The Disgust in Their Voices

I arrive home around two in the afternoon. Mum would bring Nathan home at three, so that gives me an hour to quickly make my homework. I make myself a cup of tea and I sit down behind Dan’s desk. Our house is small. It is a four room flat with a small bathroom and a small kitchen. Even though it is small, I really love it. Not only because I live with someone I love, but also because it’s part of the little family we’ve formed.
I start making my homework and after an hour, the bell rings. I quickly clear the desk so Dan could work there without being bothered by my books and I make my way over to the front door. As I open the door, I hear the familiar squealing noises Nathan always makes. My mum is holding Nathan in her arms.
‘Hello love,’ she says as she putts Nathan on the floor. She kisses me as Nathan runs past me towards his toys. ‘How was school?’ she asks as I step aside to let her in.
‘Dull,’ I say. It was the same thing I would have said three years ago. ‘Don’t want to talk about it. Do you want some tea?’
‘No, I’ve an appointment at the physiotherapist at half past, so I’ve got to go.’
‘Alright, see you later,’ I say as I kiss her. I wave at her as she turns the corner and I close the door.
‘Bizkit!’ I hear Nathan squeal. I always gave him a biscuit when he got home. I went to the kitchen and gave him a biscuit. I kiss his rosy cheeks and he runs off back to his little play corner.
We never overly spoiled him. We always told family and friends not to buy him toys. We didn’t wanted him to get used to a life full with everything he wanted. We weren’t strict to him, but we didn’t want to overdo it by spoiling him.
I sit down on the sofa and I pick up the book that’s sitting on the table. I have to read two books this term, so I had already started on the first one. I had learnt from the course three years ago that I would really have to start early on these!
I’m only halfway through the page when Nathan is tucking my trousers.
‘Look!’ he says as he gives me three bricks of Duplo which forms a lump that looks like a broken piece of – I don’t know what.
‘What is it, love?’ I ask as I take the Duplo building.
‘Daddy!’
I laugh very hard and run my fingers through his sandy-brown hair. ‘Put it on his desk so he can see it when he gets home,’ I tell him and give him the Duplo back. He takes it and runs to Dan’s desk, standing on his tiptoes as he placed it on the desk.
I watch him as he continues to play with his Duplo. Every time I watch him play, I realize how much I love being a mum. I had never expected to have children, leave alone this early in my life. But it had been the best years of my life so far. It had been hard, especially since I was so young and it all had came so unexpected, but I wouldn’t trade it for any other life.
At five, I start making diner for the two of us. Dan will be home late, so I cook for three (two and a half actually) but place a plateful in the microwave.
Nathan and I eat dinner and I let him watch Sesame street as I do the wash-up. As I’m drying of my hands, I see a figure walk past the kitchen window and I smile. It’s Dan. The front door opens and Nathan begins to squeal and runs towards his father.
‘Da’y!’ he squeals and Dan picks him of the ground.
‘Hello tiger,’ he says as he kisses the boy’s cheek before he puts him down again. ‘Do I smell lasagna?’ he asks as he turns to me. I chuckle and he kisses me while he places his hands on my waist.
‘I’m sorry about this morning,’ he says and I brush my fingertips past his jaw.
‘No, It’s fine,’ I tell him as I release myself from his hands. I put on the microwave and return to the sitting room. Dan has moved his bag to his desk and starts to unpack.
‘How was your day?’ he asks as he sits down at his desk. His eye catches the Duplo building Nathan made this afternoon. ‘What’s this?’ he asks as he picks it up and runs it through his long, beautiful fingers.
‘That’s you!’ Nathan says as he clamps himself only Dan’s leg.
‘Really?’ Dan asks and I hear the amusement in his voice. ‘It doesn’t really look like me, does it?’
‘Yes it does,’ I say as I sink down on the sofa. ‘You can be made of stone sometimes.’
‘Very funny,’ Dan says as he gives the Duplo back to Nathan.
Not much later, it is Nathan’s bedtime. Dan takes him to bed and reads him a bedtime story. I turn on the telly and watch some MTV before I turn on the news. Dan comes back in and he sits down next to me with a deep sigh. He wraps an arm around me and pulls me tight and close to him.
‘So have you made your homework, missy?’ he asks as he kisses my temple.
‘Yeah, yeah,’ I sigh annoyingly. ‘I never leave my traces. I wouldn’t dare to mess up your desk.’
He chuckles and together, we watch the news. It is only half past eight when I yawn. Yes, I’m tired. I had to get up quit early this morning and it is something I hate. I prefer to lie in bed all day, preferably with Dan of course.
‘I’m going in,’ I say to Dan as I reach out to the book I had left on the salone table before I had started to make diner. ‘Bit of reading,’ I yawn as I kiss him and drag myself to the bedroom. I throw the book on the bed and begin to undress. I put on the tanktop I always sleep in and in the bathroom I brush my teeth, clean my face and brush my hair. I go back to the bedroom and crawl into the bed and under the covers. I continue to read but after just a few pages, Dan comes in. I can see he has turned off the TV and all the lights, so he’s getting in as well.
‘Don’t you have teacher stuff to do?’ I ask teasingly as I turn the page of my book.
‘Yeah, but I can do that tomorrow morning.’
‘Lucky you,’ I sigh as I realize I have to get up quite early again. Dan only works three days a week so he can take care of Nathan and still earn enough. I work in the weekend because I want to be at home in the afternoon for Nathan.
Dan strips down and I peek at him over the rim of my book. Even though other girls my age may find him old, I think he’s deadly attractive. I really can’t keep my eyes of him as soon as he’s near me, especially when he’s getting rid of his clothes.
His chest is nice and flat but it’s his stomach where his skin a bit older. His hip bones remark how skinny he is. But I love those hips. God if he only knew how much I used to fantasize about kissing those hips.
Once during class, he had taken of his sweater, accidently pulling up his t-shirt as well, revealing his stomach and those wonderful hipbones. I had spotted it, and during the rest of that day I hadn’t been able to concentrate anymore – my thoughts had kept wondering to those magnificent hips all the time.
He notices me as he sits down on the bedside and takes of his socks. I force my eyes to look back at the book but a grin appears on my face.
‘I feel scrutinized,’ he says as he throws his socks in the corner where we always left our dirty laundry.
‘I’m reading,’ I say but in fact, I haven’t read a single word of the page yet.
‘I don’t believe that.’
‘Believe what you want,’ I say as I keep forcing myself to look at the page.
‘Well,’ Dan says as he turns and crawls towards me, placing one hand on the other side of my thigh. I pretend I’m still reading as he says: ‘I might need to force it out of you.’
I smile, but I still don’t look up.
‘Were you looking at me?’ he asks as he runs his nose past my forehead.
‘Nope,’ I say as serious as possible. ‘Just reading.’
‘Do you want me to use force?’ he asks as his hand that was placed next to my side moves to my side. He pinches my side and I yelp, smacking him playfully on the head with my book.
‘I’m reading!’ I say and I use a tone as if I’m telling him off.
‘I don’t believe a sod of that,’ he says as he takes the book out of my hand and throws it away from me.
I sigh, pretending to be irritated as I try to reach out to pick up the book, but he closes his hand around my wrist and pulls me back.
‘I wasn’t finished,’ he says as he brushes his nose past my forehead again.
I grin and I run my hands from his chest over his shoulder, reaching his neck where I play with his hair. I’m about to kiss him when I hear a wail from the other room and we both sigh.
‘Mummy!?’ I hear Nathan cry and I briefly kiss Dan before I crawl from underneath him and make my way over to the other room.
I return two minutes later.
‘He dropped his teat,’ I say to Dan as I switch of the lights in the hall. I find him on the bed and he has picked up my book, reading the first page.
‘Trevor let’s you read this?’ he asks with disgust in his voice. ‘It’s dull!’
‘No, it’s alright after a few pages,’ I say as I climb on the bed. I decide it’s my time to be mischievous so I kiss his thigh. I purposely skip over his boxer as I place my mouth on his stomach.
‘Does Trevor call this literature?’ Dan asks and I feel amused when I hear his voice tremble slightly.
‘Hm?’ I say as I kiss his chest before I look up at the book. ‘I don’t know – we just have to read it,’ and now it’s me who takes the book from his hand. But instead of throwing it through the room, I gently close it and place it on the next stand.
I settle myself on his lap, my hands in his neck and I brush my lips past his. His hands find the bottom of my tank and his hands slip underneath the fabric as he caresses my bared waist. His hands are warm and so is my skin. But his hands touching me always give me a feeling of overheating. He can be so gentle when I needed it, and even a bit rougher when I want it. It reminds me of what he had said earlier.
‘I think you were about to punch something out of me,’ I breath as I place my lips on his chin.
‘Was I?’ he asks and I truly hear the confusion in his voice.
‘Yeah – you wanted to know if I was looking at you!’ I say as I withdraw my head again, acting as if I’m offended.
I always forgive him when he forgets things. He’s got a rather busy life and maybe it’s his age as well that makes him forget things. I know he used to drink quite a long when he was younger (and he still does sometimes) and I’m sure it has damaged his memory. But I love him too much to become irritated because of that.
‘Oh yes,’ he says as he wraps his arms tightly around my waist, pressing my body down against his. ‘But I don’t want to hurt you.’
‘You know you won’t,’ I say as our faces are close, our lips just not touching each other.
‘Good guess,’ he says as his hands find the rim of my tank again and he pulls it over my head, revealing my pale breast. After years of being together, I have learnt not to feel embarrassed near him. I know he loves me and I love him enough to reveal myself entirely for him. ‘I would never do that to you,’ he whispers. I know why he’s saying this. I know he still feels regrets for what he had done to me when I got pregnant of Nathan. I was so deeply hurt and broken about it that I could still become depressed about it if I thought back of those few months.
‘I know,’ I whisper back and I kiss his face lightly and my hands wander of down towards his chest. I caress his skin as he kiss, his hands resting on my thighs, following my curves as he moves them to rest them on my behind.
The longer we continue to kiss and touch each other, the more I begin to feel him getting hard underneath me. I rest my hands on his thighs and he hisses while I move a bit back so I can take of his boxer. Before I settle myself back on top of him, I take of my own knickers, taking him inside me as I climb back up.
He suppresses a groan and I hook his arms around his neck as I start to move my hips, making small, but strong circular moves. I know what he likes, and I always do my best to please him. I often see how he closes his eyes, throwing his head back and groans with pleasure. I teas his throat by kissing him, running my lips past his Adam’s apple, licking the bulge in his throat.
I feel how he begins to relax his muscles, trying hard not to come yet. But I will forgive him if he does.
‘Let go,’ I breath as I run my hands past his jaw. ‘Come – now.’
I see him look at me for a few seconds, a battle going on behind those eyes. But he’s panting rather heavily and I feel his muscle tighten and he throws his head back. He comes inside me, groaned loudly.
I let out a satisfying sigh, kissing his collarbone as I let him rest. After a few seconds, his chest still heaving up and down, he looks back at me. I look at him from under my eyebrows as I press a soft kiss on his chest, where his heart is. He runs his hand through my hair and kisses my forehead.
We never talk much after sex. We always prefer to just cuddle up against each other and fall asleep. Tonight is no exception, so I lay down next to him, wrapping my arm around his waist as I nuzzle myself against his chest. He turns slightly onto his side, kissing my head again and his fingers playing with my hair until we fall asleep.