Turn Around

 

Chapter five    

 

Day five, Monday

 

      

The card on my desk was left unopened while Sem moved around me like a mother hen, making sure I had everything I could possibly need twice over. A pat on the shoulder and a promise that I would contact him if anything happened, and I was alone in my cubicle. The card made me buzz inside and I didn't even know who it was from; the thought just so sweet. I had been given birthday cards and christmas cards but it was neither celebration and for once I was able to enjoy the anticipation as I opened the envelope. The card made me laugh. It was black and white, of a drawn cat hugging a garden gnome with a smile on its face. The inside didn't have a typed greeting but instead there were little sentences and signatures all over, from people I barely knew and who barely knew me. Kind words and welcomes were all over the card and I smiled as I set it up, right by my monitor, giving it a prime spot. When I peeked over the top of my cubicle, more than ten heads quickly turned down and away and I couldn't stop myself from laughing. Maybe this was going to be a better place than home. The people were surely nicer, proven by the card.





I waited. I hung on. I prolonged it as long as possible. But lunch was, again, a nightmare and I had ended up eating my sandwich outside, right by the damn smokers, none of which I knew.



Finally working out how to make the in-company instant messaging programme work I signed in and more than three hundred names were on my 'online' list. Furler S. was easy enough to find and a double click later I was staring at a small blank box. I sat on my hands, not a clue where to start and there was a bleep, a flash, and a message:



Furler.S: I thought I'd have heard from you before now. This mean things are going better today?



Ack.



Joonas: I got a card from the rest of the people who are beneath you. Welcoming me here and hoping I was okay and stuff. Was nice of them.



Furler.S: Oh? Well, I do like people beneath me... But yes, it was kind of them and I'm glad it made you happy and hopefully more comfortable here.



He liked people beneath him? Hell, I hoped this thing really was secure.



Furler.S: But really, how are things going? I was meant to try and find you at lunch but a meeting ran over.



Oh? That would have been kind of him.



Joonas: Things were okay but lunch is really weird for me. I'm not used to social eating and I ended up eating outside on the steps with all the bloody smokers! It was horrible and I now smell.



Furler.S: Why did you end up out there? Wasn't it raining at lunch?!



Joonas: Not really and I got a spot under cover. But the cafeteria is so big and daunting. Everyone acts like they know each other and the tables seat eight so I'd have to share.



Furler.S: I don't know what to suggest other than the days I'm free you could come eat with me but that might get you some odd looks and I know how self conscious you feel about being seen as close to the boss and all.



Joonas: Couldn't I just bring a packed lunch?



Furler.S: You won't socialise at all that way, Joonas. And there are weekly team meetings and moronic team building afternoons that you have to attend. Remember, the longer you keep away, the harder it will be.



He still didn't get it.



Joonas: Why would I want to socialise when it's exactly that which can make me feel so bad? Stapling your hand hurts you so you try your hardest not to do it, right? Socialising hurts me so I try my hardest not to do it. Please, don't force me to. I don't want to embarrass myself again.



Furler.S: Team meetings and team building are mandatory. You do them or you have no job.



Joonas: Please don't do this to me.



I felt desperate, panic rising through me. But how could I turn to him now? About this. I couldn't. He was going to make me do things with these people. Would there be public speaking? Would there be social drinking? Squeezing my eyes shut, I withheld a sob as blind panic threatened. Just as I began to lose my grip, my phone rang on the desk for the first time. It was Sem... Weird talking to someone on the phone when they're so close.



“Joonas, there is a call for you.” He sounded confused. “They asked for your personal line extension.”



“Um, did they say who it was?” I myself was confused, and damn well wary, turning the phone cable in my fingers as if it was a normal, boring phone call.



“Sheppherd. A David Sheppherd-”



“Oh fuck.” A thin woman walked past me and rose an eyebrow, forcing me to smile politely, apologetically at her.



“You know him? If you don't want to talk with someone then you don't have to. You are, for the most part, safe here.”



“He's my lawyer.” That should have been enough. And it was.



“You can use my office if you wish to speak privately with him. I need to go deliver papers to a couple of people anyway.” And that was all I needed. I was slamming the phone down and on my feet within a second, moving to Sem's office where he was already waiting by the door. “If he upsets you again, please don't jump out of the window. And remember to sit down because until you've been to the doctor tonight we don't know how great your feet are healing.”



I stood looking down at his huge, fancy phone with its little built in screen and flashing numbers. Sitting in his throne of a chair just felt wrong. I wasn't the boss. I was just the new guy, fucking things up in a new place and making loads of people think I was insane. What number to press? Eeny, meeny, miny, mo. Childish or what?



“Hello? .. Yes, this is he .. I really don't want to give you an official land line number though .. Because it's awkward and I came here to try and get some damn peace .. How can I owe so much in such a short space of time? I was paying. My bank set it up so the exact amount went out every week .. Well it's not MY fault it didn't work .. I'll try and call my bank later, okay? I'm at WORK right now .. Well it's not going so great .. Don't laugh at me down the fucking phone or I'll find a new lawyer quicker than you can say 'cheaper rates'.” Knocking on the door had me silenced and I put the phone down on the man without another word. He was an ass anyway.



“Come in?”



“Glad to see you decided to take a seat.” It was Sem. I must have plopped down into the chair part way through the conversation and I jumped out of it, grimacing as my feet complained. “Don't rush, don't rush. How was your phone call? You really didn't need to end it just because I knocked. I know how to wait.”



“Ah, mm, it's fine. Nothing important. All sorted... Are we able to use our private phones in the cubicles to make... Calls that are not work related or are they just for internal use?” It wasn't subtle at all but I just needed to know. I could talk with my bank publicly – I would have to give no major personal details and all I wanted to know was why a payment hadn't gone out. Nothing secretive there.



“You can but if your boss was to ever check the phone records and see a lengthy call going out of the office he would have to take that time as a break and dock your wages accordingly. Your boss, however, never checks the phone records so I'm sure you're safe. Do you need a hand back?”



“I can manage, I can manage...” I both sounded and felt tired. Phone calls were hard work. I moved to the door and looked back as he sank into his chair. “And I'm helping with dinner again. You can't say no.” He simply nodded and told me to wait around for him after work (like I had a choice) so that he could take me to the doctors.





Waiting around as the last few people picked up their belongings and left, I was beginning to feel bored. I could see Sem faintly between the all but closed blinds and he was both on the phone and in a meeting with someone I'd never seen. I could also hear him when he rose his voice, frowning and looking away. My computer was off, my desk was tidy, and I'd sipped enough water from the machine to feel the growing squirming feeling of needing to pee. Another five minutes down the line and I couldn't hold it in any longer. Cursing my plastic cup, I went as fast as my stinging feet would carry me to the bathrooms, flooded with relief when the place was empty. On my return, Sem and the other male were saying their goodbyes and shaking hands in the open and my boss smiled when he spotted me, giving a small wave in my direction. What followed was a hasty, hushed conversation and then the guy was gone, leaving Sem wandering to me, picking up my few things for me without asking permission first. How annoying.



“Let's go and get those feet seen to and then we can make dinner together. Been a long time since I've ever cooked with someone properly.”



The doctors waiting room was fancier than I thought it would be. It was also empty aside from the two of us and the receptionist who was slumped back in a chair, reading a magazine, no doubt looking forward to home time. I sat on the edge of my seat, hands clenched in my lap, staring at the clock.



“It's okay, Joonas. He's a good doctor and was kind enough to fit you in tonight specially because it was me that called. And I will be taking care of the bill for now.” For now. Those two words struck fear into me. How much did these things even cost?



A middle aged man, tall and blonde came through and called my name and I instantly looked to Sem.



“If you want me to come with you then I can. All you have to do it ask because it seems you have some difficulty in asking for what you want or need.” He lounged in his seat.



I couldn't go in there alone. He might tell me I have to have my feet chopped off! “Sem, would you... Please... Come in with me? I really don't wish to go by myself.” He smiled and got up, a hand on the small of my back guiding my way down a short corridor and into a light room, complete with everything that was usually found in a doctors office, plus a giant fish tank set into the wall. Just what you needed.



I was soon laid on the paper towel covered bed, feeling it stick at my thighs and tear when I not so subtly wiggled to try and free myself. The doctor was at my feet, donned in his rubber gloves. First came the inspection and notes, then came a prodding right in the middle of my foot. He was trying to be gentle enough but then there was pressure on one tiny spot and I was grabbing the edges of the bed, yowling.



“Yeah, seems you missed a bit, Sem. He won't have felt it much because it's right in the arch of his foot so little weight is sat there.”



“So it can just stay in right? And you'll never touch it like that again?” I was hopeful, very much so, but the frown and shake of the doctors head had me pressing into the bed with the back of my head. “I can't go through all that again like last night.”



“It's one piece, Joonas. Not fifty. So here's the plan. Because it's quite clear you don't like me poking and prodding around, I can give a tiny injection just under the skin and it'll numb the area so I can get the glass out and make sure it's completely clean. Because it's been in overnight, I'll need to wash it out and that can sting. Then I will quickly check over all the other spots and send you on your way.” I didn't have a choice from looking at Sem. Neither man was going to let me make a break for it. As the doctor went to get his no doubt mammoth sized syringe, I squirmed on the spot, told I couldn't pull my pants up just yet in case I irritated the glass in my foot. I didn't see why I'd had to have them off in the first place but when the doctor had asked if I'd checked everywhere for glass and I'd said no, I'd been told to whip them off so my legs could be given a once over. There had been no damage but, since I hadn't showered post incident, glass as fine as dust had settled amongst the hairs on my legs. “Sem, if you would like to sit a bit closer? At least for the injection part.. I remember what you said over the phone.” They shared a look and I scowled, shaking my head in disgust. He was just blabbering away my problems to everyone, wasn't he?



“What exactly did he say over the phone?” I avoided eye contact with Sem as he moved to sit up by my head, making us on the same level. I still stared at the doctor, scowl on my face when Sem gave a gentle pat to my arm.



“He said that you were showing signs of severe stress and I don't want anyone getting hurt, that's all. Nothing to worry about.”



“What you're really saying is he told you I was insane and that I hit him.” I felt two pairs of eyes on me suddenly, the doctor frowning.



“Yes, he told me that part. He also explained, in detail, how that action came about and I must say that, though my training in stress and mental health isn't great, I think it was a very common reaction. You got confused but you thought you knew exactly what was happening. I'm not here to judge you so please stop being so bug-eyed. You are lucky. You have found a man that is trying to understand and cares enough to keep going with you. I know of so many who wouldn't do such things. Now this is going to sting a fair bit so concentrate on the man you have found for a while and we'll have you all better again.”



As his head dipped down beyond my view I turned to look at Sem, no longer scowling. “Did you tell him we were together or something? He seems to think that you are my... Man.”



Sem laughed, smiling and taking a hold of my hand. “No, I didn't. You take his words the wrong way. He knows I'm your boss. I just think he's trying to break us into it gently so he can get what he wants.”



“And what is it that he wants?” I felt the sharp pin-prick and fought the urge to thrash. The sting followed and I whined long and hard.



“He wants to see people happy. I have been one of his patients for over ten years now. He seems to have it in his head that you make me happy...” I watched him closely as he shuffled in his seat, stroked a thumb over the back of my hand. “Not that you don't... Let's talk about something else, hm? Do you have pets? Are they in transport somewhere? You shouldn't pay holding fees just for my sake. I'm pet friendly.”



It was hard for me to concentrate on what was being said thanks to the stinging still going on in my foot but then an unpleasant numbness set in and I heard the doctor talking lightly to himself about how to get the foreign object out of my skin. “Ugh, huh? Yeah... One cat, one dog. They are in holding, yes. Not quarantine or anything though. Pet passports and stuff; expensive in the short term but make sense when you don't have to go through so much trauma. Are you actually saying you would have them in your place? That fancy place? Kitty moults like there's no tomorrow and the pooch has enough toys to sink a battleship. Why would you want them plus me in your place?”



“I'm thinking they might help to calm you down on a general level. And I think it is well worth a good try if there's even the faintest chance, don't you?”



I felt the doctor roam over my feet and assumed the rogue piece was out. There was a wash of some sort and bandages and I was being helped to sit back up. “Good thing you have Sem to drive you home and look after you.”



“It's not my home.” I grumbled as hands were on me, getting me on my feet again. Taking my time easing my shoes on and tying the laces, the doctor and Sem weren't being quiet about discussing my situation. The doctor thought I should be referred for mental questionnaires and all sorts of odd sounding, long winded meetings with people I didn't know. Sem was polite and professional, nodding and smiling, shaking the gentleman's hand before taking my own.





“So you want to pick up your pets at the weekend?” He'd waited until we were back at his place, me chopping up vegetables and chicken and him measuring out rice that, even uncooked, had the most delightful scent and was making me hungry. “Are they being held in this city? Do you know the address or a phone number? Or we can just look it up. I am a pro at googlemaps, I'll have you know.” He chucked a scoop of rice into a pan and sipped from his glass of wine.



Shuffling on tired, aching feet that were still bandaged and now minus socks and shoes, I slid all my work into Sem's wok and budged him out of the way with my hip and elbow, silently demanding that he let me take control. He promised, after all. Amidst the hissing and spitting from the oil meeting the water in all the chopped pieces, I looked up at him. “Mm, I think it's some place just out of the city but I don't know where. I paid extra for them to be placed somewhere other than the airport because I wanted to give myself a few days to get settled in my place. I think it was the only one around here that was in my price range that would hold both cats and dogs... And fish, so I was told. People travel with their fish these days?” I tossed the food, moving the wok with a flick of my wrist. Sem moved a touch. “There's nothing wrong with my hands. I can manage.”



“I never said you couldn't... But maybe people have expensive fish... Or those jet black ones with crazy bulging eyes. You know those? Are they expensive?” He held out a bottle of wine to me and I shook my head.



“I don't think they're expensive. Who would pay a lot for a butt ugly fish?”



“Some people like ugly things.”



“Some people are dumb.” I served up dinner and collapsed into one of the chairs at the table with a loud sigh. It felt so damn good to be off my feet. “When do you think I'll have normal looking feet again?”



“Few weeks maybe, depending on how you heal. So yes to get your pets soon? We'll need to buy pet things I assume? A bowl?”



“You haven't had pets before, have you?” I rolled my eyes when I was faced with his consistent smile. “Food bowls, water bowls, pooch bed, toys, litter tray, litter.” His face had dropped to a confused stare. “I can pay. My pets after all.”



“Mm, it's not that. I was just trying to make a mental list for when we go shopping. That can be tomorrow after work.”



“You going to be late again? Because I was waiting around and I could see you – not that I was snooping! - and, well, I was scared to go to the bathroom in case you finished while I was there and you thought I'd gotten to your place without you.”



“I would have waited a bit and then looked around for you. Your past comments on public transport aren't that positive and I'm almost certain you wouldn't find here on foot. And... You could barely walk.” He had a point there. “You got some sorta toilet slash peeing phobia I should know about?” He did an odd gesture with his hands, trying to word things carefully no doubt.



“Not really. I don't particularly like doing it when a stranger is stood right beside me, however and that happened yesterday. This big guy just parked up right next to me even though there was no one else.” I picked around the onion on my plate.



“Oh? Some guys are weird with their pee habits, I suppose.”



“He offered me a brownie after it. Is that normal for people under your ruling? He works on the same floor as me.”



“Man pees beside other man. Man then offers brownie. No, that doesn't make sense to me. Just try not to be scared about it. You can cause all sorts of problems with your bladder and kidneys if you hold in your pee for too long.” He seemed so content talking about bladders and pee during dinner and it struck me as odd. Maybe nothing phased him.



“I'm not scared. I just felt sort of dirty. Like he was paying me because he'd seen me pee close up or some shit. Pee fetish people are not my cup of tea.”



“What is your cup of tea?”



I lifted my gaze from my forkful of rice to see him looking at me, fork in one hand, glass of wine in the other. “Polite, safe chit-chat over dinner is my cup of tea. Or no talking at all even.” I shifted about, chewing the rice slowly.



“I didn't mean to weird you out, Joonas. But it was you that brought up pee.”

~~~

Author notes:

Lisa: Thank you for another review. Again, I'm pretty sure we're surrounded by silent people.I don't think any average person would put up with Joonas, but that's why Sem is so delicious and special :D



Tickles to my beta, MissusAnn (fp).