Heaven Far Away

@_AshLee_: Thank you for your comment! I'm glad you enjoyed Gen/Ren's little bickering. Unfortunately, perhaps the promise wouldn't be as sexy as thought possible.

@Nekoii-desu: Thank you for all your comments! They certainly serve as more than enough motivation for me! To answer your questions: Kazuya techincally isn't a virgin any more, since he has been forced into having sex previously. The italicized part at the beginning only serves as an intro to the story, it's not too important. Although, I do think it will become more clear in the end. Bakusui is mainly the trainer, he used to be a host there as well. However, if clients specifically request for him, then he will take clients as well right now. The number one uke in Opiate should make his appearance within the next two chapters. Please look forward to it!

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Chapter Four - A Regretful Fantasy

This isn’t a present!

That sentence went through Kazuya’s head repeatedly for the past hour or so. It’s been two days since when the owner promised him a present. At first, he thought the owner had forgotten already, but when he called earlier this morning and told him to dress up, Kazuya’s heart started beating at an abnormal rate. Between the limited numbers of suits that he had, he carefully chose one that fit the best and eagerly waited for the appointed time. Every minute felt like eternity, he paced the room, he tided up little things, he even wanted to clean up the entire floor just because then, it would give him something to do.

And now… now…

You lied!

That was what Kazuya’s glances toward the owner spoke of, which, of course, Konbayoshi ignored promptly.

“So, how are you enjoying your experience at Opiate so far?” It was asked by Ito Narumi, also known as Haruno Narumi.

This was the owner’s present, to have dinner with the manager Haruno and his wife. Present? He thinks not! They were at an expensive, traditional Japanese restaurant that was apparently the favourite of Narumi’s. It was by request that they come here since Narumi just came back from over seas after a month of work. She had specifically mentioned how much she’s missed authentic Japanese food.

She was a woman who was kind and humble, though she could be a bit too loud at times; Kazuya supposed that all in all, she was a woman whom one could spend an entire life with. Besides, the manager looked more than happy with her, that’s what’s most important.

“I enjoy it.” Kazuya replied with a smile directed towards her, it was a genuine one and he was speaking of the truth as well. “I am still in training stages, so I’m not yet a host, but I do enjoy the setting.” Because the owner-sama was there, so even if it was hell, he would enjoy it tremendously.

However, he was supposed to be disappointed and angry at said owner right now.

“What? Is Konbayoshi not treating you like a second class citizen?”

Konbayoshi felt that familiar vein throb upon his temple and he looked at Narumi out of the corner of his eyes. This woman, he would never understand why Haruno married her in the first place! Just think, their daughter carries half of her genes too, what is she going to grow up like?!

“Eh?” Kazuya wasn’t quite sure how to reply. However, it seemed that Narumi didn’t really want an answer out of him either way, as she was smirking towards the owner this entire time.

“You know, looking down his nose at everyone else. You know when we first met; he wouldn’t even look at me properly. Even ‘till this day, he tells Shouhei that he is not good enough for me and…”

“It is you who is not good enough for him.” Konbayoshi had to interject.

Kazuya looked to his left at the manager, whom was sitting there with a mild little smile and eating his dinner without a care in the world. As if this was normal. Maybe it was?

“Aww, isn’t it cute?” Narumi leaned on her left arm and reached out to pat Konbayoshi’s cheek with seeming affection, Kazuya glared at that hand immediately. “He’s jealous. Who’d have thought that underneath this mask of a face that Konbayoshi here is capable of feeling as well? Shouhei, you should thank your ancestors for this blessing.”

“Haruno, if you don’t want to be a single man again, you had better remove this woman from my sight this instant.” Konbayoshi spat out from between his teeth but he made no attempt to remove her hand.

Kazuya wished that he would have though, or else, he’d have to hope that his glare would be strong enough to burn that limb right off. When Narumi finally had enough of teasing the annoyed man, her gaze wavered just a single degree and she caught the glare that was directed towards her direction.

Her hand, to be more specific.

Then she understood.

With a smile, she retracted her hand and looked at Kazuya with a knowing smile. She wondered if Konbayoshi knew, but at the same time, she wondered how could he not know. The question becomes, what is he going to do about it? Knowing this man, he probably wouldn’t even acknowledge it. Narumi wondered if Kazuya knew what this man was made out of.

“I don’t understand why you two have to do this every time that we come out together. Especially now that Kazuya is here as well, must you two embarrass yourselves so?” Haruno commented lightly, still eating as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened.

“Oh no, no, it’s fine, I don’t mind.” Kazuya shook his head quickly, not wanting to have the owner think ill thoughts of him. At his reply, Konbayoshi sent him a glance and Kazuya quickly averted his gaze.

Narumi didn’t let anything pass her eyes. Perhaps it was the fact that she was a book editor and every little detail would have to be noticed.

“Say, Konbayoshi, you’re already way old, what are you going to do about a family, huh?”

Was this on purpose? Kazuya felt his insides clench once again. He kept his gaze on the food in front of him, but every little cell in his body was dedicated to this topic at hand.

“Your husband is the same age as me.”

“Ah but you see, he’s my husband, so he has a family already. When are you going to be someone’s husband?”

Kazuya couldn’t help but shift nervously in his seat. Narumi may be asking these questions to Konbayoshi, but her eyes were spared for him instead. He wondered if she knew, so that’s why she was doing this. He wondered if everyone sitting at this table knew, but decided not to do anything about it.

“Why are you so concerned? You talk too much.”

“Tell me Konbayoshi, is your type still the same as previously?” She carried on as if the owner had not spoken at all.

“What are you talking about?”

“You know, beautiful appearance, sophisticated, gentle, kind, tolerant, patient, must be good with words, and must have a beautiful smile, liked by everyone. Someone who seems to be perfect on the front but deep down, they must have an evil streak and be determined without an end. Someone whose anger could flatten the entire world.”

Seemed like a rather hypocritical person to Kazuya.

Haruno paused for a brief second before resuming his dinner, Konbayoshi had tensed before he snorted and picked up his wine glass casually. “That is not my type; you’ve got it all wrong.”

“Have I now?”

That topic of conversation ended there, leaving Kazuya breathless. He memorized that list and mentally went through all the qualities again and again. He wondered if he was composed of any of those qualities, whether he would ever acquire those qualities. This night was not what he had expected, but at the same time, he was glad that the owner brought him here. It meant that the owner was willing to be seen –by him- in such a position, where he bickered with someone as if a child.

A different him, a him that’s not been presented during working hours. And sadly, it seemed like it was always working hours with him.

Later that night, the four were approaching their cars parked out in the front. Of course, the Haruno couple would be going back to their own home; Konbayoshi and Kazuya would return to Opiate. They wanted to part ways but the pouring rain outside had held them back, none were too eager to head out and get wet. In the end, Haruno and Konbayoshi decided to make a run for it despite the conditions, it left Kazuya and Narumi in the restaurant’s foyer, looking out the window paned doors.

“Why must they rush like this? If we wait a bit, I’m sure the rain will slow.”

“The only way to this restaurant is to pass a bridge that’s built across a river, I’m sure you’ve noticed on the way here?” Kazuya nodded. “The water level rises really fast, so if we waste any more time, we may not be able to get across that bridge and would be forced to spend the night on this mountain. And I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, this restaurant is the only thing civilized on this mountain.”

That’s right! Now that she’s mentioned it, Kazuya remembered the route here had been filled with wilderness and lots of mountains. The bridge did not look sturdy enough to hold a two
-lane traffic, he remembered being nervous for those seconds that they drove across.

Yes, they had a good reason to hurry.

After a second of silence, Narumi spoke once again. “How long have you known Konbayoshi?”

“Not very long, almost half a year.” Kazuya answered truthfully.

“And how long have you liked him?”

“Wha… I… you…” Kazuya started. Although he wasn’t about to discredit that claim, it was still somewhat mind numbing at the same time.

“Oh save it, you can’t be any more than obvious.” Narumi brushed his stuttering attempts aside with a casual wave of her hand. “Just answer the question.”

“Ever since I first met him.”

She whistled lightly and Kazuya glanced at her again. He wondered how the manager had managed to come to love her. The manager has always been the somewhat soft one; Kazuya’s always imagined him with an equally soft person. Narumi was so much out of what Kazuya’s expected.

“I gotta give it to you kid.” She spoke with certain admiration with a light shake of her head. “I seriously don’t know what you see in Konbayoshi.” Kazuya wanted to glare at her, but forced himself to tone down the malice in that gaze, she still caught it. Or perhaps, she was waiting for it. Narumi laughed and patted his shoulder. “Have fun with it kid, I hope you endure.” She paused and retrieved her hand, looking hesitant. “I… about Konbayoshi…” Kazuya looked towards her intently, waiting for the remaining of her sentence. “… there is something… well…”

It would have to stop at that, for she didn’t want to continue on any further. At the same time, the two men finally have arrived at the door. Haruno had already opened up an umbrella for Narumi, while Konbayoshi stood underneath the ledge of the roof to avoid getting any more wet.

“Let’s just go now; we’ll talk more another time.” Haruno decided and Konbayoshi agreed with a lift of his hand to signal a parting greeting, the couple prepared to take off.

“Don’t die Konbayoshi, if you die, my husband will be even busier.”

Although Narumi’s parting words defined malice, but there was actual warmth and care beneath her words; just enough for Konbayoshi to know and have grown used to knowing. Kazuya was more than a little dubious.

“Go die. Haruno would be much better off without you.”

Narumi merely gave him a smile before turning to Kazuya instead. “Kazuya-chan, let’s keep in touch! You can always babysit our daughter for us, what do you say?”

“Sure!” Kazuya nodded eagerly, his head already filled with images of the cute little child. Narumi was satisfied with the answer.

The two of them watched the couple depart and Konbayoshi unbuttoned his overcoat to hold out for Kazuya, whom received it and looked up at Konbayoshi with some confusion. “Put it over your head, we’re leaving. Come on.” The owner turned and headed for his car without another word.

Kazuya looked at Konbayoshi’s departing view before putting it on his head carefully. He was surrounded by the scent of Armani Code, as if he was surrounded by the owner.

“Hurry up!” Konbayoshi called out from inside the car, the passenger door was opened from the inside. The host-in-training quickly tucked it around himself and made for the car. He all but slid right into the car and shut the door behind him. The wind was hitting the car with all its ferocity, the windshield wipers doing their best to break a line of sight for the driver.

Besides him, Konbayoshi merely lifted a hand and threaded his fingers through his dark hair to brush back strands that have fallen to his eyes. Kazuya peeked at him meekly one glance at a time, although the car was still cool from being unused for the past couple of hours, his body felt hot.

The owner was a quiet one; he did not speak throughout the entire trip towards the bridge. Kazuya held the coat close to him and sat properly, in front of the owner, he’s always felt like such a shy kid. Perhaps he was just a kid after all. The car moved along at a snail pace, the windshields and headlights doing their best to help their way. Haruno’s car was already no where in sight, Kazuya half wondered just how fast he drove.

When the car screeched to a stop, Kazuya held out a hand to brace the impact.

“Owner-sama…?” He looked towards his side, the owner’s face was a grim one, he did not look happy at all. “Is something the matter…?”

The owner heaved a heavy sigh and leaned back against the leather seat, his fingers rubbing his temple. “The bridge is gone.”

“Huh?” Kazuya turned back out to the front and tried to peer out at the darkness. Indeed, he could only see the rushing of the water over where they were headed. He remembered what Narumi said moments ago and wondered if the couple had made it across or not. “What are we going to do then?”

“What can we do?” The owner all but snapped and he muttered a low curse underneath his breath before turning to look out the window at… nothing but rainfall at this moment. He next reached for his cell phone and found a low signal bar that threatened to give out depending on the direction that the owner was holding it.

Could this be fate? For good or for disaster? Kazuya didn’t know.

This uncomfortable silence was suffocating. Kazuya knew that the owner was not pleased, he couldn’t get back to the club tonight, and it looked like he was having trouble contacting people in the club as well. Should he say something? But then, what if he says something wrong and the owner gets even worse?

He suddenly remembered what Narumi said at dinner table tonight and wondered if it was true that Konbayoshi did indeed prefer someone who was good at conversing with other people.

“You better get comfortable, who knows how long we’ll have to be here for tonight.” The owner finally said after he tossed his cell phone on the dash board without a second care. It was useless right now, thus, Konbayoshi wanted to pay it no attention anymore.

“I’m sorry, owner-sama.”

“Why are you apologizing?”

“I don’t know.”

The owner looked at him for a moment before he chuckled and moved his seat back ‘till it was against the back seats, allowing more room for himself to move about. “There is nothing you need to be sorry about.” He stretched out his legs and reclined the back of his seat as well.

Kazuya looked over at him –this time, he could do so openly- and admired his form. This was the man he loves and would continue to love, he was a fine specimen and Kazuya knew that he did the right thing. He didn’t care what other people said about his choices.

“You don’t have to feel restrained here. Make yourself comfortable, who knows how long we’ll have to be here for.” Konbayoshi carried on while unbuttoning his suit coat to allow himself more room.

“Yes, thank you.” Although Kazuya was still diligently holding onto the overcoat that Konbayoshi had handed him earlier. At length, he decided to follow what Konbayoshi had done, he slid his seat back enough for him to stretch out his legs and unbuckled his seat belt. The car was still humming in its parked status; Konbayoshi had just turned on the heater for the passing of the night.

“Do you mind if I smoke?”

“No, please go ahead.”

Kazuya wanted to remain just like so, close to the owner and being able to watch his every move and gesture. Like how he slid the butt end of the cigarette in between his lips and lit the tip. Carefully, Konbayoshi opened a slither of the window to allow some fresh air in exchange for the smoke that has filled the interior of the car. Just a slither so the pouring rain outside won’t rush into the car.

Konbayoshi glanced over at Kazuya; he’d like to think that his eyes did not linger for too long.

“Am I so intimidating that you have to bunch yourself together like that?”

“Eh? No, no, no, not at all!” Kazuya shook his head and hands at the same time to negate the other’s question. Konbayoshi had continued looking at him with somewhat narrowed eyes.

“Are you worried that I’m going to molest you?”

“What?!” Please do? Kazuya wondered if he could even think that in his head.

However, his shocked tone had amused Konbayoshi into laughter. “I was only joking, relax.”

He should be relived to hear that Konbayoshi was no rapist in making, but at the same time, was it sinful for him to feel… well, disappointed that he wouldn’t be molested? “So then, what type of people would you molest, owner-sama?”

The question seemed to have surprised Konbayoshi, his hand paused midway in the air and the owner looked over at Kazuya with lifted eyebrows. “Excuse me?”

“You’re excused.” Kazuya replied archly, in a manner that was atypical of him. However, as soon as that sentence left his mouth, he regretted it immediately. It was fine to speak to his friends like that. “I meant, you know…” So he would start with trying to redeem himself. “… Well, at dinner Narumi-san mentioned the type of person you were into and I guess I was trying to…”

“Narumi.” Konbayoshi felt that familiar vein throb once again. He could swear that every vein in his body was assigned to a person in this world, depending on which vein that throbbed, it would be a certain person who’s annoying him. “Don’t listen to her; she doesn’t know what she’s talking about half of the time.”

“So then, it’s not true? What she said at dinner?”

Here, Konbayoshi remained silent for a brief moment before answering slowly. “You know, in a human’s life, there is always some sort of regret, right?” Kazuya nodded slowly, his attention was focused completely on the owner. “And the objects and people within that regret will always be regarded as optimal, as what’s wanted and as what’s to strive towards.” Kazuya nodded slowly, grasping the idea vaguely. “So rather than a type that I’m supposedly into, it’s more like a regretful fantasy that I’m sure everyone’s had at least once in their life time.”

Konbayoshi didn’t know why he felt the need to explain his thoughts to Kazuya. Usually, he would have just brushed off the question without a care, for it didn’t bother him whether other people believed what Narumi described to be his ideal type or not.

A regretful fantasy was perhaps the best term to describe it.

“I’m not sure if I completely understand, but it’s still saddening to hear. To put it lightly.” Kazuya commented quietly while hugging the overcoat to him, at this point, he didn’t seem to mind that the owner would witness such a scene.

Saddening? Was it really? Konbayoshi didn’t give it more thought; instead he reached out and ruffled the other’s somewhat damp hair. “Then stop thinking about it, it’s nothing important.”

“But how can I just stop thinking about it?” Kazuya sat up straight and looked at the owner with large eyes. Then he realized that perhaps it sounded a little too eager. “I mean, I know I’m young, but you can still talk to me if you need to.” It was the first step to becoming closer to the owner and to show him that Kazuya could be mature as well.

Konbayoshi looked at Kazuya with surprise in his eyes, to think he’s lowered this much that a kid would say this to him? Finally, he chuckled and leaned back against the back of his seat with a small smile on his face. “If I ever need to talk, huh?” He closed his eyes, and Kazuya thought that it meant he was going to sleep. Instead, moments later, the owner’s low voice carried on. “Have you ever loved anyone?”

At that moment, Kazuya’s heart started beating faster than it was designed for. He looked at the owner’s profile and spoke carefully. “I do know what loving someone feels like.” Intentionally, he phrased his answer in such a way as to subtly hint at the owner.

“What does it feel like?”

Kazuya was taken back; his body visibly moved back just a tiny bit for that question to settle. He had not anticipated such a question. And so blunt as well. “Well… it’s… hard to describe.” He didn’t even know how or where to start. “For me, it feels as if the majority of my life revolves around the person I love.”

For you, I joined this club to become a host. I want to be the number one so you will notice me more, care more and maybe I’ll be precious to you.

“It’s bittersweet if the other person does not realize it, but every little acknowledgement can feel like drops of honey. Even if it’s just a glance.”

Like now, if I can have such a conversation with you for the rest of my life, I will die happy.

“But I think most importantly, knowing that there is someone in your life whom will give you a purpose in the darkest of hours beats everything else in life.”

Kazuya knows that no matter what happens in the future, his feelings wouldn’t change.

There was a long silence after Kazuya finished his conclusion, the young one didn’t know whether he should have spoken so much and so candidly as well. Retrospectively, was his words strung together strong enough for a subtle hint? He leaned against the back of his seat and looked at the owner’s profile.

“Is that so.” It was more of a statement than a question; it was evident that the owner was digesting Kazuya’s words seriously.

This was yet another aspect that Kazuya admired about the older man. No matter how young everyone knew him to be, the owner will take his words seriously. Like now, he will reflect upon the impact of his words.

“… are you... in love with someone, owner-sama?”

“I don’t know.”

His answer surprised Kazuya, he had expected a none of your business instead. At the same time, he couldn’t help but feel hopeful and dreadful at the same time.

That night, Kazuya fell asleep leaning against the leather seat of Konbayoshi’s car. He listened to the pouring rain outside beating against the surface of the car. They had stopped speaking after his question and plunged their surrounding to a comfortable silence. Slowly, Kazuya felt his eyelids grow heavy and his head favouring the leather seat. He knew he was dozing off. When he opened his eyes groggily from one of his bouts of sleeps, he found Konbayoshi’s suit jacket also draped over him, along with his overcoat that Kazuya was still clutching onto. He was sure that embarrassment was registered in his mind at that moment, but when sleep took over once again, he could only think about how warm the jacket was. It was laced with Konbayoshi’s body heat and his cologne.

When morning came, they were already moving along the streets of Tokyo once again. Kazuya sat up groggily and peeked around him. His clothes were dry, so were Konbayoshi’s overcoat, and his suit jacket that was still over him. For a brief second, he felt spoiled by a considerate lover.

The two of them did not speak further of what happened that night, Kazuya was returned to his room and resumed his training per usual. In fact, just that afternoon, Bakusui had woken him up for training with not an ounce of sympathy for him. Instead, it was Takumi who looked at him with concern, but Bakusui did not let a single word come in.

Such was the life that he had told Narumi he enjoyed.

At the end of the week, early on a sunny morning, Kazuya zipped up his jacket and hopped into the manager’s car with a bounce in his steps. Narumi had followed up with her offer of having Kazuya baby-sit their daughter, and Kazuya didn’t see a reason to decline either. It was a chance to earn some pocket money, even though all will be saved for purchases that`d be deemed fitful for a host.

The manager and his wife were going to attend some sort of conference that deals with lost in translations. The actual content of the conference was something that escaped Kazuya. The manager had given him an example of telling the difference in when to use happy and great. It earned a blank look from Kazuya, and the manager laughed.

“In the world of literature, every word counts.”

Haruno ended with that and Kazuya just nodded mutely at that.

Their daughter, named Erika, was a shy little girl who peered at him with timid eyes from behind Narumi. However, she was an obedient little girl who did not fuss even when her parents left them alone and disappeared from their sight.

“Erika-chan, what would you like to do today?” Kazuya knelt down in front of Erika to be on the same eye level as her. Erika looked at him with her large eyes and then pointed upstairs hesitantly. Kazuya followed her finger before rising to hold out a hand for her. “Would you like to show me where you want to go?”

There was hesitation before she nodded and took his finger. Yes, finger. Kazuya realized that Erika’s hand had closed around his pinky in the cutest manner ever. And he couldn’t help but smile. Now he could understand why the couple fussed over their daughter so much.

It was hard not to love her.

Kazuya spent the day with Erika putting together a 5000-piece puzzle. When she had first led him to her play room, he prepared himself for hours of tea party with dolls; instead, she sat down in front of an incomplete puzzle and started at it. Kazuya looked at the scene with utmost surprise before settling down besides Erika to help her.

Hours passed silently; there was limited talk between the two of them. When they finished lunch, Kazuya managed to convince Erika out for a small walk before finally returning back to the house and just in time for Erika’s nap time. The little girl was an angel; she was not fussy and did not complain no matter what was offered to her.

Kazuya bid Erika a good sleep before closing her bedroom door behind her. Coming down the stairs, he caught the clock on the wall; it shouldn’t be too long before her parents would be back as well. He made sure to clean up the kitchen and dining room before taking his time looking over the decors of their house.

There were all sorts of certificates and medals that showcased the couples’ achievements and educations. He was surprised to learn that Haruno once worked as a translator, a quite good one at that, based on the certificates that he’s received. So then, why was he working in Opiate and working for Konbayoshi when he could call his own shots? It’ll at least make a topic of conversation when they’re on their way back.

Coming into the family room, his eyes were drawn to the photos atop the fireplace. From left to right, he could identity the people captured. Haruno when he was younger, Narumi when she was younger, many pictures of Erika; and of course, pictures of Haruno and Konbayoshi together. It truly showed how long their friendship has indeed extended. Then, one particular photo caught his eyes.

He couldn’t quite place the age of Haruno and Konbayoshi, but he instinctively knew that it was a while back. Haruno and Konbayoshi stood behind a high back chair on either side of it, and seated was a beautiful young woman smiling with a soft curve of her lips. She has long blonde hair, wavy to her shoulders and extending further down her back, he was sure. Kazuya’s never seen anyone like her in this series of photos he’s already been exposed to. Yet at the same time, there was something off about this female that he just couldn’t quite put his fingers on.

It was an intrinsically wrong feeling that he couldn’t suppress.

Her gaze and smile haunted Kazuya’s mind ever since then.

To be continued...

Author's Notes: I apologize that this took so long! I had wanted to update this many times in the past couple of weeks, but school was tough and then the Olympics happened.

The next chapter will be a side story that loosely fits into this time line, and then it will go back to the main story arc. Feel free to let me know which character you'd like to see more of, as I'm thinking of placing a few of these side stories throughout the story.

Thank you to everyone who's been reading and reviewing, I much appreciate them!