Silent Attraction

Part 4


Adam threw himself onto his couch, face buried in the cushions and groaned. He was so tired. It had been a hard week but more than that, he was in a foul mood. Twice he’d lost his temper at work and chastised his team, not too harshly but considering he didn’t lose his temper generally, this was highly unlike him. From the stunned expressions on his colleagues’ faces it showed only too clearly just how out of character he was behaving. He apologized immediately and then was left feeling extremely embarrassed with the extra care and assistance his team provided to him, thinking it was due to stress as they tried to ease that burden as much as they could.

Now he was home again; drained, strained and fed up with himself. He didn’t know what was wrong with him. He was generally a pretty even tempered person overall. Sure, he had his bad days, but he took care not to let it spill over into his work or affect others. Now he seemed to lack that iron control he usually held over his emotions, his nerves feeling stretched to the point of breaking, and his body was continuously tense.

Last weekend when he’d reached for a second bottle of wine he had paused. He’d finished the first bottle whilst busy tapping at his laptop before pushing it away, unable to concentrate on work any longer. He had intended to seek further inner calm with some additional wine, but an image of piercing eyes with dark hair framing a chiseled face rose in his mind, and his hand had halted halfway.

Adam rolled over and stared at the ceiling. All he needed was rest. Surely that was it. Reaching up he loosened his tie and undid the top buttons. Another day and it would be Friday and he could finally relax. His eyes drifted shut, and immediately Kyle’s image was there. Adam’s last thought was, couldn’t the damn man give him any peace?


Upon arriving at the club, he immediately went to the bar, having to wait for a moment before a space cleared. He commandeered a seat and waited to be served, when a drink was placed before him almost immediately. He looked at it in surprise as he hadn’t even placed an order yet.

“Hey,” Adam motioned the bartender as he began to move away. “Is this for me?” he asked indicating the drink.

“I haven’t been told anything different.” The bartender grinned. “You may as well enjoy it.”

Adam picked up the drink, swirling it around. He hadn’t expected this to continue but as it was this meant that whoever was paying for them would have to be someone who was a stead-fast regular. It was strange that his benefactor hadn’t tried to approach him yet after all this time. It was making him more wary now. This seemed beyond just a simple case of admiration.

Still, it was pointless to refuse with no good reason so he picked up the drink and began to wander through the crowd, looking for a dancing partner for the night.

“Adam! Darling!” A voice called to him and he turned just in time to have two arms thrown around his neck.

“Whoa!” he exclaimed, saving his drink from disaster. “Steady on there, Marcus.”

“Sorry, sweetheart,” the thin man said, stepping back a little to check he hadn’t caused a problem. “I was just so excited to see you. It has been simply ages.”

“Yes, it has been a while,” Adam replied with a smile at the flamboyantly dressed man before him. Heavy eyeliner and gleaming tinted lip gloss adorned his face above a bright aquamarine silk shirt that bore frills down the front to where it was caught by a single button at his midriff, with ruffles around the cuffs. The leather pants were so tight they left nothing to the imagination, and his whole ensemble was finished off with a leather peak cap set at a jaunty angle on permed hair.

“So where have you been?” Marcus demanded, slipping an arm through Adam’s.

“Around,” Adam stated. “Busy with work.” He looked at Marcus. “What about you?”

“Oh, I’ve been here most times,” Marcus stated, flicking back imaginary hair from his face with a be-ringed hand. “I saw you with that delectable little blond morsel and didn’t want to cut in.” He wrinkled his nose in mock distaste. “I know how some people misinterpret my presence. I didn’t want to spoil things for you.”

“Thanks, Marcus. That was very considerate of you.”

“You could always thank me in another way,” Marcus said in a sultry voice, suddenly pressing into Adam’s side, resting both hands on one shoulder, leaning in close to blow in his ear.

Adam just smiled at him. “You’re too much man for me, Marcus.”

Marcus snorted and leant back, dropping his seductive pose immediately. “Ha!” he said with a flick of his head. “As if! I’ve heard stories about you,” he said, waggling a finger at Adam. “From all accounts you’re a real demon in the bedroom.” He gave a loud sigh. “I so wish I could find a man like that. Someone who can be really masterful… hmm.” He gave a wriggle of delight at his fantasy.

Adam just chuckled. “Don’t believe everything you hear. Haven’t you got a partner at the moment?”

“Well,” Marcus began. “I’ve just started seeing that delightful honey-bun over there,” Marcus half turned to indicate a man leaning by the wall nearby. Adam couldn’t help but notice the strategic tear sewn into the back of Marcus’s leather pants that artfully curved under his left buttock cheek. He smiled to himself. That was just so like Marcus: not afraid to flaunt his wares.

Marcus had actually been Adam’s first friend when he had moved here, although they had never been physically intimate with each other. For all of Marcus’s flamboyant and sometimes over the top behavior he really wasn’t a bad guy and certainly not as loose as some assumed from his mannerisms.

Adam looked upwards then and froze in stunned surprise. Above him he could see Kyle standing at the rail, looking down. Shaking off his immobility, he pointed up at him, catching Kyle’s eyes so he was sure he was seen and mouthed ‘stay there’. Kyle made no move to indicate that he would comply but also he didn’t move away so, before he could change his mind, Adam quickly turned to Marcus and said, “Sorry, buddy, got to go!”

Marcus looked up also, following Adam’s gaze as it flicked upwards again to check that Kyle hadn’t left, and his eyes narrowed for a moment as he gazed at the figure above them, before glancing back to Adam, a small frown creasing his brow.

“Is that your date?” Marcus asked off-handedly.

“No.” Adam assured him with a smile. “I just need to catch up with him.”

“Hmm,” Marcus flicked another look upwards. “Well, be careful, darling. You can’t always tell what people are like just by appearances,” he said, giving a cautious warning. “Catch you later. Don’t make it so long next time.”

“Sure thing,” Adam agreed, accepting the peck on the cheek as farewell, giving another quick glance upwards to see that Kyle was still in the same place.

Leaving Marcus behind, Adam quickly made his way up the stairs, squeezing between groups clustered on them, and hurried over to Kyle’s side.

“It’s been a while,” he said as Kyle turned to face him.

“So it has.” Kyle responded, then turned back to survey the floor below.

Hell, doesn’t this guy ever smile, Adam wondered, looking at the smooth features. The closest had been that irritating smirk that he’d witnessed some time ago. Since then he’d never seen another.

Kyle remained looking away from him and Adam felt his irritation swell again. He was wondering why he had bothered coming up here. He had disliked feeling that there were unresolved matters between them, although Kyle showed little interest in his presence now. His surprise at seeing Kyle after all this time had made him simply react, for he had honestly begun to believe that he would never meet him again. Yet here he was. So Adam pushed his anger back down, not wanting this conversation to degenerate as their last had.

“I thought you might have stopped coming,” Adam said before the silence became too uncomfortable. Perhaps it wasn’t the classiest opening line, but it was the best he could do at this time whilst his gathered his thoughts. “I haven’t seen you lately.”

Kyle sent him a brief glance. “I’ve been busy. Did you want to see me about something?”

Irritation flashed again. “No. Not really.” This man never gave him any sign of what he was really thinking or feeling. “I mean, well, I just wanted the clear the air after last time.” He hoped that didn’t sound as lame as he thought it did. He mentally slapped himself. Nice one, he growled internally, chiding himself. At least try to act like an articulate adult.

“I see.”

Damn it, the guy wasn’t going to apologize, Adam thought, and then inwardly sighed. What did he expect after all? Kyle didn’t owe him anything. Fine, if that’s the way it was, so be it. He’d done what he had intended and tried to mend the broken bridges. If Kyle didn’t want to accept the peace offering being extended that was his choice, Adam’s conscience was clear. Perhaps now he could forget about it and things could return to normal. He began to turn away.

“Is that your new partner?” Kyle suddenly asked.

“What?” Adam turned back, surprised by the question and not quite understanding.

“That guy.” Kyle nodded downwards. “He seems to be a player. You’d better watch it.”

Adam followed his line of sight to see Marcus sitting on his boyfriend’s lap. “You mean Marcus?” He began to laugh so hard that Kyle looked quizzically at him. “Sorry,” Adam gasped out, still chuckling. “He’s a friend. He’s not my partner.”

“A friend? A good friend?”

“If you mean in a sexual way, no,” Adam stated and then wondered why he was explaining at all. He had no need to clarify or justify anything to anyone, certainly not to this man. So why was he?

“He’s just a friend.” He lifted his drink, feeling ruffled. Why was it that Kyle seemed to always be able to throw his normally calm emotions into disorder?

“Wondered if you’d begun to drop your standards.”

“Hey, don’t knock other people.” Adam frowned at him. “Who are you to look down on others?”

“I’m not. I’m just giving my opinion. You seem to have higher standards, that’s all. Isn’t that why you haven’t slept with him?”

“Standards have nothing to do with it. I value him as a friend.” Adam said.

“So you don’t value those you sleep with?”

“Of course I do!” Adam glared at him. “Don’t be an asshole. Are you saying you sleep with everyone you meet, including all your friends?”

“Haven’t tried it yet.”

“You’re a jerk.” Adam turned away before he completely lost his temper. This night was going from bad to worse.

A hand caught his shoulder and he spun around angrily, but Kyle released him immediately, keeping out of his personal space.

Kyle looked directly into his eyes. “If I insulted you, sorry. Now, and before.”

Adam met his gaze and then felt his lips begin to curl into a smile, before laughing out loud. He saw Kyle’s lips thin as though angered at being laughed at so he hurriedly tried to soothe him.

“Thanks,” Adam said. “To be honest I thought you wouldn’t bother saying anything about that.”

Kyle just shrugged, not adding anything.

“So,” Adam said, tilting his head to one side, a smile still on his face. “Can I buy you a drink this time?”

“Can you afford it?”

“Are you trying to pick a fight with me?” Adam raised his brows in query.

“Not particularly,” Kyle replied nonchalantly, moving away from the railing.

Adam turned and began to make his way to the stairs, Kyle falling into step beside him. “Then shut up for a while. Has anyone ever told you that you suffer from the worst case of foot in mouth that I know?”

“No, but I don’t bother talking with many people.” They headed downstairs.

“Oh, too good for them?”

“They’re just not that interesting usually.” Kyle looked over to Adam, catching his eye. “Only some people are.”

“So are you saying I’m one of the interesting people? I’m honored!” Adam chuckled. By now they had reached the bar and he motioned for the bartender.

“Yes, you certainly are,” was Kyle’s low even answer.

Adam turned toward him, caught by surprise at the intensity behind those words, and wondering why that simple statement sent shivers running up his spine in a far too pleasurable way.

The faint sound of a ring-tone interrupted them and Kyle reached into his jacket.

“Excuse me,” he said, raising it to his ear and listening.

Adam saw his features set even more rigidly. Obviously it was not something Kyle was pleased about.

Kyle flipped the phone shut and said, “I’m sorry, but I have to go.”

“Everything all right?” Adam asked.

Kyle nodded. “Just work. I’ll take you up on that drink next time.”

“Sure.”


From then on Kyle joined Adam each night he came to the club, the two of them sitting or standing side by side as they talked and drank. When there came a night that, after doing a quick search of the premises and not finding Kyle, Adam found himself sitting alone at the bar and he was approached by a younger man requesting a dance, he gladly accepted. It would fill in his time whilst he waited for Kyle, refusing to even think that he would not come.

As he began to move to the music, Adam realized that it had been a long time since he’d danced. Kyle didn’t dance, or at least had never asked to do so or shown any inclination that way. However Adam did enjoy dancing so why hadn’t he done so? Even though guys had occasionally asked when he was drinking with Kyle, each time he had refused. Spending that time with Kyle had seemed more important.

Now, as he felt the beat pound from the floor through his feet, flowing through his veins, filling his head with melody, he felt invigorated, fully alive, his whole body tingling. His young partner wound himself around Adam’s body sinuously, like a sleek cat demanding attention and Adam couldn’t help but smile in response. They continued to dance, stopping only occasionally to head to the bar for a drink before returning to the dance floor, all the while in the back of Adam’s mind was the constant question of where was Kyle.

Adam had been leaning on the bar, waiting his turn to be served, when a firm grip took hold of his elbow and tugged him around. He turned with a smile, thinking it was his impatient young dance partner, his words halting when instead he was faced with Kyle’s thunderous frown.

“Come with me,” Kyle growled and physically pushed Adam up the stairs and towards the back of the upper level. Adam thought of shaking Kyle’s grip off, but he could see that Kyle was upset over something, even though he didn’t yet know what. Perhaps something had happened that Kyle needed to talk to Adam about urgently. So he allowed himself to be lead away.

Kyle continued on until they reached the back door they had used before, opening it and pushing Adam through hard enough that he stumbled and thumped against the wall in the stairwell, unprepared for the force behind the shove.

“I thought you said there wasn’t anything going on with anyone.” Kyle grated out as he glared at Adam where they stood in the stairwell.

“Nothing is,” Adam snapped back, growing angry himself now at Kyle’s behavior, straightening and stepping away from the wall.

“Do you call that performance ‘nothing’?”

Adam brushed his hands against his jeans and pushed his hair away from his face, still staring down Kyle. “Even if it was, it is none of your business, so what’s your problem?”

Kyle grabbed Adam’s arm and pushed him back against the wall, pinning him there as one hand captured his chin before crushing his lips to Adam’s in a bruising kiss.

Adam froze for a moment, completely stunned, a sharp burst of heat flashing through his body. In all the time Adam had known him, Kyle had never shown any particular interest in any guy, not even to make a passing remark, and their conversations hadn’t included anything of a sexual nature. Adam had found that rather refreshing, thinking that obviously he wasn’t Kyle’s type, just as Kyle wasn’t his. This sudden act now clearly showed Kyle’s sexual leaning and although Adam wasn’t concerned about that, he felt a burst of intense anger at Kyle’s betrayal of his trust by trying to force himself upon Adam on a whim.

He pushed hard against Kyle’s broad chest, breaking his hold and swung, fist connecting solidly against the side of Kyle’s face. Adam was no weakling; he was fit, healthy and reasonably muscular so this was no love pat. The force of the blow rocked Kyle backwards, only managing to save himself from ending up on the floor by catching himself against the railing behind.

Adam glared at him, fists clenched, breathing heavily. “You fucking bastard.” He spat as Kyle straightened, reaching up to wipe away the trickle of blood from a split lip. “What the hell do you think you’re playing at?!”

Kyle looked at him steadily, not speaking, his silence only angering Adam further.

“Answer me!” he demanded, taking a step towards Kyle.

“Forget it,” Kyle said, turning his head way.

“Like hell I will!” Adam snarled, stepping forward again, bringing himself almost within arm’s reach. “You owe me an explanation!”

“It is no concern of yours.” Kyle looked back at Adam. “This is my problem.” He turned and began to walk away.

Adam reached out and grabbed a shoulder, spinning the man around to face him, furious that he was daring to just walk away from him. The sheer arrogance made his blood boil and his temper flare higher.

“Don’t turn your back on me!” He gathered a handful of Kyle’s shirtfront into his fist and held tightly. “Tell me what makes you think you had the right to do that?”

Adam found his gaze captured by the fierce look in Kyle’s eyes, a look that froze him in place. Kyle stepped forward quickly so they were chest to chest and reached up to grab the wrist of Adam’s hand holding him, strong fingers gripping hard enough to hurt, then jerked it away, breaking Adam’s hold but not releasing the captured limb.

“You want to know why I did that?” Kyle said in a low raspy voice, staring at Adam. “I can’t stand seeing you with anyone else!”

Adam stared at him in shock, and then recovered his thoughts. “Get a fucking life! I don’t belong to you. This stupid macho act doesn’t impress me; it just pisses me off! What the hell makes you think you can just do as you please?”

Kyle made no response and Adam searched the man’s countenance but could read nothing from the expressionless face. “Fine then,” he growled. “Be an asshole. It suits you.”

Adam jerked his wrist free from Kyle’s grip, breaking the hold and stepping back, placing more distance between them. Kyle opened his mouth as though about to say something but instead turned and began to descend the stairs in silence.

Adam gripped the stair railing, glaring down at the retreating back. “Don’t think you can just brush this one away,” he called down angrily.

Kyle looked up at him, face still displaying nothing, meeting Adam’s angry gaze, then he continued downwards.

Adam remained standing there for some time, although the sound of Kyle’s footsteps had long faded from hearing. Suddenly the tenseness in his muscles completely released and he slumped back against the wall, breathing hard.

Why? Why had Kyle suddenly acted that way? Adam had thought they had been getting along fine till then, with no complications to confuse matters. Now Kyle was acting like a spoilt kid when someone else plays with his toy. Was Kyle implying that Adam wasn’t allowed to do anything without his say so? Like hell! Adam was not anyone’s possession and he’d be damned if he put up with that crap from Kyle!

Adam ground his teeth. They were just friends, or at least drinking buddies, nothing more. Adam valued the comfortable relationship they had built, so this sudden outburst was unexpected. It was the first time Adam had seen so much emotion expressed in Kyle’s eyes; he was normally so calm and controlled. Yes, he would often say things that pissed Adam off, but there was no real maliciousness there. Kyle simply tended to voice exactly what was on his mind and precisely what he was thinking – when he chose to speak at all.

He breathed deeply, leaning back against the wall. He felt let down because Kyle hadn’t even tried to argue with him. The man had just silently walked away as though he hadn’t cared. Why hadn’t he refused to go? Why hadn’t he fought back? Why had he decided to be such a jerk in the first place?!

Adam reached up to wipe his mouth with the back of his hand to erase the phantom remains of the kiss but paused, instead touching his lips gently with his finger tips. Despite the action taken being rough, Kyle’s lips had been warm, molding with his own as though trying to draw something out of his soul.

He felt himself flush with a burst of heat that sent his blood racing as he began to remember further details. Every tiny fraction of that moment, all the things that he hadn’t had time to notice, now his mind supplied in great detail: the warmth of Kyle’s hand on his chin, the brush of fingers down his throat, the caress of hot breath across his face as Kyle leant forward. He recalled the feel of Kyle’s body pressed against his, the touch of his long leg between his own, the pressure of their hips against each other, Kyle’s body heat penetrating even through his shirt, scorching his skin. Adam was almost panting, his body hot, and the straining erection in his pants signified he was affected in other ways as well.

He groaned, eyes closing as he leant his head back, hearing the faint thrum of the music muted through the wall, hand automatically falling to the bulge at his groin, that simple touch making him shudder. He groaned again at the contact, turning his head to the side. He would not jerk off in this stairwell like some pathetic adolescent. He wouldn’t! But his erection didn’t want to abate as the memory of Kyle’s touch assaulted his mind again and again relentlessly.

Adam slid to the floor, back still against the wall, letting his head fall forward into his hands. Oh shit, what the hell was wrong with him?! He should be angry. In fact, he should be downright furious with Kyle pulling that stunt! It was pathetic really, completely childish, done in a possessive manner that generally bespoke inner insecurities. He was certain Kyle didn’t suffer from that! He should be so angry at Kyle for ruining their blossoming friendship. So why was it that instead of being angry with the man, the thought of him was making him shake with desire? This response was all wrong! What the hell was going on?!

Suddenly, he completely froze, raising his eyes over his clasped hands to stare at nothing, his erection forgotten. No, it couldn’t be. He felt almost terrified as his inner voice whispered again in his mind an answer to his unspoken question. Surely he was imagining things. Kyle wasn’t anything like what he would choose, not a single thing, so why…

He struggled with himself, hands pressing together so hard his knuckles turned white. He must be mistaken, it couldn’t be that, nothing could be further from the truth. Yet why was it that the thought of never seeing Kyle again actually made his chest…hurt? He felt his eyes burn with frustration, although he now felt cold all over.

He couldn’t be…?


Adam remained sitting in the stairwell for a long time after, breathing deeply, and trying desperately to control the roiling emotions battering relentlessly against his mind. Finally, he dragged himself to his feet and staggered down the stairs, not from the effects of alcohol; the emotional upheaval had burned the last vestiges of that away so now he felt cold stone sober. No, he had trouble walking simply because his mind was too full of other thoughts, so the mechanics of movement were not close to the forefront. As he made his way down, glad to be able to avoid the crowd inside, a part of him was hoping that he might find Kyle waiting for him at the bottom, waiting to apologize so they could wipe this night away and return to what they had before, but there was no sign of him.

Arriving home, he fell into bed, staring at the ceiling for the rest of the night, and when the dawn’s light filtered through the window he was no nearer to attaining clarity of mind than he had been the night before.