Tokyo Boys

Note for the chapter:
* Did a little research on the subject of rape in Japan, I think the difference with western countries is interesting which is why I mention this. Japanese ppl prefer to keep their skeletons in the closet (not just rape and homosexuality, but everything that is considered not normal, like mental illness...). only 11% of the rape cases are reported and it's mostly by foreign women. On account of those foreign women, it's incredibly difficult to bring a rape case to court because the victim has to do all the work themselves - gathering evidence, playing out the crime scene... very cruel. And as I've mentioned before - psychological help is not common at all.

* udon - type of thick japanese noodles.


TOKYO BOYS
Chapter 34


Shouji waited for a while after ringing the doorbell. He stepped over some weeds and peeked through the small kitchen window, trying to see if there were any signs of life inside the house. He was about to give up, when Yuuto’s mother showed up.

“Kaname-san?” He turned to face her and bowed. “I’m Moriyama Shouji, Yuuto’s homeroom teacher.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, sensei… did he not show up again today?” Chika apologized and bowed. “He didn’t have a fever last night and I told him he could go to school if he wanted to.”

“May I speak to him in private?” Shouji requested.

“Of course…” She opened the door, turned the lights on, and led the teacher to her son’s room.

“Yuuto, are you awake? Your teacher is here…” she announced after knocking on the door.

Shouji gasped when she opened the door. The room was dark and musty, like it’s not been aired for a while. When the woman flicked the light open, he noticed the tray of uneaten food on the tatami floor.

Chika apologized, grabbed the tray of food and left the room, closing the door behind.

“Kaname-kun?” Shouji kneeled.

“I’m sorry, sensei…” Yuuto said quietly. “You’ve come all this way for nothing.”

“For nothing?” Shouji raised his eyebrow, trying to catch a glimpse of the boy’s face. “What do you mean? Are you faking illness?”

Yuuto clutched his pillow, without turning to his teacher. “I don’t think I’ll go to school again.” The boy’s voice trembled.

“What? Why?” Shouji grabbed the frame of his glasses, as if it could make him see the boy’s face better. “Get up, Kaname-kun.”

Yuuto opened his eyes hearing the sudden stern tone in the teacher’s voice.

“It’s not the proper way to speak to your teacher when you’re skipping school.” Shouji decided to be more firm with the boy.

“And what you’re doing with Daisuke is proper?”

Shouji furrowed his brow. He didn’t expect the boy to speak back. “Kaname-kun, I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”

“Just leave me alone…”

“Not until you give me a good reason on why you suddenly decided to drop out. Or should I ask your mother?”

“Don’t!” Yuuto sat up sharply and then grimaced, grabbing his head.

Shouji knew he got his trump card. “So you haven’t shared your decision with your mother yet.”

Yuuto held his head in both hands, looking to be in pain. Shouji was torn between supporting him and pressing the soft spot a bit longer.

He decided to do both.

“Is it because of the money?” Shouji reached out to hold the boy, when he flinched in pain.

“Don’t touch me…” he whispered, his body visibly shaking.

“What’s wrong, Kaname? Are you in pain?” Shouji asked in concern. “Let me see…”

He tried touching the boy again.

“Sensei…” The boy cried softly. “It hurts…”

“What is it, do you have a headache?” Shouji asked. He wouldn’t be surprised. Lying without moving or eating in an unaired room for three days was enough for anyone to develop a killer migraine.

“I’ll ask your mother for aspirin… but you need to eat.”

“No.. sensei… please… I’m fine… I’m sorry…” Yuuto grabbed Shouji’s arm, while still hiding his face in his knees, as though he didn’t wish to show his crying face.

“You don’t seem fine to me… I don’t have to tell you how weird you’re acting, do I?”

Yuuto sighed and dropped his arm. “I can’t talk about it…” he whispered.

“I asked your mother to give us privacy, so you don’t have to worry about her dropping in…” Shouji said softly.

“I can’t… I can’t…” Yuuto pulled at his hair. “I can’t…” The tears he fought to hold back broke through his lowered defenses.

“Kaname-kun… I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s the problem. Please, that’s what I’m here for… you can tell me anything.” He repeated, trying to coax him gently.

Yuuto rubbed his eyes. “Why should I talk to you… you’re dishonest… I don’t believe you…”

“Is this because of Daisuke?” Shouji asked carefully. “You’re right, of course. I should’ve never given in to him… trust me I’m thinking everyday how to get out of that mess with both of us unscathed…” he sighed. “I know that the longer he stays with me, the bigger the odds someone would find out… but I’m trying to help him, believe me.”

Yuuto continued hiding his face in his sleeve. “I hated you…” he whispered. “He always talks about you… he never cared for me like that…”

“Who are you talking about? Daisuke?” Shouji smiled. “He talks about you all the time.”

Yuuto still didn’t move and the teacher continued, “He was so worried about you yesterday and in fact I’m here because he asked me to help you…”

“Really?” Yuuto sniffed.

“He said there’s something very wrong with you…” Shouji explained. “So if you will, please trust me that I’ll do anything in my power to help you, both of you.”

Yuuto remained quiet in his place. Shouji could hear the small hitches in his breath as he tried to stifle his cry. He wondered if the boy was ready to speak. He knew that the sudden decision to drop out of school wasn’t because of the relationship he was having with Daisuke, even though it seemed to have a crushing effect on the young boy.

“It hurts…” Yuuto whispered just loud enough for the teacher to make out the words.

Shouji gasped when he caught a glimpse of Yuuto’s face for the first time. His face was red and swollen. Sure, crying so much made his eyes all puffy, but the colored swelling in his face looked more like he jammed into a wall.

“What happened to your face?”

Yuuto flinched when the teacher grabbed his chin, forcing his head up.

“Did someone do this to you?” Shouji asked. “Were you bullied?”

When no reply came he continued pressing, “Was it someone from school? Is that why you don’t want to return?”

Yuuto shook his head, shaking the teacher’s hand.

“It’s because I was stupid…” Yuuto tried to keep his voice steady without much success. “I thought… I thought I could be more like Daisuke…” He rubbed his forehead, keeping his eyes away from the teacher’s watchful gaze.

“I wanted to see what it was like… to be him… so I…” He hiccupped. “I went to… meet his friend…” Yuuto paused to lick his dry lips. “Sensei…” he whispered, “can you.. please pass me that glass of water?”

Shouji looked at the tray Yuuto’s mother left in the room when she took away the older one. He picked the bottle and poured Yuuto a glass of water. The boy gulped the liquid almost at once and Shouji refilled his glass, encouraging him to drink more.

“Are you talking about his friends from… that place?” He tried to see if he was following correctly. He had a bad feeling about it.

Yuuto just nodded. “It was okay at first… but he let me smoke something weird… it made me feel funny…”

“Did he do anything?” Shouji asked. “Did he… force himself on you?”

Yuuto’s lip quivered and Shouji clutched his hand, feeling anger building up.

“I… I… don’t really remember everything that happened…” the boy stammered. “It hurt and I asked him to stop and he wouldn’t listen… and then his friends came and they…” he spoke for as long as the breath he took allowed him. “Please don’t tell anyone…”

“Kaname-kun…” Shouji said quietly. “Did you go to the hospital? After it happened?”

Yuuto shook his head. “I… I can’t… it’s too embarrassing…”

“You should get checked… you’re still in pain, aren’t you?” Shouji got up. “Let me take you to the hospital.”

“No!” Yuuto cried out. “It’s my fault… I was stupid…”

“Firstly, it’s not your fault… and secondly, you need medical help. Don’t worry, I’ll sign as your guardian so they won’t need to contact your mother, okay?”

Yuuto wasn’t sure what made him agree. He wanted to hate Moriyama-sensei, he wanted to continue rotting in his futon until he died. He wanted Daisuke to feel just as bad as he was feeling. But somehow he just couldn’t go through with it. Moriyama-sensei was too nice, and too pushing… Yuuto didn’t know if what he was saying was true, but it sounded like it was. Yuuto didn’t know what to think anymore. He just knew he wanted the throbbing pain in his body to stop.

~*~

Looking at the bright light coming from the entrance of the hospital, Yuuto felt like turning back and running away. But Moriyama-sensei put a strong hand on his shoulder, whispered some encouraging words and guided Yuuto into the hospital.

“How are you doing, Kaname-kun?” the young doctor on duty asked. Yuuto just nodded shyly as the doctor put a finger under his chin and forced his head up to inspect the swelling on his face. “I’m Dr. Yamanami Kousuke. You can just call me Kou-sensei. When did the incident happen?”

“Two days ago…” Moriyama-sensei said when Yuuto didn’t respond.

The doctor looked down at the boy. “I understand you don’t want to report the incident to the police?”

Yuuto shook his head vigorously.

The doctor threw a brief glance at Moriyama-sensei. They both knew it was rare that any rape victim, let alone a male victim, had chosen to file an official complaint.

Yuuto looked on as the doctor rolled his sleeves. “I’m going to take some blood to check for HIV and other venereal diseases.”

Yuuto continued nodding. He hasn’t said a word since they’ve entered the hospital, but still cooperated and just braced himself and took a deep breath when the syringe entered him. When the doctor asked him to step behind the curtain for examination of his genitalia, Yuuto felt panic taking over him.

“Sensei…” His voice came out sounding high pitched.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be here,” Moriyama-sensei said softly, reassuring the petrified boy.

Yuuto stepped behind the veil and removed his pants and underwear. His cheeks burned with embarrassment as the doctor’s gloved hand touched his bruised organs.

Finally the doctor told him to get dressed. Yuuto pulled up his pants quickly and walked out to Moriyama-sensei’s side. It seemed so surreal, hearing the doctor talking about his injuries and explaining the methods of treatments. It felt like he was talking to someone else. How could such a thing ever happen to him? He was just a normal boy that no one paid mind to.

“Come on, I’ll take you for dinner like I told your mother,” Shouji told the boy once he was released from the hospital.

“I’m starving…” Yuuto admitted.

~*~

They entered a small dark lit Japanese restaurant. There were very few customers inside but the place was warm and the owners were delighted to host them. Yuuto sat down carefully, making himself comfortable in a less painful position. At least the cushions provided nice comfort.

“Ah, no sake for him,” Shouji said, raising his hand to stop the waiter from pouring Yuuto a glass.

“Sensei… thank you,” Yuuto whispered when they were left alone. “I feel better now…”

“There’s no point to keep suffering quietly.” The teacher nodded and took a sip from his drink. “I wish I could’ve been a better help…”

Yuuto looked at the dish in front of him. The doctor suggested eating only soft and easy to digest foods so sensei had ordered udon soup for him.

They ate quietly for a while. Then Shouji put down his bowl and rested his face on his elbow, looking at the boy at his side.

“What are you going to tell Daisuke?”

“Ahh…” Yuuto was stumped. “I was so mean to him, he probably hates me now.” He fretted.

“That’s impossible.” Shouji smiled. “He cares for you so much, you’re important to him.”

Yuuto lowered his head. “He’s just like an older brother… protecting me from bullies and fighting my fights… he must find me an incredible nuisance…” His voice broke.

If Daisuke was with me, he would have never let it happen… if only I didn’t run away from him…

As though Moriyama-sensei read his thoughts, he rested his large palm on the boy’s shoulder. Yuuto flinched, but didn’t move away from the touch.

“There’s no use dwelling on the past, we all have to move forward… you still have your future ahead of you, you can’t allow yourself to break down now,” the teacher spoke softly but firmly. “You need to get into Geidai, remember?”

Yuuto nodded and bit his bottom lip nervously, thinking it was easier said than done.

“I may be a little out of line here, but…” Shouji withdrew his hand and grabbed his drink. Yuuto took the opportunity to wet his throat and sipped from his green tea.

“You’re in love with Daisuke, aren’t you?”

Yuuto almost choked on his drink. He started coughing, holding a hand over his throat. “Sen… sensei!” he said once the coughing fit subsided. “What are you saying?”

“Isn’t it true, though?” Shouji smiled. He could see why Daisuke would like this kid. He was too cute, especially when looking all flustered.

“He’s… he’s… he’s a guy…!” Yuuto stammered, trying to keep his voice low.

“So? You already know that doesn’t bother him.” Shouji shrugged.

“But… but… it’s Daisuke…” Yuuto felt the heat rise to his face. The warmth of the restaurant became intolerable, or maybe it was just him feeling on fire. “He’s my best friend… my… my only friend.”

“I'm not saying this because I think you should get together. I just think you should tell him how you feel,” Shouji suggested. “I think it will make you feel better to get it off your chest.”

“What about you?” Yuuto looked at him suspiciously. “What’s in it for you? Daisuke is your… your… your lover…” Yuuto winced. It was not an easy thing to admit.

“You know, Daisuke is not my property, and I’m not planning to keep him either. Of course I don’t regret taking him in and helping him out, but if I were more of a responsible adult and teacher, I wouldn’t have given in to his seduction.” Shouji played with his glass.

“No one can resist him… don’t be hard on yourself…” Yuuto found himself comforting his teacher. “For the last three years I’ve seen him ‘dating’ so many people I’ve lost count… but only with you…” he hesitated. “You’re the only one he stayed with for so long without cheating… he must really love you.” His face saddened at the sudden realization. He spoke without thinking, but it was true. And the bitter taste left in his mouth after spitting the words proved him that Moriyama-sensei might have been correct, too.

.
.
.