Pain and.. pain?

Ha! An update! I promise a quicker update didn't I :D
I'm still working on the last chapters, too much going on in my life at the moment but I'm trying to work on it at least a little bit everyday. Usually I just end up writing after I get off from work in the evenning around ten.

Hope you like it and please review after reading!

xo




CHAPTER 44




It had been a week since the trip to the zoo. A week since Jonathan had taken me away. A week from the first rape.

I sat on the floor in the corner of the room and dozed against the wall. I hadn’t slept properly once in this room and I didn’t plan to either. I couldn’t afford to let down my guard for a moment. I didn’t want to die here.

Last night Jonathan had given me my boxers back for the first time, a reward from being a good boy. I had been a good boy; not once had I fought against him or refused to do something, not because I wanted to have sex with Jonathan or be here but because I knew that I needed to make the man trust me.

I wrenched my eyes open and looked around the room with tired puffy eyes. Nothing had changed since Jonathan had brought me in for the first time; the room was as grey as ever. I dropped my eyes back on the floor when I heard the lock click before it opened. Jonathan walked in with his jacked on and came to me holding a bottle of water and a plate with sandwiches on it.

He grouched down in front of me and set the plate down with a smile. “Dinner. I’m leaving now, alright? I’ll be back in two days, don’t worry. I won’t leave you locked up without food or water.” He said and cupped my face with his hand. I froze for a moment before forcing myself to lean into his touch with my eyes closed.

“Promise?” I whispered quietly and received a kiss on my forehead.

“I promise kid. I’ll see you soon alright?” Jonathan said and stood up again. I watched his feet walk away until the door closed and rubbed my face frantically where he had touched me. I heard the car start and then drive away and listened carefully until silence fell again. I was alone.

I sat still for a long time until my toes felt cold. The temperature in the room was falling slowly and I shivered. Had Jonathan turned off the heat when he had left? I frowned and stood up stiffly. My muscles protested on the movement and I pulled the blanket tighter around myself to try to keep the cooling air away from my skin. I padded across the room to the door and tried the handle even though I knew it was pointless, it was steadily locked.

I licked my cracked lips and turned away from the door, now facing the boarded window. I knew it was pointless too but went closer to touch the dusty glass. It was cold against my fingertips and a long shiver ran down my spine. I sighed and banged my head against the cool screen with a thump. I closed my eyes for a moment before opening them again and staring at the window close to my eyes. After a moment of pointless staring I shifted my eyes and stared at the wide blanks on the outside of the window instead. I stared a bit more until something made me freeze.

In the edge of the second blank from the bottom was a little hole. It was barely noticeable but it seemed like the blank had decayed over time. I bit down on my lower lip in concentration and ran my fingers along the glass until they rested above the decayed spot. Were all the blanks softened by the elements of nature or just this one?

I turned away from the window and padded across the room back to my corner. I sat down and pulled my feet under myself to warm up my icicle like toes.



I couldn’t stop staring at the window and kept trying to see the decayed spot from across the room. It could be possible, couldn’t it? If the blanks were decayed enough then maybe.. maybe it could be possible. A small voice in the back of my head was nagging at me to just forget it, to just wait for Jonathan to return and hope that the man would be in a good mood.

A bigger voice told me it was worth a shot; that I had nothing to loose. I knew I couldn’t go back to my old life and that was what was going to happen if I didn’t do something about it. I had no one to help me; I had to help myself or submit to the fact that I was going to live the rest of my life as someone else’s plaything.

I stood up and pulled the blanket tighter around myself before walking across the room to the window. I pressed my forehead against the cool surface for a moment before stepping away from the glass and letting the blanket fall off my shoulders. I wrapped the blanket around my right fist before taking a deep shuddering breath and pulling my shoulders back.

There was a loud crash and my fist ached but the glass was broken. I withdrew my hand slowly and winced when I saw the blood on my forearm where the blanket hadn’t covered my skin properly. I used the blanket as a cover for my hands when I worked on pulling the glass shards off the hinges. I knew I had no chance of detaching the whole window but I was skinny enough to fit through only one of the squares of glass.

After removing all the glass, I dropped the blanket and reached through the window hinge to run my fingers over the surface of the old blanks. It felt porous and I raked my nail over it, feeling the top surface rumble a little. It courage me to use my force and a moment later I was clawing bits and pieces off the wide blanks with my fingers, ignoring the pain it caused.



I took breaks, sitting in the corner to warm up inside the blanket until returning to my task. I had managed to claw a hole through one of the blanks and I could see light seeping through it; it was daytime. I worked hard on the blanks, my fingers bleeding and my blood smearing the wood but I didn’t give up. The pain in my hands was nothing compared to the pain I was going to go through if I would still be here when Jonathan came back. The window was already broken, he would know that I had tried to escape; there was no turning back.

It took me hours of sweat and blood to get the hole big enough so I could push my whole arm through it, to feel the cooling air outside. The night had fallen and I knew that my time was running out. The hardest part was still ahead; breaking through the still hard parts of the wood. I felt exhausted and sank onto me knees tiredly, resting my forehead against the wall. Cold sweat ran down my back and my breathing was heavy. I looked down at my sore hands and cringed at the sight of them; they were messed up. I could hardly bend my fingers anymore from the swelling and they throbbed all the time now.

I sighed and climbed back on my feet shakily before attacking the boards outside the broken window again. I used my bodyweight to rock them back and forth in hopes of loosening the old rusty nails holding them still. I just needed a small enough hole to squeeze myself through, I didn’t care if I tore off my skin in doing so but I needed to get out of this room, out of this house.




It took me the rest of the night and the whole next day to loosen the blanks. They were tightly nailed down but with enough time and effort, pain and sweat, I finally managed to dislodge one of them and heard the heavy piece of wood drop on the ground outside with a thump. I took a deep breath and wiped at my forehead with the back of my hand before cringing at the sweat burning in the cut wounds breaking my skin.

The gap wasn’t big even now that the blank was off and I measured it in my mind to decide if I could fit through it already. It was evening already and Jonathan would be back in the morning so I needed to hurry up. I decided to try and dislodge another blank, just to get more room and make crawling through easier for myself. I didn’t want to hurt myself more than I already had.




I was loosening the second board when something made me freeze. The sound of tires against grovels, the sound of an engine and then silence. Panic washed over me and jumped towards the window. I dove out head first and forced my shoulders through the hole. I was thankful for Jonathan for starving me because the resent weight loss made this a hell of a lot easier. It was painful but I managed to force myself through the gap in the boards. Long red welts appeared when my skin was scraped away and I had to bit down on my lower lip when I fell on the ground with a painful thump.

I rolled over on my knees and took a deep breath before getting on my feet. I took a moment to listen to my surroundings and after only registering silence, took off in the direction of the woods behind the house.

I needed to get to the closest neighbor; the bad news was I had no idea where the closest house was. I decided to head towards the main road we had drove along to come here and stuck to the shadows of the trees while walking slowly with my arms wrapped around myself. Shit it was cold. My feet were freezing and falling numb fast but I pushed forward.

“Jason!” Jonathan’s voice bellowed from behind me suddenly and I stumbled so badly that I fell on my knees and swore in my mind while trying to calm my thumping heart. I could hear Jonathan swearing and turned to look in the direction of the house. He was looking around furiously while swearing out loud. I took a deep breath and got on my shaky feet slowly, not wanting Jonathan to see me but eager to get some distance between us. I continued towards the main road slowly, trying to move silently while listening to the sounds Jonathan was making at the same time.

When I heard the car engine roar back to life, I stopped and knelt on the moist ground. I huddled in the darkness and watched how the headlights of Jonathan’s car sped away from the house until they disappeared into the darkness and I dared to breath freely again. He was gone. I got up from the forest floor and started moving again, ignoring the wet leaves stuck on my knees now.




I hadn’t been able to feel my feet in a long time now and I couldn’t stop my teeth from clattering but I didn’t let myself to stop and rest. I could see lights through the trees and kept my eyes focused on them so I wouldn’t loose them out of my sight. Those lights were my only hope.

The house was made of round timber and sat comfortable in the surrounding woods; it was more of a cabin really. The lights I had seen were on the front porch and when I reached the edge of the forest, I stopped. There was a big black truck parked in front of the house so someone was definitely home but still I hesitated. The truck in itself seemed intimidating and I wasn’t sure I could trust the owner. I licked at my cracking lips and hugged myself tighter with my thin arms. What if who ever lived here knew Jonathan? What if they were going to take me back to him?

I felt tears in my eyes and were just about to step forward when the door of the cabin opened and a big man stepped outside wearing a black and red checkered hunting coat. Behind him a brown chocolate lab ran out and off the porch. I shivered and took a step backwards. The man was scary. I could always walk to the next house for help.

My feet shuffled against the forest floor and the lab perked his droopy ears instantly before turning to look at me. I held my breath in fear and tore my eyes away from the dog to glance at the man on the porch. He was watching his dog with interest and then turned his eyes in the direction the dog was looking at. I swore in my mind and turned to run.

I heard the dog bounce towards me and a cry of fear escaped my lips. Before I could take three steps, my exhausted feet failed me and I stumbled. The dog was on me in an instant and I curled up in panic, breathing in hard sharp gasps but managing to stay quiet. Maybe the man hadn’t noticed. Maybe he would just call his dog away and not come to investigate what his dog had seen. Please please please, don’t come here, I begged in my mind and kept my eyes tightly closed.

“What is it girl? What do you have there?” A grumbling voice asked and tears burned in my eyes when I tried to protect myself from the dog. I could feel her breath against my neck and then a big tongue starting lapping at me. I cringed and tried to roll away from the drooling dog.

“Tessa, here!” The man ordered a few feet away and the lab moved away from me instantly. I took in a shaky breath and uncurled myself to look at the man carefully. We stared at each other for a moment in total silence, me in total panic and the man clearly dumbfounded to find a nearly naked kid on his yard.

“What the.. Who the hell are you?” The man asked and I snapped back into action. I rolled on my knees and tried to get up, unsuccessfully. “Hey, hold on a minute!” The man rumbled and with a few quick steps could grab a hold of my arm. I cried out in fear and dunked my head down, expecting a hit.

“I-I’m s-sorry, s-s-sir. I-I’ll g-go. P-Please d-don’t h-h-hurt m-m-me.” I stuttered in tears and the man stilled.

“Hey, come on now kid. I’m not going to hurt you. Come on, stand up.” He said and I struggled to stay on my feet. “What’s your name? What are you doing here?”

“J-J-Jason. P-Please h-h-help m-me?” I begged and the man frowned. I kept my head down, too afraid to look at him and my body went rigid when a strong arm wrapped around my waist.

“Come on then, let’s get you out of the cold. You’re turning blue.” The man grumbled and started helping me towards his cabin while the lab jogged ahead.

We were greeted by warm air and I looked around in the cabin nervously. It looked cozy and the bristling fire in the fireplace made the air nice and warm.

In about two minutes I found myself on a worn down couch wrapped in a thick blanket with a cup of hot chocolate in my frozen hands. I was still trebling from cold and tried to wiggle my cold toes inside the huge pair of woolen socks the man had given me.

“My name is Garry by the way. Now, want to tell me how you ended up in the woods?” The big man asked while settling in a huge armchair.

I hugged the warm mug close to my chest and let my head drop forward until my chin rested against my chest. “I r-ran f-from h-him.” I stuttered quietly and tried to will away the tears reforming in my eyes.

“From who?” Garry asked with a frown and I wiped a tear off my cheek. Damn, I was too tired to stop them.

“J-Jonathan.” I whispered brokenly and Garry watched me closely for a moment before realization seemed to dawn on him.

“Fucking hell.” He crumbled under his breath and got back on his feet. “I don’t have a phone here so I can’t call help but there’s a hospital about an hour ride away. I’ll borrow you clothes for the ride. I think we should leave as soon as possible.” He said and I hunched on my seat.

Half an hour later we were on the road. I was wearing clothes dozen sizes too big for me and had the blanket still wrapped around me. Garry had cooked and we had eaten before leaving and now that I felt warm and safeish, exhaustion rolled in full force. I leaned against the door, as far away from Garry as possible before closing my eyes and letting go.




I woke up when Garry stopped the car in front of the hospital. He turned off the engine and was around the car in a blink of an eye to help me. I was feeling stiff and weak after sleeping awkwardly in the car and he had to hold me up while we walked to the emergency entrance. I kept my head down and felt fear raise its head inside me again; I didn’t like being around so many people.




I was through triage quickly, I guess I looked as rough as I felt, and to my relief the doctor was a grey haired lady. I was already feeling jumpy and panicky and I think that a male doctor would have pushed me over the edge of blind panic.

As it was, Dr. Helton was quick and gentle in her check and I moved into a private room within an hour. I had an IV in my arm and warming blankets wrapped around me. I had been near to hypothermia by the time I had reached Garry’s cabin and according to Dr. Helton the man had saved my life; if I had spent the rest of the night outside dressed only in my boxers, I would have been dead before sunrise. My hands were wrapped in thick bandages; I had cut them so badly that they had needed some stitching up, and they were still throbbing despite the painkillers I had been given.

I was exhausted but didn’t want to sleep. The room was dimmed to help me rest and I felt tears pool in my eyes again. The cops were coming to talk with me later and I didn’t want to wake up with them in the room. I heard the door open slowly and turned my head towards it. It was Garry.

He smiled at me and I managed a feeble smile back. “I see they got you all taken care of. I have to head back soon but I wanted to come by to say bye. I got to go see to Tessa, she doesn’t like being alone.” Garry said and came closer. I nodded tiredly and licked my cracked lips carefully.

“T-Thank you.” I whispered and Garry smiled.

“I’m glad I could help. I talked to the doctor; she said you’ll be as good as new. They told me your family is already coming here.” The big man said and I looked away from him.

“Foster family.” I said quietly and felt an invisible weigh settle on my chest again. I was afraid they were going to take me away from Rose now. It scared me shitless to think of having to go into a new foster family or an orphanage.

Garry gave a small nod and offered another smile. “I have to go now. I left my name and address on the front desk so keep me posted on how things go, okay?” He said and I nodded carefully. The man might have looked scary on first sight but he was alright. He had helped me even though he had had no obligation to do so. He could have just told me to get off his property; that was what I was used to, living in the city my whole life.

Garry left and I continued my battle against sleep. It didn’t take long to find a winner to that battle when I fell into a restless slumber.