaming ourselves for what we’ve done in our lives” thing. Comes with the territory, in my opinion.”

“Hey, Felix,” Nicoli said, lifting his head. “Do you know why you came back? As a ghost, I mean. Did it just happen or did you choose to do it? Do most people come back as ghosts?” He couldn’t help but think of the family members who had passed away as he grew up, especially his grandmother. He wished beyond anything that she was in some kind of peaceful afterlife, whether that was heaven or something akin to it. He didn’t want to think of her as some lonely spirit that clung to the earth, unable to move on.

“I’m not quite sure,” Felix said thoughtfully. “It’s not like as I was dying I was thinking, “I’m so going to come back and haunt this asshole.” It all just kind of…happened. It could have been because of the violent way I died or that I just wanted to warn the others of the danger right underneath their noses. There are more ghosts around than people realize and we all have our reasons for staying. Whether it’s because we want revenge, or we want to make up for something we did, or just because we’re scared of the afterlife that’s waiting for us. No one knows what’s on the other side until we go and if we do then there’s no coming back from it. It’s the final point of no return.”

Nicoli nodded in understanding, but as soon as that question was answered another one bubbled up in his throat, begging to be released.

“Are you ever going to, you know, move on someday?”

Felix didn’t answer right away. He stared off into a corner of the room in thought, thinking of how best to reply. He then sighed as he lay in the air on his back and tucked his hands behind his head.

“Honestly, I would like to. On really bad days I’d like nothing more than to leave all of this behind and go into the afterlife, whether its heaven or hell that’s waiting for me. The simple fact of the matter is that I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t? Don’t you mean you won’t?”

“It’s both, actually.” Felix looked around, as if making sure no one was eavesdropping on them, before floating back down to the ground to stand in front of Nicoli. “What I’m about to say is never to be repeated, okay? Not to anyone, especially not Ethan. Promise?”

“Uh, yeah, I promise,” Nicoli swore, wondering what had to be kept so secret.

Felix sighed and glanced about the room again.

“I can’t move on because…because of Ethan.”

“Ethan?”

“Yes, Ethan. I just can’t even fathom leaving when I know how painful all of this is for him and knowing that he’s going to have to face a lot more before all off this is over. You saw what he almost did and no matter what you say part of why he almost took his own life is because of me.” Felix began to pace as his voice grew more heated and agitated. “What happens if I leave and something else happens to completely devastate him? What if he tries to kill himself again?”

“I’m sure Ethan would never –”

“No one thought he would try the first time!” Felix exclaimed. “What happens if I move on and he tries again? I won’t be there to save him a second time. I-I just can’t leave with that hanging over my head. I can’t leave with all of this still going on. I already know that for a fact.”

“How?” was all Nicoli was able to ask in the face of Felix’s words.

Felix covered his face with his hand and then that same hand slipped through his hair.

“Because I already tried.”

Nicoli’s mouth fell open at the confession and even Beethoven was eerily still, his tail not even twitching.

“You-You’ve tried to move on before?” Nicoli asked softly.

“Yes, I did a few years ago. It was during just one of those impossibly hard days when I was tired of everything and I wanted it to end. I just wanted to know what real peace was and I knew the only way I could get that was to move on. So I tried and nothing happened.” Felix faced Nicoli again and he looked so pained and broken. “There is no light for me to go into. There’s no tunnel for me to follow that has pearly white gates at the end. I’m stuck here. I’m stuck like this.” He gestured to his intangible form. “And I know why too. That was made clear to me the day I tried to move on.”

“Why?”

“It’s because of Ethan. Ethan is my unfinished business. Like I said, I just can’t go with the fear of not knowing what’s going to happen to him. I can never be at peace until I know that he is safe and that he’s happy. If that means I have to wait until all of this stupid Heart bullshit is over then so be it…though a part of me also thinks that in order for me to move on I have to know that he can love again.”

That statement sounded peculiar to Nicoli. Ethan being unable to love just sounded all sorts of wrong.

“What do you mean?” Nicoli asked. “Ethan seems to love a lot of people. You, Andre, Conrad–”

“I don’t mean just loving his family or friends,” Felix interrupted. “I mean I can’t go unless I know he has the ability to fall in love again. Be in love with someone like he was with me. After I died he hardly wanted any contact with anyone, not even the clan, because he felt like he was doing some kind of great injustice to me. Like I said it was me that really had to push Ethan into being close to people again. Touching, kissing, sex, it took him a great while to do any of that again and while he’s better in that aspect now, I’m quite sure he’s still resistant in ever letting himself love someone completely again.”

Nicoli quietly reflected on Felix’s words. It was a sad thought that Ethan would keep himself from falling in love, though the concept of mushy, Hollywood True Love went right over Nicoli’s head. He had never been in love. He had cared for the people he had had relationships with and had even uttered the phrase, “I love you,” but he had never actually been in love. With out that experience he didn’t know what it meant to deny oneself such a feeling.

“So, you think he’ll ever get over that?” Nicoli asked.

“I want him to. I’ve told him a thousand times if he finds someone new he should go after them with his whole heart. Doesn’t mean I like the thought any, but it’s what’s best for him,” Felix added in a mutter before rubbing the bridge of his nose. “I know my being here isn’t helping him any. He holds himself back because he’s afraid of hurting me. It would be easier on him if I just moved on, but I can’t. I can’t until I know he’s moved on first and he probably won’t move on until I move on. It’s a vicious, vicious cycle.”

“God, tell me about it,” Nicoli said, absently petting Beethoven’s head. All he could think about was how horrible it would be to be caught in that kind of situation. He didn’t know if he could handle it.

“I just wish he could find someone that I was certain would take care of him when I’m gone, or at least just made him happy.” Felix threw up his hands as he let out a grunt. “God, I’d probably be okay if he fell for you.”

“Whoa!” Nicoli exclaimed. “No, no, no, no, no. No way in hell. I’m just sleeping with the guy. There’s no falling of any kind going on here.”

“Down, Mr. Defensive, I was just making a point.”

“Well, point that somewhere else,” Nicoli grumbled. He let out a breath, trying to calm down. The comment shouldn’t have flustered him so, but it did all the same. “So, you really don’t have a problem if Ethan and I continue to sleep together?” he asked, trying to change the subject to just physical aspects.

Felix shrugged.

“What business is it of mine? I gave Ethan free reign to do what he wanted with anyone he wanted, so I have no say.”

“…It’s killing you on the inside, isn’t it?”

“Completely, but that’s all part of letting go and I’m serious about trying to have Ethan move on.” Felix laced his fingers together and reached his arms above his head to stretch them. If he had joints and bones a few would have popped. “Well, I’m out of here.”

“You’re leaving?” Nicoli asked in surprise.

“Yeah, I showed you what I wanted to show you and now I’m exhausted, so I’m going to go rest up a bit. Plus I can’t leave Ethan worrying forever.” Felix started to drift towards the window, but stopped in mid flight, returning to face Nicoli.

“Oh, one more thing.” A familiar scowl over took his features as he gazed upon the other. “Don’t you ever tell Ethan what I said about him being my unfinished business. It would kill him if he knew I can’t move on because of him. He’s already dealing with enough guilt about all the circumstances. He doesn’t need more. And if you do happen to tell him I will kill you, do you understand?”

A chill ran down Nicoli’s spine because he knew that Felix was being completely serious.

“Uh, yeah. My lips are sealed,” he said.

“Your mind better be too,” Felix said lowly. “See you later.”

“Wait,” Nicoli said, pushing Beethoven off him and getting to his feet. Felix stopped right at the window.

“What, Meatbag?” he asked, his back still turned to Nicoli.

“Er, look, I know we’ve been more than unpleasant to each other since we’ve met, but…you’ve shown me so much. I feel like I really know you now.” Nicoli cleared his throat as he rubbed the back of his neck. He had no idea how to get out the thought that was wriggling in his chest. “Is-Is there any possibility that we could, you know, put that all behind us and start fresh? Could we, possibly, even be friends?”

His words sounded so awkward and strange. He wasn’t sure if he had said that even remotely right, but he had to get it out there. After everything he had seen he didn’t know how they could go back to the way things were.

Felix was completely still. Nicoli could see through him to the window and knew that Felix was staring out the glass in thought. Then a word cut through the air.

“No.”

“W-What?”

“No, Nicoli, we can’t be friends,” Felix elaborated.

“Why not?” Nicoli demanded.

Felix finally turned toward Nicoli and his face was set as cold as stone.

“Because I don’t want to be your friend,” he said. His features softened somewhat with what appeared to be sadness. “I never had friends or anyone I could be close to until I met the clan. They were my first friends. My first family. I stripped away all of my doubts and my fears and let myself envelop them whole. Now look what’s happened. The first thing that I ever found precious in my life has been torn to pieces. People are dead, other’s have been wounded beyond repair and one has even betrayed us, betrayed me.”

As Nicoli gazed into Felix’s eyes he saw such raw pain. It hurt to even look at him, but he made himself look on.

“I’ve already committed myself to the clan and know that they may get through this or they may die. I know I won’t handle it well, but I’ll be able to handle it all the same. The reason I don’t want to be your friend is because I don’t want to adjust my thoughts to accommodate the possibility of losing someone else. If I get close to you and something happens and you die…I just don’t want to prepare myself to grieve for that. So, let’s just keep the way things are. Let’s keep bickering and not getting along because I can deal with losing that rather than losing a friend.”

Nicoli swallowed a thick lump in his throat and nodded. Part of him understood and an even smaller part of him agreed. The larger part of him wanted to argue against that, but that same part wanted to do what would make Felix happiest and if it was to deny any sort of friendship between them, then so be it.

“I will ask one favor of you, though,” Felix said.

“What?” Nicoli asked curiously.

“If at some point through all of this you do happen to die, don’t come back. Don’t come back as a ghost like me. I know there’s not much choice for a person, but if you have even the tiniest amount of will, move onto the afterlife. Don’t stay here because I don’t think Ethan could handle having two people haunting him. That would be his breaking point. Besides, this is no way to live.” Felix motioned to himself. “Being this way is almost constant torment. The world is meant for the living, not the dead and I am constantly being reminded of that. Just don’t do this to yourself. If you die just cross over and be free. Don’t make the same mistake I and several others have made and tether yourself to a world that doesn’t want you. That is both a favor and the greatest advice I can give you.”

Nicoli watched in amazement as Felix began to disintegrate starting from his toes.

“And remember, don’t tell Ethan about why I’m still here. I don’t care if you tell anyone of what I’ve shown you of our lives, but never repeat to Ethan what I told you. I’m trusting you with that.”

Then he was gone in a flurry of spectral particles that drifted out the closed window and into the night. Nicoli held out his hand, as if to stop Felix, but it was too late. He stood there, staring out the glass pane. Even though his body was still his mind raced with ceaseless thoughts. All of them were of Felix.

Exhaustion settled over him mixed with a strange dose of hyper awareness. His heavy feet trudged over to the bed. After climbing onto the soft, welcoming mattress he turned off the bedside lamp and lay down. Beethoven curled up against his side, eager to go back to sleep.

Sleep would not come easily to Nicoli, however. He stared at the ceiling, not knowing how to think or feel. He had seen so much in such a short amount of time. Felix’s life was not one for the faint of heart. Random scenes kept flashing before his eyes and he was sure he’d be in for another nightmare when sleep finally took him.

In the midst’s of his thoughts he couldn’t help but think about his rejected offer of friendship. Even though they had just shared something so monumental, Felix wanted nothing to do with him. In the end it would matter little. Nicoli was sure of that. Things would never be the same between them, no matter how hard Felix would try to deny it. Nicoli wouldn’t push it, though. He still wasn’t even sure if he wanted to be friends with Felix, but he felt that was the only logical next step. He would wait until Felix was ready. That was all he really could do.

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Felix materialized within the walls of the clan’s house. It was quiet. He figured everyone must have retired to their rooms since dawn was approaching. A great, aching tiredness overtook him and for the first time in a long while he wished he could sleep. It was such a luxury that all living things took for granted. To slip away into a comfortable kind of nothingness would have been a great relief to him.

He silently drifted up the stairs and entered Ethan’s room. He glided to the side of the bed where Ethan lay curled on his side, lost in sleep. Felix smiled. Ethan always slept on his side. Felix remembered that when they were together he would always go to sleep with Ethan spooning him from behind. To have those protective arms around him and that strong body pressed against his back was the greatest sense of security he had ever had. His smile faded. He had gone without that security blanket for nine years.

He settled himself on the bed beside Ethan. With hardly a thought his hand took on solid form and he began stroking Ethan’s head, making sure to caress the spot between Ethan’s brows with his thumb.

Those same brows creased and Ethan shifted. A light groan passed his lips followed by his eyelids fluttering open. He blinked a few times in confusion before looking up and seeing Felix. A tired smile lit up his face.

“Felix.”

Felix couldn’t help but smile back.

“Hi.”

Ethan closed his eyes again with a look of contentment.

“I was worried.”

“I know. Sorry I was gone for so long.”

Ethan cracked open an eye and Felix was delighted to see the mischievous glint that appeared. Reliving the memory of how broken Ethan had been had hurt him to no end and seeing Ethan now, smiling and happy, relieved him greatly.

“Are you going to tell me where you’ve been?” Ethan asked.

“Nope. Not a chance.”

Ethan laughed.

“I figured as much.” He sat up to Felix’s great displeasure, who had wanted to keep petting his hair. Ethan’s smile was then replaced with concern.

“So are you okay?”

The question surprised Felix and for a wild second he thought that Ethan knew what he had done.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” he asked as calmly as he could.

“I mean after…did you see him? When we went to that place did you see Evan?”

Felix relaxed and berated himself for thinking Ethan was that astute.

“Yeah, I saw him for a split second, but that was it.”

Ethan sighed in what must have been relief.

“Good. I thought you had left because you saw him.” A tight frown pulled down the edges of his mouth. “It must have been hard for you to even look at him.”

Felix thought it over and came to a strange realization.

“No, actually. Seeing him didn’t bother me at all.”

“What? You’re kidding.”

“No, I was really okay. Now that I think about it, I thought I was going to be terrified of seeing him. I was dreading it the moment we set out to save Nicoli. But when I finally saw him…I felt nothing. No anger. No hatred. Nothing.”

Ethan stared at him in silence, obviously not able to take in what he was being told.

“But how is that possible? He murdered you.”

“Yes, I know, Ethan, I was there,” Felix said as he settled his back against the headboard. “I don’t know. Yes, he betrayed and killed me, but I guess I just have other things to worry about. I’m dead and gone. There’s no way to reverse that, so I guess there’s no point in me being angry about it. You guys, on the other hand, are still in danger of sharing my fate. So I guess I’m just more concerned about you and the others, rather than some personal vendetta for myself.”

Ethan shook his head and a shadow of his previous smile returned.

“You are such an amazing person, Felix,” he said. The gloom then descended once more. “I wish Evan had that little of effect on me.”

Felix frowned and ran his fingers through Ethan’s hair. He then traced Ethan’s cheek and jaw before his fingers brushed against lips.

“I wish I knew how to make this all go away. I hate seeing you hurt,” he muttered.

“I wish for that too.” Ethan sighed and cupped Felix’s hand that had returned to his cheek. “I just want all of this to end. I’m so tired, Felix. I’m just so tired.”

Felix leaned forward enough to press his lips to Ethan’s. He then coaxed Ethan to lay back down with his head resting on Felix’s lap.

“Then go to sleep. Sleep and dream of better things and for a few hours you can escape reality.”

Ethan nestled his head comfortably into Felix’s lap and put an arm around slim hips.

“I don’t know how I’d be able to get through any of this without you, Felix. Having you beside me just makes things so much more…bearable. You have no idea how much you mean to me.”

“I know, Ethan. I know. Now go to sleep,” Felix whispered, continuing to stroke golden locks. As Ethan began to drift away he didn’t see the tears that slipped down Felix’s cheeks. The guilt that consumed Felix was boundless. Not a half hour ago he had told Nicoli how much he wanted to finally move on. It was such a selfish desire in the wake of how much he was still needed in the world of the living.

He couldn’t leave Ethan. Not ever. Not with the way things were. So, he would stay bound to the world by Ethan’s side and if that meant he had to sacrifice his afterlife then so be it. He would gladly give it up in a heartbeat if it meant he could be with Ethan. His wonderful, wounded Ethan.

===================================Ch. 68 End

Okay, okay I know this chapter is really short for how long you guys have been waiting, but I have a reason for that. This chapter actually does have more to it, but it was getting to be so long that I just had to break it up. Plus, with what was going to be included it was going to deter from what I see as the wrap up to Felix’s story.

As the final chapter for Felix you now all know why he’s intent on sticking around. It’s because he doesn’t have the ability to move on. He is stuck in the living world and it’s all thanks to Ethan ): Our poor ghost can’t get any peace until he knows Ethan will be okay. You also got to see Nicoli man up and offer his hand in friendship, but that was readily smacked down. Silly, stubborn Felix.

All righty, before I let you go I have a fanart you all must go look at. It is a wonderful picture of Amelia done by the lovely Kasia-chan ^-^ Thanks so much, Buddy! *hugs*

http://devilofdarkness2.deviantart.com/favourites/#/d2svovn

And I also have another discussion open at livejournal. This time it involves music that goes with characters. I hope you like it ^-^

http://darkness80.livejournal.com/2399.html

Well, I hope you guys enjoyed this long awaited chapter, and the next one should come out sooner since I have most of it written out! Until then, take care! *huggies and lickies*