Product of the Broken

Ch.5


Kimber was right; god was such a prick sometimes. Nicolae hung up his coat in his closet as he listened with half awareness to Mitchell's current dilemma; he apparently needed entertainment for some grand and expensive party his business partners and he were holding this evening. Doing his best not to start swearing out loud Nicolae closed the closet door. "Now Mr. Slater let me get this straight you want me to entertain your party. No offence but don't you think you'd be better off hiring oh I don't know strippers?" It was outlandishly brave of Nicolae to just come out and say what he was thinking because any conversation before this with Mitchell hadn't differed very much from their first encounter. But Mitchell stood there as if he expected nothing but sarcasm from the younger man. "Actually Nicolae as enjoyable as hiring strippers would be we have to take one for the team and choose something a little more professional. Now there's no need in denying it We both know I've seen you play that awful piano my wife insisted I buy her but it seems the business partners from a siding company their head of company staff just adore it so I need to you for the evening." Taking a deep breath Nicolae knew he should just go along with it and play for them. Just give in to the man he told himself.
Nicolae would never understand the rich. He didn't understand how Kimber could stomach them. Mitchell had even gone as far as to pick out his clothing for the evening. He wasn't an infant he could think for himself; he didn't need Mitchell's self-prescribed ego telling him how to button his pants. But after his endless night with Kimber he hadn't the strength to pick a fight, at least not for a couple more hours. Nicolae sat at the piano stroking the soft skim of his bare forearm, turned slightly on the bench watching the grand party unfold.
He couldn't shake the awful feeling that Mitchell had told him a slight white lie to keep him home, while Cambria and Adara were conveniently not home. The room was full of nothing but corporate sharks, and Nicolae felt like a wounded mutt lost in the pulsating sea of predators he thought to himself ironically as a man in a solid burgundy dress shirt and black slacks walked towards him, "I don't even know how to swim." The man had all porcelain sapped teeth and store bought charm mixed in with things that reminded Nicolae of Mitchell. It all made him shudder. " So young man your Cambria's new assistant? Mitchell's told us so much about you." Oh I'm sure he has Nicolae retorted inside his mind. He wondered just what dear Mitchell had told all these men. He merely stared at the man and then turned away and began to play the piano. The man's face contorted slightly as he felt Nicolae's chilling attitude brush against his skin. Mitchell's had told him to play the piano, not act like a sweetheart. He played on hoping to lose himself in the notes but tonight was not going to be his night and it was becoming nauseatingly clear. The man hadn't left his side and he tried not to flinch as he saw out of the corner of his eye the man raise his arm, but to his relief he was only reaching out to set down his drink on top of the piano. "What agency did she hire you from?" He inquired in his own style of politeness. Nicolae shifted his eye's to look up at the man "Why don't you ask Cambria she knows all the details, I'm not at liberty to say to say." The man's expression did not change as he said. "Your quite an intelligent young man, with a very sharp tongue, it's no surprise she picked you out of whatever litter she was looking through, she always has liked the rebellious ones." She didn't pick me, I picked her and she's simply doing what I want her to be doing, he thought while licking his lips. Fingers never faltering on the key's Nicolae said coolly "Why don't you take your cocktail sir and get the hell away from me." He added as he put on his most sarcastically sweet smile "Please." This seemed to do the trick and he let out of a breath he hadn't been aware he'd been holding inside his mind.
Having to play for another hour before he felt hands on his shoulders, finger nails biting into him on a level above playfulness and just under brutality. Looking behind himself he stopped playing instantly. Cambria stood silently behind him her gaze showing nothing but displeasure. He'd seen worse looks on women. "What no 'Hello I missed you'?" He said causally. The scowl developing on her mouth only worsened. "I need to talk to you right now Nicolae." She said curtly leaving no room for complaints. Rising from the bench he stood in front of her. Allowing her and her rising anger to lead him to his bedroom. The voices from the sharks barely audible over the defending roar of the blood pumping in his veins, the electrical sensations of her emotions crackling against his face. "Well, we just keep ending up in here don't we." He said smiling brightly; he didn't know if he meant it or if he was just honestly wanting to piss her off and for what reason that would be behind he didn't know. The smile on his face however faded quickly only to be replaced by an annoyed sigh and the roll of his eyes towards the ceiling as she pleasantly told him to shut up. "Where were you last night? I looked all over for you" Nicolae stayed quiet for a moment before saying "Aw that's so sweet of you to go out looking for me but really don't worry where I went it's not important." Cambria bit her tongue. He worry this boy caused her yesterday and today was almost unbearable. " It does matter Nicolae you scared me okay you scared the living shit out of me, you didn't even call to say you'd be late." He knew she was right but he wasn't quite ready yet to submit to what she wanted him to act like whatever that may be today, being rebellious was just to enjoyable right now and he knew any minute now he'd lose his nerve anyway. So he thought he might as well enjoy it while he could.
Nicolae was quickly finding out however, that Cambria wasn't entirely like the women before her. She wasn't going to let him talk his way out of being in trouble. He felt like a child who'd got caught with their hand in the cookie jar and had pull out nothing but a ball of barbed wire. "Just tell me next time you plan on staying out all night okay?" He kept his arms crossed as he stood in front of her wondering how she could be so worried about him and yet discard him hours later for Mitchell's organization projects. "Were you really worried?" He asked as he rubbed the sides of his arms. "Yes Nicolae why wouldn't I be?" "I don't know. you seemed pissed off at me yesterday morning and then you didn't stop me from leaving in the morning so I figured you wouldn't care if I left for the night, I was planning on coming back you know." Whatever it was she had hoped to hear from him, this seemed to be close enough. Leaning forward she rested her head against his chest. "You realize Mitchell is three room away from us." He said as he proceeded to trace his fingers along her shoulders. "Mitchell doesn't even know you left, let alone that I'm even home." Laying his cheek down against the top of her head he took a moment to smell the unknown brand of hairspray in her hair. "Your playing such a delicately dangerous game Cambria. It's just cruel to pretend that doing what your doing is going to save your marriage, or me. Why not let your attention focus on something more worthwhile than my nightmares and issues it would really be less costly as far as being found out goes and you have to remember you have a child to take care of and I have only myself." In a way he thought his words felt hollow because he'd never warned any of the women before her. Why was she so special to be spared the awful gut wrenching conclusion that all these affairs before her had come crashing down to? You're being such a hypocrite, he told himself as his fingers trailed up to the back of her neck. She spoke against his partly exposed collarbone. "Nicolae you really do need to give yourself more credit, my marriage was trashed before I even said 'I do' I don't know if I'm looking for something to just finish it all off or what." Pausing she pressed her lips to his skin kissing it tenderly. "But I do see something in your Nicolae something I've never seen in anyone else I've ever been with in my life as stupid as that sounds it's true." He let his arms encircle her waist his fingers idly stoking the small of her back. "And what do you see in me? All the one's before you have 'seen' something to and yea know what? They only see what they want to see in me Cam, never what the need to see." She listened most closely to his words his tightly close tone but something had turned bitterly sour against her tongue as she silently spoke the words herself inside her mind. "What did you just say?" She asked pushing back slightly. He stared down at her honestly confused, unnecessary anger crackling against the surface of his skin. The lack of understanding from her to comprehend his meanings from the beginning was making him become careless. Within seconds he understood where'd he'd slipped up.
Sucking on his lower lip Nicolae watched her eyes narrow. "I said what do you see in me." This was certainly not what she wanted to hear and he could sense the hole he'd dug himself in was growing deeper. "No, after that Nicolae what do you mean by 'the one's before you'?" There was no getting out of this. "The girls I've dated before you a long time ago." It wasn't good enough, he knew that his answers were pathetic and he wasn't the only one who thought this. "The girls you've dated before me.uh huh I'm sure I bet their cute little things in mini skirts and pig tails that believe in sunshine and puppies and want to go to Yale when they graduate high school." He clenched his fists. "That's not fair Cambria and you know it." His voice had started out in a heated tone and had quickly liquefied into a stark whisper as he looked down at his feet, a dreadful habit of his childhood. "How many Nic, how many women have you picked up in that stupid subway you waste away your life in between staying in someone else's home, how many lie's do you slew to them? Is it something different every time? What did you tell the last woman, 'my mother never loved me' 'my father beats the shit out me on a daily basis.' I'm guessing it's the last one since it seems to be such a good way for you to show how well you could survive in Hollywood with an acting career!" She'd shoved him against the closet doors as she finished, the venom in her voice all but disintegrating his bones. She felt betrayed and jealous all at the same time he'd been using her this whole time and she didn't know which words that had fallen out of his mouth were true. She felt her hands shaking her whole body humming with pure adrenalin that tickled the inside of her brain.
Nicolae stood and as he suspected he received no help from Cambria as he stumbled slightly back against the closet doors. Good she was angry with him. Back to something he understood. She'd kick him out or he'd walk out. Part of him was a tad hurt she'd peeled out on him and handed him his own ass through his throat. He used everything he had not to care and willed himself to grab his trench coat and walk out of the room. He felt her gaze boring holes into his backside. He'd leave her unsatisfied in her quest for answers to cool her feeling of being mislead when she'd done half the leading herself. It had only taken one night to cause all this sudden damage. He scolded himself as he shut the front door. Never should have spilled your guts to her you stupid bitch you should've known she wouldn't believe you, he thought bitterly. He thought about going back to Kimbers but the idea of hearing Kim's classic 'I told you so' speech only caused his stomach to turn. He knew she hadn't moved from where he'd left her standing; he hadn't bothered to take anything he hadn't come with in the beginning. He hadn't even said goodbye. Then again she hadn't deserved the honor of hearing those words. "So much for seeing something in me." He said only to himself as he once again made his way downtown.
There were places downtown even Kimber wouldn't go in. Most naturally assumed Nicolae wouldn't venture inside of them himself, let alone go inside by himself. But Nicolae wasn't a child, not by any standards had he ever really been one in the first place. He couldn't even fathom what a childhood was even like. When Nicolae had first become truly homeless he'd wandered downtown aimlessly knowing no one could do any worse to him then his father had done. And the people who crossed his path saw this as well. Saw it in his gold colored eyes, the abuse etched into his bones. He'd had no concern to return to his job as a waiter near his home whether the house remained empty or not he wasn't welcome there. So with the prospect of eating out of trashcans and peddling his ass on a street corner he decided to try getting work in the 24 hour diner in the worst part of downtown. It was better then knowing every man for the rest of his life as John. The diner had worked for a little while. But the place got the worst customers imaginable, and on occasion it got robbed Nicolae hardly wanted to get shot in the gut. Especially when he'd never had medical insurance in his life.
So he took to leaving early, sometimes before his lunch break and not returning until the next morning. No one would miss him; his boss didn't even know his name. He often found himself behind a produce store on the eastern side of downtown after work watching the back street boxing. The people who fund enjoyment in this sport that was entirely illegal were often the gangs and the low lives that snorted whiskey for a living. But there was also the rich who filtered in and out on occasional fight nights keeping tabs on people but most ignored them. The people who participated in the fights were mainly runaways like himself and most often or not any older then 18, and pretty much forced into retirement by their fourth match. Nicolae never had any interest in fighting, he'd been beat up enough already and had no need to do it for money, but there was no doubt it paid pretty well. You could see it in the faces of those who made it until the final bell rang, how they knew they'd get something good. However he didn't keep coming to see them the kids. He came for one fighter in particular who was there every night, if he wasn't knocking the crap out of some punk, he was watching the gutter children and the street punks fight. He seemed to love the sights and the sounds the smell of the blood and sweat. Watching men spit out mouthfuls of blood and teeth onto the ground. Nicolae had been drawn to him in the worst type of way, infatuated with his nature and looks; He went every night after work to watch this man fight. Keeping just on the outside of the fringe of people. Nicolae's hair had been so long hen it curled at the ends and have him that painfully girlish appearance with his thin body to match it.
One night however, Nicolae couldn't make it to the fights. Apparently his boss remembered enough of his name and had a little more brain matter then he'd previously assumed to catch on that Nicolae had been skipping hours, so he'd threatened to hold his check unless he made up those hours. So he was trapped inside the evil diner of horrendous food, serving coffee and receiving unpleasant glares from bubbly girls who failed to hold his attention for more then time it took him to take their orders. He was in the kitchen at the time when he heard someone up front asking a waitress if a boy named Nicolae was working tonight. He didn't know anyone else who came downtown but Kimber, and he hadn't seen the other boy in weeks, so he knew right away it couldn't be him. Popping his head over the grills to get a better look at that was talking he suddenly felt like he'd swallowed hi tongue. Slowly making his way behind the counter he saw the waitress point him out and the young man asking for hi followed her finger. He only studied Nicolae appearance for a few seconds before taking a seat at a booth across from the counter as if waiting for Nicolea to get the message and come over. When the waitress looked in Nicolae's direction she merely shrugged off his questioning stare. Shuffling over to the booth, Nicolae paused next to it about to take his order but what the young man said first stopped him. " Why didn't you come watch me fight tonight?" So he had noticed him after all. He hadn't even been sure the back street brawler even knew he existed until now, and it rather unnerved him that he'd gone out of his way to find him.
When Nicolae didn't answer him right away the brawler simply motioned for him to sit down on the other side of the booths table. Doing as he was told he glanced aroid once or twice to make sure his charming boss wasn't around to scold him for slacking off. The brawler seemed to sense his nervousness "Don't worry he isn't around to yell at you I made sure to come by on his break to the liquor store, you haven't answered my question." Trying to look away Nicolae fidgeted in his seat "I had to work tonight, I've been skipping shifts to watch your fights, so my boss threatened to hold my check if I didn't work tonight." The brawler raised a brow. "When does your shift end?" Nicolae looked at the clock on the far wall of the diner. "In...ten minutes why?" Brushing his hangs out of his face Nicolae watched him carefully. "I asked around about you it's how I know what your name is and I heard you've been sleeping in the alleys that isn't a nice place to stay in, even the street punks who lose all their teeth get better places." Nicolae glared at the brawler. "That's why you came here? To rub it in my face that I don't have anywhere to go?" Rising up from the booth Nicolae had had enough of the conversation and only wanted to get away from it, he gasped feeling the older boys hand grip his wrist from across the table. "Sit down and relax, I didn't come here to rub anything in your face. I came to ask if you wanted a place to crash at.yea know so you don't have to sleep on the freaking ground." Biting the inside of his mouth Nicolae looked at the brawler as if he'd grown as second head on his shoulders. "You don't even know me and you want to give me a place to stay? Look I'm sorry if you think I'm some stupid ass fairy with a crush on you, I just think your cool that's all I swear if you want me gone I won't ever come to the fight again." Nicolae said shaking his head as he spoke fingers fluttering on the edge of the tabletop. Rubbing the back of his neck the brawler could see the younger boy was more then timid about taking help from anyone but at the same time not stupid about it either when it came to life on the streets. "No I like seeing you come to the fights, but I've noticed a lot of the time you look half dead. I don't get many fans and so I finally got the chance to ask about you so I'm not some psychotic weirdo after your vital organs, anyway I'm pretty damn sure you hate this job" Biting his lower lip in thought Nicolae tried to relax as he'd been instructed to do, he honestly wanted to believe this mans words. More then anything he wanted them to be truth.
But he'd been born not entirely knowing the difference between the truth and flat out lies, he had no home, no real life nor had he ever so what did he have to lose by taking the brawlers offer? He didn't sense any hostility in the man who was at best 3 or 4 years older then himself. Sliding out of the booth Nicolae took off his nametag and set it down on the table. "I'll go with you." He said as bluntly as he could. The brawler merely smiled and slid out of the booth to stand beside him. "I'm glad and by the way I'm Alice." He watched Nicolae's face contort slightly. "I know it's a weird name lets just say my mother really wanted a girl." Nicolae shrugged "It's okay I like that name, it suits you."
Over a course of a month Alice had inwardly regretted his idea of taking the younger boy in. It wasn't that the kid got on his nerves, oh no Nicolae was wonderful, and a great help around the apartment. He kept it clean all the time like a miniature housewife. It was that wonderfulness about him that caused Alice's stomach to twist into knots. He'd learned very early on that hardly a soul on this earth had ever treated this boy right. It made him want to keep Nicolae hidden away under the covers of his bed, safe away from the outside world. Well as safe as safe could be in downtown. He'd told himself in the beginning he was only going to give Nicolae a place to stay and be his friend. Alice had ended up scoffing at the foolishly used words. Nice to know I have so much will power, he'd told himself. There was just something about Nicolae that pulled you in and refused to let go. It was in his eye's, his voice, the way his skin felt early in the morning. Alice could hear the silent pleas in his every move, 'please don't leave me' and Alice had made the fatal mistake of promising him just that. Promises were often made to be shattered.