Im Nobody

“Do you need any help with your assignments?” Lilly the substitute asked whilst taking a bite from an apple at her desk. I looked up at her from my multiplication worksheet and shrugged as I traced the character on the top corner of the paper with a pencil. I was stuck in in-school suspension for the last week of school. No field day, no pizza party, and absolutely no fun for this naughty 4th grader. I assume the sub was to suffer with me since I’m the only kid with behavioral issues.

“Sucks having to be stuck with me all day, I know.” She said fake crying into her hands. I rolled my eyes at her as she peeked at me through her fingers and she lifted her arms and sighed loudly before standing up and walking my way.

“It’s the last week of school! Summer vacation!” She hollered with a loud whoop. I tried not to smile at her dramatics but I was a kid I couldn’t help it. She smiled back at me and pulled up a chair sitting across from me. She looked at my empty paper and raised an eyebrow.

“Math is hard… how about this? Today we can draw and tomorrow we do school work? Sounds like fun huh?” She said lifting her brows at me with a grin. I cocked my head at her a bit and nodded in agreement. If it got me out of schoolwork I didn’t care what we did. Lilly got up and pulled some paper and markers from a cabinet and brought them over to the desk. She sat with me and started to draw focused on the art. I followed suit and started drawing with her.

“What are you making?” She asked with her eyes still locked on her paper. I glanced up at her and paused for a second before responding.

“It’s a my own superhero.” I said reaching into the marker bucket and pulling out a red marker.

“What kind of superhero? Does he fly?” She asked peeking at my paper. I covered it with my arm and she quickly looked back to her own paper. I hesitantly started drawing again glance at her a couple times as I did so.

“Yeah he can fly… he beats up mean people with his super strength,” I said with a slight grin.

“Mean people like who? Does he have an arch-nemesis or something?” She asked grabbing a pink marker from the bucket. I looked at her and she looked back at me genuinely interested in my superhero.

“Yeah. He beats up bad guys that hurt people.” I said gripping my marker tightly. She looked at my paper and I didn’t cover it this time as she did so.

“Who got hurt?” She asked while looking down at her drawing. I shrugged and remained silent as the sound of markers squeaking filled the small classroom.

“Was it someone you know?” She asked grabbing another marker from the bucket. I stopped drawing for a moment my eyes glued to the character as she sifted through the bucket looking for a specific color.

“It was nobody,” I said quietly. Lilly paused her drawing and looked at me as I hung my head with my hands in my lap.

“Nobody? Is that their name?” She asked popping the cap off a yellow marker. I shrugged and squeezed the maker in my lap. Nobody is nobody… it’s not a person, place, or thing. It’s not anything.

“What’s your superhero’s name?” She asked. I looked at her as blonde curls cover her face as the looked down at her paper.

“Captain Smile….because when he saves people he does it with a big smile,” I said resuming my work on my drawing. Lilly smiled at my response and placed her markers back in the bin. 

“Okay! I created a masterpiece!” She said holding up her paper and showing me with a big grin. I looked at her drawing and raised an eyebrow at her. “Uh… what is it?” I asked. She looked at me shocked and offended.

“It’s a unicorn! You can’t tell!?” She asked pointing at what I assumed was a horn. I laughed at her and she started laughing as well at her poor attempt at drawing.

“Well let me see yours since you’re the expert here!” She said crossing her arms. I raised my paper and she looked at it with a strange smile.

“Who is that?” She asked pointing to the character on the ground surrounded by a pool of blood.

“That’s the bad guy. Captain Smile killed him.” I said unaware of the concern growing on Lilly’s face. I put my paper down and continued working on my drawing. Lilly sat and watched me and gave me more paper to draw when I asked. Before I knew it the bell rang for lunch and Lilly escorted me to the cafeteria to grab my lunch tray.

“Another teacher will be with you after lunch, I have to substitute for an English lesson.” She said as we walked down the hallway. I kept my head forward as we walked and tried not to show the disappointment on my face at her words. We entered the cafeteria and I stood in line quietly. 

“Mr. Huber is standing right at the entrance. He’ll walk you back to the classroom so don’t dawdle around once you get your lunch, okay?” She said with a smile. I nodded in response and watched as she walked out of the cafeteria stopping to talk to Mr. Huber for a moment. Our eyes met and I quickly looked away. When I looked back she was gone and only Mr.Huber stood at the entrance looking at the bustling cafeteria. 

I grabbed my tray and followed the teacher back to the classroom went back to my desk and froze before sitting down. 

“Is something wrong?” He asked taking a seat at the desk in front of the classroom. I looked back at him and shook my head before sitting down at my empty desk. My appetite was gone and I just looked out the window for the rest of the day watching the trees blow in the wind, and the grades cycle out for recesses.