Caramel: Book 3 of the Lord Emperor Vampire Series

Symoblic tissues to everyone. Didn’t mean to get the waterworks going again. Who is in the painting? Read On. Read, On.

ATOI: Yes, I did happen to see Phantom of the Opera. I was fortunate enough to see the last matinee performance before it left Toronto. Then I was kicking myself for not going sooner so I could see it again. Paul Stanley from Kiss fame with the Phantom. Found it to be a little odd choice but it was good. I had seen Les Mis first and didn’t think anything could top that but Phantom came pretty damn close. I absolutely hated CATs. (I fell asleep in it)

Yes, I know everyone wants Vladimir to get his tail kicked by Claudius. And there is a cue for Lanseng and Azrael…however, all good things come to those who wait…the meek shall inherit the earth…yadda, yadda, yadda. It will get there, eventually.

Thank you yet again, Loyal and true: Rosemary; Rosei; a.taste.of.insanity; k; miles; shiden; tsuki the moon; spirt; Hallowseve and Mihara

WARNING: YOU MIGHT NEED SOME FEEL GOOD NIBBLES

Enjoy!


Chapter 124: Secrets & Lies

“Stop him.” Lanseng cried out.

Both Haley and Vladimir moved into action. Vladimir dropped off the top of the landing to the lower floor Haley squeezed between me and the wall stopping a couple of risers away from me. “Lord Alpha.”

Lanseng came to the top of the stairs, “You need to speak to Marcus, Azrael.”

“What’s the point? He doesn’t listen.”

“If that painting is of Xavier, why did he call it Az?”

“That’s not my name. He knows that. Get out of my way Pup. I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already have.”

“You belong to Marcus.” Haley just stated it like it was fact. I wanted it to be fact. I wanted it with every fiber of my being but, how does that song go, you can’t always get what you want. I glanced back at the blue haired, crimson eyed representative of the Blood Collective. But you get what you need. Lanseng was sexual release. That’s all he could be. I didn’t want to use him like that again. He deserved more and right now, I didn’t have the capacity to give it to him.

“I don’t belong to anyone!” I returned narrowing my eyes. “I wanted to belong to Marcus, but he doesn’t want me.”

“That’s a lie.”

I turned and faced the master of my destruction. Marcus Du Bussey Von Drachenfeld. He was going to be the death of me one day…and stupid, stupid me. I would gladly let him.

“What was that?” I let my voice stay cool.

Marcus came forward. His hair was damp and he only had his dress pants on. “I called you a liar. Are you a coward as well?”

A hand clamped around my heart and squeezed. I shouldn’t have to live with this kind of pain. I twisted and tried to get past Haley. The little pup got up in my face. I could have shoved him out of the way but X’s recollection of placing his extended fangs on the back of Haley’s neck stopped me cold. The pup had been inches from death…by our hand. A wave of dizziness swept over me. I ended up sitting hard on my ass on the stairs. I reached out for the wall to steady myself and got Haley instead.

/Oh, Alpha. If you didn’t protect us, you would never have been hurt./ He pressed his forehead up against mine. /Marcus loves you. Let him show you./

I’m surrounded by matchmakers. Hades and Liam was a shock. Phantom of the Opera. I snorted and let my head rest on Haley’s shoulder. I was still weak and dizzy. Lanseng now X’s little Lycan Pup and working together to get us back together. I could only assume Vladimir was here for his own piece of ass.

“Take my hand, Azrael.” I stiffened as Marcus’ voice sounded right beside me. He offered his hand, palm up, his long artistic fingers together. I traced his hand to his arm up to his face. Well he wasn’t drunk. There was an Armor-ish steely resolve there. What did Lanseng say, my Puppy needed to grow up? Was this growth? “Take my hand.”

I was debating within my own thoughts when my traitorous body acted on it’s own. My pale flesh was engulfed in his massive mitt and he gently drew me back to my feet. His touch was like a groom’s gentling hand on a skittish mount. “Give me the chance to explain my art, Azrael.”

I followed him back into the studio. Lanseng blocked the Lycan and shut the door behind us. Marcus coaxed me forward. If he tried to pull me, I would have broken free and started back downstairs. Yeah, right. Who was I kidding? I was right where I wanted to be with a deep, rending heartache and devastating soul-ache. I could smell his essence. I closed my eyes and savored it.

“I know pain means love to you, Marcus. Have you stopped to think, that it doesn’t mean the same to me?”

“Yes.” There was a low sigh, “Please open your eyes, Azrael and look at my painting.”

“I’ve seen it.”

“See it through my eyes, then.”

Huh?

“This is my moment of clarity. This is when I realized what have done to you Azrael.” His voice was low, barely above a whisper. “This is when I realized how selfish I’ve been, and how much that selfishness stripped from you.”

“That’s Xavier. I don’t look like that.” I opened my eyes and looked, really studied the painting. We shared the body, but he knew what I meant. I played my emotions close to the vest. Sex shared his joy, sadness and everything fleeting thing with the world. X. He was a class act.

“Azrael, this is the expression you had on your face before you realized I was in your office with you. You were unguarded and vulnerable. This is something you never let me see. Then you held Father’s dagger and told me, “If I can’t love you…I don’t want to love you.” I heard you, Azrael. I heard you.”

“That’s me?”

“When I’m not around sucking off your energy. May I hold you?”

I glanced up at his face. He was trying to keep expression off his face but his eyes held a hurt that called out to me. I’d never learn. I leaned back into him. His arms came around me and he hugged me to him with a desperation that had driven him into a bottle for two days. He curled his hug body around me, wrapping me in a cocoon of protection that I so wanted to believe in. My Puppy. Here I am crawling back to you again. Come and kick my teeth in.

“If you let me, I want to try and make it better for us. You’ve been there for me so many times. You’ve kept me alive, you’ve kept me safe and I’ve acted like a spoil child. I’m sorry, Azrael.” He pressed his cheek against the side of my ear. “I can’t change our past, but I will make our future better. If you want a future with me…” His voice trailed off.

I looked at the painting. His love was locked in that pigment on the canvass. “You’ve whispered beautiful words to me before and I believed you. When you broke them, you ripped me open and left me bleeding, Marcus. When it comes to words, you are a beautiful liar.”

He stiffened and tightened his grip almost to the point of pain then his warmth dropped away. “You have a gift for words, Marcus. I don’t want words from you. I want truth.”

I turned and brought my hand up to his cheek. He opened his eyes. They were swimming with unshed tears. “Your truth is that.” I gestured over my shoulder at the blue angel caught in a moment of utter honesty. I caught his hand and brought it up to my lips. “You mouth whispers beautiful lies but these…” I pressed his palm against my right nipple, against our nipple ring, against our pledge. “can only speak the truth.”

“I love you, Azrael. You, no one else.”

“Liar…” His eyes snapped up to mine. “Show me the truth, Marcus. Show me that you love me…make this pain go away. Make it ago away and make it better.”

A ring of red flame slowly rose up from the white of his eyes to glow around his dark brown iris. I’d never seen the flame rise up before. “Azrael.” His back of his fingers stroked along my cheek, moving back to my hair. He tangled his hand in my extra long hair. I found myself plastered against his chest. I tempered my actions keeping my hands at my side.

“Close your eyes, my Blue Angel.”

I let my eyes close then I felt soft gentle kisses press against my forehead, my temple, on my eyelid along the cheekbone that had been broken so long ago. Butterfly light, butterfly teasing, butterfly fluttering lips that finally reached my mouth. I opened my jaw in response to his swift but gentle tongue prodding. I was being seduced. I was being cherished.

Where was the violence I had come to expect from our pairing? I never expected this – gentleness—from Marcus because he had never showing me a hint of it. I laid a hand on his waist; my thumb stroked lazy circles on his warm smooth flesh. I let my other hand come up and tangle in his hair. Tentative kisses. Tentative kisses from new lovers who were exploring their partners for the first time. I opened my eyes and looked at him. He had his own eyes closed. Was this our first time? Could it be the first time we should have had? Honestly in my heart, when I took over from Xavier completely the time in the limo, that wasn’t love. It was rape. I held him down and forced my desires on him. He was weak enough from blood loss—now that X had experienced it full force. Marcus had been near death, he was beyond Blood Starvation when I claimed him.

I started this cycle of violence. I had no one to blame but myself.

“I’m sorry, Puppy.”

His eyes opened still red with the ring of fire. “Azrael?”

“I said, I’m sorry. When I first came to you, I held you down and I took what a wanted without any regard for you.”

“I didn’t mind.”

“You should have. Just as I should have told you to stop when I had taken all I could endure. We need to do something different, babe. We are tearing each other apart and if what we have is love, it shouldn’t be that way.”

“This is love, Master.” He searched my face, “This is my way to love. This is not your way. Mine has turned into a disaster. Show me how to love your way.”

“That’s it, Puppy. I don’t know how.”

Marcus let me go but urged me to turn and face the painting. He brought his arms around my chest and across my waist. His head rested on my shoulder. “This is what you hide from me, Azrael. Maybe you had to hide it because you know I couldn’t handle it, maybe you hide it because you know what is what I wanted. I was content to let Father take care of me. I had my music and my painting. It was all about me. Even with you in my life, I let it stay all about me. I fucked up. Don’t hide from me any more Azrael, my pet Angel, my Master. Let’s figure this out together because….” He tightened his grip even more. “I want to come home.”

“Sex kicked you out…he’d have to be the one to let you back in.”

“No. You are my home, Azrael. I feel complete with you. I feel safe and cherished. I feel loved, the way I should have been when I was growing up, before Father came and saved me.”

I felt a burning in my eyes. Don’t hide? Tears, he brought me to tears, yet again. “You know what I was thinking at that moment…all that sadness. That song you sang to me, was playing in my head and all I could think of was that I wished those words were true. I thought I was going to bleed forever because you ripped my heart out. I decided I was going to remain celibate and learn the cello on my day out.”

Marcus whispered those words with a low hurt filled tone. I meant for those words to wound…and they did. “If I can’t love you; I don’t want to love you.”

“I wasn’t going to love anyone.”

“You are not meant to walk alone, Azrael. I know Lanseng has offered comfort. I would rather lose you to him than to have you walk alone. I love you Azrael, my Angel of Death. I don’t deserve it but, please let me come home.”

I blinked the tears back. “If I let you back in my heart” Who was I kidding, he’s never left it. “and you attempt to walk away from me again. I’ll hamstring you before you get three feet. If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it’s yours. You’re mine Marcus. I won’t let you turn your back on me again. Know that now, before you ask me again to come home.”

“Take me home, Azrael. Lock the door and throw away the key, chain me to your bed.”

“That’s your way of loving…”

“Where would you chain me?”

“The shower…don’t fuck me over again, Marcus. I don’t think I’ll survive.” I let a big sigh out of my chest, “And, I know you wouldn’t because Sex would slit your throat.”

“He hates me.”

“He’s protective of us. As a big brother should be…”

“I’ve failed Armor in that regard as well. I haven’t been much of anything in all my years. That is a hard thing to face, Azrael.”

“So change it.”

“I am trying. Starting with you. I wish I could tell you that I would never hurt you again but that would be another promise I couldn’t keep.”

“That is a start. If I don’t like something, I’ll tell you. I would suffer through everything you wanted because I didn’t want you to leave me. Secrets and lies, Marcus. It’s no wonder we fell apart. You’ve been telling lies and I’ve been keeping secrets.”

Marcus untangled himself from my embrace and dropped down in reverent pose. “I beg you, Azrael, Angel of Death, Head of the House of Assassins, please let me come home. I will try to be less selfish. I will try to listen to you. I will try to be a better partner.”

I just stood and looked down at him. He had lied to me before. He lied to me all the time but…he made me complete. “There is a mantra I live by, Marcus. Do, or do not – there is no try.”

His shoulders stiffened. “Master…”

“Do you promise to think of how your actions affect me before you do them?”

“Yes.”

“Do you promise to listen to me, and to actually hear me. If you don’t understand, you will ask me to repeat it.”

“I promise.”

“Do you promise to place me first in your heart before my brothers?”

“I love Azrael. Only Azrael.”

“Marcus?” He lifted his head. “Welcome Home.”

Marcus grabbed me around the knees and stood up. Holy shit! I almost flipped over backwards. I had to grab onto his shoulders. He tightened his hold and rubbed his face against my thighs. I grimaced. He was going to pop my kneecaps off. Then he spun in a circle. Not good when I was dizzy to begin with. I tightened my grip on his shoulders before I flipped off him. “Master?”

“Down…need to get down.”

Marcus set me down and I just kept going. He caught me around the upper arms and lowered me to the floor. “What’s wrong? Azrael? LANSENG!!”

The door to the studio opened and the three stooges tried to get through the door way all at the same time. Haley wiggled through first and I thought he was going to punch Marcus in the head. /No! I’m just dizzy. I need food./

Haley skidded to a halt. “Vlad, Lord Alpha needs his blood.” The White Russian turned and disappeared back out the door. Haley dropped down beside me checking me over to make sure I wasn’t injured. Zsigmund at work.

“I’m fine, Haley.”

“Are you back together now?”

Marcus offered up a sweet beautiful smile. I reached out and cupped the back of his head. I didn’t have to tug he moved forward slowly until we were in butterfly kissing distance.

“I guess that’s a yes.”

Lanseng glided in. He cocked his head to one side staring at Marcus then finally gestured to Haley. “Marcus, could you please bring Azrael downstairs. We will all share a meal in the dining room then you can start getting ready for the Opera.” Marcus opened his mouth to say something, “We all know that you want to, as William so gracefully said, ground. That is part of your problem. You started in bed. Stay out of it for a bit, get to know each other. At least, until Azrael can get through dinner.”

Marcus picked me up bridal style. Gees.

“Haley, show them the way.”

“I can walk.”

“Why walk when you don’t have to?”

Lanseng stepped in front of Marcus and looked at the both of us. He reached out and stroked my long hair then cupped Marcus’ cheek. “Vladimir will be coming to you two. Claudius and Xavier have made it clear that they will not honor Sex’s matebond. Do not leave Vlad twisting in the wind. His Alpha marked him. One of you will have to dominate him and they had nominated you, Azrael.”

He turned his gaze to Marcus, “Remember, I am in the mix here. I have earned my place in the Blood Emperor’s bed."

Hello. I’m right here. Lanseng looked up at the painting. “You have a rare talent, Marcus.”

“Thank you.” Lanseng stepped sideways and gestured for Marcus to proceed. I had made my half hearted attempt at projecting my independence. I was glad he was carrying me, because I think I would have flopped down the stairs on my face if I attempted it.

Dinner was a strange affair. I don’t remember ever being this hungry. Not true, a bout of Blood Starvation kind of left everything else incomparable. I ate like I was a contestant at a pie eating contest. Marcus was grinning behind his coffee mug of blood. Haley decided to join me in my feeding frenzy and used his paws to shovel food into his mouth. Vladimir sat in his chair and stared at me totally stunned and unsure of what to think or feel. Lanseng just sat there in his usual refined elegance and cut his well done steak. The Lycan crew and my own could have mooed if I stabbed it a fork. I held it with my hands and let my fangs slice off chewable chunks.

Finally Vladimir put aside his shock and picked up his steak, tearing into it with razor sharp Lycan teeth. They look so human when they take this form; it is hard to remember that this is foreign for them.

I finally slowed down. I was like a plump….vampire. “May we use your bed, Lanseng? Our little Angel is going to fall asleep at the table.”

What? I blinked sleepily over at Marcus. “Come, my little owl.”

“Whooo.”

Haley did his muttly snicker. “You are not invited Haley, Vladimir, Lanseng.”

“Don’t worry, Marcus. I’m sure I can find something to keep us entertained.”

“Come along Hootie.” I got picked up again. I should be grateful, I got my own chair to eat from. He could have done an Armor and I would have to sit on his lap. Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad. No, that would lead to penguining. No thank you.

I was out of it. Literally. I roused myself as Marcus pulled the sheets and blankets over me. Why am I naked? I watched as Marcus stood beside the bed and stripped off. “Slower. You’re not going to make any money that way.”

“We can play this game some other day. You can barely open your eyes, Azrael.” I nestled back into the soft marshmallow mattress. I didn’t appreciate it the last time I was in it. Okay, keep that to myself. The bed sank as my big Vampire crawled into it.
Naked as the day he was birthed to this new existence.

I got pulled over towards him. “Turn on your side, Master.”

I rolled over then found myself wrapped in big strong arms. And tucked up against big strong thighs. With a big hard cock pressing up against my back. I missed this. “I missed you, Puppy.”

“Remember that feeling, Azrael. I’m never leaving your side again. You’ll soon want me out of your face.” My hair got shifted and I felt nibbles on my neck.

“What’s that for?”

“I’m home.” He laid his head on the same pillow. I brought my hand up and interlaced our fingers together.

So was I.